January 8th, 2018
After spending four days in the infirmary, like always with Ieiri's care, she finally allowed Haku to move around. The first thing they wanted to do, as always, was sit in the zen garden. As they approached the entrance, a familiar feeling spread through their chest and Haku's pace quickened from a leisurely stroll to an urgent jog. It was a feeling so unmistakable, but Haku still wanted to confirm it with their eyes.
As they rushed through the entrance to the garden, there in the grass beside the pond, Yuta sat gazing out across the glassy surface. The rustle and crack of dead leaves gave away Haku's presence as Yuta turned to look at the entrance, eyes lifting with surprise the moment the two met each other's line of sight.
With a gentle beaconing wave, Yuta signaled for Haku to join him; which they happily obliged. Haku rushed over quickly in a hurry like Yuta would suddenly disappear if they didn't move with haste.
"Slow down Haku! You'll hurt yourself again!" Yuta called out, worried that Haku's injuries haven't fully healed yet.
Haku took a seat beside Yuta as they shook thejr head, "I'm fine. Ieiri Sensei let me go. I only occasionally get dizzy since I had a concussion apparently."
"And a fractured skull," Yuta scolded gently.
Haku nodded. The two sat in the rare mid-afternoon sunlight of winter. It was a calming sensation to feel the brisk chill of the frosted wind as it glided across their skin mixed with the warmth of the sunlight rays they sat beneath. A pleasant balance of both feelings in January. The blades of grass they sat in were glistening; dew drops adorned each as Haku brushed their fingertips across the surface of the ground.
As time passed, the unspoken elephant of the room only grew larger as Haku took a deep breath, "You're really leaving for Africa?" they asked. Although Haku knew the answer, they still wanted to hear that clarification one last time, clinging onto the hope that maybe they're mistaken.
However Yuta let out a sigh, "Yeah... tomorrow."
"I won't forgive you." Haku blurted out suddenly, catching Yuta off guard.
It was something so quick and spoken with seriousness; although much of what Haku said often lacked a subtle delicacy. Yuta snapped his head to look at Haku with surprise, "Wha—Why?"
"Because I'm selfish," Haku responded in that same tactful manner. Though, this time it was clearer to Yuta that Haku might be joking; he still wasn't sure.
Yuta let out a small laugh, since that was something unlike anything Haku has ever said before. "I've gotta work hard if I want to be able to stand beside all of you again," he spoke hopefully.
Haku was partially occupied with scanning the ground for a sizeable pebble when they spoke without thinking, "Yeah but if you were here, I could kick your ass no problem in training everyday."
This time, Yuta couldn't help it and laughed as he needed to steady himself by leaning his weight back on his hands in the grass behind him, "You could do that even before I lifted Rika's curse."
Haku shrugged, still in search of that pebble to skip across the water's surface, "I'd say it was a 50/50 chance."
This confident attitude was new for Haku and Yuta couldn't help but watch them in wonder, "That's exactly why I'm gonna train— I'll train so hard that when I come back we're having a rematch on-spot. If I win, you're doing all the chores for six months."
"I already do all the chores," Haku snapped back; whipping their head to look at Yuta who successfully gained all of Haku's attention now.
"I would do them if I lose," Yuta offered.
Haku stared deep into Yuta's eyes as they kept their tone as flat as possible, "How enticing," spoken lacking any sort of emotion.
Yuta smiled, this was the Haku he knew. Their attention once again returned to skimming the surface of the grass as Yuta watched, "Haku," he called out.
Haku voiced a small sound of confirmation that they were indeed still listening, even if they weren't looking directly at Yuta.
"When I'm gone, take care of the new first-years for me. I trust you," he said seriously this time.
In a split second, Haku tilted their head in Yuta's direction with an expression so taken aback.
"Don't be disgusted!" Yuta playfully scolded, reaching out an arm to gently slap Haku's shoulder. "I'm entrusting this to you because I know you're strong enough to protect them no matter what. Do this for me, promise?"
