— An Insider Scoop on All the Best Moments from Taylor Swift's Halloween Party This Year!
— Gigi Hadid Spills the Tea on Taylor Swift's 2016 Halloween Party
— Here are all the major celebs from Taylor Swift's squad who celebrated Halloween with her: From Gigi Hadid to Kaia Browne!
— The Lady in Waiting co-stars Kaia Browne and William Bowery rumoured to be dating!
— English actors Kaia Browne and William Bowery spotted out on a cosy date in downtown New York! Could a new Hollywood relationship be brewing?
— On-Screen Spouses Kaia Browne and William Bowery Reportedly Dating! Do you ship BROWERY?
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Taylor blinked her eyes open and looked around her, feeling quite disoriented. It was already dark outside, she noted, as she glanced outside the living room window. The television had been turned off, leaving the room illuminated by the soft glow of the lamp in the back corner. She was pretty sure she was watching a movie earlier, and the sun had still been up.
She didn't even have a blanket before. Hmm...
Naps were always so weird. Taylor always felt like she was waking up in another dimension or a parallel universe. It was even worse when she was fighting a messy sleeping schedule again.
She heard soft music coming from the kitchen and decided to go investigate. She stretched her arms over her head as she quietly padded down the hall, stopping in the kitchen doorway when she spotted Kaia with her back turned to her, sliding from one end of the kitchen to the other in her brown fuzzy socks with reindeer antlers and a bright red nose. She wasn't wearing anything else besides a giant sweater that reached her knees, with the sleeves rolled up a few times to stay just above her wrists. Taylor smiled widely, leaning her shoulder against the doorframe and simply watching her girlfriend have the time of her life, dancing to a rather upbeat song.
Taylor recognised it halfway through, from the movie Love Actually. It was the song that Hugh Grant danced to, and of course, Kaia had every last dance move from the choreography memorised perfectly. She had a hard time holding in her laughter as Kaia jumped around the kitchen, stopping occasionally to check on whatever she had boiling on the stove.
This is the girl I've fallen in love with...
Taylor beamed widely at the thought. Yeah... Of course, she fell in love with her.
She crossed her arms over her chest as Kaia started to turn around, moving her hips rather tastefully with her arm stretched out and wooden spoon pointed right at...
"AAHH, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST," Kaia yelped as her eyes landed on Taylor. She recovered quite fast, clapping her hands together and grinning widely, though her cheeks were a deep shade of red. "So, I was thinking we could have tomato soup for dinner," she said casually, pointing her thumb behind her back at the large pot on the stove.
"Tomato soup sounds lovely," Taylor responded, pronouncing the word just as Kaia did— tom-ah-to.
Taylor was grinning toothily, hands hanging in the back pockets of her shorts. She quite enjoyed teasing her girlfriend, especially when the opportunities were presented to her so easily. Kaia was not so appreciative, turning around with a little glare and turning her attention back to the soup.
"I thought we were going out, though?" Taylor joined her in the kitchen, slipping into one of the chairs around the dining table.
"We're going out drinking, so we need to eat something first," Kaia chuckled, leaving the soup to simmer and discarding the wooden spoon from her hands.
"Oh? I thought it was just dinner?"
"Yeah... the girls had other plans," Kaia sighed. She didn't sound too pleased about the whole change of plans. "Have you checked the group chat?"
"I just woke up," she shook her head. "We can just stay in if you like," Taylor told her, offering her a little, still sleepy, smile.
"No... I have to go, with Will being there and all. Plus, I need to make sure Mica doesn't make any horrible decisions."
"He's an adult, he can take care of himself," Taylor pointed out, ignoring the small pang in her chest at the mention of William.
He had been around quite a lot in the past few weeks, which wasn't all that bad. But Taylor hated it every single time. She knew she wasn't really sharing Kaia with him or anyone. She knew it. But any time their pictures ended up online the next morning, and the whole world talked about them like they were Hollywood's next greatest couple, she couldn't help the small hints of jealousy that built up deep in the pit of her stomach. She wanted to be able to show her off to the world. And it sucked that she couldn't. It really, really sucked.
"Nah... we'll go. It'll be fun!" Kaia smiled widely and walked over toward Taylor, holding her hand out as a Joni Mitchell song started playing.
