"Pass the Bread Demitra" Calliope asks and her sister one year younger does just that.
Demitra is fairer than Calliope and Teddy, she has green eyes and blonde hair, that of her grandmother Maria tells me, but she is just as loud as the rest of the clan, including Thea who is twelve and equally as fair but with their parents darker brown eyes.
The Nomikos table was always full, not a chair left in the house that wasn't pulled up to it. Emma and I were sat on the uncomfortable garden chairs among a sea of Nomikos, young, old and the in between. There were twenty or so, loud and fast speaking family. Emma and I couldn't understand a word of anything.
I spoon some Stifado into my mouth and practically moan at the taste. "There will be some for Mary too" Maria calls over the crowd, smiling at me widely, before returning to her conversation with her sister. She knew my aunts loved her food, we frequented their restaurant regularly, which was slightly awkward now that I worked there. They would often turn up on date nights, on my shift days, and enjoy teasing me about it as I took their order.
Emma placed her hand next to mine on the table. I hesitated a little at the way her little finger brushed my hand.
Was that an accident, I considered, as I swallowed my mouthful. I looked up from her hand to find Calliope opposite me looking at me teasingly from behind her glass
I return the look as Teddy jumps onto my lap "can I sit here Willa" she asks.
I nod "of course Ted" i return, and I take a sip of my drink.
Emma leans in, her light strawberry blonde hair falling over my shoulder. "what's in this" she asks me, pointing at a dish in the middle of the table that bubbles at the edges of a white serving plate.
"It's a dead lamb" Teddy informs her matter of factly.
Emma frowns "oh" she says grimacing and dropping the serving spoon back into it.
"What an enticing description Theodora" I reply, holding her upon my lap as she traced her little hands over my arm. "Perhaps work on that descriptive delivery before you join the restaurant as wait staff"
Emma laughs, it is loud and takes her by surprise. She places her hand over her mouth to hide it. I find myself turn and smile at her, a slight surprised smile of my own, she was cute... oh she was cute... damn it.
***
"Kalinikta Willa and Emma" Maria called.
Calliope opened the front door for us "Goodnight Maria" I call back, before turning back to Calliope with my hands full of foil covered foods for Erica and Mary.
"Tomorrow... court three at two p.m...be there Jameson to have your butt thrashed..."
"Oh I will be there... to thrash yours" i rebuff and I walk out onto the front path, with Emma and Calliope whispering behind me. I flip around and glare at them suspiciously "what is this" I ask, pointing between them and waving my finger about.
Emma turns, and I catch sight of a grin she soon hides as she walks towards me. Her short mustard coloured sun dress is bellowing out in the breeze, revealing far too much thigh. I draw my eyes away, chastising myself internally for the inappropriate way they had taken in her beautiful figure.
"Saw that" Calliope calls.
I throw up a middle finger and cock an eyebrow "see you tomorrow" I return matter of factly.
"Don't do anything I wouldn't do" she calls again as we walk side by side to the small car that Mary and Erica had let me borrow from them. Mary didn't much like driving, so she had been quite happy to make me her personal chauffeur whilst I wasn't busy. I had needed the driving practice, and in return, I could have the car.
I place the food on the backseat and get into the drivers side, starting the car and watching Emma buckle up before we headed to her house, ten minutes away.
"I love Calliopes family" Emma says, filling the silence.
"Me too" i return, concentrating on the road.
"Do you have a big family" she asks me, and with such an innocent question comes a tonne of weight upon my shoulders, almost like for a second I couldn't breath to think of them.
"I..." I begin stuttering a little and I sense her eyes fall upon me like she's realised I am chocked up.
"Oh Willa I'm sorry" she says placing her hand on my arm briefly. "Forget I asked... please" she adds worriedly.
"No it's okay" I begin. "I'm sorry I just try not to think of them, it's a coping mechanism, but
It doesn't work too well... evidently" I say sarcastically. "I have four brothers and a sister" I finally answer.
"Gosh that's a lot" she acknowledges.
"And you" I ask, trying to deflect the question.
"A brother" she declares. "He's at college. I'm the only one left at home with my mom... she works at the local care facility. In fact she's there now, so Callie saved me tonight from having dinner alone again"
"Me too. Erica and Mary are at an art show in town" I say pulling up to Emma's front yard.
