it's my birthday in three days and i have no plans at all, it's kind of sad to be honest. I would normally go and get baked but that's not me anymore.
i woke up this morning around 9:45am, i had a job interview. Yes i never thought i'd see this day coming at all, but i've decided i can't just rely on harry to pay for things for me, my bills especially. Although it feels amazing i also hate the idea of me using him for his money. The boys and his channel have been doing so well recently they've been making £££. Harry offered to help me set up a youtube channel but i wanted to just stick with twitch streaming, it seemed less stressful to say the least.
i'm on my way to the interview and i've never felt so anxious about something so little. If it fails then i try again and i keep trying until i find the job i want to stay in.
'miss chloe louise' the women spoke from the other side of the waiting room. I looked up and smiled.
'so what makes you think you-' she continued asking me the questions i answered what i thought were the best answers, after all this is my first interview since i was like 17.
'and now i just have to wait' i smiled as i walked besides harry who had came to meet.
'what made you go for this job chlo? doesn't seem like a you kind of job' he said as he zipped up his coat. Clearly feeling the wind that had started to pick up its pace.
i shrugged
'to be honest i've always had an interest in writing and drawing and all that kind of stuff, i just never done anything about it' i held onto his arm.
'so that's why you don't answer me for hours on end?' he looked down at me.
i furrowed my brows
'you know..when i try calling you and you never answer' he continued
'what are you going on about?' i chuckled slightly.
'so you're telling me you love writing, drawing etc and you don't do it in your spare time?' he shivered.
'should we head back to mine?' i said trying to switch up the topic. He stood still for a moment causing me to stop in my tracks and looked at me.
'if you show me some of your sketches' he gave me a cheeky grin. I laughed and shook my head.
'looks like somebody might get a big cold' i stated..he didn't respond and just glared at me
'fine' dragging him from his current position we carried on the walk to my place.
shutting the door behind me i took off my coat and headed to my room.
'i'll be back!' i said, i hate showing people my work, it's always something i've kept to myself but i feel like harry will love me for it.
i changed out of my uncomfortable smart clothes and into some slouchy grey joggers and an oversized t.
i dragged out the suitcase full of stuff into the living room, with struggle.
'here let me help' harry came over and picked it up, taking it over to the living room.
'you know i really don't want to show you these' i sighed looking at the still unopened suitcase.
'you don't have too, i'll show myself' he patted my thigh, he sat down on the floor and opened the suitcase. I sat on the sofa staring at him.
he picked up the latest drawing i had done.
it was of mine and harry's first date..what i could remember of it anyway.
'i recognise this' he looked back at me confused
'i don't know why' i shrugged not wanting to make him cringe over the act.
He continued looking through my pieces and eventually came to one of my favourite pieces i've ever done.
'chloe this is amazing' he came and sat next to me, painting in hand.
'it's one of my favourites' i smiled slightly.
'mine too' he admired it.
'i drew it when my addiction started, i was so angry at myself, frustrated, ashamed all the bad things you can think of at myself. But it felt amazing, the buzz off of it.' i started explaining.
harry was staring at me the whole time.
just listening, which felt nice.
'my family were telling me i was a disgrace..
my friends were telling me i was embarrassing and that it wasn't cool, when i never did it because i thought it was cool..i did it because-' i started tearing up. Harry had noticed and brought me into a hug.
i sniffled
'this is why i hate showing anyone my work' i mumbled into his chest
'they're amazing chlo, you're so talented. Every artists work has a meaning behind it just not every body knows' he kissed the top of my head.
i looked up at him and smiled.
'i love you' i said without hesitation. He smiled and kissed me.
'i love you too' he whispered in my ear.
that moment didn't feel real.