Taylor put her hand in Kaia's and let her pull her up to her feet. Kaia placed Taylor's free hand around her shoulder and left her own hand on the blonde's waist, pulling her flush against her.
"Dance with me?" Kaia murmured and Taylor nodded, watching her blue eyes gleam with her smile. She loved that smile so much. She loved how it never failed to warm her heart and leave her completely breathless.
"How was your nap?"
Taylor leaned her chin over Kaia's shoulder, rubbing her back softly with her hand. "It was all right. I woke up feeling like I was abducted by aliens... I still feel like I'm above the clouds."
Kaia breathed out a soft laugh, music to Taylor's ears. "You're such a romantic, aren't you?"
"Well, you're the one who's making me dance with you in the middle of the kitchen to a sad Joni Mitchell song from the Love, Actually soundtrack... I think you're the bigger romantic here."
"And if you tell anyone that I am, you better sleep with one eye open. I know where you live!" Kaia whispered in Taylor's ear, leaving the blonde smirking amusedly.
"It'll be our little secret," she whispered back, leaving a little kiss on Kaia's jaw. She grabbed her hand, twirled her a few times around the kitchen before hugging her from behind. They swayed from side to side, happy and content with the other's company. Taylor kept leaving a bunch of gentle kisses all over Kaia's cheek and the side of her neck until she was a giggling mess.
"Your hair's tickling me!"
"Sorry," Taylor murmured, kissing her one last time. She brushed her hair out of the way before nuzzling Kaia's neck again. "How was that work thing you had earlier?"
"Boring. I would have liked to have stayed here with you," she responded, leaning her weight against Taylor with her back flush against her chest.
"I think I would have preferred that, as well."
"What if we both quit our jobs and just spent every possible moment together?" Kaia asked, turning around in Taylor's arms and leaving her own around her shoulders.
"You'd get bored of me."
"Never," Kaia shook her head. She rested her forehead against Taylor's, still swaying them from side to side to the beat of the song.
"You would. You would eventually realise you'd wanna murder me or something!"
"I would never," Kaia reassured her, brushing her thumb over Taylor's cheek. She leaned in, their lips brushing lightly. "I even dragged you all the way to London with me last week for a three-day trip."
"I'm starting to like it better, anyway."
"Or you just like me too much."
"I do," Taylor said without missing a beat. Kaia chuckled under her breath, closing the distance between them. Taylor kissed her, a small smile playing on her lips. She closed her eyes, moving her thumbs in small circles over Kaia's hips.
They pulled away eventually and Taylor wrapped her arms tightly around the younger girl, hugging her close. Kaia was humming along to the song that was playing, the Beach Boys classic.
"God only knows what I'd be without you..." Kaia sang along in a soft voice, her face buried in Taylor's neck.
"If you should ever leave me, though life would still go on, believe me, the world could show nothing to me, so what good would living do me?" the blonde continued, running her fingers through Kaia's curls. "God only knows what I'd be without you..."
Kaia pressed another kiss on Taylor's mouth, leaving her breathless and speechless and so completely enamoured with her that her limbs turned to jelly. She leaned against the counter behind her, watching as Kaia slipped away to check on the food.
"Are you hungry?" She asked, turning the stove off.
"I could eat," Taylor nodded and went to grab some bowls and spoons.
"So, Anna just said they're all going to meet us here, and we'll all go together. It'll be easier that way... and safer, if they plan on getting absolutely hammered," Kaia explained as they sat at the table eating. She had a little smile on her face as she typed with one hand on her phone, responding to her friends spamming on their group chat.
Taylor felt a little better knowing that at least they weren't going to leave separately for the sake of appearances. They could spend time together, even if they still had to hide. Only Mica and Will were aware of their relationship, and they had both agreed that it was still too early to let anyone else know.
"Who's coming, again?"
"Oh, just Anna, Emilia, Mica, Jules, and Will," Kaia told her, putting her phone away and breaking a piece of bread. She offered the other half to Taylor who shook her head, quietly declining. "You've already met everyone. And then there are your friends."
"Right, I think it's just Gigi, Abby, and Lily. I'll check, hold on..." Taylor grabbed her phone from the table back in the living room, opening the chat with all her friends who were currently spamming as well with plans to pre-game and trying to decide on outfits. She scrolled through all the messages quickly to get a quick idea of who might be coming along. "Oh, Martha's in, I think. That's about it."
