Ryder's POV
I stare at the same light grey wall, I've been gazing at since Elias walked away from me. Sitting on my bed, the silence is unnerving.
I'm not sure how long it's been since he left me. Hours? Days?
It's all my fault. If I just controlled myself he would still be with me. If I just held myself back he wouldn't of ran off. If I just—
Edmund - You couldn't help it Ryder. Stop beating yourself up.
I groan at my wolf. You should be mad at me for scaring him away.
Edmund - But I'm not. You couldn't help it, the bond is getting stronger everyday. It's dangerous to be unmated this long. Elias will realise that and forgive you.
I shake my head, ignoring his words. I knew he didn't want my mark, and still, I nearly marked him.
Edmund - You were losing control, it's not your fault.
I rest my head in my heads and tug at the top of my hair in frustration. Stop lying to me. I yell at my wolf in desperation. Before Edmund could say anything back, I push him away in my head, forcefully shutting him out.
Once again the room was silent, aside from my deep breathing. My stomach rumbles, reminding me I haven't eaten since the pasta I made for Elias and I.
Goddess I miss him. I miss his scent. I miss his laugh. I miss his smile, and his dimples. I miss his touch. I miss his voice. I miss his warm-
"Ryder? What the hell are you doing?" I look up at Blaze who's standing in my bedroom door way with a shocked expression.
"What's wrong?" He asks, watching me carefully as stare up at him blankly.
"What is taking you so long?" Arabella walks up behind Blaze and pauses when she sees me sitting on the edge of my bed. "What did you do to him?" She whispers to Blaze, which is useless since werewolves have incredible hearing.
"Me?" Blaze questions looking back at Arabella, "I didn't do anything! I just found him like this," he defends himself.
The two continue to bicker, making me roll my eyes, "you know I'm right here, right," I tell them making them cease their argument.
Blaze clears his throat, "so, um, exactly what are you doing?" He asks peeking into my room, as if he was trying to sense what was happening.
"Sitting," I grumble, holding my head in my hands again. I hear Blaze shuffle awkwardly, still standing in the door way.
"Cool, um- want me to sit with you?" He asks gently. I shrug. I hear Blaze slowly walk over to the bed and sit next to me. In my peripheral vision I can see Blaze looking at me with a grin.
Arabella stands where Blaze was originally. "Why have you shut out Edmund?" Arabella questions me.
As wolves, we are able to sense when other wolves are present or not. If not, either a wolf chose to shut themselves out or their person shut them out. Arabella happened to guess the latter.
"He was annoying me," I mutter. Don't get me wrong, I love Edmund to death, but at this moment he was getting on my last nerve trying to lie to me about the situation.
Arabella nods slowly, "clearly," she murmurs. "What's made you so depressed, that you happened to even skip training today?"
"Yeah?" Blaze agrees with Arabella, "we thought you were with Elias or something to skip out on training." I glare at Blaze when he speaks his name. Blaze's eyes widen when he realises I'm staring at him, I watch as he looks over to Arabella, signalling for help.
"Stop scaring him," Arabella groans walking over to us. "What happened with Elias," she asks me gently, leaning down to be face to face with us.
I break my glare from Blaze, looking down to my hands. "I messed up," I whisper.
"Did you kill Silas?" Blaze questions wary.
Arabella death glares Blaze at that. I chuckle in my hands, "no, I actually didn't do that."
"Oh," Blaze shrugs, "then surely it can't be that bad."
Continuing to hide my face, I groan out, "I nearly marked him."
Arabella's eye widen while Blaze looks confused. "Isn't that a good thing?" He questions.
"Not when he doesn't want me to mark him." I mutter. Blaze makes an 'O' face, understanding.
"Edmund is trying to tell me it's not my fault, that I wasn't in control. But either way I shouldn't of tried marking him, when he doesn't want me to," I confess.
Blaze nods, taking in what I said.
