SHAWN AXCEL'S POV
"Kaasar! Kaya ayokong mag-alaga ng babae, eh. They said that girls are getting wild when they're drunk."
Napamura ako nang makahawak ako 1ng bubog kaya dumugo ang kamay ko. This is freaking out and I'm going to get crazy with this. Why am I doing this anyway? Oh right. Because of this fucking like thingy.
Ayoko naman talagang makaramdam ng ganito eh kase alam ko kung anong magiging epekto nito sa'kin. But how could I stop it if it's my heart who keeps on liking her. At dahil dito, ako na ngayon ang naglilinis ng ginawa niyang kalat kagabi. And what's worse is...I don't even know how to clean for fucking sake.
Mahilig lang akong magkalat pero hindi naman talaga ako marunong maglinis. Si Katria lang.
"Hmm. Ayoko na sa inyo! Manloloko kayo!"
"Fuckig shit!" Napapikit akong maigi nang masalo ko siya at binalik sa kama niya.
Shete! Ilang beses na ba siya nahulog sa malaki niyang kama? Ah basta! She's even talking that she doesn't like those people around her because they we're all cheaters. Tapos kalaunan umiyak siya habang natutulog. I even panicked when I see tears flowing down to her cheeks while she's sleeping.
I don't know why I suddenly felt like I want to protect her from anyone that could harm her. But how could I? She doesn't want me on her side and keeps on pushing me whenever I want to. Pasalamat na lang siguro ako nang malasing siya kase kahit na hindi niya ako kinakausap, nakakasama ko pa rin siya. Pero nakakalungkot lang kase alam ko namang ipagtatabuyan niya ako paggising niya.
"Kailangan ko nang bilisan 'to, mag-aalasingko na." Mabilis kong pinulot ang mga gamit niyang hinagis niya kagabi.
I'm not used in arranging things because I don't even do it in my condo but still...I'll try. Pinagbasehan ko lang kung saan niya nilalagay ang iba niya pang mga gamit. Hindi ako sure pero okay na 'to kaysa naman iwan ko na lang na nagkalat sa sahig.
When I glanced at her in the bed, she's peacefully sleeping that's why I get the chance to clean her mess outside. Hindi ko nalinis 'to kagabi dahil sa pagiging wild niya kaya 'yan tuloy, ngayon ko pa lilinisin. I put the glass on the sink and those empty bottles of Vodka in the trash bin. Pinunasan ko na rin ang mesa at nilinis ang mga nagkalat na junk foods sa sahig.
Kahit hindi ako marunong magluto, tinuruan naman ako ni Katria na gumawa ng soup at magprito ng hotdog kaya 'yon na lang ang ginawa ko. She needs to eat this to gain more energy. Hindi ko nga mabilang kung ilang beses siyang sumuka at nasukahan niya pa ako kagabi kaya napilitan akong iwan siya saglit para magbihis.
Gusto kong sumigaw sa sakit dahil sa panibagong sugat na nasa kamay ko. If I'm going to count my wounds in my hands, maybe it's around five cuts already. Kasalanan ko ba kung hindi talaga ako maingat pagdating sa ganito. I stopped on cooking and turned off the stove when I suddenly heard a loud noise coming from her room.
Mukhang may nahulog...Shit! Nahulog?!
"Oh shit! Ang sakit!"
I saw her on the floor, feeling the pain on her back. Mahina akong napamura at agad siyang dinaluhan para buhatin pabalik sa kama niya. Good thing she's not that heavy that's why I can carry her anytime.
How could she gain weight if she's always in a diet? Plus, nage-exercise pa siya kaya ang ganda ng katawan niya.
"Ilang beses ka nang nahulog d'yan sa kama mo dahil sa likot mong matulog. Ngayon lang kita hindi nasalo dahil nagliligpit pa ako sa labas."
Her brows furrowed and tried to remember why I'm here."Y-You...stayed? Hindi ka talaga umalis? Didn't I told you to leave me alone?"
Eto na nga bang sinasabi ko eh. My instincts never failed to give me some hints.
"As if I listened to you. Kung umalis ba ako may mag-aalaga ba sa'yo?" I raised my eyebrow at her.