"Oh! Great! I love Martha!"
"You have a thing for blondes, don't you?"
Kaia looked up, her lip twitching in a small smirk. "Especially leggy ones. Bonus points if she has blue eyes."
"What about these legs?" Taylor lifted her right leg up over Kaia's knee, putting it on full display. Kaia ran her hand all the way from her ankle up to the bottom of the shorts she was in.
"Hm, I hear they're worth a few million dollars," Kaia played along, which Taylor expected. What she wasn't expecting was her girlfriend bending down and playfully biting her leg.
Taylor had to swallow back a giggle as she swatted the back of Kaia's head gently. "Hey, I can sue you for that! I almost sued Meredith once for this scar!" She pointed at a very thin white line that went across her thigh, just below the spot with Kaia's teeth marks.
"Oh, no! Not your own child... who is a cat!" Kaia laughed, leaving a gentle kiss on the spot again, and another one on the scar that had been left there by Meredith. She brushed her finger over a much older scar on Taylor's knee from that time she had slipped at the pool when she was six years old and grazed her knee on the concrete floor, leaving yet another kiss in her wake.
Taylor took in a deep breath, her stomach twisting as she met Kaia's hooded eyes, looking up at her through her long lashes. The same look that would definitely bring her undoing. "Kaia..."
"Mhm?" she hummed in response, caressing Taylor's leg with delicate fingers, leaving goosebumps behind.
"Baby..." she whispered, swallowing hard. At this rate, they weren't going to make it to that damned bar. Taylor couldn't even get herself to drop her leg down. She really didn't want this to stop, even though she knew they should if they wanted to leave this apartment soon. They still needed to get dressed.
Kaia leaned in, her face only inches away from Taylor's when the buzzer sounded around the apartment, loud and annoying.
"Mr Langford's here," Greg's voice rang through the apartment, and with a heavy sigh, Kaia pushed Taylor's leg off, but she kept her hand on her thigh, drawing soft circles on her skin with the side of her thumb.
"Why are you early?" Kaia demanded as soon as Mica appeared in the kitchen.
"Uhm... Hi?" He waved awkwardly, pulling the beanie covering his hair off. "I thought we said we were meeting here at seven? It's a quarter past seven. Why aren't you guys ready?"
Taylor shrugged in the direction of their plates. "Do you want some soup?" She offered, holding up a spoonful to her mouth from the long-forgotten bowl.
"No, thank you," he chuckled, grabbing a piece of bread instead and breaking off a small chunk. "Are you guys going out in your pyjamas? Like, I'm not judging, I'm just wondering, you know, in case everyone else shows up and starts asking questions—"
"I just need a minute," Kaia rolled her eyes and casually munched on some bread dipped in the tomato soup. "We'll just tell them I came early to hang out, in case they got here on time. Which they won't. They're always late."
"You came here early to hang out in nothing but your underwear and an old shirt that barely covers your bum?" Mica pointed out with his mouth full. "That sounds a little suspicious if you ask me."
"Dude—" Kaia sighed and pulled herself up. "You're insufferable!" She flipped him off on her way out, her feet stomping heavily on the stairs.
"She's never going to forgive you for not letting her finish her dinner," Taylor chuckled, swallowing another spoonful.
"Meh, she'll get over it!" He shrugged, a playful glint in his green eyes.
"Miss Swift, the rest of the party are on their way up," Greg called in on the intercom.
"Oh... they're early," Mica chuckled, looking at Taylor expectantly, waiting for her to make a decision.
"Would you mind hosting for a minute? I'm kinda... well, this is going to be awkward," she said, dusting off her hands as she got up. She took the plates and left them in the sink, leaving the dishes till the morning.
"Sure, go on upstairs," he told her, getting up to go stand in the entryway and greet his and Kaia's friends.
Taylor had only met them a handful of times, and she liked them well enough, but she wasn't sure she wanted them to see her in this state. And she really wasn't in the best mood to host people.
She dashed upstairs when she heard the elevator doors ding, jumping over Olivia who was sprawled at the bottom of the staircase. She knocked softly on their bedroom door before slipping inside and closing the door behind her once again. Kaia was in the bathroom, the shower running and steaming up the room as she had left the door open a crack.
