READ END NOTES PLS
Songs: Come as You Are by Yuna
Bated Breath by Tinashe
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"Breath Char!" Ki snaps as I take a deep breath attempting to steady my heart rate slightly. I swear I'm about to have a breakdown, the adrenaline is running through my body so fast I feel like I'm either going to punch somebody in the face or pass out into a messy pile on the floor; most likely the latter. I take a few shaky breaths, my hands resting either side of the white basin in the polished bathrooms not too far away from the place I've just basically marched away from.
"I think I want to leave." I mumble after a few minutes silence and contemplating the idea in my head. Kiara furrows her eyebrows and looks fairly shocked as well as disappointment at my statement.
"We've got everybody here and you just want to go home because of one person?" She asks, one eyebrow raised, her serious face making me uncomfortable as I shift my gaze from her to the marble by my hands.
"Yes....No. I want to be away from him right now." I mumble shyly my finger drawing an invisible pattern on the counter top.
"For the last three months you've wanted nothing more than to fucking be near him!" Kia snaps loudly, her eyes rolling and the harsh tine she uses hitting me like a slap to the face. Ki never shouts at me like this. I'm not liking it. "I've heard nothing more than how it hurts you, how you're empty and now he's here and you want to leave? I'm done with you, you're confusing as fuck and I'm sorry but I haven't got time for your dumbass decision changing." I roll my eyes a small wave of anger washing over me with her obvious lies. Yes, I may have felt sorry for myself, but not for long. I mention Justin once or twice per day at most but I feel as though it's more 'out of sight out of mind'. Kiara keeps ping on with her rant, her annoyingly high pitched babbles making me want to walk straight out of here and to home where I can curl up in bed and watch movies all night.
"Shut up..." I groan my fingers massaging my temples softly hearing Kia huff, we're not like this.
"The most annoying thing is that through everything, you and Alex have been all over each other." Kiara grumbles to herself as I glare at her.
"I'm not sure if this is some motivational...thing or something like that, but I suggest you take a seat and quit telling me what to do. You know, I've really tried and it's just a bit of a shock when somebody I had never expected to see again turns up at my birthday party. So it'd be greatly appreciated if you could either be a good friend and not shout at me right now or you can go fuck yourself." I speak slowly, my hands shaking a little as I purse my lips, not dropping my eyes from Kiara's for a second.
We end up in silence as I tap my foot against the floor. Maybe, I'd simply drank more than I thought and...no, that doesn't work otherwise Ki wouldn't have seen Him too. Maybe I should... I don't even know what I'm thinking anymore. "I'm sorry for snapping." I mumble shyly, my toe twisting into the floor where my eyes were fixated.
"It was unfair of me." Kia replies sheepishly as we both fall back into silence. I was beginning to become restless now and the thought of Justin possible waiting outside the bathroom, or being out there terrifies me. This was too much of a birthday surprise. The last thing he said to me was 'I love you', I thought he was just saying it because he felt bad for me; now that he's here, out of the blue, it's making me question that.
I don't know how I feel about the whole thing, which makes me very... touchy on the subject, push me the wrong way with this and I think I might explode like a bomb. I'm terrified of seeing Justin because I'm not sure how I'll react. Half of me thinks I might slap him in the face and tell him how much of a douchebag he is for sleeping (or at least going out) with all of those tall, blonde model chicks; the other half thinks I might just burst into tears and jump into his arms, I'm not really happy with either of those reactions right now.
Justin Bieber confuses my emotions.
"Okay, you leave right now, get Alex to drive you or something (I don't think he's drinking), then I'll tell everybody to some to yours in like and hour or two so that he doesn't notice you've gone." Kiara explains to me her eyes wide and a small proud smile appears on her lips as she looks at me for approval.
"Can't I just go?" I ask my voice very quiet and sheepish as though I'm Jamie's age. "You and the girls can come a little later but I just wanna be alone for a little while and I don't want to ruin it for everybody." I explain grasping my bottom lip between my teeth and nibbling on it nervously. Kiara nods a small sympathetic smile on her lips, whispering a small barely audible 'okay' and I suddenly feel a little better.
I swear we have a bipolar relationship. One minute we're yelling at each other about something stupid the next thing I know I'm being hugged so tight I can barely breath. "This is dumb." Kiara repeats as she squishes me close to her in her half drunken state. I simply laugh at her as she continues to go on about how she hopes my day wasn't ruined by all this drama etc. etc. My birthday was anything but ruined, I was just a little shocked and filled with something I've never really felt before to cope with this all right now.
