Meredith's POV
Cristina burst into my room and disrupted Derek and I's conversation. She shooed him away and replaced his spot on the bed next to me. Derek walked out of the ICU room to get some food and coffee for himself while we had a conversation. Cristina put both hands on my face, one on either side and looked straight into my eyes.
''Thank you for not dying.'' She moved her hands from my face and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. She rested her head on my shoulder and held onto my other arm.
''You know this constitutes to hugging.'' I said with a smile.
''Shut up.'' She said and continued hugging me. ''You're my person. You will always be my person.'' She continued to hug me for several more minutes until she finally let go due to the buzzing of her pager.
I sat in the bed alone and thought back to the dreams I had over the past few days. Derek mentioned his dreams, now I wanted to think about mine. I grabbed a notebook and began writing, I felt like they were something I should remember.
Dear person in the future reading this,
If you don't know me, I'm Meredith. But you should know me because otherwise I'm not sure why you would be reading this. I'm not going to go into detail about who I am as a person, but more of the things I have experienced in my life (seriously, it's crazy! someone needs to make it a tv show). When I was 5, my dad left. I don't really remember my life from when he was around, I just remember him being there, and then him not being there. Then, when I was older, my mother got Alzheimer's, and I had to deal with losing a second parent, maybe not physically but mentally. My mother was still there but not there. During conversations, she often thought I was a college friend of hers, not her own daughter. She used to think she was still a resident and I was her 5 year old daughter running around the hospital being a nuisance. She thought this from the comfort of her nursing home bed. Then I met Derek.
Derek and I began a relationship and then I found out he was married. That kinda ruined what we had until he finally divorced her and we got back together. But before that happened, I almost got blown up in the OR as I had my hand on a bomb in an open chest cavity. You could say that was traumatic, but that would be an understatement. And then my mother died. Honestly, her dying was not some big event in my life. Sure, it added to my internal emotional trauma, but it didn't really affect me physically. I had already lost her, and when she died, nothing really changed. Deep down, it made my mommy issues a lot worse, but at the time I didn't think it affected me. I was dark and twisty Meredith, Cristina and I were the 'Twisted Sisters'. And then I almost died (not the first time, won't be the last).
We were at a mass casualty at the docks saving people from a ferry boat crash until I fell into the icy water and drowned. Somehow, Derek found me unconscious, dead, in the water and rescued me. The doctors, my friends, almost gave up trying to recucitate me, but it was ultimately Derek and Cristina that saved me. When I was dead, I was in an afterlife sort of world. I saw my mother, Dylan Young (the leader of the bomb squad) and Doc (my dog), and along the way, Dylan told me that if I joined them permanently, I would only get whiff's of Derek and Cristina and everyone I loved. I decided it wasn't enough. A whiff of Derek and whiff of Cristina was not enough. My heart began beating again and I was alive.
The next major event in my life was when George, one of my best friends, almost died. He got run over by a bus trying to be a hero to save this poor woman. He risked his life to be a hero and I have to say, I'm proud of him. And then Izzie almost died of cancer. Luckily she was ok and made it out alive but it was still a very stressful time in our lives. Derek and I got married finally (it may have been on a post-it note but, oh well) and we were finally happy. The one night stand I was determined to forget became the love of my life.
One day, a man walked into the hospital and started shooting left, right and centre until he finally found Derek and put a bullet in his chest. Derek almost died, and on the same day while having a gun pointed at me, I had a miscarriage. We eventually got past it, we started trying for more kids until we found Zola. We adopted her and she was the centre of our lives, she made our world spin. She makes our world spin, all of them do.
One day we had a case in another state so we had to travel by plane. It crashed and Lexie and Mark were on their death beds. Derek injured his hand and couldn't operate for a while. We were stuck in those woods for a week, alone, no food, no water. We were all petrified, the sounds of Arizona screaming at her severed leg still haunts me to this day. Once I finally did get pregnant, I almost died again during childbirth as I went into labour in the middle of a super storm. I was fine, the baby Derek Bailey was fine, everyone was fine. Then Derek got a job in DC and moved away for a while. On his way home his car got hit by a semi truck and he got taken to a dodgy hospital and almost died.
