Y/n's POV:
We sit on the beach. We've been here for maybe an hour, just sitting. Not talking, not planning, not celebrating. Just sitting in silence. Until, finally, it's not silence.
"I can't." Dream suddenly breaks the stillness in the air. I look up at him, not uttering a single word in response. "I can't- I just... can't." He digs his nails into his scalp, gripping onto his long blonde locks of hair.
"I know." I whisper. Just two solemn words escaping my lips.
"Have you ever felt guilt, y/n? Guilt so strong it swallows you whole. Guilt so strong it's all you can think about? Guilt so strong that it's almost like a little voice in your head? Relentless. Pounding. Never ceasing." Dream looks at me, his face full of distress, placing his hands on his temples.
"I know, Dream." I repeat, just three solemn words.
Dream shakes his head, "no..." he breathes out. "You don't." He pauses. "And don't hit me with the 'this is what you wanted' shit."
"I wasn't going to, Dream, because I went through the same thing when you were first taken to prison. I thought locking you away was what I wanted. It's what I always wanted. Turns out it wasn't. It was what the people wanted. All this time we never had a thought of our own." My voice is low, but heartfelt.
"Then it's time I make a decision of my own." Dream stands up. I start to stand, but he places a firm hand on my shoulder. "Don't follow me, y/n." My brows furrow in confusion.
"What-" I start.
"I can't keep asking you to risk your life. I can't keep asking you to be with me. I tried in the beginning, I tired to make you stay away. In the end I gave up, my feelings got the best of me. I'm weak, y/n. I did exactly what I said I wouldn't do." Dream's voice holds a tone I've never heard him use. It's soft, it's raw. It's him.
"You're not asking me, Dream. This is my choice." I try to argue, but he shakes his head.
"I'm pathetic, y/n. I have to go. Far away where no one can find me. Not even you."
"Dream..." my voice breaks. "Dream, please." I know even if I plead he won't change his mind. Because this is him. This is Dream.
"I can't live with myself, y/n!" He yells, digging his nails so hard into his scalp that it draws blood.
"That what was all this for? Risking our lives for what?" I question, a sudden edge to my tone.
"I..." his voice fails him as he looks down. "I needed closure."
I scoff, "you are fucking pathetic, Dream. Go off and do whatever the hell you want to do. Go off and forget me which seems pretty damn easy for you."
"Do you think this is easy for me?" His voice rises, hundreds of emotions flickering in his green eyes.
"Then don't leave, Dream! Don't leave when I just got you back..." I trail off, sadness etched into my words like an old, heavy woven quilt.
"I'm doing this for you, y/n."
Quietness comes over us again, the faint blaring of the alarm far in the distance. It feels like years, when it's only been hours.
"I need to leave because it's true. I will only hurt you more and more because that's what I do, y/n. I've dragged you along this far, now I have to let you go." His voice sounds weary and tired, as if he's thought about what to say over and over in his head.
He leans in and presses his lip against mine, but this time I don't kiss back. He pulls away, guilt, fear, sadness, pain all visible on his face.
"I'm sorry," before I can even say another word he dashes into the forest leaving me numb, cold and alone.
One more time.
***
I'm sat there in the same spot who knows who long later. It could've been minutes, hours, days. The same cold feeling buried deep in my chest. He's gone. Again. He's here, but he's not. What was it that he said?
Guilt so strong that it's almost like a little voice in your head.
All the time.
Guilt for betraying people over and over.
Then I think about Dream's guilt. The guilt of murdering someone with your own hands. Watching their face contort in pain, beg for their lives, until finally, finally the last breath escapes their lips and they fall silent. The only thing left is the killer, with blood staining their hands. A constant reminder that they took a life. A life that wasn't theirs to take.
A scream suddenly brings me back to reality. My head instantly snaps in that direction and I stand up, with no hesitation I run into woods. My feet thud on the ground below me, the moon high in the sky.
I hear it again, a cry for help. I know it's only meant for me. It's him. It's Dream.
He needs help.
I stop, scanning my surroundings, trying to pinpoint where the sound is coming from. I hear it again, my name being called. I swivel around to the face the noise, running in that direction. Finally, I see them.
Dream's back is against a tree, Sam in-front of him, weapon drawn.
"I'm taking you back to prison, Dream." Sam warns, his tone hard. "Any chance you had of being free ends now. You've killed Quackity, so unless you revive him right now, you're going straight back to prison."
"I can't use the revive book," Dream responds through gritted teeth. His expression falters for a second, just a second, but enough for me to see something inexplainable. He's not lying.
"Then I'm taking you back to prison, Dream."
No. Please, no.
I didn't think it was going to come to this. My mind wanders back to that conversation many nights ago. I didn't think it would ever really happen...
Sam advances forward, reaching for Dream's wrists. Dream is weaponless, jaw clenched. He doesn't look scared, he's waiting.
I know what he's waiting for. He's waiting for me.
I quickly emerge from my hiding spot, Dream's eyes fill with relief. Sam curses under his breath.
"Y/n, please," his eyes have a pleading look to them. We both know what he's asking for. I hold the dagger in my shaking hands, my whole body trembling. Sam looks between us, managing to grab Dream's other wrist.
Dream and my eyes meet. And all at once I knew everything was forgiven. But I know I'll never forgive Dream for what he's about to make me do. And if I can not forgive him, then who will?
An unfamiliar sob of pain, violent and sudden escapes Dream's mouth. "Please, please, please..." his eyes dart to the dagger in my hands. I shake my head ever so slightly, I can't. "You promised!" He screams, his voice rising in desperation as he squirms in Sam's grasp.
I can only stare at him as tears stream down his face, I'm frozen in place. I grip the dagger tighter in my hand, unable to do anything.
I can't. I can't. I can't.
~flashback~
"Y/n?" He sits up from the obsidian ground, looking my way.
"Yeah?" I answer, idly looking up at him from my spot on the cool floor next to him.
"I need you to promise me something, okay?" My eyes narrow in confusion.
"What is it?" I ask in concern.
"If we make it out of here and they catch us... you have to promise-" his voice breaks. "You have to promise to kill me. Y/n, I rather be dead then have to be here in this hell-hole my whole life." My eyes widen at his request.
"Dream, you know I can't-" I start.
"Promise me," his hand finds mine as he holds it tight. "If the time comes I need you do that for me. Promise me, please..."
I had faltered. Hesitated. Until I saw his face, he meant it, he wanted it. So I agreed.
"I promise."
A/n: new chapter???🤭🤭 I'm sick so I decided to write 🥱 another chapter will be out soon🌝