One thing Susato had learned over the years was that tragedy never gave you a warning. There was no feeling in your body or mind or heart. No sense of wrongness. No sudden waking in the night, breathless, heart clenching, wave crushing you. Nothing felt different, nothing felt wrong.
That morning, Susato woke feeling the same way she had every morning since they had begun their journey. Two weeks had passed, and her thoughts had been frantic and turbulent, alternating between joy and fretful imaginings. Her room was loud and she struggled to read, to keep herself occupied. All she could do was think about their arrival.
That morning, like every morning, Susato was looking forward to knocking on Kazuma's door and being greeted by his smile. They would spend the morning walking about the ship and exercising. She was looking forward to it even more than usual that morning. Her head was pounding and she hoped the movement and fresh air would ease the throbbing pain.
And she had knocked on his door. Expected him to call out. To open it. To smile at her as he always did. Good morning, Judicial Assistant Mikotoba! Let's go!
She had to admit, it was strange hearing him speak to her in a formal way, but it made her smile when he called her that. Made her feel capable and professional, like she was truly important to his life and his planned path. She eagerly waited for the door to open, for him to call her that.
That morning, there was no response.
No voice. No movement. No door opening. No Kazuma.
Susato knew something was wrong. Not because she had sensed anything, but because she had stumbled into wrongness too many times. Because she knew Kazuma too well. Because everything was always so routine. Because he would never fail to respond unless something was wrong.
Susato reached for the door. It would not open. No matter how she pulled at the handle or how loudly she called for Kazuma. It would not open.
Frantic, Susato rushed away, shouting for the crew and for the Inspector Hosonaga, who had disguised himself as one of their number in order to watch over Kazuma. Soon, Susato had gathered up some of the burly Russian crewmen, and stood back as they beat down the door.
"Quite curious, this racket."
Susato tensed. She knew that voice. She turned, body slow and hollow with consternation. "Mr. Sholmes?"
There he was, standing behind her, a smile on his lips like usual. But her surprise was short lived, the recognition barely having a chance to settle into her bones. For the next thing she knew, the door was bashed open. Susato swivelled towards the threshold and took a step inside.
Ice clenched her body. Paralysed her very breath.
Kazuma. He was prone on the ground, unmoving, unbreathing.
And grief swallowed her.
***
Why was Ryunosuke Naruhodo here? Why was he in the wardrobe? Why had Kazuma kept the fact he had smuggled him on board secret from her? Why had Ryunosuke killed Kazuma? The list of Susato's pains seemed to grow longer as the minutes passed. She stared at the makeshift outline where Kazuma's body had been, and her heart curled in a sharp, squeezing beat.
It was too much. It was all too much.
Genshin-sama. Mrs. Asogi. Now Kazuma. The whole family was gone.
Fury and sorrow ached inside her. She stared at Ryunosuke's face, her rage mounting. But his confusion, his shock, his grieved stare, his desperate pleas wore away at her, sent her emotions spiraling. What do I believe? What is the truth?
Well, she would find out. She wasn't sure she believed Ryunosuke, but together they would discover what had really happened.
And then Sholmes was there, spouting theories, acting like he did not know her.
"Mr. Sholmes. It's me. I used to...I lived with you for a while," she said.
"Huh?! You lived in Britain, Miss Susato?" Ryunosuke said.
Susato glanced at him quickly then away again.
"I assure you, dear madam, I have no idea to what you are referring! I am most positive I would remember if a Russian was under my roof," Sholmes said.
"Japanese," Ryunosuke groaned, slumping.
"And where is Iris, Mr. Sholmes?" Susato said.
"Now, now, Miss Mikotoba. I know how dearly you wished to steal my darling child, but you will not provoke me to a slip of the tongue quite so easily," Sholmes said and continued his exploration of the room, picking up Kazuma's journal.
Susato sighed. "I think I just did, Mr. Sholmes."
But really...where was Iris? Was she still with Sholmes? And if so, where had he left her? For she clearly had not travelled with him.
These brief musings fell aside as they set to inspecting Kazuma's journal and delved into investigating his tragic death.
