LILIANNA'S POV
I shove open the glass door lined with too many drink posters with expired deals. I'm sure we don't even sell half of the liquor advertised on them but neither Jeremy nor myself can be bothered taking them down so up they stay. They match the ones now lining the windows which are also about to expire.
"Did Kate drive you?" Jeremy asks as soon as I enter the store for my shift. He leans behind the counter to try look out the small gap in the window to the parking lot.
"No, some guy name Davi did." I answer honestly, simultaneously dashing Jeremy's hopes of seeing his beloved Kate. I'm actually sure her name was Kay but he insists it was Kate. She was my Uber driver to work last week and Jeremy found her rather attractive. So every time I Uber to work, which is every day I'm working as I no longer have a car, Jeremy checks if Kay - I mean Kate - drove me. I wonder what he'll even do if I said she did. Probably nothing but stare at her out the window or try talk her ear off for five minutes like he did the day she drove me.
"You know those rides to work may seem cheap day to day," Jeremy begins as I round the counter and pull out the green pinafore, tying it around my waist and mouthing the rest of Jeremy's sentence in perfect timing, my back to him so he can't see me mimicking his words.
"But over time those trips add up." He says, like he does at the start of all my shifts recently.
"Yeah well, I don't have a car anymore and I'm not so keen on driving yet. I don't know if you know this but the last time I drove a car it didn't end so well for me." I remind him sarcastically.
"Oh don't be so cynical Lily. You're focusing on the wrong thing here." Jeremy says and I turn around to face him. His ageing blue eyes dance with humour and I take the bait.
"Oh really?" I cross my arms waiting for the punchline buried somewhere in his words.
"Yes, its not the driving that didn't go so well for you. It's that shitty eyesight you've got, I'm not even surprised you drove into a bloody truck. You've been working here how long and still can't see the damn time on my clock." He points to it, a smirk tugging at his lips.
"You were meant to start five minutes ago." Jeremy teases and I roll my eyes but chuckle at his dark humour.
"Now stop slacking and get to work. I haven't unpacked yesterday's stock." He adjusts the baseball cap on his head and moves to serve a customer behind me at the counter as I swan myself out to the back to unpack and shelve the new delivery.
Jeremy leaves me to manage the shop about twenty minutes later and returns just before nine at night as usual. The majority of my shift is quiet but the few customers begin to pick up the later it gets. My ride is late so I stay behind the counter and help Jeremy serve the handful of customers that have come in.
When Mesha, who is almost ten minutes late in picking me up, doesn't show up I almost consider texting her but she pushes her way through the glass doors just before I can.
Her long curly hair is tied into a large messy bun at the top of her head. Her small arms are swallowed in an oversized white t-shirt and black spandex tights cover her legs. She must've just come from school, the only place Mesha doesn't dress up.
"Sorry I'm late, my tutor got on his high horse and overran our night class by almost twenty minutes." She apologises as I pull the drawstrings from my waist and remove my work apron.
"Do you need an eye test too?" Jeremy asks Mesha as he walks in from the back drying his hands on his blue flannel.
Mesha raises an eyebrow confused by his comment and I give a breath of laugh and shake my head at her. Giving her an, "I'll explain later," kind of look.
"Actually Jer, my eyes are good. Twenty twenty vision over here." Mesha steps further into the store, gravitating to the magazine stand as she does. I fold and tuck my green apron under the front counter as Mesha and Jeremy continue their banter back and forth.
"Y'know, you should probably order in those nuddy magazines Jer. You'd probably make a killing selling those out of a place like this." Mesha speaks her mind as she selects a car magazine with women in bikinis washing them on the inside. She's probably right though, those car magazines sell well and the women aren't even naked.
"Why's that? You got your first cover deal or something?" Jeremy's quick to tease Mesha and she slaps the magazine closed and glares at Jeremy. Mock offence lingers on her face but we can both see the smile she's trying to fight.
"You're lucky you're an old man otherwise I'd throw hands over that. But I don't fight the elderly." Mesha gives it right back and Jeremy's smug grin drops.
"Hey, I'm not that old okay." His hand rise to his hips as Mesha snickers and returns the magazine to the stand.
