The day had begun as usual for Louise. She would sleep in only for Anser to honk at her to get up. She refused, opting to go back under the covers and ignore him. Said goose had enough of her antics and did the only reasonable thing he could do. Anser snatched up the end piece of her comforter and yanked it off her bed. Louise sat up with a yelp, glaring at her familiar who was happy she decided to wake up. She silently fumed as she got ready for the day, cursing her familiar for waking her up so early. If Anser heard her, he most likely didn't care. He had a big day planned and he didn't need his master dawdling around first thing in the morning. It was a lovely morning after all, and he was a horrible goose.
Louise and Anser made their way to the courtyard, where she told him to stay here as she went to go get her food. He watched her until she went inside. Great, time to get on with the day. First things first, where's his entrance? Anser surveyed the courtyard until he found his opening: Siesta carrying a cart of plates into the cafeteria. He tossed a stone past her as a distraction, which she easily took.
"What was that?" Anser climbed into the cart while she was occupied, the maid none the wiser. "Oh well, I should go on with my chores..." And just like that, Anser had infiltrated the building. Just in time too, as Louise had gotten up to leave with only a sandwich in hand. If he remembered correctly, she would be going to her usual spot underneath her favorite tree to eat. Good, he really didn't need her foiling his plans.
Enter the cafeteria. -Done!
Oh, now where to start... Well, the easiest option first. When no one was looking, Anser hopped out of Siesta's cart and dove underneath the tables. From here, he crept around until he found a boy who was too preoccupied with his friends to notice his knife was missing.
Get some cutlery. -Done!
Time for some mayhem, Anser thought deviously. He held the knife in his beak as he spotted his newest target. It would seem that peace was never an option. What a shame. A servant was dutifully pouring out the tea for a noble when Anser snuck up upon him. He rose up until he was level with the man's ear, the servant and noble blissfully unaware of what was happening.
"Hjönk!"
Splash!
Make the servant spill his tea. -Done!
"GAAAHH!" The boy cried out as the scalding hot tea was poured all over him.
"Oh Brimir Above, I am so sorry about that milord, I was startled and-"
"No excuses! I should have you flogged for this blatant disrespect of my name, you bumbling buffoon!" The student then took notice of the goose behind him, his fury unrelenting. "And you! You were the one who made this fool spill his tea, weren't you!?"
"Hjönk!"
"I'll make a stew out of you, you filthy-"
"Hjönk Hjönk!" Anser did not like that response one bit. With the reflexes that would put a trained assassin to shame, he dove at the boy, knife in beak. The boy let out a girlish shriek as the killer goose was now chasing him down with a knife. Neither noticed the runes in his wing glowing all the while. The other students and servants came to find out what was the commotion and quickly found out that a goose was loose in the cafeteria. The response was anger from the irate servants and laughter from the students. The poor student Anser was chasing was getting desperate as he gained the ire of the goose.
"I'm sorry! I regret my word choice! PLEASE SPARE ME!" The boy found a door ahead, hoping for it to be a safe haven. He quickly ran inside and shut himself in. He sighed in relief, knowing he was gone from the goose's wrath. He turned to continue, only to bump into a broom. "A broom closet. Well, that's not too bad..." Suddenly, he felt something crawl onto his shoulder. He slowly craned his neck to see what it was and found a spider resting on his shoulder. A mother spider... with all 1000+ eggs on her back.
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" The poor boy screamed as he made his to open the closet, only to learn he was locked in. His shrieks were being heard from the outside, where a certain goose was still running rampant. And in the chase for the horrible goose, he kicked down a broomstick that landed on top of the closet's lock, which meant the boy in the closet was stuck.
Lock someone in the broom closet. -Done!
Now where to next? Oh, the servant from earlier opened the door to the cooking room! Guess the student wasn't lying earlier, he really is an idiot. Anser stretched out his wings and made a beeline into the kitchen. From there, he knocked over some pots and pans as the cooks and servants tried to catch him. He then caught the ire of the head cook, Marteau. He had an extremely angry expression on his face as he lunged for Anser.
The goose simply leapt back a bit, letting the big man tumble down. He was about to get up when Anser grabbed a rolling pin from the counter and clonked him over the head with it. With Marteau out of commission, he snagged his hat and placed it upon his head.
Make the head cook lose his hat. -Done!
The servants looked on in horror as the goose brought back out his knife and brandished it at them, forcing them to back away from the violent bird.
"Hjönk!" That was a warning. All servants huddled to the back wall as the goose began stuffing a wicker basket full of breakfast foods before leaving. The servants waited a bit, making sure the goose was gone. From there it was a cacophony of voices trying to find order in chaos.
It was a break to the courtyard now. But first, he needed to shake everyone off his tail. And off in the distance, he found the perfect plan. Just a little goosey magic and he'll have everyone hoodwinked. Oh how dastardly!
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Louise was contently eating breakfast at her usual spot when she spotted Anser waddling over the hill. Truth be told, she was thinking about her familiar a lot lately. He seemed to care for her greatly as well as putting those who wronged her in the past in their place. She found the situation with Guiche hysterical and assumed it was he who stole Kirche's wand. She wouldn't reprimand him on either account; those two had it a long time coming. Rumor has it that Guiche is still begging his father to send a replacement. How hilarious.
Anser waddled up to her with a basket filled with breakfast items, mostly everything Louise didn't get.
"You brought these all for me, Anser?"
"Hjönk." Louise smiled warmly at her familiar, who placed the wicker basket behind some bushes for the time being. Louise motioned for him to come closer, to which he then hopped into her lap. She giggled a bit as she petted the goose, blissfully unaware of his actions earlier.
