(Y/N)
Monday morning, and I woke up with a headache. When I turned around in bed Suna was no where to be found. I can't recall everything from last night, i was way too exhausted and fell asleep as soon as we got home.
But I'm pretty sure we fell asleep together in each others arms, I just wanted to be in his arms even though I was still confused about the whole situation.
It was good right? He didn't do anything wrong?
I slowly got up and my head pounded like I was just up all night crying my whole head out.
Before I even got the chance to get out of bed, Suna opened the door and entered the room, I'd lie if I say something didn't feel different.
We both just looked at each other whilst he walked up to me with tea and some pain killers in his hand.
"Thought you might need this." He handed me the cup and put the pills on his nightstand right next to his bed and sat down next to me.
On the way home last night or even in bed we didn't really talk about anything, wether it was about the situation or anything else.
I stared at the tea for god knows how long trying to get something out, but there were literally no thoughts in my head. It looked like I was searching for an answer in that damn cup.
I just wanted all of this to be over so we could finally move on together for good without anyone trying anything dumb. I couldn't even be mad at Suna, he just wanted the best for me.
Then why did I still feel sad?
I let out a sigh that felt like it has been built up for years in me and set the cup aside.
As soon as I lifted my head, wanting to look at Suna, I found him already staring at me with a sincere look he doesn't really wear that often.
Still, there was nothing I could say and apparently he didn't either. I just gave him a sad smile and was surprised when he brought up his hand to my cheek to brush away a tear I didn't even notice.
I blinked a few times and took a deep breath.
This is what I wanted. Just the two of us.
"I love you, Rin." I said and it almost sounded like a cry for help. It was the only thing that was on my mind. I do, I really do love him. And I don't know If I could ever stop. How can loving a person hurt so much?
"You still do?" He was genuinely concerned. Of course I still did, how couldn't I and why would he think something like that?
I looked at him in confusion, "of course I do," now I brought my hand up to his cheek, caressing his cheek because I know he loves that, especially when his mood is down. "My anger at our situation doesn't erase my love for you. I don't think anything ever could."
I'm glad he believed me, at least I think he does because he smiled and pulled me into a hug. I know his trust in others is as bad as mine is, but I know that I can always trust him, I want to believe that.
We basically sat there for a moment with my legs over his and my head on his shoulder.
"Desiree won't bug us anymore, babe." He quietly said but I recognised some relief in his voice.
I didn't have the power to have a full on conversation. "How?" I almost whispered.
"Let's just say I know some things about her family that could destroy their reputation if the info went public." He said, and I don't know if I only imagined it but if felt like he had to hold back his laughter a bit.
Honestly it was no surprise that her family was fucked up or did some fucked up shit. Well my 'family' if you can even call it that, isn't really any different, but at least im not pulling any bullshit on other people for my own entertainment.
If she wasn't such an ass I may have felt a little bad for her, but it's Desiree we're talking about so she can burn in hell for what I know.
"Rin?" I asked, burying my head deeper in his chest while he started rubbing my back.
"Hm?"
"I'm so tired." I said without any strength. And it was the truth, I was so tired of not catching a break from any bullshit happening. I just want to live in peace with him. After all, why us? Did I do something horribly wrong in a past life? It's almost hilarious, everything happens against our favor and wants to break us apart. How funny.
"I know baby, but it's over now." He pressed his cheek against my head and held me tighter.
"We do everything together, remember? If we laugh together it's only fair that we can also cry together, right?" He let out a small laugh which made me smile like an idiot, I just nodded.
I really do love this boy.
But there was still one point that wasn't really over yet and we never really talked about it, which I am glad about and I didn't even want to think about it if I'm being honest. But as if he was reading my mind he also mentioned that.
"We got through this and we'll also find a solution for your situation at home, I'll take care of that if I have to. Everything will be okay."
And the strange thing is, I believed him.
"Okay." I brought my head up to his and kissed him. We kissed each other slowly, both obviously exhausted and still tired so we didn't rush anything.
It was just us both at that moment nothing or no one else.
As far as I'm concerned it could stay like that for a while, I wouldn't mind.
———
The both of us decided it would be better if we skipped school for the day since he didn't have practise anyway and we were both exhausted so we slept through most the day until his mum came in and woke us up.
Strangely she didn't see any problem with us skipping the day as long as it wasn't something we took advantage of and we both promised her we wouldn't. We both just really needed a day off and I think she saw that.