"Of course not babe, fifty is the new forty." Mesha stokes, annoying Jeremy further which only makes it funnier.
"Whoa there, I'm only in my early forties!" Jeremy leans against the door frame as I walk round him to stand by Mesha, my tote bag slung over my shoulder.
"My bad." Mesha snorts and Jeremy rolls his eyes before disappearing back to the back, clearly finished his back and forth with Mesha. I'd say Mesha won that one, she definitely struck a nerve with the age thing.
The store bell sounds and Mesha and I turn to leave through it. She stops in her tracks as she looks to the door, her face pales slightly and I follow her wide eyed gaze to the customer who just entered the store.
My eyes take in the perfectly manicured and pressed navy blue suit. Shiny black dress shoes, gold watch peaking out from the wrist. The two gold rings on his left hand; one on his pinky, the other on his ring finger. Dark blonde facial hair, trimmed perfectly around his mouth, chin and jaw. Sandy blonde hair slicked back just as perfectly.
Crystal blue eyes meet mine and I feel as though I'm seeing a ghost.
Curby.
Curby is back in town, and standing just in the entrance of my work. By the way he has also stopped in his tracks at the sight of Mesha and I, guarded eyes flicking between the two of us, I gather he is unaware that I work here. He's just as caught off guard as we are.
No one says a word as we stay planted in our places on the shop floor. No one knows what to do and no one wants to make the first move either. A thought crosses my mind that has my knees slightly buckling. Is Seven with him?
The two of them use to go everywhere together and my heart begins to hit rapidly against my chest. Oh fuck. Oh fuck this is actually happening right now. Silently I reach for Mesha's hand, unsure of what to say or do. I've gone all hot and I feel as though the room is beginning to spin.
Oh fuck.
Am I about to faint?
Mesha's hold on my hand is right and reassuring helping me gain some balance back. Curby slowly steps forward, and then another step, cautiously approaching us both. I can't believe this is actually happening. I can't believe he's here. With all the confidence in the world, Curby sends me a warm smile and I don't understand why it relaxes me slightly. Only slightly though, I'm absolutely rigid with the anticipation of a certain someone else following in behind him.
"Hi." Curby greets me, as if he hadn't just disappeared for the last four and a half months. His blue eyes train to Mesha and I finally break my set stare to look over at my friend. I'm surprised at her own reaction, if anything I'd say she seems more panicked than shocked. Her face has lost some colour and I'm both worried and confused at the way her and Curby are staring at each other.
"What are you doing here?" Mesha finally speaks, I still can't find my voice.
"To get a drink." Curby motions around the store, that familiar flirtatious smile playing on his lips.
"Here out of all places? You know this is where she works." Mesha snaps at him, talking as if I'm not right next to her. To be quite frank I'm almost not sure if I even am here. My body is but my brain has completely disconnected itself. I stay silent, unable to remember how to speak.
"I didn't. I swear." Curby gives Mesha a look, a genuine one and I don't think I've seen him quite so serious before. She huffs as a response, believing him but unsure of how to handle the situation.
Why isn't she asking him about Seven? I want to know about Seven, Mesha. I want to say but I can't. Ask him how long he's in town for and when he arrived.
I glance at the door over Curby's shoulder, checking once again for Seven's arrival but no one else enters the store. With a glance to me then down to the floor Mesha says.
"Okay. Well we're leaving." She tugs on my arm. What? Why? She hasn't asked him about anything yet. This might be my only chance for some closure or answers on what happened to Seven but I'm completely missing it. My brain won't fucking work properly for me.
My feet are cement as Mesha begins to walk forward. Curby's eyes linger on her before flicking to me, then the floor, then back to me.
"I'll see you around." He says simply and walks off towards the fridges. Mesha notices me hesitating and tugs gently on my hand that she still holds.
"Lily?" Mesha asks when I still don't move, her head nods in the direction of the exit encouraging me but she must know I can't possibly leave. Curby is here, in town, in my fucking work. How is she so calm about this? How can she not understand that I'd have questions for him?
"Wait!" My voice sounds foreign and trapped in my throat but the single word is able to escape my mouth loud enough that it sounds over the music of the store.
