Sophie.
A voice woke the whimpering Sophie from her sleep. She sat up straight her bed, clinging onto to the blanket covering her from head to toe. The room was dark, cold and empty. The door was locked ever since she returned to her chambers. No one could have been there, unless they were already inside, biding their time.
"What?"
Sophie.
The whisper was very deep and very soothing, a voice she hadn't heard before. The thumps of her own heartbeat seemed to shatter the silence of the room when a loud roar took over. Her eyes opened wide when she heard the roar again, fainter this time, as if from a few distance away from when she had first heard it.
The moonlight sheets were thrown to one side of the bed as the young woman stumbled towards the window, seeing a figure in the courtyard. Somehow, she knew who it was. He looked right at her, his hair ruffling in the wind. She grabbed a cloak from the nearby dressing table and ran towards the courtyard, but by the time she got there, she saw the figure running away.
She looked around at the castle, as if to see if someone was going to wake up and let her know that she wasn't alone in having heard the roar. But nobody had. The castle was still and silent as it stood over the foggy morning. And so, she made her way towards the stables. It was usually locked up, but it didn't long for her to break it open with a huge rock nearby.
"Hey, buddy." She woke Thomas up. "Help out a friend?" She asked, receiving a whinny in reply. She pulled him out of the stables but had no time to set the saddle. Thomas nodded when she apologised for it. "Let's go!"
Thomas neighed loudly and trotted in the direction she wanted him to head in. He really was a fast horse. Sophie's wish was coming true. "There!" She pointed to the dark figure that they followed through the silent and empty town.
The figure roared once more and sped faster. Sophie's heart leapt with hope that someone would have heard it but the town remained silent. She had no time to worry about them and concentrated on looking at the dark shadows through the early morning light from the moon and the sun.
"Faster, boy!"
The darkness seemed to have disappeared as soon as they left the town. Thomas stopped instinctively as he waited for Sophie to give him instructions. She searched for the figure through the morning dew and saw him nearing the forest in the distance.
"There."
Sophie didn't care about the branches hitting her face. She tried to push them away but they didn't seem to matter. Thomas was also doing his best to not drop her. Bless him, she thought. They were heading through a familiar path as they took a sharp right in the forest.
"Beruna."
After ten minutes of riding, they finally reached the clearing, where the figure stood facing the river and the bridge. Thomas slowed down and lingered near the woods. Sophie hopped off him and landed on her knees. She looked at the figure and wondered how she was calm through all this.
"Welcome, Sophie Adams," the figure said as He turned around.
"Aslan." She knelt before Him immediately.
He placed a paw to her shoulder as if to bless her. "Rise, my child. It's about time that we met each other."
Sophie looked up at Him and a calmness washed over her as she finally understood what Reepicheep and the Professor had meant when they said that seeing Aslan was like seeing the truth and reality. "I can't believe that I'm meeting you."
"That is quite understandable with the way you've made your way in Narnia. I'm sure that you have a lot of questions. Why don't you tell me what is bothering you?"
Sophie blinked several times. How had He known? "Why didn't anybody hear you back at the castle?" She asked, starting with the recent question that she was wondering. Someone must have heard Him.
"That's because nobody was looking for me, young one."
Sophie blinked again. That only meant that she was subconsciously looking for a way to meet Him. A lot of instances started to make sense. "Why did you ask me to follow you?"
"You need to hear something, Sophie." He pointed to the river in front of them. "Look at the river. What do you see?"
She followed His gaze, wondering why He was asking her about the river. "I see a calm river that has a bridge built on it."
"And what is the purpose of the bridge?"
"To help people move across."
Aslan looked at her. She thought that He had grown bigger in the minute that they had spent together but that couldn't have been possible. Maybe it was her eyes that were deceiving her. "Life works in a similar way, Sophie." Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "Life is like this calm river. When we make decisions, we create ripples." He put his paw over the water and ripples formed instantly that spread throughout the river. "The bridge represents the connection between people."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"You think too little of yourself, Sophie," he said as they faced each other. "You are not a nobody, definitely not in Narnia. Our decisions define who we are. This bridge can be knocked by one wave. You need to decide whether to make the wave or not."
"I don't...."
"We'll meet again, Sophie Adams."
He roared.
"Aslan!"
Sophie woke up, facing darkness yet again. She was in her room and had never left it in the first place. "It was a dream."
In the morning, she took some bread from the kitchen and told Nina that she would going out for time. Nina offered to accompany her, offering to listen to her problems but Sophie had already told her what had happened the previous night. She did not want to talk about it and she certainly did not want to relive it.
"Thank you. But I think that I should go alone."
"Be back before lunch!"
Sophie took Thomas to Beruna. The horse could feel her uneasiness and cooperated as such. He kept neighing that made her rub his mane. "It's okay, buddy. Everything is alright." They stayed at the fjord the entire day where Sophie passed the time by throwing thrones into the river to create ripples like Aslan had told her in the dream. What had He meant by her belonging in Narnia?
