Behind Closed Doors

By beynikaoutsold

101K 5.9K 6.8K

Beyoncé has the biggest crush on Onika Maraj, the "it" girl. Girls were supposedly jealous of her and guys at... More

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Special I
Special II

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By beynikaoutsold

Beyonces Pov

We were back at school and I was worried the kiss was going to cause Onika to over think to the point where she ignores me but—no.

She still sits next to me infact I think we're closer. And she still lets me hold her hand. I really want her to be my girlfriend but I don't want to put any pressure on her.

I decided I was going to back off for a week but knowing her she was going to think I was avoiding her and get into her own head. I decided to just play the friend card for a whole 2 almost 3 weeks and now I'm kind of sick of it.

We haven't kissed since Halloween night, and every-time she talks now my eyes are directed to her lips and I feel like a perv.

"Wait let me get this straight." Robyn saids plopping on my bed. "You—you actually grew the balls to confess?" I rolled my eyes. She sure did have a way with words.

"Yes I did—"I was cut off.

"Then why are you here—in your room—talking to your little sister and bestfriend about her in your superman pajamas—" Solange rants and Robyn cuts her off.

"Which are quite funny looking If I may add." Robyn steps in and Solo continues

"And y'all aren't smacking coochies?" Solange asked sitting next to Robyn with the same expression on her face.

I swear, she's a mini version of Robyn.

"No we aren't! We haven't really talked about it since—she still lets me hold her hand and we've been normal but—"

"Y'all hold hands?  Like regularly? What did I miss?" Robyn asked getting up in surprise.

"Well yeah and in the closet at the haunted house that's where the kiss—"

"Y'all was slapping tongues while I was being chased by ghost face?!" Robyn asked sitting up fully. Solange cut in.

"Nah nah we ain't gonna focus on that right now—what we gonna focus on is the fact that you actually confessed and she ain't your girl? Your invisible balls are shriving up as we speak." Solange stated.

"Solo cup has a point." My dad said peeking in and I shut my door because I refuse to have him get on my ass for this too.

"Shut your trifling asses for five seconds and let me explain! I don't want her to feel pressured. Just because we like each other doesn't mean she's comfortable with dating me and then there's a whole 'nother barrier with me being out and her—well not." I stated in frustration.

I sat in the middle of them with my head in my hands.

"You think I don't want her to be my girlfriend? That's what I've wanted since day 1." I groaned in frustration and I heard their sympathetic sighs.

"Beyoncé let me give you some hardcore advice—

"If you say niggas ain't shit I'm going to slap you because technically even though her and I are both black Im always referred to as the nigga in question." I gritted out looking at Robyn.

"No no—I'm saying is that you have to take risks. Make it clear—you want to date her. I know you stuttering in that closet—which is ironic ass hell by the way—probably went over her head." She said and that did make sense.

"So what do I do?" I asked and I watched them share a look.

"Man up dumbass." Solange said bluntly.

"Man up? Ya know what—I have no balls! I cant do that! I know you say I dress like a nigga but ain't no balls in these draws!"

"You have no balls because you can't man up."

"Don't they sell plastic ones on porn sights?" Robyn asked my literal 14 year old sister. I was tired of them.

"Y'all are no help." I groaned falling onto my bed.

I went to school the next day and as usual her and I ate lunch together and talked in every class. Being around her was like a breath of fresh air—well scented air—imagine bath and body works as a person and that's what she smelled like.

At the end of the day—well my day. Being a senior and realizing that I really don't have to do anything after I'm done getting my gym credit and I stay on top of my core classes—I can leave early.

I was walking out and I heard that familiar voice. "Hey! Bey!" I turned around and saw Onika.

She looked around and pulled me out the building and whispered. "Did—did you know someone TP Kenzies house? She said it happens a few weeks ago and had to pay someone to get down all the toilet paper."

"Uh really? Wow that's crazy." I said and I didn't know if I should tell her that I literally did that.

"Don't you have cheerleading practice?" I was asking because she's been healthier lately—like genuinely. She actually eats at lunch and I haven't seen her throw up any of her food.

