Y/N POV
As much as I know the words I said hurt her, I make no such effort to find her and apologise.
What I said may have been wrong but what I'm busy focusing on more is the fact she had basically confessed to doing something for reasons I 'wouldn't understand.'
I would prefer to sit here at my desk and believe she's guilt free but I know that she's not... she can't be.
Convincing myself that she's innocent wouldn't bode well for me anyway. For a short while it would allow me to think about her in all the ways I want to.
The unholy thoughts of her skin against mine could be rationalised. I could, for a moment, give in to the desires I myself am still in denial of having.
At the end of the day all of the happiness will fade and one day I will in fact find out I was right after all because we all know there's no way she's innocent.
Even with no evidence I'm sure of the fact that she did something. Whether she killed him herself, had help or had someone do it for her she's guilty... she's our only connection.
If I prove it's her I have a chance at the promotion I've been dying for, for the longest time but I don't know if, despite how much I love my job, want to do that to her.
A small part of me just wants to get to know her, understand her a little more. Maybe she did do it and maybe she had an excellent reason.
Maybe she just wanted him dead.
Maybe just maybe she didn't do it at all.
The constant back and forth battle of did she, didn't she plays in my mind most of the day until my thoughts are disrupted by a phone call.
Phone call-
"Hello?" I answer the unknown call.
"Hey, it's Natasha."
"How did you- never mind what do you want?" It's pointless of me to ask how she got my number and I'd rather not talk to her for any longer than necessary.
"You still have my jacket, I want it back."
"You can pick it up from me tonight, I'll be home about 8pm." I tell her.
"Okay fine."
She hangs up the phone.
No smart remarks.
No stupid rude jokes.
I think I actually hurt her.
My heart twinges at the the thought 'I actually hurt her'.
Why do I feel guilty?
—
"Agent Y/L/N how's things going with the Russo case." Davies asks.
"Not great, we had one witness that said she saw a woman that looked like Natasha but she broke her glasses a week before the murder and her eyesight is beyond what a judge would accept as admissible evidence."
"Has she hand any contact with you other than the date?" He questions.
"No." I lie.
Why am I lying? I have no reason to lie.
"Do we have any results back from the lab?"
"Yes but strangely there's not a single strand of DNA, not one that's been picked up at least." I sigh.
"We're out of suspects and we have no evidence it was Natasha. Agent Davies I think we've reached a dead end. There's no more leads." I say to him.
"Find some, we owe that mans family and explanation."
"Yes sir."
"What do I do about Natasha?" I question.
"Find a way to get her to talk, we need to know where she was that night."
"Sir, legally we have no new evidence so we can't bring her in." I remind him.
"So we set up another date of some description, can you handle sorting that out while I deal with case that just came in?"
I don't doubt my ability to do my job but i do doubt my ability to get her to go on another date with me after I hurt her the way I did.
—
She's leaning against the door again, just like last time, when I arrive home.
"Come I'll just grab it for you." I tell her.
"No thanks, I'm not sticking around." She retorts as she moves out of the way.
"Natasha just come in, I need to talk to you." I open the door gesturing for her walk in.
"What do you want Y/L/N? I'm pretty busy today." She rolls her eyes.
"I'm sorry Natasha... I'm sorry if you got your feelings hurt but you need to grow up a little."
"Just get my jacket!"
"Natasha just come in." I tell her firmly and finally she complies.
"Now was that so hard?" I mock as I shut the door.
"What do you want?"
"I- I want to apologise." I lie.
"Save it."
"I'm saying, I'd like to take you on a proper date to apologise." I lie. This apology date would be the perfect opportunity to do what Davies asked of me.
"I'm not going on a date with you." She rolls her eyes.
Oh how the tables have turned.
I walk closer to her hooking the collar of her shirt round my finger to pull her close to me. "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings," I say in a taunting manner "please, Natasha will you go on a date with me."
"Beg me." She retorts lowly.
"What?"
"I said if you want me, beg me."
I scoff turning my head away from her taking in her request.
"I'm not gonna beg you." I let go of her shirt.
She grabs hold of my hips turning me, my back now flush against the door as her body hovers over me.
"Mph." I breathe as I fall against the door, my body shocked at the sudden movement.
"Beg me, tell me you want me. Beg me and I'll go."
"Natasha," I pause, reluctant to continue "please go on a date with me. I'm begging you."
The glowing in her eyes and the beaming smile on her face told me she was enjoying this all too much.
"Again."
"Natasha." I warn.
She tucks my hair behind my ear, leaning impossibly closer. "Again." She challenges, her lips ghosting over mine as she speaks.
Her presence, despite it's harshness, brings me solace that. Which is something I'd never expected.
In spite of all her domineering and the knowledge that she's a dangerous person, I feel safe.
"Please, Natasha... please." I say lowly.
"Since you asked so nicely," she smiled "I'll go but you better make it up to me."
"Thank you." I say quietly.
"Can I have my jacket now, or do you plan on keeping it?" She backs away from me.
"I grab it for you now."
"Thank you Agent Y/L/N."
"Y/N... just use my first name please, the formalities aren't necessary." I tell her.
She walks behind me as I root through the closet grabbing her jacket. "But you like your title."
"Agent Y/L/N?" She says in a questioning manner.
There's no doubt about it or any way around the fact that enjoyed the name she gave me.
"Yes Natasha." I say turning around, her jacket in my hand. Our bodies close together, perfumes mixing, time frozen as her those emeralds look upon me.
"Nothing I just wanted to see your face again." She says sweetly.
Keep things in perspective Y/N the date isn't for your pleasure but for your job, because your job comes first.
But there's no talking my body out of its natural reactions; all the thinking in the world won't stop my heart skipping a beat.
I shyly look away, feeling my cheeks heat up.
I clear my throat "anyway... you should probably go."
Shes so close I could just lean in and kiss her.
Don't kiss her.
Lacking intuition I move slightly closer but still, our lips don't touch.
"You're right."
I gulp.
She backs away from me heading back towards the front door. "So when is this date?"
"If you give me your address I'll pick you up on Saturday." I tell her.
"I can just meet you here." She says defensively.
"No, I'm taking you on a proper date so I'll pick you up at 7pm on Saturday."
"Fine," She says pulling out her phone "there now you have the address."
I look down at the text on my screen.
"Perfect... I'll see you then." I say.
"Okay... well goodnight."
I open the door letting her leave.
A/N- you're probably all gonna get another chapter tonight.