Yuta held up his pinky, just like a few days ago in the infirmary when Yuta also made Haku promise to stay alive no matter what. And just like then, Haku stared at Yuta's hand for a few moments before hesitantly holding up their hand to interlock their pinkies together; sealing another promise between them.
The two dropped their hands as Haku looked out across the water, "I promise. I also promise that I'll become even stronger too. I'll be the one to save you one day— I've made a vow to myself."
With his kind eyes that first gave Haku reassurance, Yuta smiled warmly, "Looks like we both have things to improve upon. I look forward to it."
It was that same smile that helped Haku recall a memory of the past, "That night... when you first came to the garden. We talked a lot."
"Yeah..." Yuta trailed off, also remembering that night from many months ago now. "I'm still grateful that I took a walk that night and stumbled upon you."
Haku hugged their knees to their chest, resting their chin upon the newfound surface as they quietly whispered, "I knew you were coming and normally I would've run away, but that night I didn't."
"If I remember right," Yuta recalled with a mellow air, "You said you wanted to talk to me because I was strange to you."
"You still are," Haku blurted out at a normal volume.
"Hey!"
"It's not a bad thing," Haku corrected. "You're everything I'm not, of course I'd find it strange."
Yuta gave Haku a questioning glance, "How am I everything you're not. I think you're quite amazing."
To find the right words were a difficult task. There were many things Haku wanted to describe but all of them lacked the sincerity to reflect their reasoning. Hoping they'd find the words along the way, Haku began to ramble, "You're selfless; you care about people— you can find love and joy in things, smile so easily. You're adept at anything you set your mind to; of course I find it unsettling."
"I wasn't always that way," Yuta humbly disagreed. "It took a lot for me to overcome my limits and accept every part of myself. I think you're just more cautious than I am and that's not terrible. You care about the things that matter to you, like Shiro— and us. That's a certain kind of love."
Something in Haku's eyes dulled, almost drooping as they fiddled with their fingers, preoccupied in their thoughts, "That's not a word I can use so loosely."
Yuta immediately noticed the change in mood of Haku's demeanor. Haku wasn't someone to outwardly express their emotions, but that didn't make them a cold-hearted person. It just took a careful eye to notice the small changes; something Yuta was well-practiced in by now having spent a considerable amount of time intentionally taking notice of things like this to truly understand Haku. Something changed, something was bothering them and Yuta remembered that this was the same expression Haku wore that night as well when talking about a certain topic.
If there was ever a time to ask, it had to be now. Yuta drew in a deep breath, "Before I leave, there is something I've been meaning to ask you for a while; I just wasn't sure when a good time would be to bring it up."
Haku kept to themself, but nodded as if to say, 'Go ahead'.
It was the only green-light of clearance Yuta would receive so he decided to take it, "When you told me to just call you 'Haku' because your full name is a bit strange to hear, why exactly is that? I know about your childhood memory, but you said that was only a part of the reason. When we talked that night, you looked rather sad thinking about it— you had the same expression as the one you're making now."
"Ah..." Haku sighed, finally coming back to the present and regaining the life in their eyes once again. "I guess if it's you, I don't mind talking about it..." they trailed off, mustering up the courage to verbally state the reason.
"Selfishly, it was another reason I didn't run away from you that night," Haku admitted.
Yuta would never describe Haku as a 'selfish' person, but this is the second time they've used that word to describe themselves today. He found it an odd choice of wording, but decided not to comment on it for now. Rather, he gave Haku all the time they needed to collect their thoughts in peace.
Much to Yuta's surprise, a faint trace of a smile graced Haku's lips. "My first love as a kid isn't with me anymore either— she's not dead, but I have no way to find her again. Her name was Chihiro and we were only together for one summer. But I think, in the greatest capacity a child can, I really did cherish her," spoken with the sincerest of reverence, Haku's eyes warmed to a degree Yuta had never seen before.
