Lena Boggs
"For your sake, I hope you're joking." Addie gasps at her brother, throwing a piece of popcorn at him with a frown displayed on her face. Ayden catches the popcorn in his mouth before flashing his extremely annoyed sister a toothy smile making her scoff.
"Why on earth would I joke about that? I'm not joking Addie." Ayden says as he sits in between my legs on the floor of his massive living room, I sit on the couch and gently play with his hair while listening to the two siblings argue.
Addie leans forward with raised eyebrows, "Why would I joke about that," She mimics Ayden, crossing her eyes and doing a horrible impression of him before slamming her hand down onto the couch cushion. "Because Mom and Dad will actually murder you if you're being serious!" I giggle to myself as I shake my head at their banter.
I found myself at peace with my life for the first time since summer started. There has been no new drama between my Mom and Dad, granted I haven't seen or spoken to my Dad since I saw him at the hospital and when he comes back home to pick up more clothing, I lock myself in my room... Other than that, things are good. My Mom's still trying to move on, understandable considering she was married to him for fourteen years but overall, things were getting better.
JJ and I had reconciled our differences, slowly building our friendship back up to what it once was. Of course, neither of us have even mentioned the hooking up part of our friendship that had developed over the last year- But I think it was a mutual agreement that, that would stop now. It kind of sucks though, he was great in bed and I am kind of still in love with him.
"I just think college would be a huge waste of time and money." Ayden shrugs. "Are you really serious?" Addie gapes at her brother in disbelief and he smiles back at her, "As a heart attack." Ayden leans his head back so he can see my face. "What do you think, LeeLee?"
I glance over at Addie who's giving me a daring look and then look back down at Ayden. "I mean, I know I want to go... It's whether or not I can afford it that's the issue. You're lucky, you don't have to worry about that. I know so many people on The Cut who would have loved to go to college but didn't because they couldn't afford it," I tell him. "I think you're throwing away an amazing opportunity if you don't go, but either way it's your choice. Do what makes you happy because at the end of the day it's your opinion that matters, not mine."
There's a few seconds of silence before Addie throws a handful of popcorn at Ayden, making him yelp as one hits him in the eye. "That's the nice way of saying she agrees with me, jackass!" Addie snaps at him, sending me a wink that makes me smile.
"I'm done with this conversation, you guys are ganging up on me," Ayden fake pouts, sticking out his bottom lip as he pushes himself to his feet and turns to look at me. "You're supposed to take my side, LeeLee."
I giggle as he plops down beside me on the couch and pulls my legs over the top of his thighs. Leaning closer to him, I cup his cheeks and bring my lips to his for a second, and before pulling away, I gently slap my hand against his cheek. "Stop pouting, you big baby."
When I look back at Addie, she's pretending to gag and sticking a finger in her mouth.
Noticing that I've caught her in the act, she pulls her finger away from her mouth and gives me an innocent smile. She reminds me of JJ, in a sense. With her sarcastic comments and the way she acts, it was hard not to think of him when she is around but it made me like her all the more.
"As weird as this is going to sound, Lena," Addie blurts as she kicks her feet up onto the glass table that sat between the two couches, "I did some social media stalking last night and I have to say... Your Dad is a total DILF." My jaw drops as she says it nonchalantly.
"Addison!" Ayden snaps, "You're so gross. How do you even know what that means, dude?" I couldn't help but fall into a fit of laughter. I hadn't expected that at all, especially when we weren't even talking about anything like that.
Addie scoffs, shoving popcorn into her mouth. "I'm fourteen, not four." She said to him with a mouth full of food. "Only one more month until I'm fifteen, too!" She points out, before sticking her tongue out at Ayden.
Ayden's hands rub my legs gently, tickling my bare skin with the tips of his fingers in a soothing way. "Do you want to stay the night, Lena?" He asks me, I turn over and look at him. "Yeah, I'd like th-" Before I could finish my sentence, my phone began ringing from the back pocket of my jean shorts.
I blush as the song Baby by Justin Bieber begins playing throughout the room, Addie snorts as Ayden gives me an amused look. "Love the ringtone." He makes fun of me, watching me reach into my back pocket.
"Shut up. John B made that his ringtone on my phone." I snap back at him before pressing my phone up to my ear. "Hello?" I answer.
"Lena?" John B's voice sounded panicked and breathless, sparking my anxiety as I sat up straight and took my legs off of Ayden's so I could place my feet on the floor. "John B, what's wrong?"
"Lena, do you think you could get to my place as soon as possible?" I stand up, looking around for my backpack. "Of course I will, John B what's goin' on?"
There's a muffled noise in the background, and some music playing which causes John B to raise his voice into the phone. "There's something wrong with JJ, I need you to get here!"
Fear is all I felt, the sudden need to be where JJ was right at this moment was overpowering as I thought of the millions of things that could be wrong- That could have happened.
"I'm leaving Ayden's now, John B." I tell him before hanging up my phone and not wasting another second of my time. "I need to go. JJ-" I freeze as I look back at Ayden after mentioning JJ's name, the look on his face made me feel bad but it didn't matter right now... All that mattered was JJ. "JJ needs me, I'm sorry." I apologize as I rush to the front door.