I sneak my way out if the bathrooms my body quickly colliding with somebodies because I was too focused on everybody but the people in front of me. The person quickly grasps my wrist steadying me in my place as I make a small 'oomf' noise. I'm 22, what? Really? "You okay there?" Alex's voice asks loudly as I nod absentmindedly and tucking a strand of my straight hair behind my ear. "You don't look it, you sure?" Alex asks making me roll my eyes.
"I'm fine!" I snap my eyes flicking to the people that were moving to the loud music around us, checking I see if Justin was there. "I just wanna go home." I mumble making my way to the entrance/exit of Crystal the blue strobe lights flashing through the dark room where the floor was practically shaking with the bass of the music. I could feel Alex's presence behind me with each small step I took until the clouded class door was opened for me and the light returned I a normal level an the loud music was somewhat muted.
"Let me drive you." Al offered making my cheeks heat up before I nod biting the inside of my lip. It's wrong to blush at things your boss says, right?
Without any further questions Alex leads me tithe valet where he hand over the ticket and waits for his car to be brought back to him. Alex never asks more questions than he needs to, if I wanted to talk I know I can but he wouldn't push me for answers; he's just not that type of person.
As the valet pulls up with Al's car I spot a few flashes going off in the distance and they make me roll my eyes in annoyance. Every now and then there's a few paparazzi following me, I guess to see who exactly 'Justin Biebers Chick' is. It's hilarious.
We drive home, me singing every song that came on the radio badly; the whole thing making Alex laugh his ass off and I'm pretty sure he even recorded some I it, lord knows how.
Half an hour later we arrived outside of my apartment building. I was halfway through humming and mumbling Come As You Are by Yuna. Alex parking across the street as I sit awkwardly my fingers fiddling softly in my lap. "Sure, you're okay?" Alex asks again as I nod my head shrugging it off.
"Let me go and sip on my wine and eat chocolates and I'll be fine, I promise." I half joke causing a small awkward laugh to come from both of us.
I lean over the middle section of the car and wrap my arms around his body as Alex did the same. "Happy birthday, Charlie." Alex cheers in my ear, his soft breath tickling my neck causing me to squirm in his arms a little.
I'm not sure quite happens but the next thing I know Alex's hand is tangled up in my hair, our lips moulding together almost so perfectly it sends a fire racing through my senses as a single chill runs down my spine. My fingers grip his shirt tightly before we both pull away panting for air, my face hovering by his for a second as my cheeks burn a crimson colour and my hands go clammy. "uh, thanks... for the ride. I-I-I'll see you next week." I stutter Picking up my clutch bag which rested in my lap and reaching for the door handle and mumbling a small "Bye." as I climbed out shyly.
What the fuck just happened?
I know I'm dumb when it comes to these things but... it is wrong to kiss your boss. Right? I shouldn't have enjoyed that a much as I just did, right?
I walk into the building, waving softly to Alex who watched to make sure I got inside safely. Christ, I still feel like my cheeks are on fire. I tap my foot against the tiled floor, humming the tune of Tourist by Yuna (I'm obsessed with her songs right now) as I wait for the elevator to arrive.
Soon the elevator opens and I step in ignoring the annoyed looking guy, who had a single bead of sweat rolling down his forehead (ew), although he does look vaguely familiar. I swear I know him from somewhere. My mind fizzes as I gingerly press the button to my floor, floor 12, and wait for the elevator to arrive at my level whilst side eyeing the huge guy beside me. I do know him, I swear.
The doors eventually open with a small 'ping' and I step out of the annoyingly small mirrored box spotting the large '12' sign not too far com the elevator. I head straight down the hall to the other side of the building which overlooked the marina and unlocked my large wooden door.
As soon as I opened my door a wave of calmness washed over me and my little 'mental zen' as Aali had called it, returned. I kick off my heels leaving them scattered not too far away from the door as I padded my way through the apartment. I flicked on several of the lamps as I went to the large silver fridge and pulled out a bottle of wine, pouring myself a glass. I then went out to stand on y balcony, the heat immediately surrounding my body in a suffocating grip. Yup, still not getting any cooler.