Haku hugged their knees tighter as they balled their fists tightly— tight enough that the bones in their knuckles were prominently showing, "She was the only person who insisted on calling me by my full name. She made it something I wanted to hear again; since I had forgotten how nice it could be to hear my proper name back then."
"You're finally speaking to me casually," Yuta smiled.
Haku snapped out of their dazed state, "Eh-?" they asked, uncertain what Yuta meant.
"Just now," Yuta noted. "When you were thinking about Chihiro, you spoke casually lost in your memories. It's nice to see a new side of you."
"Tell anyone and you won't live to see tomorrow," Haku threatened with an expression that they were absolutely serious.
Despite their harsh warning, Yuta only found it amusing that this is what Haku looks like when they're embarrassed, "We're finally closer, I'm glad."
Haku sighed, visibly relaxing the tension they held in their body. Having quickly given up the 'threatening act' after seeing Yuta's friendly smile, "Only because it's you."
"And sadly I'm leaving," Yuta said just to rub salt in the wound.
"That just means you'll have to come back faster," Haku reasoned.
Yuta raised an eyebrow as he teased, "Are you sure that'll leave you with enough time to get stronger yourself? I plan to come back better than before."
"I'll make you regret ever leaving," having taken the bait, Haku retorted with a definite attitude.
Their conversation of the moment quieted as the two sat in the ambience of the surrounding nature. The rustling of the leaves as the chilled winter breeze billowed through them and the scuffling of small animals as they rattled the branches of the bushes. They were quiet sounds that are only amplified when everything else is subtracted from the scene. The sounds may be quiet but they had no problem filling the air as Yuta and Haku relaxed in each other's company as if this were any other day.
The grass the two sat on sparkled with silvery dew drops. Seizing the opportune, carefree atmosphere, Haku leaned back to lay on their back. Their eyes closed as the sun's rays casted a gentle glow on their face. A sight of tranquility, Yuta noted as Haku continued to lay there unbothered in the garden of nature.
Haku's chest rose and fell with a steady rhythm as they opened their eyes once again; a reassurance that they hadn't fallen asleep given how peaceful they looked. They took a deep breath that showed as their lungs filled with a significant amount of air. Haku exhaled just a deeply, "It's funny how you wake up each day and never really know if it will be the one to change your life forever."
Haku spoke so quietly, Yuta almost didn't catch every word. They turned their head to look at Yuta from their angle close to the ground, "When I walked home that day, if I would've known that I would be attacked by three cursed spirits— I might've taken a different way home."
"That probably wouldn't have changed anything," Yuta pointed out.
The two shared a laugh, possibly scaring the animals in the close vicinity.
"You're right," Haku agreed, looking up at the sky. "I think that's something the 'me' of the past would've said. Now that I've experienced everything that I have now; the pain, the suffering, the happiness, the laughter, knowing the true blessing of what it means to be alive— I don't think I would trade this, despite not knowing when I wake up in the morning if today will be my last."
A heavy topic brought up with unknown origins. Though unbeknownst to Yuta, this was something that weighed heavily on Haku's mind since regaining Master Tengen's memories and learning the true fate of the White Dragon. It used to be something that terrified them; the absolute certainty of the prophecy engraved in their mind with clarity. However, as the time passed, Haku began to think of it with a different mindset after seeing their friends risking their lives for the sake of others.
"Before..." Haku continued as they rambled from the depths of their inner turmoil, "I had no idea what it meant to die; it was just a convenient excuse to run away. Now that I've experienced my closest encounter to death, I can honestly fight with earnest sincerity since I haven't fully made my peace if I were to die right now. Everyday... I'm not just fighting to find a reason to live anymore; I'm also striving to make my peace for when I meet my fate at the end of it all." Haku's voice was vague as well as their last statement, but Yuta understood what they meant by it.
Haku drew another deep breath as they sat up once again. Their back was speckled with damp spots from the dew drops of the grass, but they didn't seem to mind. Haku turned their head to look Yuta in the eyes, "Promise me one thing Yuta."
