"Hello, Lisa. It's pleasure to finally meet you," a tall man with a heavy Italian accent greeted her, with a smile so wide it literally went from one ear to another, as she stepped into the venue after having her photo taken by some media who were busy taking pictures of every invitee of an event held by one of the Italian luxury brands. They just launched their latest watch and jewellery for their collection and Lisa, who was recently crowned their brand ambassador, was invited to attend the launching.
The man was one of the higher-ups of the company and at the moment, he was busy introducing and explaining the newest members of their collection while Lisa was busy getting distracted by the commotion at the entrance. She saw a glimpse of a figure she recognised, the particular figure who comically enough had reserved a space in her head.
SUHO of EXO.
The name was ringing in her head—in uppercase too. Then it was as if almost immediately and automatically, an imaginary stringing of loud euphoric screams of an ocean of people in a stadium followed the name in her head. He was a rockstar and the flashing lights from cameras that took turns to shower his face somehow only confirmed the title. He swept the room with his unparalleled visual—as expected from an artist from SM Ent.
He was perfect.
And that moment could not be any more perfect.
Lisa was convinced that life was pursuing a career as a bloody clown for putting her in an event with none other than Suho, the man she did not know personally but already despised. She knew she was being silly and her brain had told her for the umpteenth time that she was not in a position to feel anything towards the man, that if anything, she was just being bitter because the man was caught kissing Irene in a photo frame—Irene, who was just a sunbaenim, practically someone she had nothing to do with.
But Lisa could not control what she felt and she was way in over her head; the head that was currently full of three million reasons why she hated the oblivious man or why she should hate the oblivious man and at the very moment, the number one reason why was because he had been busy entertaining himself with his phone, she believed he was texting and being blinded by anger (and jealousy) Lisa also managed to convince herself that he was texting Irene.
If that was the case then Irene seemed to have all the time in the world to reply to the man's text and she did not even bother to spare seconds to reply to hers or return her calls for the longest time.
It was agitating.
She tried to act nonchalantly because she was aware of the number of pairs of eyes that were watching them, but her heart could not shrug off the negative vibe it created.
It was only by the helping hand of God that Lisa managed to civilly attend the event without creating a commotion; like killing the man, perhaps, considering the thought did cross her mind a couple of times (more like countless times).
They left the venue almost at the same time, Suho went into his van first and Lisa went into hers not long after. She did not have any plan, really, but the moment she was aware of Suho's van in front of hers, she demanded her manager to step on the gas tailing Suho's vehicle. She was plain mental—so she convinced herself, to follow Suho's car that she believed was heading to Red Velvet's dorm. True to her suspicion, the van they had been tailing made its way to the basement of the apartment complex where Red Velvet's dorm was located.
The moment both vans stopped, she saw the tiny figure that she knew all too well skipped her steps approaching Suho's van. The man had already stepped out of his van, wearing the same happy smile as the one Irene was wearing. They hugged each other tightly before it was abruptly interrupted by Lisa's venomous voice.
"Is this it?"
The two were out of it. They were not expecting any company other than Suho's manager, who knew the nature between Irene and Suho. Irene was the first one who looked Lisa right in the eye. Her eyes were bulging, almost popping her eyeballs out. While Suho was still trying to collect himself, trying to figure out what was currently happening.
"L—Lisa?" Irene was surprised. What in the world? She thought.
"I ask you. Is this it?!" Lisa repeated herself as if Irene did not just hear what she asked in the first place.
"What are you on about?"
"Don't act all innocent. It won't work anymore!"
"I—" Irene was confused because she really did not know what Lisa was on about and why she was so mad.
"Lisa! Hey, Lisa! Calm down," Suho butted in and tried to diffuse the sky-rocketing tension between the two women. He did not know what was actually happening but it was pretty damn obvious that Lisa had lost her mind somewhere. Suho tried to grab Lisa's hand which had been pointing at Irene rudely. There must be some explanation there since he knew that Lisa was not supposed to be the kind that went off and threw fists randomly even when he did not know the woman personally.