And soon, they discovered the truth was so much worse than Susato had expected.
***
A moment of panic from a Russian girl on the run. When everyone should have been asleep—drugged with pills in the chicken—Kazuma alone had been awake to discover Nikolina's secret entrance onto the boat, due to his distaste for the food. And she had pushed him in a fit of panic. A push. A stupid fall. That was what had killed him. That's what had killed Kazuma.
Susato stared into Nikolina's devastated face and felt an icy rage seal over the jagged wounds of her heart. Susato turned away from her numbly and returned to Kazuma's room.
Holding Karuma in her hands, Susato pressed her forehead to the sheath and wept. This was all too much. Genshin had perished due to an illness. Mrs. Asogi had died from grief and stress. And Kazuma had been killed by a mistake, an ill-timed shove onto a bedpost while the boat shifted and a cat darted and a girl gave in to her fears. It was so awful, so wretched, so wrong. The Asogis had all been so strong, so vibrant, so full of charisma and dreams and passion. And now they were all gone. Just like that.
How could he have died so easily? Genshin. Kazuma. How had they both been cut down so swiftly, so suddenly, in such a pathetic manner?
"...Susato-san?"
The voice startled her, ripped her from her tearful reverie. Susato turned. Ryunosuke Naruhodo was there. His wide and bright eyes, his emotionally open face, his clear concern. It was hard to imagine she had ever really thought he could have killed Kazuma. In fact, she felt a deep pang of guilt rush through her at the very idea.
How monstrous to even think something like that. To think someone could kill their best friend.
"I...I didn't know you had returned," she mumbled.
"Oh, erm, well...I haven't been back long. Inspector Hosonaga just told me I should pack. You know...ready to leave the ship tomorrow, and all that," Ryunosuke said.
Susato looked away, her guilt and sadness growing heavier. Her hands tightened reflexively around Karuma. "I still...can't believe this happened. I can't believe someone's life can be over just like that."
"Susato-san."
Ryunosuke's tone was kind, and that only made her feel worse.
"He had such grand ideas for this visit to Great Britain. So many dreams. And now they've been cruelly taken away...just as he has," Susato said. "I thought I could never forgive the person responsible. But now...now we know the truth. That it was just an accident. Just a silly series of mishaps. It's too much, Naruhodo-san. It's just too much."
"...Yes, I know."
A tear rolled off her chin. Splashed against Karuma.
And then Inspector Hosonaga was there, offering his condolences, his guilt, his feelings of failure. And the weight grew heavier.
"Huh?"
Susato looked up, hearing Ryunosuke's exclamation, and blinked in surprise. His shackles had returned. And then Sholmes' laugh peeled through the room, enigmatic and ill-timed as always, it seemed.
"Surprised, Mr. Naruhodo?" Sholmes said, his voice strangely bright considering the circumstances gripping the Burya.
"What...is the meaning of this!?" Ryunosuke demanded.
"Oh, a trifling matter. Simply that, in my head, I think I shall always picture you wearing those shackles. Without them, the balance seems all wrong. It's...distracting. So I decided to restore them. For old time's sake, shall we say? You are a stowaway after all," Sholmes said and laughed yet again.
Susato watched the exchange, feeling oddly grateful towards the man. "Mr. Sholmes," she said. "We do appreciate all your assistance. I'd like to thank you...from the bottom of my heart."
"Not at all, not at all. And though it's a little late, may I offer my sincere condolences? The loss of your companion is truly heartrending. I hope that you will be able to fulfill some of his aspirations in his honour," Sholmes said.
"I'm afraid that won't be possible," Hosonaga cut in. "We shall be disembarking at the next port. In Hong Kong. We have to return to Japan and make a full report about everything that's happened."
"What? Wait a minute! It's just me that has to go back, isn't it? I mean, I was the stowaway!" Ryunosuke said, voice inching up with desperation.
"The terms of this study tour were negotiated by the Department of Justice in both Great Britain and Japan. It was to be one lawyer and one assistant. In the light of Mr. Asogi's unfortunate death...I'm afraid the study tour can no longer go ahead," Hosonaga said.