She walked across the bridge twice, hoping and praying that He would show up. After all, He did tell her that they we would be meeting again. Perhaps it was not that day. Then why did He bring her to Beruna? Maybe it was because that was where she had met Narnians for the first time. And that was where she discovered magic for the first time.
She wanted to wait, and would have done it till nightfall if that's what it took, but Thomas was fidgeting and moving around, clearly hungry. She hadn't thought it through, only having wanted to meet Aslan again. "I'm sorry, buddy. You must be hungry." She caressed his face. "Let's go back."
Sophie headed to the Professor's study to show him the ring as promised to him. She was called inside after she knocked, but when she walked inside, her breath caught.
Caspian was there.
"Morning," she said, leaving out the 'Good' since there was nothing good about it anyway.
The young king looked at her, pain clutching his heart. He knew that they would have met each other again but he did not think it would hurt this much. "Thank you, Professor," Caspian said and headed for the door. He looked at her for a split second and then at the ground. "Good morning," he said before leaving the room.
Her eyes saw him leaving, leaving her guilt-stricken. She hated what she had done but it was what had to be done. It was what Narnia deserved. She was not capable of whatever Caspian thought her to be. This was what was right.
"Good morning, dear," the Professor spoke, breaking her out of the trance. Caspian had been vague about what had happened between him and Sophie, but the Professor was a clever old half-giant. It didn't take him long to join two and two together. "How was your day yesterday?"
"I'm not sure." She told him as she sat down before him. "How is the prophecy coming along?"
"Glenstorm is yet to return to me with it, dear."
"I'm really excited to read it." She tried smiling, but everything was a facade somehow. Caspian's clenched jaw was still before her eyes. She had hurt him more than she had hurt herself.
"Are you here with the ring, dear?"
"Yes." She removed it from her neck and handed it to the Professor, who gave the same reaction as Caspian had. "Is everything okay, Professor?"
"Can I borrow this for some time, Sophie? There are some answers that I wish I knew about. If I was an all-knowing being, I would have the answer to that question."
The Professor dismissed her, having wanted to do some research about the ring. Even then, Sophie was unaware of what the truth was because she put down herself. She was not anyone special, that's what she kept thinking.
A few days went by and in this time, the two youngsters did not see each other, both distracting themselves with respective works. Caspian attended the Council meetings while Sophie spent every day down at Beruna, waiting for Aslan. She would pack her lunch and dinner and take several apples for Thomas as she waited by the bridge, wanting only one glimpse at Aslan. She needed answers and He was the only one who could give them to her.
When the Professor had asked her about her absence at meal times, he had his other clue while Sophie had some information. "He was talking in metaphors. Something about decisions and ripples...."
"Dreams are supposed to be a mystery, dear. Maybe you should try not thinking about it. Sometimes, dreams can drive you mad."
"But what if he comes to the fords when I'm not there?"
"Sophie." He took her hand in his and patted it. "Let it go, dear. He may never come there. You cannot waste your time. Think about His words and apply them in real life."
The Professor was right! Maybe Aslan was right too. Maybe Sophie was thinking too little of herself. She decided to take some time off of thinking about the dream and there was a right distraction waiting for her as a loud noise came from the main hall.
"What is happening?" Sophie asked, her hands on her hip as she saw several pieces of furniture being moved around. "Not another ball, I hope." She smirked.
"No," Alexandre laughed. "You don't know?"
Sophie shook her head. "The suitor has come for the king," informed Evelyn.
The smile on Sophie's face faded into an oblivion. "What?"
"We were cleaning out the castle once again because of it," said Marcus.
"Where was I when they came?"
But Sophie already knew the answer - Beruna.
Everyone had felt the sudden space that Sophie had needed after the night of the ball, but they had assumed that she must have known about the suitor that had been coming for their King.
Nina's gaze fell on the girl, feeling her distress and hurt. "Go ahead for breakfast, Sophie. Everyone! Get back to work!"
Sophie walked into the dining hall as she always did and saw Caspian and the Professor talking to each other, seated in their usual places. Both of them became silent once she walked inside. She clenched her hands and unclenched them. There was no point being hurt. She couldn't bear to look at Caspian as she took her seat beside Trumpkin, who had taken her usual one by Caspian's side. She was glad in a way because she was the one who told Caspian that he needed to be with someone from nobility, not her.
"Good morning, Sophie."
"Morning."
"Yes yes. Morning to all of you," said Trumpkin and drank the water in his goblet in one gulp, it being too early to have wine.
"Good morning!"
Sophie's head turned towards the main entrance. She saw a gorgeous woman her age that walked inside with full confidence. She took a seat beside the Professor and spread the table cloth over her lap.
"Good morning, Lady Mirza," Caspian spoke.
"She's the daughter of the Duke of Galma," whispered Trumpkin to Sophie.
Lady Mirza noticed the other guest that had joined them for breakfast who had been missing ever since she had arrived at the capital town of Telmar. "And who might you be?" She addressed Sophie.