"Hindi ko kailangan ng mag-aalaga sa'kin. Wait...Who the fuck changed my clothes?!" Tiningnan niya ako ng sobrang sama pagkatapos niyang makita ang suot niyang jacket at saka pajama.
I immediately raised my both hands as if I'm surrendering."Not me. Pumasok ka sa CR pagkatapos mong malasing at paglabas mo nakabihis ka na. Just to let you remember, I didn't touch any part of your body. Maliban na lang kapag nahuhulog ka sa kama mo kase sinasalo ki---"
"S-Sinalo m-mo'ko? So you really touched my body, you bastard!" Pinaghahampas niya ako kaya ginamit kong pansalag ang mga kamay ko.
"Alangan naman hayaan kitang mahulog sa sahig, 'di ba? Hindi kaya ng konsensya ko na hayaan kang masaktan. Of course, I'm going to catch you." Hindi ko alam kung anong meaning ng sinabi ko basta bigla na lang siyang natigilan.
Pero sa kamalas-malasan, tinamaan niya ang mga sugat sa kamay ko kaya napadaing ako sa sakit. She stopped hitting me when she saw me groaning in pain. Anak ng---naman oh!
"Goddammit! Fuck---Ang hapdi!" Kinagat ko ang pang-ibabang labi ko nang makitang dumudugo ang mga sugat ko.
"Shit! What happened to your hands?! What did I do?" she asked, panicking.
"Ikaw kase eh! You hit me so hard and my cuts were still fresh. Hindi naman kase ako marunong maglinis ng bubog at hindi rin ako maingat kaya nagkasugat ako."
"You're really stupid, aren't you? Bakit mo naman naisipang maglinis kung hindi mo naman pala alam kung pa'no?! Nagbibigay ka talaga ng perwisyo sa'kin kahit kailan."
Her words hit me that I couldn't even talk. Naglakad siya papasok sa CR niya at hindi man lang ako tinapunan ng tingin kaya naisipan kong lumabas na lang. Tinapos ko ang nilinis ko kanina sa kusina at tinapon sa basurahan niya. I didn't say anything when she get out of her room while holding a first aid kit.
She's not going to put an alcohol to my wounds, right?
"Sit here. I'll treat your wounds. Baka ma-infected pa 'yan at ako na naman ang may kasalanan."
She's always so harsh on her words. Hindi niya ba alam na nasaktan din naman ako sa sinabi niya sa'kin kanina? O talagang wala siyang pakialam? Aish. She never did care for anyone's feelings in the first place.
At saka bakit nga ba ako nasaktan? Ganito ba talaga kapag may gusto ka sa isang tao tapos may sinabi siyang masakit sa'yo?
"N-No thanks. Kaya kong gamutin 'tong mag-isa sa condo ko. You should drink advil first before eating the food that I prepared for you in the kitchen. Handa na 'yon lahat, pumasok ka sa University kung kaya ng katawan mo." I gave her a small smile at walked towards the door.
"Hindi ka ba kakain? You prepared the food, right?"
Kapag inaya mo'ko, mabilis pa sa kidlat akong kakain katabi mo.
I turned around to face her but eventually shook my head."I prepared it for you that's why you should eat it by yourself. Oh pa'no? Alis na'ko. Kailangan ko pang maligo para pumasok."
Takte! Ayain mo na kase ako. Nagugutom na ako kanina pa. Bwisit!
"Fine, mukhang hindi ka naman mapilit eh. You can go now. Thanks by the way."
Bagsak ang balikat kong lumabas sa condo niya at binuksan ang condo ko. I get a first aid kit in the drawer and sat on the sofa. I couldn't fucking do this because I'm fucking afraid of alcohol and betadine. Bata pa lang ako takot na ako rito. That's why I'm taking care of myself as much as I can so that Mom won't apply me this. Iyakin kaya ako sa ganito!
"Shit! Shit! Hindi ko talaga kaya 'to! Ayoko na!" I closed my eyes and inhaled sharply.
Paano na 'to?! I can't go to the University in this state. Baka nga magkakatotoo ang sinabi ni Zeriel na ma-infected 'to pero hindi niya naman kasalanan. I'm the one who declined her offer to treat me but I also have my reason. Maliban sa takot ako sa mga ganito ay takot din akong baka masakit siya gumamot.
