Aron looks stunning, as always. Wearing a black T-shirt with black pants and white sneakers. He doesn't look real. His golden arms shine in the sun.
"Didn't I tell you not to come?" I say listlessly.
"Well, I figured you'd need the support." He smirks.
I walk up to him and fall into his arms.
He holds me tenderly.
I sigh.
I'm glad he's here.
He drives to my house in my car. I lean against the window and almost fall asleep.
"How'd it go?" He asks after a long silence.
I sigh. "Fine."
He waits for me to say more.
"That's it?"
I nod.
"What'd you talk about?" He asks.
I sigh. "You know, I really don't wanna talk about it. One therapy session's enough."
"I'm just curious."
"Well, how did your therapy go?" I retort.
We made a deal the day after I made the therapy appointment that Aron would get therapy for his crap too. This way I don't feel like such a nutcase.
He doesn't answer.
I look at him and sit up.
"Did you even go?" I ask, agitated already.
He sighs. "I'll go next time."
"Wow. You have absolutely no right to be interrogating me about my therapy when you don't even go to yours!"
"We have different stories, okay? I'm only doing this out of solidarity and you―"
"Oh, so you're saying you don't need it? Are you delirious?" I pull away.
"Well, I'm doing fine, aren't I?"
"Barely! You can barely keep it together when you're anywhere near Chase,"
Aron clenches his jaw upon hearing his name.
"You have anger issues." I say.
"Oh please! I never touched that guy."
"Because I stopped you! You need help just as much as I do! The worst thing is you can't even admit that. You're a fucking hypocrite!" I scream.
He pulls into the driveway.
"I'll go next week." He promises.
"You better." I growl and get out of the car.
I slam the door.
***
It's Saturday. Which means it's time for dinner with Chase, Loren and their dad. I walk onto the pavement of the huge house. How come both their parents are so loaded? Not fair.
While the house where they live is very light and bright, this villa is more warm and familial. It has a cabin kind of vibe to it. The black gate creaks creepily as I open it. It sends shivers down my spine and while it's not the same creak, it brings me back to Neil's house.
Come on, snap out of it. I tell myself.
I take a breath and follow the path of gray gravel to the door. The garden's quite unusual. The grass is uncut and there are wild flowers everywhere. I walk the steps up the porch and knock on the door using the golden knocker.
Chase opens the door not even a second later. He totally saw me pull up.
He smiles bright upon seeing me, exposing his braces. He looks like a twelve year old fangirl. In the face, anyway.
"Hi."
"Hey, Sky." He smiles.
Oh God, this is giving me flashbacks.
"Come on in." He moves aside, holding the huge wooden door.
I walk into the house and the inside's as warm as the outside.
So many wood colors. The carpet is a warm red that leads you to the dining area.
"Um, everyone's in the kitchen." Chase says leading me the opposite direction.
The kitchen is light, it's covered in cream tones and sunlight is flooding in from the windows.
Steven and Loren are busy cooking.
"Sky's here." Chase says happily like an excited dog.
Why is he like this?
I smile flatly and wave my hand.
"Ah, Sky! I'm so happy to see you." Steven exclaims. He does seem very happy.
All this attention's making my skin crawl.
"Nice." I sigh.
Loren doesn't say anything. She just keeps cutting vegetables.
***
We're sitting at the big rustic brown table and before us is a feast.
A stuffed turkey, mashed potatoes, vegan meat balls, sushi rolls, chicken pot pie, pumpkin soup, tomato soup, both vegan and non vegan versions, stuffed bell peppers, a vegetarian and a chicken salad, and all kinds of drinks.
I blink a few times.
"Wow." I say.
They all chuckle a little.
"Do you guys always do this?" I ask.
"Only when we have a special guest over." Chase smiles.
The way he says special makes me really uncomfortable.
"Well, let's not let the food get cold. Let's eat!" Steven declares.
And we do. Everyone just takes whatever they like and put it on their plate. In the meantime Steven is talking about his work full of passion, throwing in the occasional joke.
It's actually... nice. It's like a real family.
A family I don't belong to.
Suddenly I feel sad. When am I going to have a family? Could I ever have a family as nice as this one?
Probably not. I'd probably fuck that up even if I did get the chance.
Like I'm fucking things up with Aron.
"Hey, you okay?" Chase whispers while his dad laughs and talks with Loren.
He notices everything.
"Yeah, fine." I lie.
It's after dinner now and we had three deserts! I'm so full. Their food was nice. A bit bland next to Aron's but nice.
Chase insisted that I come to his room. Which I said no to but then I remembered why I'm here in the first place. To keep Chase company. To keep him content.
I sit on his bed and look around the muted green colored room. It's different from his other room. No posters or anything. It's pretty plain.
Chase joins me on the bed.
I instantly want to get away. I resist.
"What's wrong?" Chase asks.
I'm surprised by this question. I didn't think he brought me here to talk.
"Um... Nothing."
"I can see that isn't true. You got all quiet during dinner. Tell me." His eyes are big and searching.
"I just.." I sigh. "You have a really nice family, Chase. I just wondered if I was ever going to have one. My home situation isn't exactly.. ideal. Sometimes I just wish I were someone else." I say this, looking at the wall.
"I get that. I feel the same way."
I pull up an eyebrow.
"Why? Your family's perfect."
"Did you see my mom at that table? She's always out with her boyf― I mean my stepdad. She's kind of changed since the divorce. She doesn't seem to care so much for us anymore."
"Well, at least you have your dad."
"True. But you have.. everyone at school. Everyone in the world, actually." he chuckles. "I always wish to be you."
That idea almost makes me nauseous.
I turn away.
"You don't. Trust me, you don't."
"Why not?" He asks.
I don't answer. I can't. My throat's clamping up.
My mom, my dad, rapist, my suicide attempt, Aron.
God, I'm awful. I'm awful! I'm terrible.
"Sky?" He pulls my arm lightly.
I can feel his eyes on me, searching for an answer to my distress.
I need to leave. I need to get the hell out of here.
The door swings open. In comes Steven.
"Hey, boys. I thought I'd turn on a movie for us to watch. Sky, you're welcome to spend the night if you want."
I get up.
"No, I gotta go." I answer curtly.
Without looking at either Chase or Steven again I head out the door.
When I'm in my car I race away as fast as I can.
But no matter how fast I drive, I can't escape my mind.