"Bugger off! Mind your own bloody business!" Lisa was fuming mad and her venomous attitude started to explode uncontrollably. Suho was left stunned.
"Lisa! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Irene half screamed by then. Lisa was being too much and unreasonable.
"Is this why you have been ignoring me more and more?! You kissed me then you go on kissing him, huh?"
"This—" Suho tried to arbitrate the two clearly fuming women. He was scared for their lives if anything. The scene was so intense he was afraid one of them might lunge and kill another.
"—If I were you, Lisa, I would've chosen my next words very carefully," Irene cut Suho abruptly yet calmly, she chose to fight her own battle because Suho definitely did not understand what was happening. Irene's words were latched with venom too, if Lisa was anybody else, it would be best if she just shut her trap all at once, even more then when she was being stared under such an intimidating and intense glare from Irene's cold eyes—even Suho was scared for Lisa's life right at that moment. But of course, the fuming Lisa did not care about the gaze or the advice to choose her next words carefully and wisely—if anything, it only added fuel to her uncontainable rage. So she proceeded into the opening act of what she would later believe as something she should not have done.
"You told me you liked me and almost immediately you went about dating him. I'm happy I didn't fall for that sweet mouth of yours. You bloody snake," Lisa hissed.
Well, that was unfair.
And Irene did not have that. She refused to be treated that way. How dare Lisa came in hot like that and slapped her with such an accusation without at least confirming the true story or having a bit of decency to ask her first.
But who was she kidding?
What really ground the older's gear was actually the fact that none of it was even Lisa's business in the first place; whoever she kissed, whoever she dated, hell—even whoever she fucked was none of her business.
Who the fuck did she think she was?
"What is your problem, kid?! We are nothing! You made it clear yourself. I get to kiss whoever I want, whoever actually picks me! You don't get to come here, make a ruckus, and accuse me of things you don't even fucking know about. Get over your arse!"
And that slapped Lisa. She knew. She knew that they were nothing but why she could not help herself feeling so agitated she wanted to punch a bitch. The past months had been hard for her; between her feelings for Jennie, her realisation of what she had for Irene, the news about Irene and Suho, and her attempt to deny and bury her feelings for Irene, she had been struggling to stay afloat. She could not even share her thoughts because she did not want to burden anybody else. Everything was overwhelming for her. Then there she was getting all bothered by the thought of Irene and Suho, she turned a blind eye for a moment. She had never felt anymore smaller than she was feeling right at that moment. Gone was her rage, what was left was just her ruin but she tried to stand tall because the bitterness still lingered in her mouth distastefully.
"Sod off, Lalisa Manoban," was what Irene said before the woman left her alone in that basement dumbfounded.
"Screw you, Bae Joohyun," was all the Lalisa Manoban could whisper out at the end.
Suho had been keeping his own thoughts to himself, giving the full-on-rage Irene a chance to calm down. He did not want to poke the seething dragon any more than necessary, he would like to keep his head attached to his body, thank you very much. It was only by the time they arrived at their destination, 30 minutes away from Red Velvet's dorm, that he could see Irene slowly becoming herself again at their favourite food stall.
"Was it Lisa?" Was the first thing Suho asked as he poured soju into Irene's glass. The woman acted as if she did not hear what he just asked and kept her poker face. Suho was relentless though, he poked her with the question again. He was being bold because he could see that the tension had diffused significantly and he deserved to know the story after being put in such a situation as he was earlier.
"The one who broke your heart, it was her, wasn't it?" Suho cornered Irene who just rolled her eyes and chugged her soju in one go, seemingly trying to channel her frustration into drinking instead; she felt like there should be a game where every time she was frustrated she just drank.
"That wasn't supposed to happen," she surrendered to Suho's persistence before it annoyed her and she turned blind eyes she punched the man in the face.