"Do you think that it will heal if you won't treat it? Kalalaki mong tao takot ka sa gamot."
Dahil sa gulat ay nabuhusan ko ng alcohol ang buong kamay ko."Fuck! Fucking holy shit! Damn! Ang hapdi nito, punyemas!"
"Bakit mukhang paiyak ka na?"
Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin kahit na namimilipit na ako sa sakit."Can you please knock on the door if you'll enter? Parang gusto mo akong matuluyan dahil lang sa panggugulat mo eh. Look what you've done? Ang hapdi na ng kamay ko, pa'no ko 'to igagalaw?"
"What?! Kasalanan ko ba kung nagmamatigas ka kanina. If I know, you're afraid of medicines. Simpleng alcohol nga lang paiyak ka na. Sound so gay, right?" she smirked, probably teasing me.
Hindi ko inalis ang sama ng tingin sa kanya dahil sa sinabi niya."If you're just here to tease me, the door is widely open for you. Kitang nasasaktan na 'yong tao nagawa mo pang asarin. So what if I'm afraid of alcohol? Hindi ko naman kasalanan 'yon."
Hindi siya nagsalita at may nilapag na plato sa harapan ko. My mouth is salivating when I saw the food in front of me. It's Hawaiian Locomoco. Sikat 'yan na pagkain kaya nagulat ako nang alam niya kung paano lutuin.
"You can't eat that if your wounds aren't healed. Umupo ka nga ng maayos at 'wag kang gumalaw. If you make any noise, I'll pinch your wounds." Tinabig niya ang pagkain sa pwesto niya at saktong hindi ko maabot.
Seriously? Why is she here and helping me? Hindi naman siya marunong tumulong lalo na sa lalaking kagaya ko. But whenever I think that she's treating my wounds even if I already told her that I can, still she insisted herself to treat me. Maybe it's the soft side of hers.
"Fuck! Ang sakit naman n'yan, Zeriel. Dahan-dahan nga lang kase," I hissed when she suddenly put the betadine together with the bandage and pressed it.
She didn't even glanced at me and just kept it in the kit right away."Alam mo minsan, kailangan mo ring harapin ang takot mo sa isang bagay para kapag nasanay ka na hindi ka na masasaktan pa. Sige na, kainin mo na 'yang niluto ko. Katria texted me that we're going to see each other at the cafe in the University. Ugh. Hindi ko alam kung ano na namang pakay niya sa'kin pero sana naman...hindi na siya magsasalita ng mga walang kwentang bagay."
Minsan talaga kakaiba siya. I don't understand her but seems like there's something on her chest that is hard to take away. I can feel it. Para bang may pinagdaanan siya siya sa lahat ng bagay kaya kung makapagsalita siya, ang lalim ng pinaghuhugutan niya.
"Thank you for this food, I really appreciate it. So, are you going to see her? Magkaibigan na ba kayo?" I tried to smile even if I'm getting suspicious in her words and actions.
"Yes. She won't stop bugging the hell out of me that's why I need to. Aalis na ako, bahala ka na d'yan."
"Thank you...again. Sana sa susunod, madalas na tayong mag-usap para naman mas makilala pa kita. And I hope that you won't push me away again," makahulugan kong sambit.
She was stiffened but didn't turned around to face me."It's sad to say that I don't want this to happen again. Ginawa ko lang 'to dahil ayokong magkaroon ng utang na loob sa iba, sa lahat, lalong lalo na sa'yo. So I'm just saying this once, I don't want to mingle with anyone especially to you. Masyado mo nang pinagpipilitan ang sarili mo sa'kin. And I don't like that."
And for the second time, I was left dumbfounded when she left me alone. My heart suddenly aches without even knowing why. Sa tuwing iniiwan niya ako na puno ng mga masasakit na salita, nangyayari 'to sa'kin.
I just fucking like her, right?! But why am I feeling like this as if she's so important that I always get hurt whenever she say those hurtful words to me?! Fuck it! Ilang beses na ba nangyari sa'kin 'to?
