Li
"It was a dark and stormy night," Devin started.
"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me," I murmured while facepalming. Randy chuckled, and Knox seemed to be questioning his entire existence.
"But it's three days before Halloween. This seems mandatory," Dev replied, sad puppy eyes and all.
"It really isn't," Knox answered. "Don't put us through this, McCoy."
"Awwww." Dev actually appeared to be kinda sad. "I prepared a whole story."
I sighed. "Go for it." We were sitting in Devin's room, me trying to explain to them how calculus works. We quickly got sidetracked, as you can most likely tell. When I barged into Dev's room to yell at him for eating my popcorn and saw Randy and Knox casually beating the shit out of each other (don't ask, I have no clue why), they kinda forced me to stay.
While Devin began telling his story again, my phone pinged.
Randy: what are the chances the best scary story would be telling Devin his best friend went on a date with his sibling?
Me: I have no idea. should we wait to see how round 2 goes?
Randy: idk. when is that happening by the way?
Me: no clue. I choose everything this time
Randy: damn, ok. so I don't get any say in the matter?
Me: ...a little...I guess...BUT I LIKE BEING IN CONTROL
Randy: ok dominant
Me: WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!?!?!?
Randy: LMAOOOOO
"Okay, hear me out, but why the hell does it seem like Randy and Liam are texting?" Knox asked.
"Hm. Yes. I noticed that too," Dev responded, giving us a look.
Randy and I started laughing hysterically, and Devin and Knox stared. After giving Randy a nod, he said, "Gentlemen. It is my honor to announce that I went on a date with Li and that happened when during HOCO I asked him out and got his phone number."
"Wait...what?" Knox asked, making me and Randy laugh even harder.
Meanwhile, Devin's jaw dropped, and tackled Randy. "Dude, we could be brothers in law someday! Oh my God, this is so fucking cool!" Randy hugged him back.
"Ran, you went out with Liam?" Knox leaned forward. "That's really awesome." He joined in on the bro hug that Devin initiated, and I smiled. I like it when guys can express physical affection without needing to remind everyone of their masculinity afterwards.
"Liam, you need to hang out with us more," Dev got up from the hug and exchanged that for tackling me.
"Eh. We'll see how date number two goes," I said, winking at Randy. Him and Knox were laying down next to one another, Randy groaning, probably because Devin weighs 170 pounds.
"Ugh. Fine."
Pretty much the whole rest of the night, Dev was particularly happy. I was glad he was okay with it.
~~~~~
At 8:00pm the next day, I got a text from a number I didn't recognize.
Unknown Number: hey Liam
Me: who is this?
Unknown Number: Knox
Me: oh
Me: hi
Unknown Number: hello lmao
Me: how did you get my number...? and why...? I'm very confused
Knox: Randy. figured he would find it less suspicious than Dev who would go full-on overprotective brother interrogating mode. anyway, can I talk to you?
Me: yeah, he would probably try to get you to do a background check or something. and sure I guess. what's up?
Knox: when did you realize you were gay?
Me: uh. I think I was ten or eleven. why?
Knox: I was curious
Me: ok...
Me: is that all?
Knox: uh yeah that's it
Me: spit it out, I don't care lol
Knox: how did you know?
Me: I had only ever found guys attractive lmfao
Knox: that's one way of learning
Me: certainly. also the most common.
Knox: right, yeah, sure
Knox: hypothetically, let's say you liked girls when you were younger but now you have no interest in them. let's also say your parents are insanely strict and are putting pressure on you to propose to a girl that they approve of the summer after your sophomore year of college. is the no longer feeling attracted to women a result of the parents forcing you to find a girlfriend and stay with her, or should this person look for an 'are you gay' quiz on Buzzfeed? asking for a friend...
Me: huh. well, I can't really tell anyone why they're feeling what they are. its not really my body, you know? but I would like to say to this person that 1. I am sorry their parents are like that 2. don't ever use quizzes. bad idea. seriously, please don't 3. you don't need to figure anything out right now, you've got tons of time! don't rush it!!! 4. if this person ever needs someone to talk to I'm always here :)
Knox: my friend says thank you lol
Knox: I'm scared. my parents wouldn't be happy if they found out I was gay or bi or something. and the school isn't overly welcoming, either. I have no idea how Randy is so chill with everything between you guys. I would be so terrified
Me: I'm sorry :( one question though; do you know if you're attracted to guys? or are you just not attracted to anyone? of course, if you're comfortable with answering
Knox: yeah, I like guys. wow, that felt weird to say. but I actually have a crush on one and I have since the day I met him, pretty much
Me: well, that's kinda... I think you know what it is. are you certain it's romantic attraction and not aesthetic attraction? I know it may not seem like it, but they are two different things
Knox: do wet dreams count towards romantic?