"Heh. That's exactly what happens when you ignore a problem for far too long," Suho sneered. He knew that things between Irene and Lisa were not the peachiest at the moment but he did not know how terrible it actually was. For Lisa to wear her rage on her sleeves shamelessly, things must have been really ugly.
"There shouldn't have been any problem if you didn't fucking kiss me, Junmyeon," Irene recalled Lisa's main point of the problem why she started the scene in the basement with two horns at a ready to headbutted everyone standing on her way.
"Now she thinks I date you," Irene sighed in her exasperation; the first problem they had had yet to find its enlightenment then the second problem had already made its appearance.
Why did loving Lisa come with so many obstacles?
Was it the universe's way of telling her to stay the fuck away from the woman?
If that was so, why could she not restrain herself from the urge of screaming 'screw you, universe'?
Why was it that even then when her rage had dispersed, her main concern still did not lay on Lisa acting insufferable towards her but on the fact that Lisa thought she was dating Suho instead?
Suho, on the other hand, could only drink his beer because he realised he was partly at fault. It was a one-time thing out of the spur of the moment, yet whatever they said would be held against them because it was a shred of concrete evidence against the words of the two. He did not know that it would have been captured in a frame and even almost made a debut to the public. It would be a big problem for him should it ever make an appearance in public because he was currently not in the best position either. He just officially took a break with his girlfriend, which was why he asked Irene if she was available for a friendly date with him, he needed someone to drink with him.
"Enough about me. What about you? What's the occasion?" Irene asked as she took a sip out of Suho's bottle. It would help her sober up, so she convinced herself. She was just there for the free meal and tipple since Suho said he was buying her if they held a Heartbreaks Club meeting that night.
"My girlfriend and I just decided to take a break."
"The same person who broke your heart last year?" The last time Irene checked Suho had reconciled with the woman not long after they met at that place the last time.
"The one and only."
"Why?"
"I'll be enlisting in the military early next year so I'll be away for a while anyway and she has to prepare for her bar exam so she can't afford any distraction—her words."
"Is she in law school or something?"
"She is a law student, yes," Suho admitted with pride glazing all over his words, but then cocked his right eyebrow as he saw a 'are you for real?' look on Irene's face instead of a 'oh, that is cool' one.
"What's so surprising about it?"
"Nothing. I just never pegged you as someone who's able to woo an intellectual," Irene shrugged, it did successfully make Suho roll his eyes in annoyance though, and for Irene that was a win.
"I'll propose to her once I'm discharged," Suho announced out of nowhere, it looked like it was the first time he said it out loud because he could not hide the blush blooming on his cheeks—and that was not from the alcohol he drank because Suho was pretty tolerant. It made Irene think, however, about how Suho could confidently say so when the both of them; his girlfriend and he himself would be away for some time and on a break while they were at it.
"Two years is a long time. What if she changes or you change? You never know, don't you?" She voiced her worry.
"She's not that kind of person. I'm probably a lucky man, for being able to experience the kind of love that is enough. For she and I, if it's not us then it's nothing at all. She is enough for me and luckily so am I for her. We don't go looking for anything more in any other person. We are enough for each other and most importantly, I believe in us," Suho smiled confidently and she knew that what he said was true.
Enough was probably her answer too; on why she could not help herself from falling for Lisa deeper—even when the woman was so dense, a bit insensitive, and even when she had slowly shown some parts of her that were not the tiniest bit pretty.
What Lisa did was enough to make her hate the younger. If it was anybody else, she would have just left immediately and considered them dead from that point on.
If it was anybody else—
If.
But it was Lisa after all, was it not?
She supposed it was true, if it was not Lisa then she probably would not want it anyway.
----
Lisa was sitting on the couch at Red Velvet's dorm, head buried between her slender palms with Seulgi patting her back, sitting next to her, while Joy and Yeri looking at the scene torn between wanting to laugh or pitying the Blackpink maknae.