"What's that?" Yuta asked, highly curious since Haku had never asked for anything before.
From always floating aimlessly in the air surrounding Haku, a gently white hazy glow descended in front of Yuta's face as Haku pointed, "Will you take Shiro with you?"
"Me?" with wide eyes, Yuta asked. The shikigami bobbled up and down as Yuta held out a hand which Shiro gently rested upon. "You would really let me take Shiro?"
Haku nodded and this made a warm feeling spread throughout Yuta's chest as he grinned happily. His glance bounced between the paper doll spirit and his friend that sat just a short distance away. "Thank you Haku. I'll take good care of Shiro."
"It would make me feel more at ease," they admitted, watching Yuta and Shiro interact.
"Kohakuchan!"
A voice called out from the zen garden's entrance, a voice belonging to someone that absolutely did not make anyone feel more at ease. Yuta and Haku turned to see Gojo casually strolling towards them with an envelope in hand that he waved about.
"Something just came in— a mission request that I think will be perfect for you," Gojo proudly beamed, thrusting the envelope in Haku's face; to which they swatted away.
Haku merely gave Gojo a suspicious look, refusing to say anything. Yuta reached out and took the letter in Haku's place as he asked, "What is it?"
Gojo rested his hand in his hip as his weight leaned to one side, slightly distraught that Haku refused to accept the letter, "Our school has a partnership with a detective agency one town over in Yokohama. They've put in a request for the aid of a Semi-Grade 1 or above sorcerer to help them disband and imprison a gang of mafia curse users."
"Why Haku?" Yuta questioned, still unsure as to how this would be something perfectly suited to them.
Gojo beamed as if this was the question he had been waiting for all along, "Because that detective agency has a special fellow I think Kohakuchan should meet. I think you would learn quite a bit from him since you two are somewhat similar."
Haku still gave Gojo a look of indifference to the subject. From their expression, it seemed as if no words had peaked their interest whatsoever in that explanation.
"It's a six month mission request. I have to send a reply by tonight— think it over," Gojo added and with that, he took his leave.
The two students sat alone in the garden once again. Yuta opened the already torn envelope and his eyes scanned the letter inside containing the mission's details. "Looks like we'll both be busy for the time being," he said, still reading the document.
"Six months..." Haku held up their hands, counting on each finger, "I wouldn't come back until July..." they realized. Their eyes grew as they gave Yuta a worried glance.
He seemed to understand what Haku meant by that; Haku worried they would miss Yuta's return. To quiet their concern, Yuta held out the letter for Haku to take as he gave a bit of encouragement, "And who knows when I'll be back. Just go for it."
Haku shoved Yuta's shoulder playfully, causing him to drop the letter, "You're unhelpful."
"Hey hey!" Yuta laughed, reaching to grab the envelope. Once again he held it up for Haku to take, and thankfully they did this time. "The organization requested a Semi-Grade 1 sorcerer or above, that means this is something dangerous. So just remember your initial promise to me and I'll see you soon."
"You're acting like I already accepted it," Haku dismissed, removing the letter to read it's contents for themself.
Yuta tilted his head, "Haven't you?"
He had it figured given Haku's playful shove from earlier. When normally, if Haku felt that strongly about not doing something, they would've just turned away.
"When did you come to know me so well?" Haku asked, furrowing their brows in confusion.
Yuta smiled as they scooted over closer to wrap an arm around Haku's shoulders, "Just call me your best friend then."
☁︎ ┆ A U T H O R' S N O T E
sorry for misleading some of you in chapter 22 that the book would be ending there. i probably shouldn't have used the word 'epilogue'. i also mislead some of you into thinking yuta and haku wouldn't have another interaction. this is actually their last heart-to-heart talk for a while :(
but on a brighter note, who's ready to start seeing Haku Senpai ?
they grow up so fast. ;~;
just how fast the night, changes...