"Is Katara still hiding behind the toilet?" Taylor chuckled, poking her head into the bathroom and spotting the white cat curled up indeed behind the toilet.
"Yeah, I'm not sure why she likes it so much," Kaia replied from behind the shower curtain. "Probably because your cats never find her here. She'll get used to the house eventually."
"She's been hiding there for a week, babe," Taylor laughed, crouching down to the cat's level to try and pet her. Katara was pretty stiff but didn't try to run away. "She only ever comes out to eat and poop."
"At least she's coming out to eat and poop!"
That was fair.
Taylor went back into the room, picking out an outfit quickly and laying it out neatly on the bed before slipping into the bathroom again. She tossed her clothes into the hamper and tied her hair up in a bun before joining Kaia in the shower.
"Sorry to intrude, but your friends are here so we have to be quick," Taylor apologised, leaving a little kiss on Kaia's shoulder and reaching past her to grab the bottle of shower gel.
"There are other bathrooms in this apartment," Kaia noted, though she didn't really care. They had shared the bathroom together on several occasions already.
"Well, this one comes with you," Taylor grinned crookedly, leaving another kiss on Kaia's cheek when she reached again to grab her loofa.
"I can't argue with that," Kaia laughed, turning around and pecking Taylor's lips. "I'm done, anyway!"
Kaia grabbed Taylor's hips and pushed her out of the way so she could step out of the shower, leaving Taylor's skin tingling at her touch. She washed her body quickly and wrapped a towel around herself to dry off as she washed her face and brushed her teeth. She then applied a light layer of make-up, focusing mostly on the mascara and the shade of lipstick before making her way back into the bedroom.
She didn't feel like overdressing tonight, so she settled on a pair of black jeans and a simple rustic orange cropped sweater. As she slipped on her ankle boots, she glanced up and found Kaia still looking through the closet, moving one hanger after the other aside.
"Try that blouse on," Taylor suggested when Kaia was just about to push away one of the blonde's shirts.
"That one? I'm not sure..."
"It'd look great on you!" Taylor insisted, standing up to her full height and walking over to the wardrobe to help her out. "Tuck it like, half in, and keep the first few buttons undone... you would look gorgeous!"
"Baby..." Kaia turned around to smile at Taylor, placing her hand flat on the blonde's chest. "You forget that I have no cleavage. My boobs cannot handle it."
Taylor let out a small snort, glancing down at her girlfriend's chest in the lace bralette she had on. "Suit yourself. I still think you'd look hot."
She pressed a kiss on Kaia's temple and grabbed her purse from the armchair in the corner of the room. "I'm going to head downstairs and try and entertain your guests till you're done. Don't take too long!"
"I won't," Kaia promised, squeezing Taylor's hand just before she left to make her way back downstairs.
The girls were laughing loudly in the living room. She steeled herself with one deep breath and stepped inside, sending everyone a little smile.
"Hey! How are you guys?" She started, using her friendliest voice. She really wanted Kaia's friends to like her. Sure, they had hung out before, but it mattered to her even more now.
"Oh my god, Taylor! I absolutely adore your place!" Emilia started, standing up to greet the blonde first.
"Oh... thank you!" She was taken aback by the warm hug the dark-haired actress offered but accepted it anyway. "I'm sorry I kept you guys waiting a bit. I kinda napped and overslept earlier... can I get you guys anything to drink?"
"Oh, I took the liberty of raiding your liquor cabinet and grabbed the bottle of vodka," Mica told her with a small, mischievous grin. She noticed the shot glasses on the coffee table and shook her head lightly at the man's antics.
"You're too much," she told him with a small sigh, settling down on the armchair.
"Where's Kibs?" Anna asked, clicking her tongue in frustration. "How long does one need to touch up her make-up?"
Was that what Mica had told them?
"Oh, I think she's changing her outfit actually," Taylor told them with a slight shrug. It wasn't entirely a lie, was it? "I don't know. She should be down in a minute."
Sure enough, Kaia came rushing down a moment later with her Doc Martens in hand. She had taken Taylor's advice and worn the white blouse that did in fact compliment her perfectly.