"Yah, I've never seen eonni getting that angry, Lisa. You did the works of wonders, man," Wendy said chuckling as she entered the scene, handing a glass of water to Lisa—as someone who once experienced the wrath of Irene, she must admit that she was surprised. Irene never showed her anger on her sleeves, she was just either keeping her calm and patience or she just simply ignored your existence, so it was a surprise to her—to all of them, that Irene could manage to get that mad she failed to manage her composure.
Embarrassing could not even begin to describe what she was feeling at the moment because after Irene left, Lisa found out that the scene she made with Irene was not only seen by Suho's manager and hers but also by the rest of the Red Velvet members who just arrived at their dorm in the most unparalleled perfect timing. They just managed to muster their courage up to get off their van once Irene left because not even the four of them had ever seen Irene speaking so loudly that it cut through the doors and windows of their van.
Hence there they were all at Red Velvet's dorm after they convinced Lisa's manager to just leave the girl with them, which he agreed on but he told them that he would bring Jennie there as well. However, Seulgi asked him to bring Jisoo instead, the woman had probably read all her messages about the occasion by then.
Seulgi and Wendy looked calm as they tried to comfort Lisa. The woman probably wanted to bury her head by then after creating such a scene. It was a good thing that the basement was empty; there were just Red Velvet's van, Suho's, and Lisa's, so they could rest easy that there would not be any news featuring Irene, Suho, and Lisa on the front page. Joy and Yeri were quick on their feet and brains too as they immediately connected the puzzle between Lisa and Irene, although they were not a hundred percent sure about the real connection between them because there was Suho too, but at least they were aware that it had something to do with that phone call Irene made in LA that almost ended up with them holding a memorial for Irene's phone because she was speaking so harshly to the person on the end of the line.
"I'm sorry for making such a ruckus."
"It is what it is," Seulgi who just got back from her room walked towards Lisa as she tried to console the younger. She handed her clothes over to Lisa who comically enough was still in her coat-turned-dress one piece, "You should change first," Seulgi suggested.
Lisa weakly nodded and thanked the older as she made her way to the bathroom. She was staring at the mirror, seeing her face—her tired tired face. Her mascara was smudged and it came to decorate the corner of her eyes instead, her lipstick was fading, and she looked a mess.
She was a blithering fool.
Whatever happened to decency and common sense?!
She scolded herself, she even cursed. Then that she had found a space in which only she existed, Lisa wanted to lock herself in the bathroom and never came out ever again. She wished she could touch the mirror and let it suck her into nothingness, much like a black hole. She needed a black hole.
How could she possibly face the four women outside the door?
"Hey, Lisa," a gentle voice along with gentle knocks on the bathroom door snapped her out of her panic, "You can use my cleanser and face wash; they're ones on the right top shelf," Lisa could hear Joy's voice from outside. Out of all the members of Red Velvet, Joy was the one she rarely met—mostly due to her hectic schedule. Joy had always been the closest to Chaeyoung though, so she knew Joy was a good person and hearing Joy's voice somehow calmed her down so she was thankful, after all, it was as Seulgi said, 'It is what it is,' there was nothing she could do then the deed had been done. Lisa quickly cleaned herself up, changed her clothes, and stepped out of the bathroom after bracing herself for bottomless questions from Irene's members, they could be pretty possessive about their eldest, she believed.
But she was met with silence instead.
"Seungwan Eonni is making ramyeon, eonni, you haven't had anything, have you?" It was the youngest Yeri who broke the silence for her when she saw Lisa was out of the bathroom. She gestured the fellow maknae of their respective groups to sit next to her on the couch as the TV was playing The Umbrella Academy, she had yet to finish the series. It was a good thing since it took her mind off of things for a while sitting there with Yeri.
"Incoming!"
It was not long before Wendy's excited voice was heard making its way from the kitchen, with puffing pot in her hands, Wendy quickly headed towards the dining table that was close to where Lisa and Yeri were sitting and it was as if an automatic cue, Seulgi and Joy scattered out of each of their rooms heading to the dining table as well.