This won't happen to me if we never cross our paths.
I locked the door of my condo and went back inside. Gusto kong walang makaalam na nandito lang ako kase ayaw ko munang pumasok. No one will going to find me, anyway.
Niligpit ko na lang ang binigay niyang pagkain sa'kin at nilagay sa ref para hindi masayang. I'm not in the mood to eat and I suddenly felt tired. Ikaw ba naman ang hindi matulog ng buong magdamag, hindi ba puputi ang mata mo kakadilat. Nakatulog ako pagkatapos kong maligo pero mga tatlong oras lang din dahil nagising ako sa kakatunog ng phone ko. I was about to throw it away when I saw Kuya Daron's name on it that's why I immediately answered his call.
[Hey, dude. Where are you? Nilapitan ako ng mga kaibigan mo kanina, nagtatanong kung bakit hindi ka pumasok. Are you sick?]
"Not so, Kuya. Pagod lang siguro ako pero pakisabi na lang sa kanila na baka bukas na ako papasok. I want to be alone right now," I answered in a lower tone.
[Got a problem with her? She pushed you away...again. Am I right?]
"Yeah. But I don't want to talk about it right now. Gusto ko na munang magpahinga para kumalma ang isip ko. I was tired last night."
[We'll go to your condo after class. Ready the drinks because we'll going to accompany you later. Para ka kaseng broken hearted sa boses mo]
"Thank you sa pag-aalala, Kuya. But I'm not broken hearted. Maybe just a little disappointed but I'm okay."
Hindi na ako dinalaw ng antok pagkatapos no'n kaya bumangon na lang ako para kumain. It's already lunch time but I haven't eaten breakfast. Wala akong ibang makain kundi 'yong pagkain na binigay ni Zeriel. Labag man sa kalooban ko na kainin 'yon kase hindi pa rin ako makaget-over sa sinabi niya sa'kin kanina pero wala na akong iba pang pagpipilian. I need to eat this or I'll starve to death.
Pursigido na talaga akong matutong magluto para sa sarili ko. I'm always depending on buying cooked foods outside and if not, Kat will cook for me.
Naisipan kong lumabas para bumili ng mga ingredients sa malaking store hindi kalayuan mula dito. The store downstairs only sells important necessities and it's not complete. Kailangan ko pang mag-drive para makapunta sa store kung saan kumpleto ang mga paninda nila.
When I finally arrived at the store, I saw an old man who's talking to a guard in the store. Kumunot ang noo ko nang sinigawan ng guard ang matanda kaya hindi ako nagdalawang isip na lumapit sa kinaroroonan nila.
"What is the commotion all about? Bakit parang sinisigawan niyo ang matandang 'to?" I asked, raising my eyebrow.
Napayuko naman kaagad ang guard dahil mukhang nakilala niya na ako."I'm sorry, sir. Hindi po kase pwedeng papasukin ang mga matatanda dito sa loob. Sinusunod ko lang po ang patakaran, sir."
Nilingon ko naman ang kawawang matanda sa tabi ko."Lolo, ano pong gusto niyong bilhin. Ibibili ko na lang po kayo kase hindi talaga pwedeng pumasok kayo eh. Okay lang po ba?"
"Sige, hijo. Maraming salamat. Nawa'y pagpalain ka ng Diyos."
Wait...He looks so familiar. I think I've seen him somewhere.
ZEKIAH XYRIEL'S POV
"What do you want? Spill it."
It's lunch time when I agreed to see her. I can't ditch my morning subjects just to talk to her. She didn't even tell me what are we going to talk about. But I bet it's nonsense. Wala naman talaga siyang kwentang kausap eh.
"I just want to ask if you have problems. Need any advice from your friend?" Tinaas baba niya pa ang kilay niya na para bang ang cool niyang tingnan eh hindi naman.
I just rolled my eyes on her, looking irritated."If I have problems, I can handle it by myself. And I don't need any advice from you because---"
"You can find ways on your own. Gano'n ang sasabihin mo, 'di ba?" she cut off my words.
"Exactly. Alam mo naman pala eh. Then what's the point of this conversation, Katria? I have more important things to do. So, will you mind if I'll go?"