Ayden follows me. "It's getting dark, Lena. Let me drive you, alright?" He offers, I was right about to refuse... But I knew that going with him meant I would get to JJ sooner. "I'd really appreciate it." I accept, Ayden grabs his keys off the key hook beside the door.
"Bye Addie, see you soon!" I call over my shoulder, not waiting for a response and walking out the door, practically running to Ayden's car. Ayden follows close behind me, unlocking his doors so we could climb in.
We drove away from his house without another word, the music silently playing from the radio as I stared out my window with my fingernails in between my teeth nervously biting down on them. I wish John B had told me what was wrong, maybe I would have felt more at ease instead of shaking with anxiety.
I was worried about JJ. I knew he could get himself into some stupid things, so the possibilities were limitless when it came to him.
It wasn't until we got to the bridge that Ayden finally said something to me. "Do you know what happened?" His voice is quiet, I could tell that he was sort of upset but was trying to understand.
I sigh, "No... John B just said I needed to get to his house as soon as possible. I'm just... Super worried."
When I glance over at Ayden again, there's a look of annoyance on his face that makes me frown. "What?" His eyes flicker towards me for a second and then look back at the road.
"It just seems convenient to me, that's all." My frown deepens at his words. "What's that supposed to mean?" I push wanting to know exactly what he meant by that.
"The second you guys work things out it seems like he drags you back into his mess, are you sure he actually needs you or is this another one of your friend's tricks?" I couldn't help the anger I felt towards him, judging JJ as if he knew him.
"You have no idea what JJ's life is like, alright? Don't make assumptions on your small knowledge of the life he has to live," I turn back to face the window. "You're forgetting you come from a completely different kind of lifestyle..." I mutter the last part, but it doesn't go unnoticed by him.
"Right... Because I'm a Kook." He scoffs under his breath, but I was done talking to him. I was annoyed that he would think that way of my friends but more upset that he tried to judge JJ without knowing a damn thing that went on in his life.
It was silent the rest of the way to John B's, and as we pulled up I threw my bag over my shoulder and pushed the door opened. "Thanks." I said before slamming the door, not wanting for him to say anything back, and rushed off towards John B's house hoping for the best.
There was heavy rock music playing as I approached, and the sight of lights hanging on trees caught me by surprise, John B stopped in front of me. His hands grab my shoulders as he pulls me closer to him, "You sure you're okay to do this?"
I try to move around him but he pulls me back. "I mean it. I don't want to hurt you if you can't be there for him because of your feelings I understa-"
"John B just get the fuck out of my way and let me get to him!" I shout, all my anxiety boiling over as I push his arms off of me. I find Kiara and Pope standing on John B's stairs staring forward, Kiara had tears in her eyes, and Pope's mouth was parted.
I followed their gaze, I instantly tense up. JJ sat in a hot tub, with a dozen lights around him and a bottle of champagne in his hands, giggling to himself. "He's had at least three bottles of champagne to himself already..." John B whispers to me.
"JJ... Where did you get this money?" Kiara asks him as he pulls the sunglasses down on his nose. "Stole it from my old man." He smirks at her, my heart beats faster as I get closer. The bloodstain under his nose caught my eye, "Can yall stop being so emotional! For fucks sake!" JJ shouts, ripping his glasses off his face and throwing them out of the hot tub showcasing his black eye to all of us.
"It's not like he was going to use the money for anything good, it would have been used on like, drugs or something! I used it for my friends, no... No fuck that," He stands and I feel my heart plummet to the ground as I scan over at least four giant bruises scattered across his stomach, I could hear the gasps from Kiara, Pope, and John B. "I used it for my family! So would you just get in th-" JJ's eyes caught mine and he stopped mid-sentence.
I move closer, tears pooling in my eyes at the mess of bruises all over JJ's body and face. He stands frozen in the hot tub, eyes never leaving mine as I approach him. The tough front JJ had been holding began to chip away the closer I got, his lip beginning to quiver.
"JJ..." I whispered as I got to the side of the hot tub, kicking off my vans and swinging my leg over the side. "No, no! Stop being e-emotional, Lena!" His voice cracks as I get inside.
"JJ..." A tear slips down my cheek, "It's going to be okay." I tell him, only seconds later I'm catching the frail boy in my arms as he falls into me. His arms grip me tightly, the water soaking my clothes as I hold onto him. His body shakes with sobs, while I try and hold back my own so I could be there for the boy.
"I can't fucking do it anymore!" He sobs, his hands pulling at my shirt as he grips it tightly. John B, Pope, and Kiara joined the hug, wrapping their arms around me and JJ.
One by one, everyone began to let go. It felt like ten minutes I stood there holding JJ in my arms, and I had no intention of letting go. His hold on me never loosened even when he slowly began to calm down. I rest my chin on JJ's head, listening to his sniffles into my chest.
I was heartbroken. I knew Luke hit JJ, but I have never seen him full of so many bruises from his father. I wish holding him would put back all the little pieces that Luke broke inside of him, that take away all the pain the world caused this amazing boy in my arms.