"Bonsoir! Hi! Hello! Sorry I'm late! Had to get changed and stuff," Kaia told them vaguely as she stumbled into the room and flopped down in the very tight space next to Taylor. They used the same excuse which made the blonde smile to herself. "Also, sorry we had to rendezvous here. It's just closer to the club."
"Oh, no, it's great if we have a designated driver," Emilia responded, running her hand through her long hair. "I can get fucking plastered for once!"
"That is great, yes!" Will nodded, dropping his arm over Emilia's shoulders. "But also, babe... you almost always get plastered anyways."
"Oh, here's the thing," Kaia interjected once she had tied her laces and stood back up. "Tay's friends don't exactly know that Will and I are doing a publicity thing or that I'm not into guys, and you guys know because you're already aware of the fact that I am very gay and would never actually date a man, so don't get too drunk and fuck this up for us! Thanks."
"I'll just keep my hands off my boyfriend all night and hang out with you instead," Emilia told her with a light laugh, walking over to Kaia to squish her in a hug. "I miss you, you dickhead!"
She did sound genuinely okay with the whole matter, which Taylor couldn't understand. She had to be a little bit upset that she had to hide her relationship. Or maybe she was normal and Taylor was just insane.
"I miss you too, Mills," Kaia laughed, hugging her friend back.
"Question," Jules started as they all filed into the elevator. "How come we're joining the two groups of friends tonight? It's a little odd, if I'm completely honest."
She wasn't wrong.
"I practically begged Taylor to let me hang out with her friends again," Mica replied, which was true. He was in town for another two days only and wanted to have another fun night with the group. It just so happened that Kaia's friends were also in town and wanted to go out. The two girls figured this would be a great opportunity to find out if their friends could actually get along. They were both chaotic in their own ways, so they guessed the night was probably going to end ablaze. "I literally had the time of my life with them in Rhode Island!"
"Sounds about right," Will chuckled, clapping Mica's shoulder.
They all filed into the large SUV with Mica, Taylor, and Kaia smushed in the very back while Greg drove them to the club. During the whole car ride over, as everyone in the front sang loudly to all the songs that came up on the radio, Taylor laced her fingers through Kaia's, squeezing her hand every once in a while for comfort. She knew she didn't have to be so anxious, but she couldn't help it.
When the car rolled to a stop, Kaia turned to smile at Taylor, giving her hand three small squeezes before letting go. She sent her a subtle nod, reassuring her that it was going to be okay as she jumped onto the sidewalk. Taylor lingered back as Emilia, Jules, and Anna walked inside first, followed by Kaia and Will who had his arm around her waist. She looked away immediately only for Mica to wrap his arms around her comfortingly, beaming brightly like a child on Christmas morning.
"Allons-y, chérie. Don't think too much. It'll be a fun night," he reassured her, planting a kiss on her cheek as they stepped inside. Taylor leaned into him for comfort, letting out a deep sigh. She hoped he was right.
They found Abby, Gigi, and Martha already sitting at their reserved table and nursing a drink each.
"YOU GUYS HAVE PINK HAIR!" Gigi exclaimed as soon as she saw Mica and Kaia walk in.
Well, Taylor was ready for them to be the fascination of the night. Especially Kaia. All eyes are always on her.
"Aaah! Oh my god! We do!" Mica responded excitedly, moving to give each of the girls a quick hug. "Your job tonight is to convince T to dye her hair as well."
"Never gonna happen," Taylor shook her head, plastering on a laidback smile and giving her friends a proper greeting. She flopped down in the empty spot next to Abby, giving her one extra "I miss you" squeeze. "Where's Lil?"
"She should be on her way," Martha shrugged, taking back a sip from her very bright drink. Oh, these girls were getting absolutely black-out drunk tonight.
It might not have been such a bad idea...
Taylor glanced up when she felt a hand on her shoulder and saw Kaia literally push Anna away before taking the seat right next to her. The blonde actress didn't seem to care all that much, taking the spot between Gigi and Emilia instead.
"You know, it does look a little suspicious when you force people out of their seats to sit next to me," Taylor leaned in to whisper in her ear.
Kaia smirked coyly, shrugging casually as she leaned back in her seat to rest her jacket on the back of her chair, and murmur back, "well, you should have thought about saving me the seat in the first place."
"Hey!" They both looked up at Jules who was wiggling her pointer finger in their direction. "What are you two gossiping about over there? No side conversations tonight! No secrets!"