At this point, everyone in my life has almost died. It was beginning to take a toll on my bright and shiny-ness. With each incident I was becoming more and more dark and twisty. I was becoming intern Meredith all over again. I went to jail for insurance fraud but we're not gonna get into that. Then I was attacked by a mentally ill patient and I almost died AGAIN. So basically, that's the core backstory of my life, I'm sure there are many details I missed, but now I want to get into the dreams I was having.
When I passed out on the OR floor, I went back to that same 'Afterlife world' that I went to when I almost drowned. It was exactly the same, except there was another person there. It was Owen. He was wandering around the halls of my Afterlife fake hospital with the rest of the people there. Dylan Young was still there, Doc was still there, and most of all, my mother was still there. I saw her and ran towards her, stopping right in front of where she was standing. She just looked at me and asked me what I was doing there. I responded with ''I don't know'' and she began answering the question for me. She said ''I know why you're here. You're here because you gave up. You quit. You decided to leave when things were too tough. We don't do that. Grey's are not quitters and we certainly aren't ordinary. I've been watching over you and at some point, I thought you were extraordinary. When you got your Harper Avery for that abdominal wall transplant, I was so proud. But right now, you are nothing more than plain, old, ordinary. You need to go back. You need to go be extraordinary again because you cannot leave there with a reputation like that. You can not leave with a reputation of being a quitter, of being weak, of being ordinary.'' And then she hugged me, something I never expected to happen. I held onto her tight, and when I finally let go I was gasping for air laying on a bed in the hospital. I disappointed my mother and she's dead. But ultimately, her disappointment in me brought me back to life. Without her, I would be stuck there with her and her criticism forever. That was my first 'dream'.
The second one happened when I had the biopsy surgery. I was standing in a grass field surrounded by trees and small bush flowers. I was alone standing in the middle of that field until I took a step forward. I blinked and suddenly, I wasn't there anymore. Well, I was still in the field but it looked a little different. Along the left side of the field was a church and some other small structures. There was also a road that lead to a cemetery that I could just barely see. To the right of me, there was a long flowing stream. The cool water tumbled over the rocks and down the stream walls until it filled into a lake at the end. And right in front of me, a coffin. Surrounding the coffin were my friends and family. Lexie was crying on Marks shoulder, Derek stood there numb just staring at the coffin. He held a bouquet of flowers in his hand along with a note. He brought the post-it note with him. He held it tightly in his hands as he stared down into the open casket. A casket where a dead me laid. It was my coffin, it was my funeral, I was dead. Or at least I was in the dream. I blinked again and suddenly we were all in the cemetery that was down that long winded road. I stood and looked down into the 6-foot deep hole in the ground and wondered, if I am dead in my dream, and I dead in real life? I watched Derek walk up to the casket and put his hand on it. He collapsed into that hand and just sobbed while standing there. He pulled himself together and instructed the team to drop me in the hole. Once I was down there, he threw the flowers and went to throw the post-it but stopped. He realised he needed some sort of reminder of our marriage together. He needed a reminder of me. And then as soon as they threw a handful of dirt on my coffin I woke up to Derek's blue, dreamy eyes. That was my second dream.
The third one happened during the tumour removal surgery. I was back in that icy cold water that I almost drowned in during my intern year. I tried to swim, I tried to stay afloat but my legs and arms were tiring. I was becoming out of breath, it felt like there was no air to breathe. And then I realised what I had to fight for. I had Derek, I had Cristina, I had Zola and Bailey and Ellis, I had Lexie. I had the hospital where I was chief. After all these years working at that hospital, I finally became Chief. And lastly, I couldn't disappoint my mother. I couldn't be ordinary. I kept struggling to stay afloat, I tried to swim to the edge to see if there was an exit somewhere, and then I felt something pulling me under. The tumour was pulling me down, deep into the ocean. I kicked and tried to get it off my leg. I tried to breathe, I needed air, but there was none. There was only water. And just as I thought I would die, the tumour let go. Tom must have removed the tumour in real life at that exact moment, something bad must have happened for me to have been on the brink of death in my dream. I swam to the surface and gasped for air. When I opened my eyes above the water, I wasn't in the ocean anymore, I was in a hospital bed. Derek looked at me and kissed me. He gave me my 5 perfect seconds, the ones he promised before surgery. And that was my last dream.