"It's canceled today. I'm all yours!" She said with a smile and I knew she meant for today but—her saying she's all mine really made me happy.

"Do you want to hang out with our friends—or me alone?" I asked gettibg closer to her and she looked up at me. She was really cute when she was shy.

"You—I love them but—I really like being with you." She said quietly and I knew what she meant. "Stop overthinking it because I know that's what you're doing. Let's have a chill day okay? Name a place you've never been."

"Alaska." She stated.

"Okay—maybe that was too broad. How about this—Oh I have an idea! Meet me at my house around 3 or 4 and I'll have a surprise for you. Dress like you're going to a sleepover." I stated smiling.

I was going to need to stop at the store but it'll be worth it. Plus it'll calm her nerves.

"Oh and Name nerdy things you like." And she puffed out her cheeks. "Oh cmon we both know they're nerdy—doesn't make them any less good but still kinda nerdy."

"Well I like harry potter, I played pokémon for like all of middle school-weird phase. I like marvel and DC superhero's—my dad was the one who really raised me so he showed me all his nerdy stuff. Along with 80s shows he thought were peak comedy." She explained and I nodded listening.

"I don't know if this counts as nerdy but I love movies that are bad—they're funny to laugh at. I've also grown to love those 80s shows." She  said.

"Thank you for this valuable information—you will not be disappointed." I said with a thumbs up and she looked a little suspicious.

"What?" I asked.

"Whatever plan you're coming up with—dont bake by yourself  I don't want your house being set on fire." She gave me a cheeky smile before slipping her hand out of mine and starting to walk to her car.

"Oh cmon! I'm not that bad at cooking my family over exaggerates!"I yelled watching her go. "Sure you aren't!" She yelled back and I leaned on my own car and sighed.

I got in my car and drove myself to the store. I brought fairy lights and abunch of really soft pillows. I stared at this pudgy pikachu plushie wondering if she'd want this—I got it anyways.

I brought abunch of snacks and decided to get abunch of dvd movies with tacky names because I knew they were going to be bad to some degree.

I stopped and got cookie and crème ice cream—I remember a little while ago she said she liked it.

I hummed casually walking through the aisles—now I know why my mom always takes forever when she shops everything here is so interesting when  it's 50 percent off.

"Brittany?" I heard a close voice say and I was met with the bitch ass nigga who can't get pussy for shit.

"Meek?" I asked just staring at him until I realized what he had said.

"It's Beyoncé." I stated gripping my cart a little more. He was pissing me off and all he said was my name—no not even my name.

"Huh, right." He looked me up and down and I tried my best not to get an attitude.

"Nickis really leaving me for this?" I gripped my cart. I didn't want to be disrespectful—

"What?" I asked in surprise.

"Nicki has been dodging me since homecoming and I'm finding out it's literally for some dyke. " I wasn't even focused on the dyke part this wouldn't be the first time I was called that.

"How? How do you know?"

"Oh well Kenzie told me and my friends earlier today. " I froze.

Kenzie told them about Onika liking girls?

Kenzie outed Onika.

Shit.

Shit shit shit. I was praying this wouldn't ruin her progress—our progress—she's come so far and this is not what I needed or what she needed.

"Listen I'd love to sit here  and listen to you complain about how you get no bitches and kick you and your balls or something but I have way more important places to be." I sped past him times the self check out line and i've never picked up items so fast before.

I was holding my phone with one hand and seeing that it was indeed almost 2pm—how long did I spend in there?

I sped home and I tried picking up all my bags in one trip and I was able to open the door like this. I didn't know if she found out about them finding out or what but I was gonna make this a great night for even if this didn't go as planned.

I quickly un bagged everything and set up everything I had to make a few adjustments which led me to having to harass Robyn's dad.

After I was done bothering him —I knew Solange was at a sleepover so I wouldn't have to deal with her—Mom is working overtime.

I got up on a chair and tried hanging the fairy lights—trying my absolute best not to break my own ass.

I took a quick shower and I stared at myself in the mirror. I got my best graphic Tee shirt and cleanest pair of sweatpants."You're the man Yonce!"