"Lily." Mesha whisper at me in warning, pleading me not to do what I'm going to. But she has to know I would, she really thought I would just leave without speaking to him?
"Curby, wait!" I say again, this time my voice much clearer, stronger than what I feel inside. My body catches up with my voice and my feet unstick themselves from the hard lino of the store floor. They still feel heavy as I force myself to follow after Curby.
He turns to face me, a single refrigerated bottle of beer in his hand. The condensation drips over his sturdy fingers as he holds it, the cold drops drip to the floor. It's easier to focus on the bottle then those blue eyes as I approach.
"Lily!" Mesha calls from behind me worried.
"Where is he?" My voice is far more confident then I feel and I allow myself to look at his face.
"Is he back?" I ask not waiting for an answer to my first question. I feel Mesha next to me again and Curby's uneasy gaze goes straight to her.
Why does he keep looking at her? It's as if he needs reassurance or permission from Mesha to speak. I don't understand what the fuck is going on here.
Curby's blue eyes dart back to me and then to the beer in his hand.
"Answer me!" I demand.
"Come on Lil." Mesha says quietly next to me, her hands gently on my shoulders trying to direct me to turn around and leave. But I won't.
"No! No, I deserve some answers!" I yell at the pair of them. I'm annoyed that Mesha doesn't hold the same demands that I do. She was with me that night as we looked for Seven. She too seemed worried about him - well actually now that I think about it she seemed more worried about ... Curby.
I look between the two of them again, watching the way their eyes meet in private communication. Mesha looks at me, her face etched in guilt as she looks at me then glances back to Curby. My eyes catch the fading bruise on her neck. Like the last puzzle piece being put into place, the picture in front of me suddenly becomes complete.
Holy fuck.
"Oh my god." I step away from Mesha, her hands dropping from my shoulders. My eyes flick between the two of them accusingly and take another step back.
"He's who you've been fucking this whole time?" I point a finger at Curby while directing my line of fire at my best friend.
"Lily, I-" Mesha cuts herself off, seemingly unable to know what to say. She looks to Curby for back up which only confirms things further. I can't believe this.
"You were in contact with him this entire time?!" I can't help the anger boiling through my words. I can't believe this, Mesha and Curby?! What the actual—
"Please don't be mad at me." Mesha begs and Curby comes to stand by her side, his hand drifting to her back in comfort. It's a strange gesture to watch him do. Oh my god they really are together.
"How long? How long has this been going on?" I ask them both, my hand flying up to motion between them. The look on Mesha's face would usually hurt me to see, but as she glances up at her lover before answering, anger fires in me, preventing me from feeling sorry for the painfully guilty look on her face.
"Not long before they left." She admits now looking at the ground.
"And you didn't tell me? That night while we were looking for them you didn't say anything!" I feel hurt by her keeping secrets like this from me. The heat licks under my skin in a way I've never felt before. Betrayal. I feel betrayed by Mesha's dirty little secret.
"I couldn't! We couldn't tell anyone. I still work for them." Mesha's head shoots up as I shake mine, not taking that as an excuse.
"I told you about Seven and I while I worked in the club. I told you everything while you hid this from me. You saw how upset I was when they left, I was miserable for months Mesh, while you were off fucking him!" I jab another finger in Curby's direction.
"That's exactly why I didn't tell you! After your accident you weren't the same and I hated seeing you so upset! I thought if I had told you it would be giving you false hope. Seven didn't want to come back, he didn't want you and I thought it was best you forgot about him." Mesha is tearing up now but the anger is still bubbling under my skin, helping me ignore the way her tears make me feel.
The pang of both jealousy and hurt spring in my chest. Jealousy that Curby came back for her when Seven didn't for me and hurt from the brutal honesty of her words, "Seven didn't want to come back, he didn't want you." Mesha is right, I know she is. I just wish things were different.
My chest is rising up and down in anger and as I attempt to control the urge to cry. I don't want to cry, especially not in front of Curby.
"You should have told me." I revert back to the only thing I can hold Mesha accountable for.