"Do you know that rejecting help from the others can't do any good just because you think all of it depends on your decision? And pretending that you can carry all of your problems is like committing suicide. Pain can kill you if you let it eat your heart, Zeriel. I know you're not heartless. You just became one."
Napatingin ako sa kanya habang binabasa ang reaksyon niya pero wala akong makita."How did you know? No one knows my story except for Alina because she's my only companion ever since everyone left me alone. It's not that easy to open up and trust someone again. Hindi 'yon gano'n kadali gaya nang sa tingin mo. Why? Hindi ba pwedeng nasanay lang ako na dinadala ang problema kong mag-isa at wala ni isang tumulong sa'kin kesyo pabigat lang daw ako. The pain and hatred in my heart will stay still and no one could rid it away from me."
"You can't live in a peaceful life if you won't let go of it. 'Wag kang magalit sa'kin dahil hindi ko naman sinasabing madali lang 'to sa'yo pero subukan mo. Wala namang masama at walang mawawala. At least you know on yourself that you tried, right? Nang sa gano'n wala kang pagsisihan sa huli."
"How could I? Sa tuwing nakikita ko ang mga taong kinamumuhian ako, nagpupuyos na ako sa galit na para bang gusto ko silang mabura sa mundo. I can't control my emotions knowing that they're the reasons why I became like this. Hindi na ako marunong magpatawad, ayokong makihalubilo sa iba na katulad mo dahil sa takot na gamitin niyo ako ulit, at higit sa lahat masyadong mahirap kunin ang tiwala ko dahil alam kong masasaktan lang din ako." I closed my fists above the table but I calmed down when she put her hands on top of mine.
"You can always lean on me, Zeriel. Anytime." She smiled sweetly as if I already accepted her as my friend.
Hindi nga ba? Am I ready to have friends again? Hindi na ba nila ako ta-traydurin kagaya ng nangyari sa'kin no'ng highschool? Is she for real or just another version of fake human species? B-But still...why am I feeling so comfortable with her. Na para bang mapagkakatiwalaan talaga siya.
"Zeriel! Zeriel! Hindi mo ba sinasagot ang mga tawag ni Tita Wyna?!"
Agad akong napatalikod at tumayo nang makita si Alina na humahangos."Why? Naka-power off ang phone ko at wala akong planong kausapin ni isa sa kanila. They're just going to explain why my useless father did that thing and it's kinda annoying. Hindi ba maliwanag sa kanila na ayaw ko na silang makausap at mas lalong ayoko silang makita."
Lumingon muna siya kay Katria na sumisimsim sa cappuccino niya bago nagsalita."It's not because of that, Zeriel. It's Scarlet. Naglaslas siya dahil daw ayaw niya nang maging pabigat sa inyo at ayaw niya raw na makitang nasasaktan ka dahil sa kanya. Even if she's just your half-sister, still you came from the same father. Alam mo namang wala na siyang ina hindi ba?"
Natigilan ako saglit sa sinabi niya. S-She did what?! I never did told her to commit suicide but she did it for me.
And what about her mother? A-Anong ibig sabihin niyang wala na siyang ina?
"S-She probably did that to seek everyone's attention. Doon naman siya magaling eh. And where's her mother by the way? She's responsible for it."
Alina looks so mad at me that she even grabbed my hand."Ano ba, Zeriel?! Wake up! Hindi ka naman talaga ganyan. You're not heartless instead you always care for anyone around you. Pwede bang kahit sa kapatid mo na lang, maawa ka? At saka paanong hindi mo alam na patay na ang mommy niya? Sheria died one year ago, according to your dad that's why they come back here."
I don't know what to say. Hindi ko rin alam kung anong dapat kong maramdaman. All I know is that my heart is tightened after she told me what happened to her.
"W-What? Samahan mo'ko. I won't take too long."
Nang lumingon ako kay Katria ay binigyan niya lang ako ng isang maliit na ngiti at saka tumango. I didn't waste a chance and immediately drove my car to the hospital that Alina told me. Nakaupo lang siya sa passenger seat habang ako ang nagmamaneho dahil naisipan niyang sumabay na lang sa'kin.