"What happened to not having balls?" I heard the deep voice of my farther say and I jumped back.
Damn I forgot this nigga existed.

"Why is everyone always in my business?!" I asked slightly annoyed and he snickered.

"Chill—also I saw that cookie dough—don't set the house on fire while I'm out—love you!" He said before I heard him run down the stairs.

I followed after rolling my eyes—I'm not that much of a fire hazard.

"Beyoncé your little date is here." He whispered but not really whispered because he still somehow managed to be loud as he snuck passed her.

She smiled looking up at me—no evidence of tears—maybe she didn't know that Kenzie outed her?

"Oh my god you can't be serious." I said looking at her. She had on some pikachu onsie and I tried my absolute hardest not to laugh.

I failed.

"Oh! Oh my god this is adorable!" I said holding ny stomach and I felt her slap my arm. She handed me some bag and I looked down at it.

"I got you one too." She stated and I looked at her before staring at the bag. "You—"

"Wear it! Please?" She asked and I knew she was probably gonna make fun of me for it when I did put it on but what do I look like refusing this?

I took the bag, "Stay here—like right here in this doorway or you'll ruin the surprise." I said and she nodded continuing to stand. I ran upstairs and I looked at the onsie.

"Oh she got jokes huh.." I said staring down at the giraffe onsie she got me.

I put it on never the less and I walked down stairs and I saw her face light up. "Beyoncé the giraffe!"

"I hate you and love you at the same time but I hate you a little more right now." I stated and she shrugged still smiling. Her dimples popping out.

"You said dress like I'm going to a sleepover—is Solo here? I got her one too. It's a grizzly bear." She explained and I shook my head though I'm sure Solange would put it on without hesitation.

"No shes at an actual sleepover—but I'm here! And I want you to close your eyes and take my hand." I commanded and she quirked an eyebrow.

"Fine I will but this better not be attempted murder or something." She mumbled before taking my hand and I smiled leading her to my living room.

"Open your eyes—Tada!" I announced and I watched her expression of suspicion turn into one of surprise.

"I turned my living room into a little movie theater. When you said harry potter I thought of fairy lights and I brought some sheets to make a tent like thing for us to sit in. When that didn't work I got an actual tent from Robyn's dad and the sheets and pillows are cushions." I explained and I watched her smile at my display.

"Beyoncé this is so cute—Oh my gosh you brought early 2000s comedy movies and romance movies?" She turned to me with a hopeful smile and I nodded.

"I knew they were going to be absolutely terrible especially because they were from the clarence section." I explained and that's what she full on hugged me.

I laughed when one of her pikachu ears hit the side of my face.

"This is so sweet! I love you!" She hugged me tighter and I swear my heart skipped a beat.

Okay calm down Yonce—she probably meant that in a friendship forever kinda way.

"Yeah I love you too." I said softly. "Oh we're gonna have so much fun!" She said excitedly. "I also brought cookie dough so we can make cookies—i figured it's good if you're here for that." I said and she giggled.

"What? So you don't burn your neighborhood down?" I think Solange was getting to her.

"Haha so funny." I said sarcastically and she let me go the kitchen taking my hand. Remember how I said my tail would wag if I had one? Well this onesie does and it's definitely wagging.

. . . . . . . . . . . .

I watched her flatten the cookie doe and then look elsewhere in my kitchen. "What are you looking for?" I asked and she turned to me.

"I want to get some crushed oreos and put them on cookies my aunt and my dad used to do this all the time for when it was my birthday." She explained and I nodded.

I opened the pantry which had said oreos and she put abunch in a bag and started crushing them.

"Your Aunt—what's she like?" I asked. She smiled as she kept crushing the oreos. She's never mentioned her aunt till now.

"The bossiest and high maintenance woman I've ever known." She said laughing shaking her head. She started sprinkling the crushed oreos over the dough.

"Really?" I asked. She said this but she was smiling. "Yup, one time as punishment she made me rearrange all of her shoes in alphabetical order of brand." She explained and I just stared in amazement.