"I'm Sophie Adams," said Sophie, who couldn't believe that she was being spoken to directly by another royal. Her plan to melt into shadows was still on as far as she was concerned.
"She's our guest," said Caspian, making Sophie look at him.
He had acknowledged her presence.
"Oh, the girl from the Other World."
There was arrogance in her voice every time she spoke because Lady Mirza was raised up in a different way than Narnians or Sophie for that matter. In her culture, promises and words were given a lot of importance. Galma was neither a part of Narnia nor Calormene, but they followed both the traditions. They did not believe that any culture was superior or dominant. That's what made Galmanese very prideful.
One crucial detail that the different rulers all across the seven nations made sure of was to never discriminate against anyone based on their faith. As Caspian had said, Narnia was a free country. People could preach what they believed in as long as they did not harm the other beliefs. Although Calormene had participated in some harmful activities in the past, that was not to be held against them in any way because change happens only over a period of time. Caspian made sure of that. No one was to be treated as savages or be called so in any way. They were all human beings and Narnians alike, supporting what they believed in.
Caspian, who had already met Aslan himself, had no doubt that He was the true King of the world. But as for Sophie, she had been raised in different cultures and she had adopted all of them. She believed that all religions were one and the same because there was only one ultimate force in the universe. She preferred to leave it unnamed even after meeting Aslan and nobody could change that for her.
When Nina and Evelyn came out with breakfast and set it down in front of us, Sophie and Caspian thanked them at the same time, just as they had done on the first day they ate together. But Lady Mirza hadn't, having been conversing with the Professor. That hurt Sophie somehow and Caspian, being who he was, thanked the staff on behalf of everyone.
Sophie tried to stay silent the entire time but Lady Mirza kept talking to her, triggering Sophie's flight of fight response which made her think why that was so. She was in no way upset about whatever was going on. I wasn't sad! Why would I be sad? I was fine!
That night, Sophie took the courage to go to the tower. She found it empty and the weight on her chest eased. She sat down and looked over Narnia for a while until the familiar clattering returned. "Sophie! You came."
"Yeah, I did." She immediately stood up to give Caspian the respect that he deserved, knowing that it was time to leave. It was Caspian's place, not hers. She wouldn't intrude even if it meant being alone in her room.
"I wasn't sure that you would and coming here without-"
"Can we talk?"
"Yes." He sat down opposite to her. "I haven't brought anything with me unfortunately."
"Do you want to share?" She asked, moving to sit next to him and giving him one half of the blanket that they wrapped around themselves.
The two of them sat in silence, looking only at the empty gravel before them and the evershining stars the seemed to be their roof. The night was a warm one, or perhaps it was the feelings of two confused friends that was making everything else seem different.
"This is nice," he whispered, too low for anyone to hear.
"Caspian? I'm sorry. I reacted badly the other day and I know I shouldn't have. I hope you can forgive me."
"There is nothing to be forgiven for," he said, trying to search for her eyes. "I caught you by surprise. It was my fault, really."
"No, it was my fault. Please don't argue and just accept it."
"Apology accepted."
"Thank you."
They sat there in silence once again before he spoke. "Can I ask you something? Will you answer it honestly?"
"I'll try."
Caspian inhaled, preparing himself for the answer that she would give him. "Do you feel the same way?"
Sophie looked into his pleading eyes and broke down. The pain in her chest was starting to build up but she was resisting the urge to scream at thin air. "You deserve better than me, Caspian." She stood up, letting the shawl fall from her shoulders. "It's good that you called Lady Mirza."
Caspian stood up as well leaving the shawl lying on the floor like his heart had been for several days. He wasn't going to let there be a miscommunication between them and he was certainly not going to let her leave without giving her an explanation and without receiving one in return. "Lady Mirza had planned to come here long before I met you, Sophie. The Duke of Galma only wants us to meet each other. Nothing has been fixed."
There was a ray of hope that flashed before Sophie's eyes but it went past really quickly. She meant it when she said she would have to be the strong person between the two of them. Even if it hurt her. "You should think about the benefit of your people."
The crickets of the dark took this moment to fill the hush that seemed to have fallen over all the lands. "You're right. I should be thinking about my people."
She had chosen her words carefully and it was up to Caspian to make her wishes come true.
"It's settled then."
"It is."
But before leaving, Sophie realised that she wanted to answer his question. He had a right to know as much as he had given her a choice to it. "I do feel the same way Caspian," she said, turning around. "I have feelings for you as well. I always have."
*****
If you are following my Narnia Instagram account (idratherliveinnarnia), you probably know the discourse on racism that is going on. That's what made me write a little about faith in this Act, which I will explain more in the future. I want to make sure that Narnia in my stories is never racist and that people will never be discriminated no matter
where they are from.
And about Sophie being Hindu, Muslim and a Christian. I don't believe in religions. For me, God is an ulterior being that has created us, which is what I will be imparting on Sophie too. She is biracial and can follow whatever tradition she wants to. The freedom to do so is what my Narnia will be about.
Cast
Beren Saat as Lady Arya Mirza