When we arrived at the said hospital, Alina and I get inside and she asked for my step-sister's room. Tiningnan niya muna kung wala ba si Dad at si Mom sa loob dahil ayoko muna silang harapin. I want to talk to Scarlet alone, just the two of us.
"Sabi ng nurse, nasa canteen daw silang dalawa sa cafeteria ng hospital. Kakalabas lang daw nila sa kwarto ni Scarlet. They might eating right now so you still got the chance to talk to her. Be sure to make it fast."
Tumango lang ako sa kanya."D'yan ka lang at magbantay ka sa elevator. Knock the door when they're near so that we can go before they could see me."
Umalis na siya kaya agad kong binuksan ang pinto para pumasok. I saw her reading a magazine with my face on the cover. Alam kong napansin niya na may pumasok pero hindi niya binaba ang magazine na binabasa niya dahil sa pag-aakalang ako ang parents niya o 'di kaya ang doktor.
"Why are you reading my magazine?" I asked to get her attention.
She accidentally let go of the magazine she's holding when she heard my voice. Nanlaki ang mata niya nang makitang nasa harapan niya ako. She was about to give the magazine on the floor when I get it first. Napansin ko nga rin ang dami ng sugat niya sa braso at namumula pa, mukhang galing lang sa pagdurugo.
"A-Ate...n-nandito ka. P-Pasensya na talaga kung pinilit ka nilang pumunta rito. Believe me or not...I tried to stop them from telling you. Ayoko kaseng magalit ka na naman dahil hindi mo naman talaga kasalanan." Yumuko siya para hindi ko makita ang mukha niya at palihim niyang tinakpan sa kumot ang mga braso niya.
I let out a sigh and sat on the chair beside her bed."Why do you want to kill yourself? What are you thinking, huh?"
"Ayaw mo sa'kin Ate, eh. Mabuti ka pa kase kahit na galit ka sa parents mo, mahal ka pa rin nila. May pinsan kang nakakasama mo palagi, si Ate Alina. You have a lot of fans, followers, and supporters. Maraming may gusto sa'yo at isa rin ako sa kanila. While me? I was hated by everyone for being an illegitimate daughter. So what's the sense of living if no one could accept me...even you that I considered as my real sister. Mom left me too, I have nothing now." She wiped her tears away, trying to be tough.
Maybe I was wrong when I called her a fake one. Tears can be fake but words and feelings cannot. At alam ko sa sarili kong may awa pa ako kahit na konti lang. Because I can feel the pain she's carrying. Seems like we were like tied in a knot and couldn't find a way to untie it. And that way is forgiveness.
Should I forgive her and give the chance she's waiting for?
"Mahirap din para sa'kin ang lahat, Scarlet. Forgiving someone is hard for me. Marami na kase akong pinagdaanan, eh. But who knows? Just my cousin, Alina. Kase siya lang naman ang nasa tabi ko sa lahat." I stared at her for a minute, reading her expressions.
Napayuko siya ulit nang magbadya na naman ang mga luha niya."Ako rin naman, Ate. Muntik na akong ma-rape no'ng third year highschool pa ako. That was my professor. Kung hin---"
"Your fucking what?!" nanggagalaiti kong tanong.
Humagulhol siya ng sobra at tinakpan ang mukha niya."A-Ate...tama ka nga. K-Kahiya-hiya lang ako. Pinagsamantalahan ako ng professor ko pero hindi natuloy dahil may kaklase akong pumasok sa office niya at nakita ang nangyari. He reported it to our principal that's why the professor got fired. Pero nang sumunod na mga araw, nakatanggap ako ng mga masasakit na salita na inakit ko raw 'yong prof at malandi raw ako. Everyone in our school dislikes me and so with my friends. Kahit sila hindi rin naniwala sa'kin. A-Ate...m-masakit ng sobra."
Nag-angat ako ng tingin para pigilan ang luha kong mahulog. As much as possible, I don't want to see her crying. B-Because seeing her in this situation makes my heart aches. Hindi man kami pareho ng pinagdaanan pero pareho ang sakit na aming naranasan.
"Stop crying. It already happened. Natanggal na naman siya sa trabaho niya at bagay lang 'yon sa kanya. You escaped from the place that makes you feel worthless. Mabuti na rin 'yon."