"Okay, then," Kaia chuckled, nonchalant, and leaned over the table, hand under her chin, and she gave the model her full, undivided attention. One of her eyebrows arched up, and her lips spread in a smile. Her eyes gleamed in the dimly lit room, in that same way that made Taylor so captivated and drawn to her the first time they had met. This time though, Kaia was putting it on for show on purpose, and Taylor knew no one in the room would be able to handle that look. She knew she would be weak at the knees if she had been looking right at her.
"What were you talking about just now, then?" Kaia asked, her voice almost breathy, and Taylor wound her jaw tightly shut, turning to look at her girlfriend with a little frown, but she wasn't breaking eye contact with her friend.
"Okay, wow," the model laughed, smoothing her hair over her shoulder. "Didn't think you'd get this flirty while still sober. It always took at least three drinks first."
Kaia leaned back in her seat, a smug expression on her face, but she remained quiet, trying to look ambiguous and enthralling. It worked.
"Give her a drink or two and she will definitely change your world," Mica butted in with a little amused grin.
"Well, then! Where's the waiter?" Gigi laughed, glancing around the room in search of anyone in a black button-down and an apron.
Taylor hadn't noticed how tense she had gotten until Kaia's hand dropped on her thigh under the table and started softly rubbing it. She let herself relax, taking in a deep breath and feeling her jaw unclench. Kaia was reassuring her that they were okay. That she was only acting. And this was all a stupid game they had to get through.
Kaia didn't remove her hand, and Taylor was grateful for it, even when their whole party had finally arrived, and when they had ordered their drinks, and when the girls had decided to grill Kaia and Will about their supposed relationship and Will had to rest his arm on the back of Kaia's chair.
But eventually, most of the girls were dragged to dance by Mica, but Taylor quietly declined, choosing to remain seated at the table with Will, who was apparently not much of a dancer, and Abigail, whom Taylor suspected had only stayed there for her sake.
"You're awfully quiet tonight," she noted, leaning in so they could hear each other better over the music without having to strain their voices.
"I'm not!"
Abby chuckled and took a quick sip from her glass. Taylor did the same, except her sip was much bigger.
"So... what's the deal with, ah," Abby started, and then while pointing with her chin in the direction of Will, sitting a few seats away, she continued in a much quieter voice. Taylor would have missed it if she hadn't been sitting so close. "I mean, I'm not about to make assumptions but, I kinda thought she was like, very gay."
"Well, apparently not," Taylor murmured back with a stiff shrug of her shoulders. She glanced across the dance floor at Kaia with her arms wrapped around Mica, both of them already pretty drunk and laughing hard as they jumped around.
It was as though Kaia had felt Taylor watching her because she glanced back and sent her a brilliant smile, a smile she reserved just for her.
"Tay, I'm not an idiot. She is staring right at you right now and you're grinning like a fool," Abby deadpanned. "What's going on with you guys? The last time we talked about this extensively, I thought you said you wanted more."
"I know," she replied softly, peeling her eyes away from the only person in this entire room shining brightly and turning to her best friend. "It's not that easy."
"Taylor," Abigail said, searching her friend's face for any hints with her own concerned eyes. "What's going on, babe?"
"Nothing, it's cool," she said with a dry laugh. She was lying through her teeth to her oldest and closest friend and a pang of guilt sprang through her chest. But she couldn't get herself to admit anything out loud.
She knew she could trust Abby with her life, but she was so scared... God, she was terrified that she could break the small bubble of peace they had found together with the slightest hints of reality.
"Is it?" Abigail didn't seem so convinced. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," Taylor said with a roll of her eyes. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"I don't know..."
Taylor's lips spread in a tight smile and she downed the rest of her drink. "Do you want another cocktail?"
"I— yeah, sure. I'll come with you," the strawberry blonde sighed. "William, would you like anything to drink?"
"Thank you, girls. I'm all set!" He tapped the side of his whiskey tumbler, still mostly full.
The two girls sat at the bar ad they waited for their drinks, watching their friends make fools of themselves in the middle of the club while having the time of their lives.
"So... you guys aren't seeing each other? Like at all?"
Taylor dropped her head in her hands. "Abby... why does it matter?"