"Come in" she asks me "if you are only going home to be alone anyway... then come in" she asks "we can keep each other company for a while"
"Okay" I say unsure. I honestly didn't know if it was a good idea, Emma clearly had an interest here, with me. Callie had told me all about it, but I had so much baggage. I didn't want to start something new, not when I wasn't ready. I certainly didn't want to get anyones heart involved with mine, not when I didn't have it to give away, my heart still beat far from me... miles upon miles away in the hands of Alberta Anderson.... Or should I say Jameson? No, I can't bring myself to ever think of her this way, no matter how childish that may sound.
***
Emma's house is small like Mary and Ericas, quite modest, it has an open planned lounge and kitchen with a hallway to the rear, leading to three small bedrooms. Emma hands me a soda and pats the couch beside her as she sits down and removes her short cut leather jacket. "I am so happy we can finally hang out" she says. She clicks a button and music begins to play from the speakers on the wall. A soft melody of a popular love song.... Uh oh... here we go. I place the drink down beside me on the coffee table.
"Willa" she asks, turning to me and allowing herself a moment to look into my eyes. I find myself smiling at her upturned lips, she licks them involuntarily and my eyes dip there, to the pinked flesh, her Cupid's bow lifting, allowing a dip to form below her nose.
My goodness she was cute. "Emma" I return, almost jovially.
She looks like she is holding back a laugh. "I can't do it" she squeals, standing up and pulling away from me.
I frown and laugh at the way she is dancing about and feeling awkward "what on earth are you doing" I ask her.
She looks back at me and holds her hand out, gesturing to me "Willa, I really like you" she admits.
I swallow a little as she sits back down, removing her black doc martins, her white socks that had been rolled cutely above them revealed as she tossed the boots aside, crossing her bare legs beside me and sitting like a five year old does on the school mat at reading time.
I glance down at her, inhaling a little apprehensively at her closeness and the muscle definition of her legs. Oh god. "Willa... may I kiss you" she asks me.
I don't know what to say, because I couldn't say yes, not yet, I wasn't ready for my first attempt at a relationship. "I don't want anything serious" she suddenly says as if she is reading my mind "I know you aren't ready for that" she confirms, and her heart is beating fast, her sun dress moving with it, the buttons barely holding the dress together over her breasts. They are already strained a little, the buttons threatening to pop open with one more anxious thrust of her rib cage, revealing her bra beneath it.
Oh god she was so cute, her apprehensive stare, her eyes searching mine, dipping to my lips. My lips moisten with a slight run of my tongue over them "okay" I almost squeak.
She smiles softly, relieved, her hands cup my cheeks gently, her amber eyes crease with the relieved smile and she leans forward, her eyes closing as mine do, and her lips capture mine, softly. A strange sensation washes over me, to kiss a girl other than Allie, but the kiss, it is warm and soft, a rush of blood to my cheeks, my body tingling with the way her lips slip into mine and discover me. It isn't Emma though that my mind wonders to, it is Alberta, and I try and pull away with the realisation but Emma holds me closer, her kiss deepens and a heat washes down my torso, the urge to reach out and touch her, it intensifies and my hands fumble from my lap and place either side of her waist. She moans a little at the contact, and I pull away instantly. The guilt hits full force, this was not Allie...
"Are you okay" she asks me as she sits taller, a little surprised at my sudden release of her.
"I think I need to go" I say standing and collecting my jacket from beside the couch.
"I'm sorry" I apologise.
She looks a little disappointed.
"Tomorrow... will I see you tomorrow" I ask.
She smiles "if you want to" she asks me.
She has put it right back in my court, the ball placed in my hands. I take a deep breath "I do" I answer honestly. I couldn't run forever from living my life. I had to commit to this new life and let myself be free to explore everything that it had to offer. Life couldn't be about Alberta anymore...
***
I close my eyes to kiss a girl
I like her, I do
but in the dark I find there,
visions of you,
years can pass by us
but each freckle on your cheek,
I see and know each one
Ivory laced
freckle faced
Lips that lift as my eyes trace
I close my eyes to kiss a girl
But
She always morphs into you