Susato could not bear this. Losing Kazuma. And losing him in such a nonsensical way. And now she would lose her chance to return to Britain. Her heart simply could not handle any further pain. She stared down at Karuma, at the hachimaki she had wound so carefully around the hilt, and felt that wave surge up from the past. It crushed her eyes, pushed down her throat, choked her.
"My dear fellows, the majority of problems have an extremely simple solution, you know! All you require is one lawyer, and the study tour can continue, surely?" Sholmes said. "The voyage to London still promises a good month of time. Ample opportunity, I would say, to find yourselves another student lawyer."
"Yes..." Susato mumbled. She wasn't sure what Sholmes was trying to suggest, but there was little point in this line of speculation. It was utterly hopeless. She would have to return home, rendering the words from her last letter nothing but lies. She would have to tell her father Kazuma was gone. She would have to visit the Asogi graves and apologise fiercely for being unable to do anything for anyone in the family, for being unable to protect Kazuma's dreams.
"Um...Miss Susato?" Ryunosuke said. "Do you think, perhaps...I might be able to do it?"
Shock jolted through Susato. Ryunosuke had defended himself in court before. Perhaps, just maybe...
"But you're not a lawyer, Mr. Naruhodo. Oh, unless...are you studying law?" Hosonaga said.
Ryunosuke tensed. "No, I'm not, but—"
"I'm sorry. In that case, I don't think there's even a chance it could work," Hosonaga said.
"But as I said, there is still more than a month before we reach England's shores. Isn't that right, Mr. Naruhodo?" Sholmes said.
"Yes, I have a month in which to study! To learn what I must to become a lawyer in Great Britain," Ryunosuke said, determination strengthening his voice.
"That's ridiculous! Are you seriously suggesting anybody could learn all of that in just forty days?" Hosonaga said, voicing exactly what Susato was thinking.
"There's only one way to find out! I would work my fingers to the bone, Inspector. Every single day...Will you let me try?" Ryunosuke pleaded. "And if, by the time we reach Great Britain, I haven't learnt enough to be recognized as a lawyer...I'll take whatever punishment is deemed appropriate."
"But...why put yourself in such a difficult position?" Hosonaga said.
"For Kazuma. He said that there was something he had to do in Great Britain. And that he would sacrifice anything to make it happen," Ryunosuke said, face and cadence radiating resolve and care.
Susato stared at him, an impossible hope starting to flutter in her chest.
"He was passionate about it. I can't let all that passion come to nothing. And, anyway, it's for my own benefit, too. I will become a lawyer. I have to." Ryunosuke turned towards Susato suddenly. "What do you say, Miss Susato?"
And she found herself smiling. A sincere smile, despite her grief. "I think it's a wonderful idea."
As Sholmes and Hosonaga debated the veracity of Ryunosuke's plan, Susato gazed at Karuma. She had been so foolish. To ever believe Ryunosuke Naruhodo could have killed Kazuma, to forfeit all hope of setting foot in London again without first exploring every avenue. Kazuma had been right about Ryunosuke. He was a good person, full of a determination and courage that reminded her a bit of Genshin. Perhaps...If Ryunosuke Naruhodo truly intended to fulfill Kazuma's aspirations, to carry his hopes and intentions on his back, then he needed to carry Karuma at his side.
Once Hosonaga dismissed himself, promising to take care of writing to the Department of Justice, Susato turned towards Ryunosuke.
"Are you really prepared to attempt this, Mr. Naruhodo?"
"Yes, I'm going to try. I wonder...would you consider teaching me what I need to know? Everything about being a lawyer?" Ryunosuke said.
Susato considered him for a moment, studying his features, his posture. Despite the loss he had just suffered, there was a bright light dwelling in his eyes. And the sight of it strengthened her. "I would be delighted to help you. I am a judicial assistant, after all!"
"Thank you!" he said.
"And...Mr. Naruhodo...I'd like you to take charge of this," Susato said, and held Karuma towards him, cradled reverently along both of her palms.
"What? Me!?...Are you sure?"