They all sat together slurping Wendy's hot ramyeon, minding their own business. Lisa watched the scene before her eyes for a minute before she ate her portion as well. She was grateful that none of the four women mentioned anything about what happened and just went about their own matters. It was as if they were also giving her space to think things through and if possible, figure out what it was she wanted.
Although to be completely truthful, she also did not know what she wanted.
Being with Jennie was an unquestionable matter but seeing Irene with someone else made her heart raging with an unexplainable storm and it boiled her blood that she could not control herself from an unavoidable ugly explosion.
She had never felt such a thing and she also had never acted as irrationally as she did earlier.
What had Irene Bae done to her?
They were cleaning the dining table after their meal when the intercom rang, telling them someone was outside their door.
Lisa's cavalry had arrived at their doorstep.
"I'm here to pick up our idiot maknae," Jisoo announced when Seulgi opened the door. They smiled at each other meaningfully but they knew better as they restrained themselves from jumping on each other. Seulgi made a way for Jisoo to enter Red Velvet's abode and as soon as Jisoo stepped into their dorm, she took her widest steps reaching for their youngest, actually scolding her.
"Yah! Lisa, you idiot! Are you out of your mind?"
"I'm sorry, eonni. I don't know what I was thinking either."
Jisoo addressed her apology and gratitude for Red Velvet's understanding and hospitality. She looked like a mother who was picking her daughter up from school after being summoned to the principal's office for fighting.
Oh, Lisa.
"I'm sorry for my irrational behaviour and thank you for having me," Lisa bowed 90 degrees to Seulgi, Wendy, Joy, and Yeri who had been so kind to let her spend some time in their dorm when Jisoo and she were about to head back to their dorm.
"Lisa, a little bit of advice before you go," Seulgi cut her, it looked like it was something important. Lisa knew at that moment, that it was not the question she should worry about. It was that. "If you like our eonni, you fight for her, not with her," Seulgi lightly said.
"If you don't like our eonni, don't bother fighting her at all," Wendy continued with a piece of her own advice.
"We like you, but we love our eonni, just this once we let you do what you did, the next time it happens, we'll step on the gas of our van instead and run you over," it was Joy's turn, even that particularly unrecognised daughter of Irene decided to butt in. Joy was bubbly, lovely, and bright. She did not look like she could hurt a fly but at that moment, even her smile could no longer cover her savagery. She gave out a light chuckle but it was clear that the woman was not trying to be funny.
"Arrasseo, eonni?" That time it was Yeri, who smiled so cutely, but it was evident that beneath that smile, a threatening smirk was concealed.
Lisa was shaking in her shoes but she knew she was at fault. While Jisoo could only pray for the well-being of their maknae.
It served Lisa right.
On their silent way home, Jisoo stared at Lisa who had her gaze thrown outside the window. The bright lights from the streets took turns leaving light shades on Lisa's skin. Jisoo did not know how to approach the youngest and told her that she should make her mind up or how to tell her simply that she had fallen for Irene. She did not know how to, so instead she asked the most obvious question.
"What happened to you?"
Lisa was drawn back as if her soul had left her body and only by Jisoo's voice that she found her way back to the realm of reality.
"I have no idea. I—I don't think I was even thinking, eonni but I don't think I fancy the idea of Irene Eonni being with someone else."
Oh, boy.
It was clear to her then, about what Seulgi said—that was. The feline eyed was right about Lisa loving the eldest member of Red Velvet. There was only one explanation and the dense Lisa apparently was not aware of it.
"Lisa, it's called jealousy," Jisoo sighed to Lisa's widened eyes. It looked like the woman did not believe her words or failed to fathom the meaning of her words, at that point Jisoo could no longer tell, by that time it seemed like Lisa had a hopeless immeasurable sappiness. So she repeated herself to explain the situation to Lisa in the clearest manner one could possibly do.
"You're jealous, Lisa."