Me: enough said
Knox: so then whats the best way to know for sure?
Me: you really can't. time and experimentation are really the only two ways to know. I, however, figured it out without the experimentation part
Knox: what do you mean by experimentation?
Me: do things with guys like you would with girls and see if you enjoy it or not lmao
Knox: OH
Knox: WELL IM FUCKED
Knox: THERES ZERO FULLY OUT GUYS AT OUR SCHOOL HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THIS?!?!?
Me: I mean I would normally volunteer butttt I would rather have my first kiss with someone I'm actually somewhat interested in
Knox: you've never kissed anyone? that's just sad
Me: I'm tryna help you here, bud
Knox: right. sorry. moving on
Me: who's the dude you like? if you don't mind me asking. I have a pretty good gaydar lmfao
Knox: .........................
Me: you don't have to answer, don't worry about it
Knox: RADNY FUCKIMG ROVKEFELLWR
Me: oh
Me: well damn, ok then
Knox: I KNOW AND I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT BECAUSE YOURE WITH HIM AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT I AM AND MY PARENTS WOULD BE SO MAD AND IDK WHY BUT HES REALLY CUTE BUT SO IS DEV BUT I DONT LIKE HIM AND SOMEONE FUCKING HELP ME
Me: really all I can suggest is to try not to get too stressed about it. I know it's hard, but it'll only make it worse. I'm sorry I can't do more
Knox: it's ok. just telling someone helped. thanks Liam
Me: sure. again, I'm always here :D
Knox: thank you
Me: mhm
And that was that.
~~~~~
The following morning as I walked into the kitchen, I announced, "I'm gay."
"I know," Mom answered, not bothering to glance up from her laptop.
"I had suspicions," Dad added.
"I know that too," I replied, pouring myself some orange juice. "I'm also genderfluid."
Dad paused and nodded. "No clue what that means, but alright."
"I had an idea you weren't cisgender," Mom said.
CeCe, Dev, and I shared a look. CeCe took a bite of her bacon and joked, "Mother knows best."
"Yeah, seriously though," Dev mumbled.
I snickered and sat next to CeCe. Oh, my wonderful, amazing family.
"Twins. You two doing anything for Halloween?" Mom asked.
"Yeah, Brady's having a party that I'm going to," Dev responded.
"Take a guess, Mom," was my contribution.
"Either you're not doing anything, or you're going to one of your friend's houses to hang out. Correct, Liam?" Mom questioned.
"Ding ding ding. Second one. I still have a costume that I'm going to put five minutes of effort into, but that's it."
"Oh come on, the party will be fun," Dev insisted. "You should come."
"I think not. I'm guessing there will be couples dressed up as Woody and Jessie from Toy Story, and guys will be devils wearing no shirts and horns?"
"..."
"Exactly my point. What's your costume?"
"..."
I sighed. "You're one of the devils?"
"Vampires. You should know that no matter how hard I try, I can not be creative."
"Oh, I know."
"What about you?" He inquired.
"Danny from Grease. I own a leather jacket, jeans, Converse. It's minimal effort."
"Who the hell is Danny from Grease?"
"Danny from Grease is Danny from Grease."
"Hm. That doesn't answer much." Dev pulled out his phone, supposedly to look it up. "Oh. It's a movie. And a musical, my oh my. Huh."
"Yup."
"Well, you'd be able to see your boyfriend shirtless if you came to the party."
"Boyfriend?" Mom asked, lifting her gaze from her laptop.
"We went on one date, that's it. And he isn't even out, Devie, so what's the point?" I questioned. "Plus, I'm not sure if I want to be near someone who has a shirtless costume."
"Whatever. Your choice," Dev said, probably trying some reverse psychology bullshit. It wasn't working.
"Still not going."
"I already told you it was okay."
"Not going."
I went.
That made me realize that I knew what my New Years resolution would be, even though it was two months away; learn to say no more often.
~~~~~
"I can't believe you dragged me into this," I grumbled. I tied my Converse High Tops, a necessity for Danny.
Dev, on the other hand, was struggling with making his 'fangs' stay on. He was putting far too much time into his costume. He was working on it for a good two hours before I came in. That was the moment I knew that Devin was just as much image-obsessed as Randy and Knox. I guess being popular really does change you.
"K, I'm ready. Let's go," Dev said.
"Alright."
~~~~~
Brady's house was fricken huge. I've had people tell me before that my house is large, but Brady's had to have been on the list for Top 100 Mansions in the United States. It was pretty damn impressive.
"I'm assuming you want to find Sylvia?" I asked.