"Edmund's right, Ryder," Arabella agrees with my wolf. "At this rate, the chances of you guys going into heat is high, it's been what? Two so weeks since finding out you guys were mates?" She asks for confirmation, making me nod. "It's not normal for wolves to prevent the mating process from happening, I've read about this before and you're only going to continuing losing control until you mark each other," she informs me.
"But he doesn't want me," I whisper.
Arabella sighs and sits down on the other side of me, "he does want you Ryder. I could tell by the way he looked at you yesterday," she tells me as Blaze nods in agreement. "He's going to need to sort out his shit with Silas sooner or later, but you're not in the wrong here," she says truthfully.
"Just give him some time and he'll come back to you when he realises you never intended to hurt him," Blaze suggests.
I sigh out loud, taking in what my best friends told me. I know that I never meant to try mark Elias in that moment, but I still feel bad for losing control on him like that. But maybe it will be best to get him the space until he comes back to me... if he comes back to me.
"Now, let Edmund be in control, Alexis wants to go for a run with him and Nick," Arabella tells both Blaze and I, while standing up. Alexis was Arabella's wolf, while Nick was Blaze's.
Blaze stands up as well, "yeah Nick would like that," he tells her. Blaze and Arabella both close their eyes, trying to push forward their wolves so they would be in control.
I try calling out to Edmund in my head, hoping he would come back after I pushed him away earlier.
Alexis and Nick look over to me once they had
full control. "Don't tell me he's not coming out?" Nick scoffs, his hands resting on his hips.
"I think he's still mad I pushed him away earlier," I mumble.
"Fair enough, I would be too if Arabella pushed me away when I was trying to help her," Alexis jabs at me, making me roll my eyes.
Nick snickers, "I know what will help," he says. Before I can ask him what, he walks over to me and slaps me on the back of my head.
Pain floods to the back of my head, "OW- WHAT THE FUCK NICK," I yell at him, standing up.
Nick chuckles, holding his hands up in surrender and walks back slowly, "just wait for it," he laughs out.
I swear I'm going to kill this fucker, he better fuckin—
Edmund - what's happening? Are you okay? Edmund's voice sounds in my head.
Nick smirks at me, clearly sensing Edmunds presence. How did this fucker know what to do?
Nothing, I'm fine Ed. But your annoying friend here wants you to run with them. I tell him, while Nick and Alexis wait standing in front of me.
Edmund - hm, I can see. Fine, I'll take control.
I close my eyes and let Edmund push his way forward in my mind and take control of my body.
Edmund's POV
My eyelids open to my best friends standing in front of me. Alexis is smiling at me while Nick is still smirking.
Ryder - I'm sorry for pushing you away Ed.
I hum at him in acknowledgement. I know. It's okay, Ryder.
Ryder - When you're done with your run with them, we'll talk more later. I'll leave you be with them. Ryder tells me before shutting himself out to let me have my own time. I can't sense Arabella or Blaze with Alexis or Nick either.
I walk over to Nick and hit him on the back of the head, "don't hit Ryder again, dumbass," I mutter to him.
Nick laughs before hugging me, "miss you too. And besides it got you to come out," he tells me honestly. I roll my eyes at him as he pulls away.
"Come on idiots, I'm dying for a run right about now," Alexis tells us as she walks out the bedroom door.
"Yes sir," Nick salutes to Alexis' back. I push him slightly as I run ahead of both Nick and Alexis, trying to beat them to the forest outside my house. I can hear them both run after me as I stumble my way out of the house.
Once outside I transform into my wolf form, Alexis and Blaze following after me as they transform into their own wolfs.
My jet black fur brushes against the wind as I run on all four against the breeze. The colour of a wolves coat doesn't correlate to rank or status. We are able to determine the status and rank of wolves by scent alone.
In my peripheral vision I can see Nick's dark brown wolf running beside me at the same pace. His tongue hanging out, clearly enjoying the run.
We both watch as Alexis's copper coat run past us, clearly showing off. Nick and I look at each other, knowingly, both increase our speed to catch up to her.