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Anna dreaded the school year just as much as the next student out there. With her senior year coming up, she felt many mixed emotions about it. She woke up to her schedule being released, and she looked it over with half-open eyes and a still sleep filled state of mind.
Anna's eyes scanned the screen as she stretched. How could senior year be here already? She felt like it was just yesterday that she had started high school in the first place and now it was her graduating year. After reading over everything, she rolled over and took her time getting out of bed. She felt exhausted from the night before - avoiding her father and his questions and Linda pestering about her staying in her room all night took more energy out of her than she thought it would.
Wake up, brush teeth, do hair, get dressed, eat breakfast.
She followed each step in her routine. She was trying to avoid having an off day - so before doing anything; she took her medicine. When she was ready for the day, she went to find Linda. She was getting ready for work and would leave soon, but Anna wanted to ask her something before she left.
"Linda?" Anna lightly knocked on her bedroom door.
"Good morning." Linda smiled as she placed a pair of earrings in her lobes.
"I got my schedule for school this morning." Anna told her.
"Did you?" she glanced over, "Any interesting classes?"
"No, just the basics." Anna shrugged.
"Maybe during the second term you will get some. Are you excited? This summer's blown by so fast." Linda commented.
"Yeah," Anna nodded, "I have a question though."
Anna wasn't sure why she felt so nervous asking her this. She knew it was silly but it wasn't her mother, so it made things a little awkward for her.
"Is everything okay?" Linda continued getting ready as they talked.
"Mom and I usually go school shopping at the mall when my schedule gets released. I was wondering... if we could do that?" Anna chewed on the inside of her cheek for a few seconds while she waited for a response.
"Oh honey," Linda sighed, "I would love too but I'm going to be extremely busy the next few weeks between work and the house upgrades. I just don't know if I'll have the time to take you."
Anna sighed, "Okay." She started to turn and leave the room.
"Wait," Linda called her back, "Why don't you go with Izzy and Amelia?"
Anna thought that was a good suggestion but it wasn't the same tradition that she was used to.
"I'm sure the three of you will have fun. I'll give you some money and you guys can get lunch too, is that alright?" Linda watched her.
"I guess so." Anna shrugged, wishing her mom were still there. They went every year - it never failed. They'd shop, eat lunch, and then upon returning home they'd get ice cream. Anna missed her more and more each day. She missed their talks, their time spent together, and most of all the sense of caring there her mother provided her with. Anna felt like she could go to her about anything - Linda, not so much. It wasn't that Anna didn't trust her, or disliked her, it just wasn't her mother...
Anna called up the girls and they all agreed to meet up at the mall. Linda dropped her off on her way to work and Anna spotted the other two girls standing outside already waiting for her.
"Hey!" Anna greeted them, "Who's ready for some shopping?"
"We're glad you called. I'm assuming you got the same notification from Pine Ridge High that I did?" Izzy raised a brow.
"Yup, got my senior schedule first thing this morning." Anna frowned, "How is summer almost over already?"
"I'm glad I graduated last year, but I'm always ready for some shopping!" Amelia commented.
"Let's get to it then," Anna laughed, "Thank you guys for coming. I appreciate it more than you guys probably know."
"That's what friends are for right?" Izzy said as they walked through the mall entrance.
"This year is just weird..." Anna shrugged, "Me and my mom used to go school shopping together every year. This is my second year shopping without her."
"How come?" Amelia wondered.
"She passed away. It's been almost two years now." Anna shrugged as they walked into the first clothing store they stumbled upon "And I asked Linda if she wanted to go... but she was too busy."
"How did your mom pass?" Izzy asked.
They walked over to a rack and started going through shirts. Anna felt each piece of material, figuring out which ones she liked and which ones she didn't. She was very particular about her clothing and how it felt against her skin.
Anna was quiet for a few moments, leaving Izzy to feel like she had overstepped. The truth was, nobody had ever asked Anna how her mom had passed so she really didn't know how to answer it in a respectful way that didn't upset her.
"Sorry..." Izzy looked through the same shirts.
"No, it's okay." Anna glanced at her and then continued feeling the fabric and grabbing a few shirts off the rack to look at.
"We understand if it's hard to talk about. You don't have to answer that." Amelia added.
"She was in an accident - we were in an accident." Anna thought about it, "I made it... she didn't."