"I know, I'm sorry I didn't. But I didn't want to hurt your feelings. I didn't want you to be reminded of him. You've been doing so well lately, there just never seemed to be the right time to tell you about us." She glances at Curby who has been incredibly quiet. I assume by the look on his face he finds this conversation incredibly uncomfortable, especially with both Mesha and I holding in our tears.
"Have you heard anything from him?" I ask her, I don't even need to say his name. She knows exactly who I am talking about. Yet again Mesha's face clouds with guilt as she frowns slightly, almost pleading me not to ask her this.
Has she heard from Seven? My heart rates picks up at the possibility. Surely she would tell me if she had. She's my best friend, she would tell me. Wouldn't she?
When Mesha doesn't answer and glances to Curby for the answer, I ask again.
"Mesha, have you heard from Seven?" I demand this time and Mesha's eyes begin to well up again.
"He," She hesitates as a tear spills down her cheek.
"He's in town. He asked me about you." She sniffs as yet another tear falls. My stomach drops at her words.
"He asked you?" I repeat.
"You've talked to him?!" I can't believe this. I can't believe she didn't tell me. That she probably never would have told me any of this if Curby hadn't unknowingly walked into my work place this afternoon.
Mesha sheepishly nods, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand and my anger returns. She's seen Seven. She's talked to him and didn't think to tell me about it. My mind races over the last few days; the person in the booth at the cafe, telling Mesha about it and her convincing me that I was probably just seeing things. I felt as though I was being watched and then at the book store...
It was him. It was all him and I wasn't imagining any of it. Seven is back in town and my best friend tried to hide that from me. I look at Mesha crying, Curby's hand rubbing at her back in comfort. How dare she cry? I'm not the one who lied and kept secrets from her. My anger continues to build.
"Get out." I say and Mesha shoots her head up to me from wiping her eyes.
"What?" She looks shocked and I shake my head at her.
"I said get out. Leave. Both of you." I point to the door.
"Lily-" Mesha tries to step forward but I move away from her, keeping a distance between us.
"Go." My voice is almost at a yell causing Jeremy to come through from the back.
"What's going on here?" He asks, coming to my aid.
"Make them leave." I almost beg and Jeremy frowns, confused at me ordering a crying Mesha out of the store.
"I think you should probably go." Jeremy says for me, his voice much softer than my own before stepping in front of me to usher both Mesha and Curby out.
"No, Lily please-" Mesha tries to step forward but Curby snakes his arm around her waist to stop her.
"Babe, let's just go. Let her calm down." He says quietly to her and if I weren't so angry, hearing him call her babe would shock me.
Jeremy walks them to the door as I stare at the spot where they once stood. I hear Curby explain that he still needs to pay for his drink but Jeremy tells him to just take it and go. Once they're gone my tears finally spill, my shoulders slump as a sob rocks through me. I feel hurt, betrayed, lied to. Why am I always left in the dark? My entire life has felt like the people closest to me have been keeping things from me. My grandmother would never tell me enough about my own parents, thinking she was protecting me from the hurt that memories of them would bring. Mesha has kept this from me, thinking she was protecting my feelings by doing so.
I'm never given the opportunity to decide what I want and don't want to know for myself. I'm sick of it, I'm sick of everyone thinking I need to be protected. I can handle myself, I can handle shit when given the opportunity, when given the truth.
"You okay, Lil?" Jeremy asks and I nod even though I'm still crying. It hurts, I love and trusted Mesha but she's done this. I know she did it in my best interests but she also knows how desperate I've been about the entire Seven situation.
After a few minutes I stop crying. Jeremy closes the store early and drives me home since Mesha had been my ride. I can't believe her and Curby are together, it both shocks me and doesn't at the same time. When I let myself in and flick the lights on my eyes catch the bright red decoration still on my living room window. I'm flushed with an emotion I don't quite understand; I feel embarrassed, angry even for doing what I did. Seven didn't want to come back, he didn't want you.
I drop my bag to the floor, grab a water bottle on my determined stalk towards the window. I pop the top of the water bottle and spray the water onto the window, my emotions are high as I angrily wipe my hand across the lipstick markings. Smudging them over the window creating more of a mess. The tears return as I try my best to clean it off, feeling defeated and upset by this afternoons proceedings.
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