"Because you've looked miserable all night, and I'm just trying to understand why so that I could help you because you're my friend and I love you."
Taylor looked up at her friend and let out a heavy breath before dropping her forehead on her shoulder.
"Your drinks, ladies!"
"Thank you," Abby told the bartender as she grabbed the two glasses and handed one to Taylor. "Let's get some fresh air?"
Taylor followed her friend outside and they sat on the sidewalk, taking in deep breaths of cool, fresh air. It was much calmer outside, but her ears were still ringing from the loud electronic music that had been playing inside.
"They're not— they're not actually dating," Taylor started, feeling a shiver run down her spine. She should have grabbed her jacket on her way out. She hoped the rum in her drink would warm her up well enough.
"I figured," Abby chuckled, bumping her knees with Taylor's. "So, they're just doing a publicity thing?"
"Yeah, Tree's idea. I hate it if you can't already tell," she chuckled bitterly and chewed on her swirly straw.
"Because it hurts seeing her with someone else?"
Taylor shook her head. "Because I can't hold her in public the way he's being forced to."
Abigail's eyebrows slowly started to rise as realisation hit her. "So, you guys are...?"
"It was a month on the twenty-eighth, yep..."
"Oh my god, Taylor! That was last week!" Abby exclaimed with a wide grin, instantly wrapping her up in a warm hug. "So, that's why you guys were acting weird at the Halloween party! Why the hell wouldn't you tell me?"
"I haven't told anyone," Taylor muttered, leaning into her friend's comforting touch. "The only people who know are Tree, Kaia's publicist, Kaia's dad and her sister, Mica, and you... and well, Will, but he's under like contracts and shit."
"You little shit! Why wouldn't you tell me? Or your mom? You haven't even told Andrea?"
Taylor shook her head; the guilt had already been eating her up for so long. She didn't need a reminder.
"I was going to, but then a fucking blackmailing photographer happened, and we had to deal with that, so the whole William thing happened as a coverup, and now I'm just..." She cut herself off and exhaled heavily, watching how her breath came out in a small cloud of smoke.
"I'm so sorry, Tay, god," Abigail whispered, engulfing her friend in another hug. "That must have been horrible."
"I guess. It's not the first time but... it's different. With Kaia, everything's different."
"You love her," Abby guessed, a small smile on her face.
Taylor couldn't even lie. She nodded slowly. "Yeah... I think I have for a very long time now. I'm just... I want this to work out. I don't think I would be able to recover if she ever— if we—"
"You'll be okay," Abby reassured her, squeezing her shoulder. "I've seen the way she looks at you. It's like there's no one else in the room but you. I don't think she's ever walking away willingly."
"I hope you're right," Taylor laughed softly, turning her gaze up toward the dark sky. "She might be the best thing that's ever happened to me."
The door behind them burst open and Anna stumbled out followed by Lily and Kaia.
"Oh, there you guys are! How do we feel about shots?" Kaia asked with a little mischievous grin.
"We love 'em!" Abigail chuckled, raising her cocktail up and standing up to go back inside.
Kaia lingered back, holding the door open for everyone and when Taylor stopped by her side, she grabbed her hand and squeezed it softly. "Everything okay, darling?"
"Yeah, it got a little stuffy in there," Taylor told her with a nod. "Also, I just told Abby."
Kaia was a little surprised, and definitely already too drunk to process this. "Oh, wow, that's great, baby! She deserves to know."
"Yeah, I trust her."
Kaia smiled widely at Taylor and snuck a quick peck on her cheek. "Great, then. Hey?"
"Yeah?"
"Have I told you that you look absolutely magnificent tonight?"
A blush crept up Taylor's neck, all the way to the tips of her ears. "You're the one who's got all eyes on her."
"It's only because they can't keep their eyes on you for too long! You're too stunning."
And with that, Kaia wormed her way through the crowd back to their table, leaving Taylor completely dumbstruck with a hammering heart in her chest. She was going to give her a heart attack one of these days.
As the night went along, Taylor slowly got more and more drunk until they were all a laughing mess with no idea what they found so funny. But it was fun, every time she shared a secret moment with Kaia in the crowded room, a small brush of their fingers, a whisper here and there, a shared, knowing look... her stomach fluttered with butterflies. She loved her so dearly, she wanted the whole world to know. And she loved her so dearly, that she was afraid of the world figuring out their little secret. It wasn't exactly easy for her to handle the conflicting emotions.