"I'm sure it's what Kazuma-sama would have wanted. It's name is Karuma. It's a great sword that's been in the Asogi clan for generations."
"...Very well, I accept. I'll treasure it always."
As Ryunosuke carefully took Karuma from her hands, Susato felt a terrible pang. Like a warm wind, Genshin's calm smile filled her mind. Kazuma's laugh. Mrs. Asogi's gentle koto playing. They twisted through her, a breeze whirling petals.
And then her hands were cold, freed of the soul of the Asogi clan. She stared at Karuma as Ruynosuke fastened it to his hip. She had made the right choice, she knew, but it hurt so acutely that they were all gone.
We must carry on for them, she thought to herself, and said a silent prayer.
***
Focusing on teaching Ryunosuke about the law consumed Susato's every waking moment on board the Burya, and she was endlessly grateful for that. It gave her little time to think about the loss filling her like shards of glass.
I should be sitting beside Kazuma-sama right now. Again and again, she pushed away the thought, until it collapsed beneath Ryunosuke's questions and the need to explain various passages to him, or else to find the right book to add depth to what was merely brushed upon in another.
Susato prised open the Commentaries, and felt her heart flutter. She smiled wistfully at the volumes as Ryunosuke studied them.
"Someone very important gave these to me long ago," she murmured, more to herself than to him.
"Really? Someone was able to give you these British books in Japan? Oh! Through the university, perhaps?" Ryunosuke said.
"Oh, no. They were given to me when I first arrived in Britain. Ten years ago..."
"Oh, that's right! You mentioned before that you...lived...with...Mr. Sholmes?" Ryunosuke said slowly, a faint grimace on his face.
"Yes, that's right. Although, he wasn't exactly at home much," Susato said. "And it was only for a brief time. At the start...and again, before I left. I lived with a very kind family most of my stay."
"Oh! So you know a lot of people in Britain then, Miss Susato?"
"I did know quite a few people, yes..." She grew quiet for a moment, then forced her thoughts away from those she had lost. "I wonder if Lord Penhale has been able to eat another pineapple," she said, smiling to herself sadly.
"Pineapple?" Ryunosuke echoed. "Some...unusual kind of apple?"
"Not at all. It's a status symbol, Mr. Naruhodo!"
"An apple is a symbol?"
Susato laughed, then sighed as she allowed her gaze to rest on the books. "I really hope he has been doing well, despite all that happened..."
"The pineapple man gave you these?" Ryunosuke said.
"Oh, no. Not him. He was just someone I met at a banquet. And again at a ball," Susato said. "The man who gave me these books...well, he is someone very special to me. He was just finishing his legal studies when I met him, actually."
"Oh! Is he a defense attorney too?" Ryunosuke said.
Susato shook her head, still smiling faintly at the memory of that strange and fateful day. "He's a prosecutor! I'm sure we will encounter him once we arrive."
"A prosecutor? Haaah...I wonder what he's like in the courtroom?" Ryunosuke said.
"...I have no idea, actually. But I am sure he is quite dedicated and meticulous," Susato said.
"Uh...that sounds intimidating."
"He's not! He's very warm and kind. And he's passionate about justice," Susato said. "He could be rather shy at times, but we loved to laugh together..."
"You sure sound excited to see him, Miss Susato. No doubt he's excited to see you too! It'll be nice to have a friend to help us out, won't it?" Ryunosuke said.
Susato's face fell. She gazed down morosely at the Commentaries.
"...Have you not heard from your friend, Miss Susato?"
"...No. Not for ten years."
"Oh...um, did something happen?"
"...Yes," Susato said and wilted. "Well, anyway...we need to continue with your studies. Let's go over these fundamentals again."
"These are just fundamentals!?" Ryunosuke said, eyes widening, a sheen of sweat on his brow.
Susato smiled.
***
One night, as Susato was returning to her cabin, she chanced upon Sholmes in the narrow hallway.
"Ah, finally finished with your frantic studying for the day, dear madam?" he said, pipe resting against his lips.
"I am. And you are awake at all hours as ever, I see, Mr. Sholmes," Susato said, smiling tiredly.