That's what I should have wished for.
I didn't notice until I was pulling away from JJ, that the rest of our friends had left us alone out here. JJ's hold on me tightened like he thought I was trying to leave him too, and it almost made me want to cry. "Let's go inside, okay?" I whispered to him, placing a soft kiss on his temple as I pulled away.
JJ locks his hand with mine, squeezing as if I was going to slip away from his touch. He follows me out of the hot tub with his head hung low, slightly tripping over his own feet due to the amount of alcohol in his system.
As we walk past the living room, I make eye contact with Kiara on the couch. "Why don't you go shower, JJ?" I tell him as I lead him towards the washroom, he immediately agrees without saying one word. Just as I'm about to leave him alone in the bathroom, his hand grips my wrist turning me to face him.
He didn't say anything, but his eyes told me enough. He wanted me to stay, he didn't want me to go. I nod, a silent agreement between us before I close the bathroom door behind me.
I go back towards the living room, collapsing onto the couch beside Kiara. She looks at me with sad eyes, "John B went to stay at Sarah's... He said to tell you to take his room tonight." She squeezes my hand before standing. "I'm going to head home, will you be okay?"
I nod at her with a sad smile, she nods back and turns to go toward the front door. She stops just as she's about to leave, and looks back at me over her shoulder. "I'm happy he has you. You're what he needs, L."
I sat back on the couch once I'm left alone, listening to the sound of the water running in the bathroom overwhelmed with thoughts about JJ. Just as I hear the water turn off and I'm about to stay up, my phone goes off.
I pull it out, to find a text from Ayden on my lock screen.
Ayden Sower
I'm sorry I got upset. I hope JJ's alright. Text me tomorrow LeeLee
"Lee?" I look up to find JJ standing in the doorway with wet hair stuck to his forehead and clothes in his hands. "I got you clothes to wear..." His words were slurred as I locked my phone, not bothering to text Ayden back.
I take the clothes out of JJ's hands gratefully before taking his hand back in mine. "John B said we can take his bed tonight." I told him, "Do you want me to stay...?"
JJ's eyes widened as he nodded his head rapidly, "Please..." He whispered back, squeezing my hand. "Of course, always..."
I drag the tips of my fingers along JJ's bare back as he lays on his stomach, his arms underneath the pillow as his face looked up at me. I sat beside him in the sweatpants JJ gave me to wear, and one of his oversized tee-shirts.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask him gently, JJ shakes his head. "I just... Want to be here with you." He answered, closing his eyes and sighing. I wanted to just be here with him too, feeling him beside me and the feeling of his skin on mine. I knew it was wrong and that it wasn't going to help me move on from him, but I have missed the feeling of laying next to JJ. I missed holding him in my arms and pretending for a few moments that he was mine to have, for a few moments I didn't need to remind myself that I have to let him go... For a few moments I could be selfish and forget about all the hurt loving him causes. He needed me, right now... I needed him, too. We'll face reality tomorrow, we'll hold onto each other for tonight.
His eyes stare up at my face as I run my fingers along his back. A soft smile on his lips that I could see only due to the small amount of light shining in through the window, "I lied to you..." JJ whispered, causing my attention to turn back to him.
"What do you mean, J?" Our voices are hushed as we speak to one another, I knew he was just blabbering random shit because of the alcohol he took tonight, reminding myself of how many bottles of champagne that John B said he'd had.
"I told you I pushed you away be-because I didn't want to ruin our friendship," I wanted to giggle at the hiccup that followed his sentence, but just smiled instead and watched my fingers move against his back.
"That was my lie." I glanced over at him, he was no longer smiling. There was another emotion I couldn't put my finger on, one that made my heart beat faster suddenly aware of the words coming out of JJ's mouth.
"I..." He giggled to himself. "I didn't know it at first because I don't know what it felt like... I never got it from Luke," I frown at the mention of his asshole father. "But I was starting to watch you sleep and your laugh became my favorite sound," He yawns, and I swear he could hear my heart beating against my chest.
"I think I've always known dude... You're Lena Boggs," JJ's voice grows quieter as he keeps talking. "It took me a long time to figure it out but..."
Then he said those words... The words I've been waiting for, for as long as I could remember. The words that I prayed for at night, found myself crying over until I fell asleep... I had to face reality tonight, tomorrow couldn't wait.
"I've been in love with you for a while, Lee B. It scares me, why does it scare me-me?" My heart pounded against my chest so hard I swear I thought it was going to burst out of my chest. Tears blurred my vision as I faced the wall of John B's room, biting down on my lip to try and not let them slip down my cheeks.
"I miss your blonde hair..." He admits, barely above a whisper. I begin to hear snoring beside me, turning to find that JJ had fallen asleep.
I have wished to hear those words come from JJ Maybank for as long as I could remember...
So why don't I feel the way I thought I would?
- - - -
HELLLOOOO, IM GOING TO TRY AND UPDATE AGAIN TODAY.
Just a reminder that I KNOW the hot tub scene doesn't happen like this, and that's not how JJ got the money- But this is my own twist of the story, obviously following a different story line :)
XOXO
A