"She doesn't sound like—uh—" I didn't want to offend her but she shook her head. "She's high maintenance but she's funny. Along with my grandma. They're both pretty funny—like mother like daughter I guess." She mumbled and put the cookies in the oven.

She peeked at me. "In case you're wondering—dads side of the family." She explained and I nodded slightly relieved.

She laughed a little sitting down. "I didn't get to see my Aunt a lot—haven't seen her in atleast 3 years actually. She's a business woman like my dad is a business man and neither have ever heard of a "break" a day in their lives." She explained taking a bite out of an actual oreo and I did too.

"Do you miss her?" I asked and she nodded. "Yeah—I haven't spoken to her in awhile. I should call her. She doesn't have any kids and I know my dad talks to her regularly. She just never takes breaks." She complained.

"Kinda like your dad?" I asked and she peered up at me before giving me a soft smile.

"Yeah. Im happy he's back but—I feel like it took me almost killing my self to get him back here. Still love him and I always will though." She shook her head and sat up.

"That's depressing—tell me a funny story from your childhood go!" She asked and I smiled thinking of a few.

"Wait stop thinking-I wanna hear the story on how you almost set your grandmas chicken on fire." And I groaned.

"Seriously? Cmon it wasn't even that interesting." I tried saying but she still looked determined to know.

"I was 11! And I had a lighter like those long ones for grills? I didnt know how it worked and my grandma had a farm. She didn't have normal crap to play with so I played with it where the chickens were and almost set her favorite chicken on fire." I explained.

"You were bored so you played with a lighter? Maybe you are a hoodlum." She joked and I shook my head.

"I'm not! I swear! It was only one time—maybe once or twice." I said and she looked at me with a duh face.

"Okay I lost count at 6." I admited and we laughed together trying not to choke on our Oreos.

It was comfortable silence and I smiled looking at her. "Hey so—I wanted to tell you something and it's kind of my own little surprise." She looked a little nervous and I kept listening.

"I came out to my dad." She said I sat up immediately. "You—" She cut me off.

"He was totally cool with it! I was so worried but I should've known from a dude who watched golden girls religiously wouldn't care." She said.

"Oh my god! So how'd it go? Like details. My coming out story included Robyn saying we should sail away to a lesbain colony and then my parents already knowing when I said I was gay." She snickered at my little summary.

"I came out to him by telling him I liked a girl and he basically casually ate his cake while talking about how much he loved your sneaker game." She explained and I kept watching her.

I'm not sure if she realizes she just told me that she told her dad that she—liked me. And to me it sounded like it was his approval.

Just killed two birds with one stone.

"Why would he randomly say he likes my sneakers?" I asked with a grin I knew the answer and she froze and looked at me.

"Well—i—shit I'm not good at secrets." She said and I smiled and shook my head. She bit her lip and looked at me nervously.

"I like you too. You know that." I said softly and I reached for her hand. We laced our fingers together like usual.

"It was just—I scared it was a impulse thing. I was also scared about my dad. And about just being a lesbian in general." She said I watched her.

"Lesbian? Twins!" I said trying to make her smile and she laughed as she held my hand a little tighter.

We stared into each other's eyes and she adjusted herself so she could lean over and then-

Beep Beep beep

She jumped back and our fingers unlaced and I watched her fall off the stool. "Nika! You good?" I asked and all I saw was her laughing. "Yeah—totally didn't break my ass cheeks." She said.

"I guess the cookies are done." She said still sitting on the floor and she looked good even with oreo crumbs on her face.

We took the cookies out and popped some popcorn before putting the terrible movies in my DVD player.

We sat in the tent and laughed and joked it felt so nice—we were watching a genuine romance movie now that failed at being a good one.

"The guy is stupid! Just confess!" She explained and I agreed and then stayed quiet remembering my ass couldn't confess for months.

"Jeez these characters logic is so messed up." I said eating some of the popcorn. I watched her smile and giggle and I couldn't stop staring.

Her smile made me smile, and I love knowing I was the cause of it.