"That's awful..." Izzy said.
"Yeah," Anna nodded, trying to keep herself composed as she put the clothing back on the rack, "I miss her a lot and I wanted Linda to come, but I'm glad you guys did."
"We're going to have a great day!" Amelia smiled, putting her hand on Anna's shoulders and steering her towards more clothes.
"Yes we are," Izzy agreed, "And I've got a lot of questions. I noticed my brother sneaking off somewhere when he was supposed to be camping with us. Know anything about that?"
Anna paused as she thought about what to tell them. How was she supposed to put her feelings into words when she couldn't even understand them? She thought about it.
"Well," she avoided their gazes as they went to the next store, "I went to go to this spot I found near Dinohenge, and he was... just there. We kinda hung out and he watched me zoning out for a while, but also kind of held my hand?"
"Shut up!" Amelia nearly squealed as she gently smacked Anna's arm.
"I'm starting to think Javi skipped our plans just to hang out with you." Izzy told her.
"Well I hope he didn't do that." Anna commented, holding a shirt up to her chest and waited for the girl's opinions. They both nodded and Anna placed it over her arm as they continued looking around.
"I've never seen Javi act like this." Izzy said.
"I don't think we've seen him have a crush like this before." Amelia added.
"He asked me a lot of questions about my OCD though, and it was really sweet." Anna told them.
"Yep, my brother is definitely crushing on you. He never listens to anyone when they speak." Izzy said, handing a shirt over to Anna.
"I've never really had a crush before," Anna told them, "He makes me a little bit nervous when he's around."
"Well that's pretty normal." Amelia smiled, "Girls tend to get more flustered than guys anyways."
The girls spend most of their day shopping. They picked out so many clothes that they had a ton of bags to carry with them. They were all exhausted when they finally sat down to each lunch together. Deciding on a place to go took a few minutes until they all agreed on something, but Anna was grateful when they did because she felt like she was starving.
Anna noticed that the two girls kept looking at each other with smirks hidden in their glances and she wondered what it was about. She wasn't sure if she should ask, but they looked like they were up to something and she was curious about it. She also noticed that Izzy kept looking down at her phone.
This made Anna a little nervous so she quietly started tapping her fingers against her leg while they all looked over menus. Still bummed about the day, she tried to pick something that she knew she would like. Part of her wanted to talk about her mom to the girls, but her brain was telling her to hush up about it. To not speak a word.
She sighed as she folded the menu closed and waited for the girls to make their choices before they ordered. She continued tapping her fingers and then figured out why the girls had kept exchanging looks and why Izzy had been looking down at her phone.
Anna made the connections the moment she saw Javi approaching them. Anna shifted in her seat and straightened her posture when Javi reached their table. She swallowed hard and ran her hands through her hair, suddenly feeling like she had to primp herself in his presence for no reason at all.
"Hey guys," Javi said, "Funny running into you here."
Anna looked at the two girls who were trying not to giggle and failing miserably. They had totally been in cohorts with Javi and somehow convinced him to come up there. Anna now wondered if they had told him everything she had said and she couldn't exactly as them at the moment.
"Oh, would you look at that... We have to go." Amelia stood up and grabbed Izzy's arm.
"Wait-" Anna tried to call after them but the two girls were already scurrying away with wide smiles on their faces and a playful wave.
Javi looked in their direction, watching them disappear from sight just as Anna did. She then cracked her knuckles nervously as Javi replaced the empty seat that Amelia had been sitting at. Anna knew exactly what happened but Javi seemed oblivious to it.
Anna couldn't leave him in the dark, "You know they totally just set us up right?"
She cleared her throat and waited for his response.
"Set us up for what?" Javi asked.
"A date." she awkwardly laughed.
"A date?" he repeated.
Anna nodded.
"Well," Javi said, "Those two are sneaky."
She agreed, unsure of what to say or what to even do.
You're just going to make things awkward.
"Well, we might as well order and eat lunch while we're here..." Javi suggested.
"Yeah..." she wasn't sure why she was so suddenly nervous. She wasn't even this nervous the other times she was with him, so she didn't understand why this time was any different. She felt like it was because she was set up and it wasn't a natural interaction - it was almost forced even though she didn't exactly not want it to happen.
