Sang
My ears ring with the gun shot as I stay still on the floor, staring at where my father lays clutching his thigh while groaning and gritting his teeth in pain.
“Holy shit, you shot him.” Gabriel says to the woman, his mouth hanging open.
The women lowers the gun and looks to Melody, not replying to Gabriel. “Are you okay baby girl?”
Melody nods her head and goes over to the woman. They both wrap their arms around each other in a hug. “I’m fine Aunt Hayley. What are you doing here? I told you not to come.”
Hayley. Hayley. Hayley. The name rings in my ears. This is my mother’s sister. My Aunt. She looks over at me. “I had to see for myself. I think I’ve waited long enough to see her again.” Melody follows her line of sight and smiles at me before releasing her Aunt. Hayley slowly comes over in my direction.
Silas beats her over and helps me to my feet and I lean my body into his, needing some support. “I’ve got you Aggele.” He whispers in my ear which I nod to.
“You're just as beautiful as your sister.” Hayley says, stopping in front of me. “Both of you are just as beautiful as your mother.”
I have no idea what to say. Thank you would probably be a good start but I don’t even know what my mother looks like. I’m gathering a lot like me, Melody and Hayley, but it just doesn’t seem real enough at the moment. I simply stare at Hayley, lost for words.
“You shot him.” Marie says. “Wow.”
“He deserved it.” Hayley says, looking at Marie. She smiles at her. “You must Michelle’s daughter. Michelle used to be a close friend of mine until she got sucked in by your father.”
“Huh.” Marie shrugs. “Never knew my Mom would be one to have a man control her.”
“Neither did I until she fell in love with that dirt bag.” Hayley shakes her head, looking down at Phillip Sorenson. “You have ruined one too many lives, Phil.”
“Shut up Hayley. Your voice was annoying twenty six years ago, it’s annoying now.” My father spits. He pushes himself up and onto his feet. He walks out the room and for a moment, we just stare at where he left thinking that he left the house however, a few moments later he returns with a small stack of papers. He sits down on the sofa, removing a pen from the jacket of his black suit. He starts scribbling stuff across them. We simply watch. When he’s done, he looks up and meets my eyes. “I don’t want any more shit. I just signed the house over to you.”
My mouth drops open. “Just like that?” I ask.
“It was supposed to go to Marie but I know Michelle won’t let her have it so it’s yours. I want nothing more to do with you.”
Mr. Blackbourne approaches him and takes the papers. After standing there for a moment, looking through them, his grey eyes meet mine. “It’s yours.” He turns his eyes to my father. “You're forgetting something very important though Mr. Sorenson.”
“And what would that be?”
“Sang technically does not exist. You send off these papers, you're going straight in jail, where I think you should be. Sang doesn’t have a birth certificate. She is a kidnapped child. A neglected child also. She is nothing in this world.” My father’s face pales. “So if it is okay with Sang, I would like you to put my name into those boxes. The house will be hers though.”
“Why don’t we just get her registered?” Hayley asks, frowning.
“Because, I don’t want to be.” I chime in before anyone else, surprising myself. I meet the green eyes that belong to Hayley. “There’s a reason, a reason I can’t tell you yet and may never will but I need to continue not being known.”
“That doesn’t sound good at all.”
Uncle and Erica share a look with us and I know that they have a little bit of an idea of what I’m going on about. Erica looks to Hayley. “I assure you, it is nothing illegal she is getting involved in. If it was, my own son wouldn’t be involved.”
“And neither would my nephews.” Uncle adds.
Hayley wants to know what’s going on as do the others but I won’t discuss this with them. I don’t want to, not yet. I don’t trust them. “Okay.” Hayley nods her head. I can tell she’s hurt by me not opening up, it’s clear as day on her face.
Huffing, my father snatches the papers from Mr. Blackbourne and asks for his details. I turn to Silas. “I need to get out of here.” I whisper, needing out now. This is starting to get too much, way, way too much.
Silas speaks to North in Greek, which I obviously understand. North looks to me and comes over. “Wrap your arms around me Baby.” He continues speaking in Greek. I nod my head and wrap my arms around his neck. He hooks his arms around my neck and under my legs. Then I’m in the air. I look up and notice the boys making a barrier so it doesn’t look obvious that we are leaving.
When the fresh air outside hits my lungs, I gulp in as much air as I can, welcoming it as it feels like it’s the first time I have taken a breath in days.
North gets me to his Jeep. When he gets into the driver’s side, he looks over at me with a smile on his face. “How about the beach Baby?"
“I think it’s the best thing I have heard all day.” I tell him with a smile.