Future person reading this, as you can see my life was crazy. I could have 17 seasons of TV show made on it's plot (that was a nudge for you to write a script and take it to producers) My life may have been crazy, wild, unrealistically tragic, but it was my life and I loved it. I loved all the memories I made, all the people I met, all the patients I saved. I may have almost died several times, everyone may have almost died several times, but we made it out alive in the end. If you are reading this, I may be dead, I may have Alzheimer's, I may be perfectly normal and old, but please, pass it on, share it. Let people know the inside thoughts of the Meredith Grey, daughter of surgical legend Ellis Grey.
Sincerely,
Twisted Sister no.1 - Meredith <3
I closed the notebook and put it on my bedside table. I placed the pen on top and closed my heavy eyes and drifted off to sleep.
Cristina's POV
I hurried into my patients room and saw her sitting upright in bed waiting for me.
''What! You're ok? You paged me 911!'' I threw my hands out in front of me.
''I'm hungry. There is no decent food in this joint. Also, all the TV stations suck!'' She complained.
''You know what, since you're so bored and I have nothing to do, we're gonna go on a little walk. C'mon, get in the wheelchair.'' I pulled the wheelchair out from the corner of the room and helped her into it. We walked out of the room and made out way to the elevator.
I clicked the button and we waited impatiently for the elevator. The elevator dinged and the large metal doors swung open. Stefan was inside the elevator standing towards the front near the doors. He stepped out of the way and I wheeled my patient Katie into the elevator. I nodded at Stefan as a greeting and we went up to the next floor. At the next floor Lachlan stepped in and stood just behind Stefan. As the doors were closing, a hand struck through and the doors repelled it. They opened to reveal Elena walking into the elevator before she stood right next to Stefan. The doors finally closed and the elevator began going down. I laughed to myself and moved over to Stefan.
''I bet you wish you took the stairs right about now.'' I laughed again to myself and stepped back to my patient. Stefan looked back at his ex-best friend and then over to his girlfriend and dropped his head to stare at his feet.
A light began to flash near the buttons of the elevator. A big red button flashed in our faces and then the lights dimmed. A siren went off for 5 seconds while the elevator came to a crashing stop. The elevator had malfunctioned and we were stuck. We were trapped, five of us and a wheelchair were trapped in an elevator.
''Oh you've got to be kidding me.'' Lachlan said as he brought his hands to his forehead.
''What's happening?'' Katie said as she sat in the wheelchair confused.
''We're stuck.'' I said as pressed some buttons receiving no response. Stefan began pressing random buttons but nothing helped. Stefan, Elena kept exchanging looks and resisted eye contact from Lachy. Silence filled the small room, awkward tension between the 3 of them could be felt by all of us.
''Are you guys... ok?'' My patient asked Elena, Stefan and Lachy.
''Yes.'' Elena said at the same time as Lachy and Stefan.
''We're fine.'' Stefan said simultaneously.
''Yep.'' Lachy spoke over the top of them.
''Well you don't seem fine.'' The patient questioned further. I stood in the corner trying to contain my laughs.
''We're fine.'' They all said at the same time.
''Okay, out with it.'' I instructed. I wanted to know the juicy gossip that would soon be all around the hospital.
''You can say whatever you want to say and it wouldn't leave this room. Because I don't think we're ever leaving this room. So, sort out whatever issues you three have and we will be innocent bystanders eagerly watching with our invisible popcorn.'' Katie laughed as she turned her wheelchair to face them.
''I don't have any issues, it's them.'' Elena pointed to Stefan and Lachlan before she moved to my side of the elevator.
''Okay, how about this. I will be the mediator. You guys say whatever you need to say and I will mediate, I will make sure you don't strangle each other while I also give you helpful advice.'' I said as I crossed my arms and walked up to them. They agreed and began talking to each other.