I wanted to kiss her again. So badly. I guess she felt my stare because she turned and quirked her eyebrow at me. "Hey—giraffe you okay?" She asked laughing a little bit at the nickname she gave me.

I shook my head and I turned to her lacing our fingers again.

"I uh—I like you. You know that now and—I know you like me too." I looked at her for confirmation and she nodded shyly.

"I uh—"

Man up

I'll man up even if I'm not even a man.

"I want you to be my girlfriend. I couldn't exactly say this while in a tight closet in a Haunted House but—I really want to make this work. It's your choice I don't want you to feel pressured." I took her hand, the one that wasn't laced with mine.

And I kissed the back of it.

"I really want to show you the world Onika. Even if it's just my little world of my crazy ass family and as equally as crazy ass friends-and date nights like this." I admitted looking up at her and she was staring at me.

Please say yes.

Please say yes.

Please say—

She unlaced her fingers with mine and instead put them on the side of my face and I kissed her before she could kiss me first again.

She crawled into my lap and straddled me as our kiss deepened. I placed my hands slightly nervously on her waist.

"Yes." I heard her whisper when her head settled on my shoulder.

I grinned letting out a breath of air.

"I was really hoping you'd say that." I whispered too. She pulled back but she was still on my lap and I was loving this position.

"I lied earlier." I frowned at that. "About what Nika?" She bit her lip looking down at me.

"Cheerleading practice wasn't canceled—I just wanted to hang out with you. I quit the team right after we talked." My eyes widened.

"You—really?" I was in full shock.

"I never really liked it—and Kenzie was the only reason I stayed on but—I don't care about her now. I've grown away from her and I found peace with your crazy ass family, your equally as crazy ass friends and well—you." She whispered the last part looking down at me.

"I don't want to ruin the mood but—Meek was talking about how she—"

"Told everyone I was gay? Yeah I know. You should've seen their faces when half of them didn't even care! They were really just mad I quit the team because now they don't have someone to throw in the air." She shrugged and I was so happy.

Because she looked so happy, she didn't care.

"I'm not—I'm not afraid of Kenzie anymore. I don't even associate myself with her." She admitted.

I leaned up and kissed her nose. "I'm so proud of you." I exhaled and she snuggled into my neck.

"It's really because of you I mean—you taught me self worth Beyonce I really let someone like Kenzie tell me what to do for years." She said and she sounded annoyed at herself.

"If it makes you feel better—I lied too." I said and she looked a little nervous. "A-About what?" She asked and I shook my head knowing she was probably overthinking again.

"Not about wanting to give you the world—i've been serious about that since day one. I'm talking about being surprised when I found out Kenzies house was TPd. My friends and I did it." I admitted and I watched her laugh and slap my arm.

"Seriously? Oh my god—you really are a hoodlum!" She said and I shook my head trying to defend my honor. "No No! I am not! I just did what had to be done. It beat wanting to beat her ass." I said and she settled down her laughter and smiled looking down at me.

My girlfriend—looking down at me.

"Thank you—you're like my own person deviant now." She said and my face was starting to hurt from smiling so much. I felt like the luckiest person in the world right now.

I leaned up and kissed her again and she let me. It was soft and her lips were so plush. We kept our foreheads together.

"I did it ya know—I gained your trust. Remember how you said I need to in the beginning? And now you're my girlfriend!" I was so proud of myself.

"Yeah you definitely did." She said softly.

"You know when you gave me your number—I did a happy dance and french and Mr. Carlino was looking at me like I was crazy." I said and she broke out into giggles.

"And Im the nerd? Yeah right." She scoffed and I gasped in fake hurt. "I'm a nerd for getting the girl of my dreams number?" I asked and she peeked down at me.

The fairy lights in the tent shined and I could see her big brown eyes staring at me in disbelief.

"I was the girl of your dreams?" She asked me.

She was my girlfriend now so I felt like I had the right to kiss her again. So I did. I kept her lips close when I pulled away.

"Are." I corrected. I put some hair behind her ear so I could get a even better view.

"You are the girl of my dreams."

And she will always be.

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