By:
first impression:
The beginning started strong and it was interesting on the get go.
pacing:
You do cliffhangers really well. I like your idea of ending the first chapter with "We found another [dead] body."
Other lines to use could be:
"A body was found in [location]"
Because assuming it's a investigation office or something like that, they have a way to mention things like finding dead bodies.
these are simply suggestions.
But other than that you wrote each chapter's ending really well, it makes the reader go straight to the next one in curiosity.
characters:
Avoid info-dumping about the characters as you did in the first chap. I think specifying that Ethan was a doctor was enough introduction for him for the first chapter. You can expand his backstory in further chapters to make him seem more real.
The paragraph about Ethan and what seems like a biography was pretty much telling and not showing.
Since he's a silent type, have him respond with short answers or not speak at all in certain circumstances in further character interaction.
It mentions that he's rich, show him buying expensive stuff with no problem without having to write down "He bought stuff cuz he's rich." when it could be, "He bought [expensive brand] and held out the black card" or something along those lines.
Jason and Ethan as a duo is really interesting and I like their interactions and the ones with Ruth as well.
Although, I wish you go more on what Jason is like as a person, like his quirks and his flaws. Perhaps he's messy or the opposite and is a clean freak. Or maybe he can be over-energetic due to often intake of caffeine and energy drinks, etc. etc.
Other than that, you're characters are well-written.
plot:
I think it's great, I get a Sherlock Holmes vibe with the way the chapters are constructed and also the profession of the main characters.
I like the way you paced the story to keep the mystery and the reader guessing along with the characters in the story. Which is usually what mystery/thriller readers are searching for in this genre.
So You've absolutely nailed it and I think the plot is interesting and while reading I kept reading till chap 6, I didn't even realize!
descriptions:
There was a part in the first chapter that I thought could use some suggestions. It was already good, but I was able to spark some ideas on describing Vincent getting stabbed.
I think you're writing in a limited 3rd pov, where it's narrated in third pov but only the main character's thoughts. Assuming that it is, the narration could also include the things Vincent experiences.
The silver blade impaled his arm and his screams followed after. He felt the shivering cold warmed by his own blood as he began to shake, afraid what's to come next. He needed more time to breath but his captor wasn't willing to give any.
He felt the cold blade strike his other arm, this time Vincent could only choke as he tried to yell and breath at the same time.
Then his captor stabbed him again. He wasn't sure where anymore. He had no time to react, to process, that all he could do was scream.
Once again, these are simply suggestions. Take it however you like.
The part where Ethan walked over to the corpse, I'm not sure if he just has a strong stomach but anyone who saw that crime scene would definitely fill sick.
So in the first part perhaps go:
He drew near the corpse, where detectives and police men gathered, and took a peak.
It was a nauseating sight.
As a doctor, he has seen many things but this, this was on a different level.
It didn't even look like a corpse, more so a half-eaten animal. [Proceed to describe it]
How could anyone be so cruel?
As you can see I didn't change much but simply rearranged it to kind of display a thought process going on as he looked at it.
dialogue:
There were dialogues that came off wrong or I could see what you were trying to write down but the line just didn't go that way.
There were also few grammatical errors but all of them are understandable errors and is not that bad.
The dialogue really gave the characters more life to them which is the purpose of dialogue so kudos to you! I think you also got the dialogue down to a tea and created a flow than doesn't end with an awkward pause unless intended.
Is it compelling?
Absolutely! I think even non-mystery/thriller readers can enjoy this book. It's really fun to guess who could it be, and searching for clues.
I'd say if a reader is wishing to start reading mystery/thriller, this book would be a good start. It's simpler than other books but still has this mystery vibe to it and the secretive tone in the story so readers can get a gist of what mystery is like.
overall experience as a reader:
I enjoyed reading it as you can see in this review and have nothing else to say really. I hope this review didn't come off as rude and was helpful in some way. Have a good day/night, farewell!