requested by ShadowLombax28 <3
back by popular demand, incorrect-er and better than ever
filler chapters my beloved
—
- D.A.M.N boys -
{damien}
freelancer: how petty can you get?
damien: i once edited a wikipedia article to win an argument i was wrong about.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{huxley}
huxley: a theif.
freelancer: thief?
huxley: theif.
freelancer: i before e, except after c.
huxley: thceif.
freelancer: no.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{lasko}
lasko: what's your biggest weakness?
freelancer: i can be uncooperative.
lasko: can you give me an example?
freelancer: no.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{gavin}
gavin: freelancer! my face is on fire!
freelancer: gavin! are you okay?!
gavin: oh yes, i'm fine. i just said that to make sure you'd come in here quickly.
freelancer: but your face is on fire.
gavin: yes. it's much faster than shaving.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{caelum}
freelancer, in a meeting: my policy is if you see something, say something.
caelum: i saw a squirrel in a tree today!
freelancer, with the tone of someone who is used to caelum: outstanding.
freelancer: this is what i'm talking about people.
- the wolf pack -
{david}
david: i'm going to take you out.
angel: great, it's a date!
david: i meant that as a threat.
angel: see you at five!
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{asher}
*asher and babe are doing something absurdly dangerous*
asher: i think houdini did something like this once! why, if i recall correctly, he was out of the hospital in no time!
babe, deadpan: well that's encouraging.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{milo}
milo: you fuckers don't know about my knife stick. it's a knife taped to a stick and it's the ultimate weapon.
sweetheart, not looking up from their book: spear.
milo: BLOCKED.
- the solaire clan -
lovely: i slept for almost 12 hours but i might still be tired so let's go for 12 more just in case.
vincent: lovely, that's a coma.
lovely: sounds festive.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{sam}
darlin': what's up guys? i'm back.
sam: what the- you can't be here. you're dead. i literally saw you die.
darlin': death is a social construct.
- empowered bois -
{elliott}
elliott: date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
sunshine: if anyone, and i mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{avior}
starlight: here's some advice.
avior: i didn't ask for any.
starlight: too bad. i'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who talks to me.
- unempowered bois -
{aaron}
aaron: *stubs his toe* FUCK!
smart ass: mind your language!
aaron: what else am i supposed to say, "woe is i"???
smart ass:
aaron: you have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimes.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{ollie}
ollie: i'm 10 times funnier and sexier than you.
baby: 10 times 0 is still 0 though.
ollie: jokes on you, i can't do math.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{geordi}
geordi: change is inedible.
cutie: don't you mean inevitable?
geordi, spitting out coins: no, i did not.
- ʚ♡ɞ -
{marcus}
marcus: stop buying plastic skeletons for halloween! it's terrible for the environment!
love: yeah! locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly!