CHAPTER 34
TRUTH
Iris' POV
"Irene..." He whispered that name as if something's pressing against his throat, blocking the air so he couldn't breathe. His face is tense and his eyes are opened wide.
I must be dreaming right now. There is no way he'd be here at my party. My subconscious part of the mind is thinking about him because of the closure we never had.
And I was honestly so convinced that he's just my imagination until someone accidentally bumped into him and he almost lost his balance, if it weren't for his luggage. It fell down and the loud sound woke my shocked mind.
Oh my gosh. Totoo nga! Nandito nga siya!
"Sorry pre----Uy Damian! You're back!!!"
Tiningnan lang siya ni David bago ito tumingin uli sa akin.
Did that guy just called him Damian?
"H-how are you here?" He asked as if I'm the one who doesn't belong in this place.
Hindi ko magawang makapagsalita. Talagang nanlalamig ang mga kamay at paa ko habang pinagmamasdan ang mukha niya.
My palms are sweaty and my knees are weak. I felt like my whole world is suddenly shaking.
"I can't believe it." Humakbang siya palapit sa akin kaya napahawak ako sa railing ng hagdanan. I took a step back and that quickly caught his sight.
He frowned and gazed at me with confused eyes.
"Aren't you happy to see me? Don't you remember me? I've looked for you, everywhere!" Ngumiti siya at umiling na tila hindi siya makapaniwalang nasa harapan niya ako ngayon. "Dito lang pala kita makikita. How did you know my house?"
His house?
My throat went dry upon hearing his words.
I feel like my head's going to explode.
"Irene---"
"You're not supposed to be here," I managed to speak, exhaling loudly.
Natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. "What do you mean?"
"You can't be here! You can't just show up after all these years! Not now! Not when everything's perfect in my life!" I started to panic to the point that I pushed him just so I can get away from him.
Tatakbo na sana ako palayo nang hawakan niya ang kamay ko. I glanced at him and was about to scowl him when someone spoke behind him.
"Hey!" I immediately pulled my hand away when I saw Dashiell running down the stairs. "Get your hands off my girl!" Paghawak niya sa braso ni David ay natigilan siya nang makita niya ang mukha nito. "Kuya? It's you!!! What the heck?!"
Bigla niya itong niyakap kaya naman sobrang naguluhan ako. Maski si David ay hindi nakaimik.
Magkakilala sila?
"When did you get here? Bakit biglaan? Anong meron?" excited na tanong ni Dash. "Does Dad know you're here?"
"Uhhh..." David was speechless. He couldn't even move.
What is happening? Why would Tito care if this guy's here?
"This is so f*cking great!!! Out of all the days you could have picked, you really chose a special day huh. So you went back to celebrate with us?"
David seemed to remember me so he looked at me again. Dash followed his gaze and smiled when he saw me.
Lumapit siya at umakbay sa akin. "You finally met my girlfriend."
"G-girlfriend?" gulat na tanong nito.
Dash kissed my cheek while my eyes remained on David. "Kuya, si Iris nga pala, ang babaeng nagpapasaya sa akin ngayon. My life, this is my older brother Damian, the person I look up to the most."
A-ANO? MAGKAPATID SILA?
Damian's POV
How can fate control me, make fun of me, and play with me as if I'm no one but a puppet in it's story?
This is so messed up.
My brother is dating the woman that I've been looking for all these years? You've got to be kidding me.
"So your name's Iris?" tanong ko kay Irene habang pinagmamasdan siyang subuan ni Dashiell ng pagkain. Naiilang niyang kinuha ang kutsara at sumubo bago tumango nang hindi tumitingin sa mga mata ko.
"Akala ko Irene pangalan mo?" I directly asked. Nasamid siya sa kinakain niya kaya naman todo alalay ang kapatid ko sa pagbigay ng tissue at tubig.
Umiwas ako ng tingin at kinalma ang sarili ko. I took a deep breathe and looked at her again.
"Who's Irene?" I demanded.
"That's her older sister," Dash explained. "In fact, she's just your age. Who knows you've seen her at one of our social gatherings."
What he said caught my attention. "What do you mean? Are they Elites?"
"Yup. Alam mo Kuya 'yung Sweets from Leona? Sa family nila 'yon."
Flashbacks entered my mind as I connected the dots.
There isn't any Irene name from the hotel records because there never was an Irene in Paris. She used her sister's name and that's basically the whole reason why I couldn't find her anywhere. Ang Irene na nalaman ng isa sa mga na-hire kong investigator ay ang Ate niya. Ang Irene na nakita ko sa party ni Silva ay ang kapatid niya.
I would have seen her if I knew her real name...
"I'm sorry Dash, masakit ang ulo ko dahil siguro sa byahe. I need to rest." Tumayo agad ako at tumingin uli kay Irene---Iris bago ako naglakad papunta sa garahe ng bahay namin.
I grabbed my car keys and drove as fast as I can till I could no longer handle my tears. Iginilid ko ang kotse sa daan at doon ko nilabas ang kanina ko pang pinipigilang mga emosyon.
I am so angry at her! Why did she lie about her name then leave without saying a proper goodbye? I know I did the same about my identity but atleast I waited for her at the lobby. I was ready to tell her everything! I was going to pursue her but she just ran away.
"Put*ngina talaga!!!" I shouted, gripping the steering wheel so tight.
I was this close into finding her but I didn't look hard enough. I gave up easily because I was losing hope and now she's Dashiell's. The woman I desperately wanted now belongs to my brother.
F*ck my life.
I grabbed my phone and called someone I know that is always available.
"Namo. Istorbo." And not even a single hello. Why am I not surprised?
"Nigel, I'm back. Tara inom."
"Dito ka na dumiretso kila Dash. May party kapatid mo dito sa bahay niyo---"
"I just left the house. I want to go somewhere else. Are you down?"
"Ok lang naman. Tamang tama, medyo nabo-bored na si Gio. Saan ba tayo?"
"Kahit saan."
I want to forget about Iris. I want to forget everything that I'm feeling right now. I want the rage, sorrow, regret and pain gone.
Dashiell's POV
"Pasensya ka na, mukhang hindi talaga maganda ang pakiramdam ni Kuya. He's not always like that. Mapangasar pa nga 'yon. Medyo seryoso lang siya ngayon kasi masakit nga daw ang ulo niya."
Iris nodded. "A-ayos lang."
"You okay? You look pale."
She forced herself to smile. "Just tired."
I squeezed her hand. "You can go upstairs and sleep. Ako na bahala sa mga bisita dito."
Napagpaalam ko naman na siya sa Mama niya. Her Mom's funny actually. Talagang todo payag siya nung humingi ako permiso na mag-overnight si Iris dito sa bahay namin.
I'm glad Tita likes me for her daughter. It makes things easier for me and my girlfriend.
"Uhmmm Dash, p-pwede bang umuwi na lang muna ako?"
"Huh? Bakit? It's totally fine with Tita if you stay here. Hindi naman ito 'yung first time na dito ka matutulog kaya---"
"Masyado lang kasing maingay at magulo..."
Tinitigan ko siya at mukhang seryoso nga talaga siya sa hiling niya. "Are you not feeling well?"
"Medyo. But I'm sure I'll be okay after I get some sleep."
"Sigurado ka? We can drop by the hospital if you want."
She stared at me and for some reason, her eyes got wet. Hinawakan niya ang pisngi ko at pinagmasdan ang mukha ko. "I love you, Dash. Sobra."
"I know, my life and I love you more." I smiled and kissed her. "Na-touch ka na naman na inaalagaan kita? Dapat nasasanay ka na. Habangbuhay kong gagawin ito."
She chuckled and wiped the tears that tried to escape her eyes. "Yeah, I hope so."
"Halika na. Hatid na kita pauwi."
I held her hands and we walked towards the garage. Gagamitin ko sana ang jeep ni Kuya nang mapansin kong wala iyon.
I thought he's going to rest but he left? Weird.
Inalalayan ko na sumakay si Iris sa kotse ko at nag-drive na ako. On my way out, I noticed Nigel's car leaving as well.
"Aga naman umuwi non." I mumbled.
"Hmmm?" Iris asked.
"Ah. Si Nigel, nakita kong paalis na rin. Maybe he's going to crash someone else's party."
Iris suddenly grabbed my right hand, held it and rested our hands on her lap. Nakatingin siya doon bago siya nagsalita.
"I'm really sorry, Dashiell."
"Sorry for what?"
She pursed her lips for a few seconds. "For..."
I frowned and glanced at her before I focused my eyes on the road. "Did you do something wrong? Why are you apologizing?"
"I really regret it."
Bigla akong kinabahan. "I don't understand."
"I'm just..." Huminga siya ng malalim. "I feel bad for leaving the party---our party. Anniversary pa naman natin pero..."
Natawa ako. "Akala ko naman kung ano." Iniangat ko ang magka-holding hands naming mga kamay at hinalikan iyon.
"Iris, loving me back this long is the greatest gift you have ever given me. Hangga't akin ka, masaya ako. Basta hindi mo ko iiwan, ayos lang na umuwi ka sa inyo nang maaga."
I thought she'll laugh but she didn't.
"I won't leave you Dash but you might."
"What are you talking about? Iris, hindi kita bibitawan, pangako 'yan."
She just rested her head on my shoulder and that worried me a lot.
"I don't know why you suddenly have these thoughts but I can assure you, I will be there on your side till the end. Maghihiwalay lang tayo kung ikaw ang magsasabi."
Iris' POV
"We're here." Dash kissed the top of my head. "Go inside and call me in the morning, okay?"
Umayos ako ng upo at inalis na ang seatbelt ko. I touched the car door but I couldn't get myself to open it.
Somehow, I started to feel scared.
What if he finds out about my past with his brother? Will he think I'm a slut? Will he leave me?
What if tomorrow, he'll ask to break up with me? Can I live without him?
"What is it?" He asked.
I bit my lower lip and shook my head. "Wala..."
"May gusto kang sabihin. Ano 'yon?"
I have so many questions in mind but I don't think Dashiell should give me the answers. After all, it's between me and David---Damian.
"Come on, tell me."
I sighed. "Dalawa lang talaga kayong magkapatid ng Kuya mo?"
"Yup. At least that's what I know," natatawang biro niya. "Bakit?"
Wow. Damian used a fake name? What for? Because he doesn't trust me at all? I also did the same thing but at least I have my reasons! I was trying to enjoy my freedom when I was in Paris! I was afraid he'll know about my real life and eventually be turned off by it! But I was going to tell him everything! I left a letter for him and what did he do? He ignored it! He went on his life without even talking to me! Without even clearing things between us!
Ugh! Why am I even getting heated up at something that's already done? Hindi naman na importante 'yon. Ang importante ay ang buhay ko ngayon, kasama si Dash.
"W-wala naman. Natanong ko lang. Anyway, I should go. Ingat ka pauwi."
"Goodnight, my life."
I smiled and went out of his car nervously. Pagkaalis niya ay nanghina ako ng sobra.
I don't think Dash will accept it if he learns the truth.
Bakit ba kasi sa lahat ng tao sa mundo, talagang kapatid pa pala ng boyfriend ko ang lalakeng hinahanap hanap ko noon?
Damian's POV
"Pre, chicks."
"Ano ba naman 'yan Gio, hanggang ngayon ba naman babae pa rin nasa isip mo palagi?"
"Wow Silva, ikaw ba hindi?"
"Syempre hindi. Mabait na 'to."
"G*go maniwala ako sa'yo. Last week lang may kasama kang babae ah."
"Ha? Sino doon?"
"HAHAHAHA Taena mo, huling huli."
They all burst out laughing while I just continued to drink my beer. Nasa isang exclusive club kami ngayon dito sa Serenaville. When Nigel heard that Silva and Art are also here in the Philippines, he immediately invited them. Naging isang mini reunion tuloy ang ganap dahil nakompleto na uli kaming magkakaibigan.
"Tahimik mo ah. What, you left your tongue on someone's pussy?" Nigel joked around as he sat down beside me.
"Ang bastos talaga nito ni Nigel. Pre, mahiya ka nga," Silva chuckled. "Sa bunganga lang daw ng kahalikan niya naiwan ang dila niya, grabe ka."
Umiling na lang ako at kumain ng chips bago ako um-order uli ng isang case ng beer. Sa tinagal tagal kong kaibigan sila, normal na sa'kin mga katarantaduhan nila.
"Dang, someone's about to get wasted tonight," natatawang sambit ni Art.
"Problema mo?" amused na tanong ni Nigel.
"Tigilan niyo ko," iritableng sagot ko.
"Mukhang may problema ka nga." He laughed but didn't push it.
Kilala niya ako. Kapag sumeryoso ako, ibig sabihin ayoko talagang ginugulo pa ako. Nigel once annoyed me while I was in a bad mood and we both ended up punching each other in the face. Simula noon ay naintindihan niya nang may mga oras na hindi dapat ako ginagambala.
My friends are all having a fun time, dancing with random girls, drinking liquors till they loose their balance. I used to be like them until Paris happened---she happened.
Nang maingayan sa lakas ng music at makulitan sa mga babaeng kanina pa lapit ng lapit sa akin ay nagdesisyon akong umalis muna. Umakyat ako sa rooftop ng bar at doon tumambay. This is off limits to customers but who cares? I can just pay them a huge amount of cash to keep them from bothering me.
Malamig ang simoy ng hangin pagbukas ko ng pintuan. I looked up and saw an empty dark sky. Walang ni isang bituin. Mukhang uulan yata.
Naglakad ako papunta sa railing at sinilip ang ibaba. Everyone's having the time of their life. Lahat ay nakangiti at nagtatawanan. That was my goal for the night but somehow, getting drunk just won't do it.
I sighed and closed my eyes while I leaned on the railing.
Kahit anong dami ng alak ang inumin ko, pumapasok pa rin talaga sa isip ko si Iris. Kinalimutan ko na siya noon. Pinilit ko ang sarili kong maka-move on pero nang magkita ulit kami kanina, bumalik 'yung dating nararamdaman ko para sa kanya.
It's insane that I have this thirst to be with her. Na kahit matagal na panahon na ang lumipas ay gusto ko pa ring makasama siya.
Or maybe I just got hung up with the idea of being with her. I got obssessed at the time we spent together that until now, I am still longing to have it all again.
"I knew you'll be here."
I opened my eyes and saw Nigel again. "The f*ck are you doing here?"
"Just checking up on you. You look like you're going to jump or atleast do something extreme."
I frowned. "That bad?"
"Yeah bro. You're a mess." Tumayo siya sa tabi ko at inalok ako ng kape. He drinks coffee when he's drunk. Pangpaalis ng hilo at antok.
I accepted it and thanked him.
Nigel's an ass but he's a good friend.
"My mind's a mess," I admitted.
"Who isn't?"
I smiled and sipped some coffee. We were both silent for a minute until I opened up a little bit.
"Have you ever liked someone so much, all you ever wanted is to be with her but unfortunately, you never had the chance to be with her?"
"Oh. So it's a girl problem."
I chuckled but hesitated to keep talking. Gustuhin ko mang magkwento ay hindi ko magawa. I know Nigel won't judge Iris but I just feel like I shouldn't tell anyone about this. I have to protect her from the harsh world.
"Just spit it out. You'll feel better when you talk to someone," He advised.
"And that someone is you? No sh*t."
He smirked. "Atleast you know I can keep a secret."
Natigil ako sa sinabi niya. Nigel's one of my friends who always has my back. Ni minsan, hindi niya ako nilaglag sa mga kalokohan ko. Alam kong kapag may kinuwento ako sa kanya ay hindi iyon makakalabas kahit kanino. He doesn't care about anyone's gossip.
" What if...what if the girl I like is with someone else now?" I asked.
"Take her away then."
"Seryoso kasi."
"Seryoso naman ako. Bakit hindi mo ipaglaban kung mahal mo talaga?"
I thought about it for a while. "What if she's with someone I also care about?"
"What, are you not straight? You also like the guy?"
I rolled my eyes. "Parang g*go naman 'to kausap e."
"HAHAHAHA joke lang, ito naman." Sumandal na rin siya sa railing at ipinatong sa sahig ang empty mug niya. "Her boyfriend's your friend?"
I wish it was that easy.
"Close friend?" He tried to guess again.
He's right. I need to tell someone about my problem or else, I might go crazy. Nakakabaliw na hindi ko magawang mailabas ang saloobin ko.
I looked at my hands and just laid the truth.
"Brother."
I could feel his eyes on me. "Wait, huh? Boyfriend niya kapatid niya? What the heck? Incest?"
"T*ngina Nigel, layuan mo nga 'ko. Naaalibadbaran ako sa'yo."
"HAHAHAHAHA ang gulo mo kasi magkwento. Ayusin mo kaya?!"
I groaned and closed my eyes but kept my mouth shut.
"Ano ba kasing sinasabi mong kapatid? Wait..." He suddenly stopped laughing. "Whoah."
Minulat ko ang mga mata ko at tumingin uli ako sa kanya. He looked shocked.
"No way. Dude!" He added.
Uminom na lang ako ng kape at hinayaan ang utak niya na i-process ang sinabi ko.
"Are you telling me you're into Dashiell's girlfriend? Seryoso ka?"
I slowly nodded.
"PRE, TULEG KA NA BA? Bakit si Iris pa?"
Bumuntong hininga ako. "I liked her first."
"What does that mean?"
"We met in Paris two years ago. Believe me or not but I instantly wanted her in my life. We immediately had a spark together but for some reason, she suddenly vanished the next day. Sinubukan ko siyang hanapin, I hired a lot of people to look for her but no one found her."
"But she's famous, dude. She's one of us, Damian. Laman siya ng balita mula pagkabata. Palagi siyang nasa internet. What kind of people did you hire then? Oh I know, a bunch of morons!"
Umiling ako. "No, she lied to me. All this time I've been looking for a girl named Irene without even knowing her real name's Iris." Tila may bumara sa lalamunan ko habang inaalala ko ang mga nangyari noon. "I thought I'll never see her again. But what are the odds, right?" Natatawa akong napailing. "I finally found her."
"In the arms of your brother."
My heart literally ached upon hearing those words. "Minsan lang ako magmahal pero napunta pa sa kapatid ko."
"Dude, that is so messed up. I need to drink again because my brain just can't handle this while sober." Napangiti ako kahit na ang sikip sikip na ng dibdib ko.
Tumakbo siya bigla papunta sa pintuan ngunit bumalik rin pagkatapos ng ilang minuto. May dala dala na siyang apat na bote ng beer na iniangat niya pa habang naglalakad palapit sa akin.
"Tarantado ka talaga." I chuckled but accepted a bottle anyway. We both sat on the ground and started drinking again.
"Ano nang plano mo niyan?" tanong niya.
"Huh?"
"About Iris. Clearly you still have some unresolved feelings for her. Ngayon lang kita nakitang mamroblema sa isang babae. You really fell for her, huh?"
Tumingin ako sa langit nang kumulog ng malakas.
"I don't know, man. We were only together for a day."
"Why'd she left anyway?"
"Hindi ko rin alam. Masaya pa kami pagkatapos may mangyari sa'min. She even kissed me goodnight---" Itinigil ko agad ang pagkukwento ngunit huli na ang lahat. Narinig na iyon ni Nigel. F*ck. I got carried away.
"Sh*t dude! You had a one night stand with her?"
"I wouldn't call it that because it was more than just for pleasure. We had plans together. Magkikita dapat kami kinabukasan. Something must have happened for her to ditch me."
"Gagi, 'di yata nasiyahan kaya ka iniwan. Sabi sa'yo more practice pa---" Babatukan ko sana siya kaso nakailag siya.
"You're such a jerk when you want to be, Nigel," buwiset na sambit ko. "Shut up."
He laughed again. "If it was more, she wouldn't just leave. Why don't you confront her and talk about it?"
"Are you telling me to complicate things between them? I can't do that."
"Hindi ko naman sinabing jowain mo. Ang sinabi ko lang, magusap kayo. Hindi ka rin naman matatahimik hangga't hindi mo naririnig ang side niya. What happened between the two of you is already a complication on their relationship."
"What's the point? Wala namang magbabago. At the end of the day, Iris is Dashiell's girlfriend. And I love my brother too. I can't hurt him."
"Well then that's it. You just have to get over that heartache and put the past behind. Ang tanong, kaya mo ba? Kaya mong maging parte si Iris ng pamilya niyo na hindi inaalala ang nangyari noon? Those two just celebrated their anniversary today. I have feeling they'll be together for a long time. Malimit lang magaway ang dalawang 'yon. They have a pretty solid bond. Baka dumating pa ang araw na magpakasal sila."
I suddenly imagined Iris walking down the isle in a white gown. Instead of meeting me in front of the altar, she went to my brother's and held his hand.
I was also there, standing at the side, as Dashiell's best man, watching them finally get their happily-ever-after while I'm still stuck wondering about the what-ifs.
"Yeah, you're right. I need to hear her reason. At least for the sake of my peace."
*End of Chapter 34*
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4.15.22
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