*
North
I drive us to the beach in complete silence. A few times I would hear Sang Baby slowly exhaling as if to stop her tears; the first time, I took her hand in mine just so she knew I was here, right beside her if she needed me. The whole drive their her fingers we’re laced with mine and they never let go even when I changed gears. I don’t think I even loosened my drip on her tiny hand either.
I park the car as close to the beach as I can. We both get out of the car and meet at the hood. Immediately our fingers lace back together and it’s in that moment I realized the loss I felt in those few seconds. Fuck, I’m becoming a pussy.
We walk down the path towards the beach and when we hit the sand, Sang kicks of her goes and bends down to pick them up. I kick of my boots and then pull of my socks, tucking them inside my boots before picking them up also.
I look over at Sang and a beautiful small smile graces her pink lips. I smile back at her, pulling her into me and wrapping my arm around her shoulders. This of course had to break the connection of our hands, however, her tiny hand on her other side quickly comes back up and links out fingers together after putting her shoes in the hand that was holding my hand before.
This feels so perfectly fucking right.
We start walking down the beach and I can’t help but notice how quiet it is. You would have thought with the summer holiday, parents would bring their kids here so they could play and run around in the sand and bathe in the water. Not a person is in sight.
I can’t lie though, I love how it feels right this moment.
*
Sang:
As the warm sand goes between my toes and my eyes scan the beach; across the beautiful blue water and the golden sand, I can’t help but feel that right in this moment it feels like just me and North walking on earth. On the drive over, I was determined to pick the weight up and of my shoulders so I can enjoy this time with North and that’s what I have done. I feel so light, weightless and free just walking along the beach beside North.
No words need to be said between us, we both know how right this moment feels.
I come to a stop and look up at North. “Want to sit down?”
He nods, looking down at me through those dark eyes of his. “Sure baby.” North sits down first, chucking his boots to the side. I chuck mine next to his before going to sit down beside him. However, North shaking his head has me pausing. He opens his legs. “Sit.” He points to the spot between his legs.
I give him a smile, stepping over his leg and sitting down between them. At first, I sit hunches forward a little but North’s arms come around me and he pulls me back into his chest, his arms tightening. North brings his face down to be beside mine, turning it in a little so his nose runs up my hairline near my temple. “Thank you for bringing me here North.”
“One day Baby, I’ll bring you here at night. Stars always look better at the beach, brighter.” I smile and watch the waves roll in and out, listening to the tiny splashes of water. North’s phone beeps in his pocket and he removes it before bringing it in front of us.
He opens up a text message. Luke: How’s Sang? Everything okay? Is she Okay? I won’t lie, I love how they care for me so much, wanting to make sure that I’m okay.
I take North’s phone from his hands and tap out a reply. North: I’m fine, everything is fine. Thank you for caring x x x
I press the button at the bottom of the iPhone to bring it back to the home screen. I spot the camera app and turn my face into North’s our breaths mingling. “Can I take a picture of us?”
A smile starts curving up at the corners. “Yeah Baby, you can.”
I eagerly press the camera app and keep the phone facing towards us so I can see us on the screen. I hold out and snap a picture of me and North smiling at the camera. I take another, but in this one North has turned his head and his is looking at me as I look at the camera. As I watch him through the screen, his eyes are on my face. I can also feel them.
Slowly, I turn my head so our breaths are mingling once again. I look up into his eyes. When I hear the sound on the phone, indicating I took a picture, I can’t find myself to care. I didn’t mean to do it. I just hope it looks as beautiful as it feels; which is overwhelming. My heart beats so hard in my chest and the sparks are flying, I can feel them. His eyes; they tell me so much; tell me what he feels for me.
I hope mine say the same; say the words I can’t find myself to say out loud so soon. Say the words that my heart feels. I fear it’s too soon, I know it’s too soon. Is it possible to fall in love with someone so quickly? Is it possible to fall in love with nine, handsome, charming guys so quickly? I don’t know, I really don’t but that’s what my heart screams at me.
I love you, I want to say; I love all of you; is what I want say also but my mouth doesn’t move. North rests his forehead against mine and once again the camera sounds once again. “I know baby.” North whispers. “Fuck, I know you do. Just know that I feel the same.” My heart swells. He knows what I’m thinking, he knows that I want to say the words. “When your completely fucking ready, you’ll tell me, tell us how you feel.”
I nod my head against his, keeping my eyes locked on those deep dark ones. I tilt my head to the side a little. That little gesture tells him what I want. His lips ever so slowly come down onto mine and I close my eyes. This time, it wasn’t an accident when my thumb touched the screen to take the photo. I wanted to take it cause this is the moment I realize that chances are always worth taking, no matter the outcome.