"You know," She started. "All my life, I was told I was a failure at magic, and that no amount of teaching would help me. Over the years, I think I began to accept that as fact and began to lose hope as well... But then you came into my life, Anser. You were my first success. And then that led to another one back in the classroom. Had you not interrupted my spell towards the end, I am certain it would've been another explosion. Thank you, Anser, for everything you've done for me."
"Hjönk..." Anser nuzzled his head on his master's cheek. It was strange, normally he wouldn't have cared about the feelings of a regular human girl, but this one he felt like he had to protect. Was it the strange markings on his wings? Or the strange demand on his mental list? Wouldn't do much good mulling over it now though. Right now, his master needed comfort, and he would have to be that comfort. He didn't have to be horrible all the time. To her at least.
Have a nice, balanced breakfast. -Done!
"There you are you piece of work!" A voice cut the silence. Louise looked up and found an irate student. He was drenched from head to toe, his face was red, and he looked like he was on the verge of tears.
"Oliver? What are you doing here? And who are you calling a piece of work?!"
"That dang goose in your hands, Zero!"
"Anser? But he's been with me the entire time."
"Hjönk?"
"Don't play dumb with me! That beast made a servant spill tea on me, chased me with a knife, and then locked me in a broom closet filled with spiders! I HATE SPIDERS!" The poor boy was getting redder by the second. "I had some water mages douse me to get the spiderlings off, but it was 10 minutes of pure torture!"
"Yeesh, that sounds rough. But Anser couldn't have been the one to do that. He was eating breakfast with me the entire time. I don't appreciate you accusing my familiar of something he didn't commit."
"Oh yeah? What do you expect me to believe, that another goose showed up and caused a ruckus, ruining our lovely morning?!"
"Sir Frant!" A servant called out.
"What is it?!"
"We spotted the culprit!"
"Yes, he's right in front of me!"
"No, not that goose sir! The goose from earlier is swimming away as we speak!"
"WHAT?!"
"Oh? Let's go see for ourselves then, shall we Anser?"
"Hjönk!"
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Sure enough, the servants watched as a white goose wearing a chef's hat and wielding a knife was swimming down the river, now only a small figure in the distance. Oliver fumed in anger at his tormentor getting away while the servants tried to reassure him that they will not fail to capture the goose again. Louise was just glad to see that Anser was innocent. And all the while, the goose in question wished he was able to express human emotions properly so he could smirk evilly.
A little bit after exiting the cafeteria, he had spotted a false goose floating in the pond. He assumed it was put up to attract others or to appease him. Either way, it worked out for him easily. Flame marched over just in time to find Anser struggling to get the statue out of the pond. Their combined strength pulled it out of the pond and they dragged it over to the stream. Flame wondered what was the purpose of the task, to which Anser only gave a curt answer. Flame didn't really care too much, just eager to help his friend in need.
Once in the stream, the two familiars worked to doll up the decoy. Flame helped tie the hat onto its head while Anser slid the knife into its mouth accordingly. With one strong push from both of them, the decoy was off. They ran away from the scene after Anser let out a honk to alert his pursuers, knowing the decoy was too far gone for them to reach.
"Ssah sah sah?"
"Honk Hjönk."
"Ssss... Sah sah. Sah ssiss Sah!"
"Hjönk hjönk honk!"
Flame had already known that his friend would be collecting a lot of stuff, so he asked Sylphid earlier to remove the dam blocking the river from flowing into the burrow. With the dam gone, anything that flowed into the river would make its way back to his stash. Flame reassured his friend that the water would merely pool into a reservoir as the items in the current would simply float in the reservoir. Anser accepted that response and made haste, which Flame's statement proved true.
Happy with how well things turned out, Anser neatly organized his rather fair collection. He then grabbed his wicker basket and set off to find his master. All the while, his pursuers were chasing a fake. And even if someone suspected him, the sight of the fake goose would instantly change their mind. Unfortunately for the students and servants, the game was rigged from the start, and Anser had all the right cards.
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"Are you certain, Professor Colbert?"
"Absolutely. I double-checked my notes and everything. I even got a chance to observe his wing earlier with Miss Valliere's permission."
"Still... what you could be suggesting goes well beyond the realm of blasphemy. You would be tortured to death for implying this!"
"Yet my mind still craves for more information... I will not rest until I figure out why and how a goose of all creatures bears the markings of the legendary Gandalfr..."
As the Headmaster and bald professor spoke, Miss Longueville was eavesdropping for a bit before snickering.
"The Gandalfr as a Goose? What foolishness..." She then turned to face a vault before her. "It matters not. I'll find a way in here, and I WILL take that Staff. It belongs to me, and no Gandalfr or whatever shall stop me..." She walked away, reverting back to her secretary persona. However, a certain white mouse heard everything, but he wasn't able to see who was talking. But he knew just the right person, or fowl, for the job.
"Squee, squeak squeak. Squee squee Squeak!"
"...Hjönk."
"Squeak!"
New To-Do List items:
Find a way into the Academy Vault
Secure the Staff of Destruction
Capture the thief
Steal some treasures
Admittedly, that last part was for himself, but Chu Chu didn't need to know that. All the old mouse wanted was for someone to prevent this thief, whoever it may be, from taking the coveted Staff of Destruction. The name alone sounds like it'll be a blast to use. Anser decided to wait until tomorrow to find out what to do. For now, he'll need a good night's sleep. It's not every day one becomes a Secret Agent.
If you like this story I suggest going to the original source here
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13491406/1/A-Horrible-Familiar
And if you want more like this I suggest going to the original author of this story Tiamatio's home page here
https://www.fanfiction.net/u/10087625/Tiamatio