I still needed some things at home and also wanted to see my mum again, even though we weren't always on good terms, I still worried for her and I haven't really talked to her either.
So Suna and I decided we would check up on her, get my things and leave.
The only problem would be that her boyfriend was most likely there since he always goes there at the beginning of the week for whatever reason.
But when Suna and I arrived at my house, his car wasn't there, it was still a possibility that he was there but it wouldn't make any sense. Also my mothers car was still in the parking spot, which was strange because by know she should be at work.
I got out my keys and opened the door, immediately spotting my mum sitting at out dining table.
"Hey mum" I slowly approached her while Suna followed closely behind me, we both still didn't know if my mum was alone here.
She looked up at me and smiled, I think we were both happy seeing each other again.
I didn't see anyone in the room, "are you alone?"
She obviously knew what that meant and waved her hand at me as if it was nothing.
"Don't worry he's not here, he left a few minutes ago, he's at work now." She said and I let out a relieved sigh.
"And I'm also not going to ask why the both of you aren't at school." She looked between Suna and me, she still didn't know I slept at his house or that we were even together, but according to her look she probably put 2 and 2 together.
"But I'm guessing you slept at his place." Mum looked over to Suna once again and he looked at me with raised eyebrows.
"I'm.. sorry. This is Suna" I put my arm around his and pulled him a bit forward so he'd stand next to me now.
I also wanted to add and he's my boyfriend but first, my mum never knew about my private life and surely wasn't starting now and second, she probably already found out herself.
"Hey, it's nice to finally meet you" he said in the nicest way possible and it was kind of hilarious, he hated small talk and being all formal and shit. I guess at that point it was really kind of awkward but we both had to go through it.
"I figured," she started, while Suna and I both were confused. "Last night Michi called me and asked if you got home safely, and since you never came home and apparently left your phone at hers, she called me afterwards to tell me that you're okay now and are staying with a friend." she finished her sentence as she looked over to Suna and emphasised the word friend.
At least she thinks I only spent last night with him, that could've gone worse, since I officially still 'stay at Michi's house'.
Suna and I literally said nothing, I think we both just wanted to get out again as soon as possible, I just didn't want to be in the presence of my mum anymore, I miss her when she's not here but as soon as I'm reminded again what it's like to be with her in one room, I want to leave.
It's always like an uneasy feeling, even when she's not in a bad mood.
"Don't you want to sit down? I wanted to talk to you about something." And moved the chair next to her back a bit so I'd sit down.
Honestly that scared me a bit, now she wants to talk? Only took you a few years mum, I'm not really in the mood anymore to be honest.
I looked over to Suna and he raised his eyebrows a bit and gave me a look that said 'I don't think we have another chance'.
So we both sat down and I expected the worst.
"It's something kinda.. serious." My mum said as she looked over to Suna as in she wanted him to leave. But he knew way more than she thinks, he obviously knew more about me than she already does, but I couldn't be alone right now and I wanted him here.
But he probably got the hint and started getting up but I pulled him down again, "It's okay." He sat back down and looked at me and I looked at him for a moment.
I looked back at my mum, "Anything you're telling me, you can say in front of him." I said and Suna intervened his hand with mine which made me instantly relax a bit.
My mum looked at me with an almost sad but disappointed look, at first I thought it was because I wouldn't let Suna leave, but I know that look.
That look means bad news.
"(Y/N)."
Please don't tell me where I think this is going
"We're moving."
No. This can't be it. Maybe I heard her wrong?
Suna's hand tightened around mine and I looked at him, he looked nervous and swallowed.
I let out a nervous laugh, "excuse me I think I misheard you, what?"
"Next month, we're moving, again."
Yea no this isn't happening, this is not real.
...
Please not again, I beg you.
"Why?" Is the only thing I let out, not even being able to cry, I don't think I have already processed this.
I had to leave everything behind,
a-fucking-gain.
"I don't want to put you into danger anymore, I can't get rid of him, I am so sorry (Y/N)." She tried holding my other hand but I quickly pulled away, I didn't even look at her.
And after this whole time, Suna decided to speak up, "There must be another way, he belongs behind bars, It's not fair that you have to leave and he gets to keep pulling his bullshit."
I didn't see her reaction but I knew she was shocked that Suna knew about what happened, I didn't really care right now.
I got up and went into my room and locked the door. I didn't even give Suna a chance to follow me, normally he could always comfort me, but right now I needed to be alone.
We're going to move.
Again.
Next month.
I have one month left with him.
One month.