"There's no good thing in it, Ate. Wala rin 'yong pinagkaiba rito, eh. I always feel useless. Wala na akong nagawang tama at puro gulo lang ang dala ko kaya mas mabuting mawala na lang ako." Pinaghahampas niya ang sarili niya habang umiiyak.
I immediately grabbed her hands to stop her from hurting herself."It's enough. 'Wag mong pag-alalahin si Dad at Mom sa'yo. Do you think hurting yourself will make everything okay? Kapag nawala ka ba, may magbabago?"
"Oo, Ate. If there's no me, you can fix your broken family again. 'Di ba, sabi mo ako lang ang nagdadala ng peste sa buhay mo? That I'm the reason why you became like this. Kaya baka...b-baka kapag nawala ako hindi ka na magalit sa'kin. Baka mapatawad mo pa sila kapag narinig mo ang paliwanag nila. Baka mapatawad mo'ko kap---"
"I said enough! Bakit mo ba 'to ginagawa para lang sa'kin?! Para lang mapatawad kita?! Why do you want to hurt yourself just to let me happy. Why?!" I hissed, crying so hard.
Mas lalo siyang umiyak nang sigawan ko siya."B-Because...I love you, Ate. Ikaw lang ang nag-iisa kong kapatid kahit na sampid lang ang turing mo sa'kin. Masaya ako kapag kinukwento ka ni daddy sa'kin simula bata pa ako. Pero ayokong magalit ka kaya gusto kong makaisip ng paraan na mawala ako para hindi ka na masaktan nang dahil sa'kin. Ate, ikaw naman kase ang tunay na anak, eh. Kaya siguro okay lang kahit na mawala ako."
"Stop it, Scarlet! Do you think I will let that happen?! Sa tingin mo ba kaya ng konsensya kong hayaan ang sarili kong kapatid na mawala sa mundong 'to?" pagalit kong tanong sa kanya.
Masakit din pala na makita ang kapatid mong nahihirapan. It's not my plan to cry in front of her. Ni minsan, hindi ko inisip na sasabihin ko 'to sa kanya. She's just my half-sister...but I treated her as my real sister.
Nag-angat siya ng tingin sa'kin habang puno ng luha ang mukha niya."G-Galit ka sa'kin, 'di ba? A-Ate...ayaw mo sa'kin. Kaya bakit---"
I hugged her so tight and caressed her hair."I'm forgiving you, Scarlet. Hindi na ako galit sa'yo. P-Patawarin mo'ko."
"A-Ate! 'Wag ka nang umiyak. Y-You don't have to apologize, it's my fault anyway. M-Masaya ako na pinatawad mo ako kahit na...m-mahirap pa rin sa'yo." Niyakap niya ako pabalik at doon na umiyak.
"No, Alina is right. I should forgive you. Wala kang ginawang kasalanan at ngayon ko lang napagtanto na ayaw kitang mawala. Just stay here and heal yourself, we'll see each other again when you're okay." Kumawala ako sa pagkakayakap sa kanya at pinunasan ang mukha niya.
"Zeriel, they're in the elevator. Parating na sila. We need to go." Alina knocked the door outside to interfere.
"Ate, aalis ka na? H-Hindi mo ba sila kakausapin?"
Agad naman akong umiling."No, I don't want to. Ikaw lang ang sadya ko rito kaya ngayong maayos na, aalis na ako. Remember what I've told you."
"Yes, Ate. Thank you."
Nang makalabas ako ay naghihintay na si Alina sa'kin kaya nagmamadali kaming umalis. But unfortunately, we encountered them when we were about to exit that's why they stopped walking in shock. Agad ko naman silang nilagpasan at rinig ko ang yapak ng mga paa nila na nagmamadaling umalis. Maybe they were worried about Scarlet, thinking that I did something bad to her.
I can forgive my step-sister but not them. 'Yong napakalaki at napakalalim na sugat sa puso ko ay nandito pa rin pero naghilom na ng konti dahil sa pagpapatawad ko kay Scarlet. Siguro sa ngayon... hanggang do'n lang muna.
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