"No, she doesn't go to our school. I'm seeing her tomorrow, we're going on a double date with her older sister and her boyfriend," Dev replied. "I thought you knew she doesn't go to Rockefeller."
"Nope. But she's just coming to your school stuff instead of you going to hers?"
"Yeah."
"Hm. Okay."
"First on the list is find Randy and Knox. They're most likely somewhere near the food and drinks," Devin said.
"There's alcohol here?"
"Of course. There is at every party."
"Please tell me I won't have to deal with a drunk Devin," I pleaded. "Or Randy or Knox.
"No, never. I won't drink. Promise. Can't guarantee the others won't, though." He opened the door. We were immediately met with, you guessed it, shirtless guys and music you could barely hear over. Oh, what fun this will be.
And like Dev said, Randy and Knox stood near the food and drinks. Knox gave me an awkward half-smile, and Randy frantically waved. "Hello."
"Hey. Excited to see me?" I teased.
"Very."
"I exist too, you know," Devin commented, but it was clear he didn't really care.
Randy rolled his eyes, and turned to me again. "You look good. What are you supposed to be, though?"
"I'm a who. Danny from the amazing movie and musical, Devin," I joked. "Grease," I answered. "You're... something I assume?"
"A dead admirer. Didn't you see the rose?" He asked, holding up what seemed to be an actual rose. "And the makeup that I blackmailed my sister into doing for me?"
"Hm, so that's why there is 'scars' all over your chest?"
"Yeah!" Randy exclaimed. "Do I look hot?"
"Meh. Don't know why you felt the need to be shirtless, but I won't complain." I averted my gaze to Knox. "Hey. Thanks for being semi-clothed. Cowboy?"
"Yup. How'd you guess?" He said, a laugh laced through his voice. "Were the cowboy hat and boots a tip-off?"
"Maybe, I'm not quite sure."
"Hm, I bet. Hey, Adelaide loves Grease. Could I maybe take a picture of you to send to her? I swear to God, she will love you forever."
I chuckled. "Sure."
Knox snapped a picture, and quickly put his phone away. "So, shall we party? Me and Randy found a big ass bowl of candy, earlier. We should eat it all before everyone else does."
"Let's do it," Dev replied.
~~~~~
People are exhausting. Fifteen minutes socializing, and I'm beat. I was able to sneak outside where there were many less people. I did find our neighbor making out with someone, though. That was a little awkward. I didn't need to see Felicity with someone's tongue down her throat.
Eventually, I discovered a swinging bench off to the side of the yard and sat on it. It was fairly peaceful until a familiar voice called out, "Hey."
I turned my head to spot Knox only a few yards away. "Hey back, Walmart Knoxoff."
He smiled and took a seat next to me. "Thanks for listening last night."
"No problem."
He was silent for a few more seconds before saying, "It sucks to like your best friend."
"That's very understandable."
Sighing, he added, "And when you think the dude he's dating is cute, too."
That caught me off guard. "What about Dev? He looks almost exactly like me."
"Eh. He's a little too chaotic for me. Doesn't mean he isn't my best friend for life, though. I've known Dev for longer, and that makes me think of him like a brother. Randy is completely different."
"Huh. Interesting." I paused. "You don't make me violently ill when I look at you, either."
He laughed. "High praise. I'll take it."
There were a couple more moments of no speaking, then I casually dropped, "I'm genderfluid."
"Random, but okay. Thanks for letting me know. Pronouns?"
"I don't want to use any different pronouns yet, at least until I can get used to it. I do go by Li, though. Just Li."
"Okay."
I stopped to take a glance at him. It was still somewhat bright outside, the sun barely starting to go down. So, you could see he was wearing two small gold studs in his ear, and a thin chain around his neck. When he peeked at me, an eyebrow raised, I noticed that he had really pretty gray eyes. "What?" He inquired.
"I'm appreciating your features, obviously," I responded.
"I- you know what, never mind." Knox chortled and gazed at the view. His messy dark brown hair shone in the fading light of the sun. All in all, he looked decidedly good.
"Yeah, you're not wildly unattractive," I concluded.
"Glad to hear you think so," he replied. He placed his arms on the back of the bench, forearms dangling. His arm brushed mine, resulting in me wondering if I really was a gray-aromantic or if I simply hadn't met enough attractive guys.
This is not a good situation for me.
~~~~~
A/N: hello younglins
although chances are you're all older than me
fact seven: my mom is a romance author, and answers many of my questions about writing and stuff. plus, she's been in a lot of relationships while I've been in none... SO she explains how people flirt and shi idk lmao but she helps a lot so shout-out to my mommy <3
thoughts on the whole Knox deal? I'm actually pretty excited lol
farewell y'all, have a good day/night!!