Javi looked up at Anna and they met eyes for a second before she quickly looked away. Javi set the menu down that he was holding and watched her for a moment, seeing her seemingly uncomfortable. He thought for a few seconds and them remembered that he could easily try to distract Anna and hopefully pull her out of the space she was in.
"How about we go walking instead?" Javi suggested, "We could drop your bags off at home and then you could show me around Dinohenge, and show me all the things you find interesting about it."
Anna flashed her eyes with a little thank you smile attached with it, "Sorry. I don't know why I got so nervous."
"It's okay," Javi smiled, "If we're being honest... I'm nervous too. I don't like forced dates."
"I think that sounds like a great plan." Anna told him.
"Good. I don't want either of us to be nervous, plus, when I decide to take you on a date... I want it to be on my terms, not my sisters." Javi stood up and started gathering all her bags in both of his hands - not leaving a single one for her to carry.
Anna stood up and looked away again, hiding the blush forming against her skin at Javi's last comments. He pretty much just confirmed to her what the girls had been telling her all along. The two of them started trailing out of the lunch spot. Anna walked just a few steps ahead of Javi until they had gotten out to the sidewalk. She put her hands in her pockets so that she would stop fidgeting with them as she tried to calm the wave of nerves washing over her.
She took a quiet deep breath and swallowed hard.
"Looks like you guys did a lot of shopping." Javi carried her bags with no hesitation.
"Yeah, stupid school shopping." she rolled her eyes, "School season is coming way too soon and I am not ready for it - but hey... at least it's my senior year."
"I remember my senior year. I was so ready for it to be over with." he chuckled.
"I think I'm at that point too." she nodded.
"Are you going to go to college afterwards?" he asked.
"I don't know," Anna shrugged, "I haven't really thought about it. If I do, I feel like it would probably be a writing related pursuit."
"I was reading over your shoulder the other day. I don't read much, but what you wrote sounded good." he told her.
"Thanks," she smiled, "My mom used to read all my work and give me feedback. Then dad took over... and well now, I don't know if he's interested in that anymore."
"Why do you say that?" Anna slowed her pace so that she wasn't a few steps away anymore.
"The other morning I asked him to read something. He started too but as soon as he started too, Linda called him over and kind of just ruined the moment. She thinks writing is silly... I guess. At least that's the impression I've gathered from some of her comments." Anna shrugged.
"What kind of comments?" he asked.
"She just thinks writing is silly, that's all." Anna told him.
"I'd always be willing to read it over. Might not be able to give you very good feedback, but I'd read it." Javi told her.
"Something tells me that you'd have a biased opinion that works in my favor." Anna giggled.
"You might be right." he laughed, lightly nudging her as they rounded the corner to her block.
Anna smiled to herself as they approached her doorstep. She noticed that Linda was already home and she wondered if she would be able to talk to herself about how she felt about Javi. Thinking about the new feelings and strange ideas she thought about Javi, made her have a lot of questions - but she wasn't entirely sure if she could talk to Linda about them. Part of her felt like she would just be dismissed or lectures.
"I know we were supposed to go to Dinohenge, but Izzy just texted me and said she needed my help. Can we do a raincheck?" Javi asked.
Anna smiled at him, "Of course. Thanks for walking me home and carrying my bags."
"Can I at least take them inside for you before I run off?" he offered.
"That's all right, I can get them. See you later!" she took the bags from him and then set them down near the doorway.
After watching Javi stroll away, she gathered her bags and brought them inside. She set them all on the couch and then walked over to pick her baby brother up and give him a hug. He touched her cheek with his fingers and smiled before she set him back down where he was playing.
Linda was sitting on the couch with some things spread out in her lap but she looked up at Anna when she sat down with her. Anna mentally tried to think about how to talk about Javi, but she couldn't seem to find the right words to use.
"You're blushing." Linda noticed, "Was that Javi I heard outside?"
"Yeah," Anna nodded, "Can I ask you a couple of questions?"
"I'm really busy right now honey. Can it wait a little bit? I really need to get this finished before dad comes home." Linda said.
"I guess so... " Anna sighed, "I got all my clothes for school..."
"Good. You'll have to show me later." she smiled and then turned back to her work.
Anna took her bags up to her room and started putting all of her new items away, knowing that Linda probably won't look at her things later. She plopped down on her bean bag chair with a frustrated grimace and tried to not think about the annoyance that Linda was making her feel.
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