"My magnificent ability to resist the allure of sleep served me well raising a child," Sholmes said and returned her smile.
"And...how is she? Is she still in your care?"
"Indeed, she is, and always shall remain as such," Sholmes said.
"Yes. That is...That's good to hear. Mr. Sholmes, I am certain you have made for a wonderful father."
"The role of mother has not yet been cast, Miss Susato, if you still wish to don this pivotal disguise," Sholmes said.
Susato gave him a sharp look. "My answer is the same as it was ten years ago, Mr. Sholmes."
"So, yes, then?" Sholmes said and burst out laughing.
Susato's sharp expression sank beneath a small laugh of her own. There was something refreshing about his demeanour these days. Perhaps it was just the brightness she needed to help hold the shadows at bay, but Susato did think there was something different about Herlock Sholmes. He seemed softer somehow, a touch kinder—ill-timed, enigmatic laughter aside.
"May I ask you something, Mr. Sholmes?"
"You may, dear madam."
"Iris...still does not know about her true parentage?"
"No. And that is the way it must stay. Some mysteries are better left entirely in the dark, do you not agree?"
"A little surprising coming from the world-famous detective, Herlock Sholmes," Susato said, frowning. "I have been reading all of your stories with great interest. And I noticed..."
"That a certain aristocrat has never made an appearance?"
Susato nodded.
"I fear the former prosecutor has not played a role in my mesmerising life story, nor has he met my biographer," Sholmes said.
"Former?" Susato gasped.
"Quite so, my dear madam! The object of your affection has been living in seclusion for some five years now," Sholmes said.
"He...he quit being a prosecutor!? Why? Did he...Did he settle down with a family, perhaps?" Susato said tentatively.
"I fear that is entirely unlikely. It is quite possible his particular circumstances are something a shade darker. Far too dismal for discussion so late in the night, I would wager," Sholmes said.
"But...why? Why would he ever give that up? He was so determined to follow in Lord Klint van Zieks' footsteps!"
"Ah, a name I have not heard for some years. And I do think many would prefer to keep it that way," Sholmes said.
Confusion and concern danced through Susato in equal measure. She touched her fingers to her cheek, tried to figure out if there was anything that could possibly prompt Barok to stray from the path he had always been so passionate about. But there was no explanation that made any sense.
"Mr. Sholmes, has something happened to him? Something you do not wish to tell me?" Susato said. But when she looked up, Sholmes had already wandered away.
Mind burdened with fretful thoughts, Susato returned to her cramped cabin and lay down on the bed, swarmed by the incredibly loud noises of the engine. For a moment, she felt the phantom touch of memory—her father sitting with her as she mourned Genshin, Karuma gripped tightly in her hands.
Susato clutched her pillow and tried to shut out everything that was so loud inside of her. She focused instead on the ceaseless chugging of the engine.
***
"Look, Miss Susato! There! That's it, isn't it?" Ryunosuke said.
They were standing on the deck, looking towards the horizon as the boat pushed forwards, cutting through thick mist.
Susato lifted her hand to shield her eyes from the pale but very bright sunlight that glared through the clouds. She could just faintly make out the shapes of things through the fog. A finger of dark green, the slumbering mass of other ships.
"Yes! Mr. Naruhodo! At last, we're almost there!" Susato said.
"Do you think I'm ready Miss Susato?" Ryunosuke said, turning to her with an expression she imagined mirrored her own—that mix of fear and eager anticipation she was so familiar with by now.
"I'll be right at your side, Mr. Naruhodo, assisting you with every challenge that comes our way!" Susato said.
Seeing her determination, Ryunosuke broke out smiling. "You have done so much to help me already, Miss Susato. That's why I know...that we can do this!"
"Yes!"
"And you can see your old friends again. You must be so thrilled!"
Susato closed her eyes for a moment. Breathed deeply. Felt the salt-crisped air float into her lungs, and did her best to centre herself. "I will see them. Yes! I won't let anything stand in the way of that!"
They smiled at each other as the boat broke through the mist and the harbour bloomed into view.
After a decade of solemn yearning, Susato was finally back in Great Britain.