North’s hand comes up and cups the side of my face, his thumb slowly stroking my cheek bone just beneath my eye as our tongues mingle and slowly stroke against each other. Our noses touch and stroke together. It’s so beautiful; so beautiful I find myself pressing the button for the camera once more before dropping his phone and bringing my hand up to his face.
The hair on his cheek tickles the palm of my hand and I love the feel of it. I find myself loving the small growth of his stubble on his cheek even more. I pull back a little so our lips our barely touching. “Don’t ever let your facial hair grown beyond this point. I love it.”
The next thing I know is I’m on my back in the sand and North is above me, resting between my legs. I try not to think of how intimate this position is. I have never been one to really think of sex but in this moment, my mind is screaming sex. Love making.
North grins down at me. “I’ll do whatever you want baby.” I grin as his lips come back down onto mine, wrapping my arms around his neck and tangling my fingers into his hair. It’s not too long and not too short which I love also. This length hair is perfect on North, but Luke’s is perfect on him also. Just like Kota’s and the others.
My leg lifts up on its own and rests on North’s hip. His hand goes down and his hand wraps around my ankle, gently massaging it before slowly, ever so slowly starts sliding his hand up my leg, the tips of his fingers just grazing my skin. Knew emotions start stirring inside of me, emotions I have never experienced before.
I gasp when his other hand bring my leg up and rests it on his hip. North is positioned perfectly between my legs. I wrap my legs around him. North pushes the palms of both of his hands into the sand either side of my head and pushes his body up so it’s hovering over mine. I meet his eye briefly before slowly travelling down to his chest. I slowly slide my hands from around his neck, keeping the palms of my hands against him.
My hands come to his chest and a growl he releases vibrates through my palms. I want to look up at him but I know I’m blushing, I can feel the heat in my cheeks rising and getting hotter. I start trailing them lower and my palms go over each of his nipples which harden beneath my touch, another growl coming from low in his chest. “Baby.” He breaths.
I carry on going, feeling each dip and bump of his muscles beneath his t-shirt. When I reach the hem, I hesitate a moment. Can I actually do this? I just touched him over his t-shirt, can I really touch him beneath it? I inhale a deep breath and put my hands under his t-shirt and slowly press the palms over my hands onto his warm skin.
North’s face comes down to mine and he presses her forehead against my own. I look up and meet his eye. “I love your hands on me baby, I really do, you have no idea what’s going on through my head right now, but you’re not ready. Not for that anyway.” I hate how rejected I feel and I hate how North immediately sees it on my face. His hand cups his my cheek. “Don’t look like that. I’m not rejecting you, I’m simply saying just not yet.”
He’s right, I know he is. I’m not ready for anything like that. Besides, I haven’t even kissed all the boys yet. I can’t go there when I still need to experience more of the boys. I haven’t even made out properly yet, like I heard about in high school. “Your right. Okay.”
“I think we should head back.” He whispers. The tone of his voice tells me he doesn’t want to leave.
*
North:
As Sang and I walk hand in hand back to my jeep, I think of all the things possible to get rid of the hard muscle in my jeans. As soon as I get to Sang’s, I am going straight into her bathroom for a long ass cold shower.
I help Sang into the jeep and start walking around to the driver’s side. My phone rings and I answer Kota’s call. I tell him that we are heading back now and he tells me good, as we have a lot that needs to be discussed. Before slipping my phone in my pocket, I bring up my photos.
I don’t know if she meant to take it but the picture I bring up is when we are both looking into each other’s eyes, the love we feel shining brightly.
That picture is all the evidence I need. This beautiful fucking girl loves me, us. Her eyes tell the story in that photo. I set it as my home screen photo before getting in my car.
*
Sang
North parks his jeep on the driveway outside the house I have called home for the last two years. Really, this house isn’t my home. I’ve never had a home and that’s the honest truth. My whole life I have been moving around to different places. North gets out the jeep and comes around to my side and opens the door for me. He places his hands onto my hips, helping me down when really it wasn’t necessary.
As he places me down onto my feet my hands go onto his shoulders and my head tilts back, looking up into his deep dark eyes. He gives me a small smile as he looks down at me. “I’ve got you baby, let us take care of you.”
The thought of having North and the others taking care of me for the rest of my life makes my heart skip and beat and images flash through my head on what my life would be like having them in it. A small smile curls at my lips at the images flashing through my mind. It would most defiantly be a wonderful life.
North takes my hand and together we walk into the house. He closes the door behind us, signaling to everyone that we have arrived home. Soft but rushed footsteps get my attention and eight faces I have learned to love quickly come into my view. Several different expressions are on their faces;
curious and worried being the main ones.