I stood by the balcony railing, my arms resting on the warm metal bar as I sipped on my wine and watched the small decorated boats sail silently past me one by one. When My glass is empty I wonder back inside, shrugging off the deep red jacket I had thrown on over my fairly revealing outfit and grabbed my blanket from th bottom of the couch.
I can go from smart as hell to lazy as fuck in three minutes straight, I swear.
I patiently wait for the TV to turn on as I snuggle into the corner of the couch, grinning to myself when Keeping Up With The Kardashians appeared.
J POV
"What, you're just gonna walk up to her apartment and be like 'hi'?" Za asked and I swear I can feel his scowl and mimed 'what the fuck' in my head. Yup, definitely been around him too much.
"What else can I do?" I ask gesturing out to the space in front of me. "She disappeared from the club like ten minutes after she saw me and I doubt she's went to her parents house at... almost midnight." I sigh, slumping back in my seat as I check the time.
"Ever thought that she doesn't want to see you?" Za asks as a quiet groan escapes my lips, I vaguely hear Atifa scold him in the background slapping Za's chest like she always does. The thought crossed my mind two or three times on the endless plane ride over here (that actually had to be on two different flights), but I never seriously thought about it until now. Maybe she didn't. "Yo Justin man?" Za asked as I ran my hand over my face harshly. "You still there?"
"Yeah, I'm here." I speak quietly, my mind wondering as to whether Charlie actually ever wants to see me. "She will want to. I know she will." I mutter but it's more for my own benefit than anybody else's. "I'll call you later." I mutter narrowing my eyes at the guy parked on the opposite side of the road to me, running his fingers through his fairly long blonde hair as he checked himself in the mirror of his car. I know him. "You guys go back to the hotel, I'll be fine here." I instruct Hugo and Mikey who look confused but nod apprehensively.
I climb out the car, slamming the door behind me. Attempting not to be killed whilst crossing the road was challenging but I made it my eyes still scanning the area for blonde guy and his nice sports car. Who are you? My mind wonders, but before I can think properly my fingers are dancing across the keypad, typing in the code that allowed me access to the building.
The elevator was the tensest few moments of my life - and not just because I'm claustrophobic. I stand outside the large oak door to Charlie's apartment for at least half an hour, I can hear the mumbles of the TV and until 20 minutes who I could hear Char's mumbles as she pads her way around her apartment. Would it be weird if I jut walked in?
I pull the small silver key I had cut out of my pocket and roll it through my fingers. I guess, it's not breaking and entering if you're paying for it and you don't actually break anything to get in. I slide the key into the door and my fingers go to twist it an open the door when my head gets the better of me.
If I wanna do this I should do it properly, not make myself look like a total creep. I slide the key out of the door an slide it back into my pocket. I'll use it as a last resort.
I let my hand hit the wood four times, my heart pounding in my chest. Damn, I'm so nervous. I hear some shuffles on the other side of the door. I hear Charlotte groan a little, the noise making my stomach flip, shit shit shit. What if she really didn't want to be anywhere near me? I begin to fidget in my spot my hand reaching out to knock on the door again and hearing Char shout something. "Really Rafa? You couldn't have picked up your keys?" She snaps as I hold my breath. Who the fuck is Raf? Shit, if she's moved on.....
The door rattles a little bit and I hear Char huff, my hand becoming clammy as I anxiously wait for her to open the door, too afraid that if I speak she might just walk away. "I gave you a fucking key and everything." Char mutters as the door slowly opens. Her hair is long, blonde at the ends and straight; I know I seen her an hour ago but she looks so much more beautiful now than she did then; maybe its the fact I can see her properly. Her hairs so long and... different. Its dark at the top but blonde at the ends and the heavy sigh that escapes her lips makes my heart jump.
"Hi..." I breath my eyes fixated on her as she stares at me wide eyed and slightly confused. I see her pout slightly, her lips parings as she narrows her eyes. Without a seconds warning the door is slammed shut in my face, making me stare at it wide eyed. "Charlotte..." I groan my arm reaching out to hold onto the door frame and my head falling to rest on my bicep. "Let me talk to you...please." I whine through the door like a twelve year old but like usual, I want my way, and I always get my way.
"Fine." I huff, pudding out my cheeks as I take a seat in the cold marble floor. She can avoid me all she likes but at some point or other that door is gonna open and Im gonna be in there. If she wants to be angry and bipolar, that's fine. As long as I haven't travelled 8,340 miles for nothing.
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