It was late at night when they were all too drunk and exhausted to keep on going and they found their way out onto the main street where their respective designated drivers were already waiting in their cars.
"Kibs, are you going back to your flat?" Anna asked as they all jumped into the back of the car.
"Tay, can I crash over?" Abby asked at the same time.
"Oh, uh..."
"Ah..."
Kaia and Taylor shared an awkward look. They were both too inebriated to make any sound decisions right now.
"Sweetheart, why don't you come with me? It's not safe," Will decided. How was he the only sober one? "Right, okay, we'll drop you girls off at your hotel first, then, how about that?"
"Aww, he's so sweet!" Martha cooed, leaning against Gigi for support.
"Ah, even when you're sloshed, you still need to work?" Taylor heard Anna ask Kaia who only shrugged and nodded. She didn't trust herself to talk either.
"Taylor?"
"Right... yeah, you can stay over, Abby," she turned to her friend and gave her a little smile.
"Okay, that's settled then!" Will clapped his hands and helped Emilia and Anna into the back of the SUV that Greg was driving.
"I'll see you home," Kaia whispered in her ear right before she got into the car and Will closed the door behind her. She watched Mica climb into the front seat and then gave her guard a look that made him straighten up and nod once. He would make sure she got home safe.
Taylor followed Abby into the other car that Robin was driving after saying goodbye to the other models and they all went their separate ways. In the backseat of the sedan, Taylor leaned her head against Abigail's shoulder and closed her eyes.
"You tired?" Abby asked halfway through a yawn.
"I'm fine," Taylor murmured, letting out a deep breath. She rubbed her face with her hands, feeling her eyes start to sting a little.
"Taylor?"
She hadn't noticed that her eyes had started tearing up until Abigail had called her name and offered her a tissue. And Taylor couldn't stop. The tears never stopped coming, and the sobs kept forcing their way out of her tight throat.
"Shh, it's okay," Abby whispered, wrapping her up in her arms tightly. "You're okay."
Taylor shook her head, holding on to the back of her friend's shirt tightly. "I don't— I don't wanna have to keep secrets just so that— so we won't have to— so that I don't lose her."
"I know, honey, I know," Abby murmured softly, rubbing Taylor's back gently. "It's gonna be okay."
"You can't know that for sure," Taylor cried, a small hiccup making her jump. "Shit, I'm so sorry. I'm getting snot all over your top."
"It's okay," Abby laughed, handing her another tissue. "It was going in the laundry anyway."
Taylor nodded and blew her nose, even when the tears still kept coming. "Abby, I— I'm so scared. I don't wanna lose her. She has to go through so much shit just to be able to be with me in peace and— it's not even peace. I can never give her peace. She— she's going to hate me for it."
"No, she's not, Tay. She loves you," Abby murmured softly, hugging her closer.
"You don't know that!"
"Trust me on this?"
"What if she wakes up one day and decides she doesn't want to put up with all this bullshit anymore? Because it's really not worth it. I'm not wo—" Taylor started to say instead but Abigail interrupted her.
"Taylor Alison Swift, don't you even dare finish that sentence. I will call your mother and make her knock some sense into you."
"Don't wake her up," Taylor muttered, glaring at her friend for not letting her be self-deprecating.
"Tay, seriously, as your best friend, I can assure you that you're just being an idiot right now. Your fears are valid, but Kaia's also not that kinda person."
"I can never give her a normal life," Taylor murmured, sniffling softly as a tear slid down the side of her nose. She wiped it with the back of her hand and closed her eyes again, trying to focus on her breathing to calm herself down.
"Well, maybe she doesn't want a normal life."
Taylor remained silent the rest of the way home, apart for the occasional sob she couldn't swallow back.
She couldn't know what Kaia wanted without asking her. But she couldn't shake off her anxieties either.
Abby sighed softly and wrapped her arm
around Taylor's shoulder, pulling her close and trying to comfort her the rest of the way.
"I'm literally such a baby."
"A cute one," Abby laughed softly, squeezing Taylor gently. She scrunched her nose, sniffling again, and staring out the window as the New York lights zipped past them in the quiet of the night.