I drop North’s hand and approach them, quickly getting enveloped in hug with Silas. My arms go around him and I press my face into his neck, inhaling his scent; the scent I love so much. “We’ve got you Aggele.” He whispers into my ear and the tears get set free.
I start sobbing into his neck, clinging to him like my life depends on it. He runs his hand through my hair soothingly, whispering words that only he and his brothers have ever said to me, words I’ll cherish until the day I die. I sob and sob as he clings onto me and I cling onto him. I feel extra hands touching me and trying to soothe me also but I can’t bring my body to move right now.
“Let it all out, Pookie.” And I do. Whatever has happened over my whole life, especially the last few days I let out. Tears leave my eyes like a waterfall and my body shakes and shudders with every sob, every breath. I needed this and I wipe my snotty nose once more on Silas’ t-shirt I pull back, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand.
A hand cups my cheek and I look into the warming kind eyes. “Feel better Aggele?” I nod, giving him a small smile.
“Let’s sit down and talk Sang.” Owen says, holding his hand out to me. Silas sets me down onto my feet and I reach for Owen’s hand, taking it straight into mine and linking out fingers together. I look down at the joined hands and smile when I see that they fit perfectly together, as if they we’re two pieces of a puzzle.
Owen leads me into the family room and I come to a stop when I spot my visitors sitting on the sofa in the house I have lived in for so long. Declan, Melody, Marie and Hayley sit on my sofa. Erica and Uncle lean against the wall. No sign of my father, thankfully.
Hayley is quickly on her feet and her eyes on mine. They fill with tears and I can see with her body language that she so desperately wants to come over to me and embrace me in a hug but I’m not ready for that yet, I’m not sure when I will ever be ready for that. “He’s gone Sang.” She says. “You’re free.”
The thought of being free does nothing. I’ve practically been free my whole life, able to do what I want as long as I wasn’t getting into trouble with authorities. I’m free from being neglected and that’s something I have wanted for so long because for as long as I can remember I have only ever wanted to be loved and now I’m having that chance. I laugh silently to myself shaking my head. Why do I have a feeling I’ll be taking another chance very soon?
I made the right decision in taking a chance with the boys, will I be taking this chance? I shake my head. That’s something I’ll need to sit down and think about when I’m ready but for now, I smile at Hayley. “I need time...time to get my head around all this.”
“I understand, I do.” I’m not sure if she’s trying to convince me or herself with those words.
“I also have a few things I need to take care of so if you wish, you can leave your number and I’ll contact you when I’m ready.”
Hayley smiles. “I’ll do that. Thank you Sang.”
I meet her eyes, giving her a tight lip smile. “Don’t thank me yet.” I turn to Nathan. “Can I go to your house please?”
He holds his hand out to me and I eagerly take it. “Let’s go, Peanut.”
Owen tells Nathan that they will all be at Nathan’s house shortly, once they have said goodbye to the guests in my house. Nathan holds my hand as he walks me to his and leads me to his room once we are inside. He hands me a pair of shorts with a tie and a baggy t-shirt and I go and change into them. Leaving the bathroom, I place my clothes on the dresser and then smile at Nathan before climbing into bed beside him. I don’t even think about my choice, the one I’m making in this moment by lying next to Nathan, I simply do.
I lay on my side and very soon I’m feeling arms coming over my hip followed by a hand resting on my stomach. Nathan’s chest presses to my back and
I sigh, closing my eyes. “Thank you, Nate.” I whisper.
“Anytime Peanut.” He whispers as I drift off to sleep.
*
I peel my eyes open and look around the dark room. Something woke me, but I’m not sure what it was. A few moments later I hear Silas’ booming laughter. I kick of the covers and sit up in bed, stretching before getting to my feet. Padding over to the bedroom door, I run my fingers through my hair, quickly tying and securing it with an elastic. I walk down the hall and linger by the door to the living room.
The TV is on and it looks like a comedy. All the guys are either smiling, chuckling or full out laughing while clutching their stomachs. Faces are red, eyes are watering and I simply love the sight before me. I look around at each of them, catching the grey steel eyes that belong to Owen. He opens his arms, patting his lap and I pad over to him, nestling myself into him, molding our bodies together. A hand comes down onto my thigh and his thumb starts stroking patterns on the material of the shorts. His other hand is at my neck, playing with the tiny loose hair at the nape of my neck.
“Thank you Sang, for taking this chance.”
I pull my head back and look up at him. Although his eyes look tired, he seems relax and I like that. “Thank you Owen, for being there, for being you, for everything.” He kisses my forehead before I rest my head back on his chest. For once, I see my future and it’s so happy and bright.