''I thought we sorted this problem out the night I arrived? What happened to 'not dwelling on the past' and 'looking at how your future played out'?'' Lachlan imitated their conversation from that first night.
''I woke up the next day and realised I was an idiot. That's what happened.'' Stefan said matching his tone.
''It still doesn't change the fact that without my lie, your life would be totally different.''
''But if you just told me, it probably would have ended up the same way, except I wouldn't hate you.''
''You don't hate me, you're just mad.'' Lachlan spoke back.
''Okay, I'm gonna step in. Firstly, Lachie, don't invalidate his feelings, it's not helping the situation. And secondly, what on earth happened to make Stefan this mad?'' I interjected. I put my hand between their faces to break the angry tension between the two of them and to direct their focus to me and my question.
''I'll break it down for you, Cristina. I was dating this girl Olivia and she was cheating on me with one of my friends. It wasn't Lachlan, but he knew the whole time. I found out about the cheating and I found out that he knew and didn't tell me so I left and moved here.''
''You were peacefully oblivious! I couldn't break your heart like that.''
''But she was breaking my heart! And you telling me would've helped me move on. I would've had my best friend to help me get over it. Instead I was alone.''
''Again, I'm gonna step in. Stefan has some great point Lachy. You did kinda betray him, you chose your friendship with the other guy over your friendship with Stefan. Maybe you had good intentions but you executed it totally wrong!'' I said, again, putting my hand between their faces.
''Can I say something? Hi, I'm Katie. I know I'm a patient and you're a doctor but we're are both human beings. Look.. Dr Gilbert, Dr... Mackintosh made a big mistake, I get that, but he wouldn't be here if he wasn't sorry. He wouldn't be here if he didn't value your relationship. At least he's putting in effort unlike my ex.''
''Your ex, please go on.'' I said trying to change the subject.
''I'll tell the story once they sort out their issues. My story is messy and emotional and I might cry so I'm not gonna get into it while they are still fighting, the negative energy is making me sad.''
''Okay, Stefan, what can I do to earn your forgiveness? There must be something.'' Lachy pleaded as he was sick or arguing, sick of the hatred. Stefan stayed silent for a while until he perked up and opened his mouth to speak.
''Actually... I have something in mind.'' A light bulb went off in Stefan's head. He had an idea.
''Please, I'll do anything.'' Lachy pleaded.
''Anything?'' Stefan smiled cheekily and crossed his arms.
''Anything!''
''Okay. Well, to earn my forgiveness you have to... you have to sing 'No Air' By Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown. But, you also have to perform that song while standing on the counter at Joe's...''
''Really, that's all?'' Lachy happily questioned Stefans task.
''In your underwear.''
''Oh my go- Ok! Sure!'' Lachy said hesitantly with an awkward chuckle. The elevator lights came back on and it dinged. The doors flew open to a concerned Richard and Derek with an electrician beside them. We rushed out of the elevator and went on with our surgical days.
*later that night at Joe's Bar*
Stefan's POV
''Okay, I have an announcement to make. See, my friend here, he wants to sing a song for all of you. He just really loves this song and wants all of you guys to hear him cover it. I give you, Lachlan Mackintosh.'' I stood on a chair in the bar and announced him through a microphone. Lachlan walked over in his underwear and stood on the counter. I walked over to my group of friends and pulled out my phone.
''Ha-Hey guys! So umm, I'm just gonna sing.'' He took a deep breath and held the microphone to his face.
''If I should die before I wake,
It's 'cause you took my breath away
Losing you is like living in a world with no air, oh
I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave
My heart won't move, it's incomplete
Wish there was a way that I can make you understand
But how do you expect me
To live alone with just me?
'Cause my world revolves around you
It's so hard for me to breathe
Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air
Can't live, can't breathe with no air
That's how I feel whenever you ain't there
It's no air, no air
Got me out here in the water so deep
Tell me how you're gon' be without me (Me)
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe
It's no air, no air
No air, air
No air, air
No air, air
No air, air'' He stopped singing and the crowd began clapping. An enormous noise filled the bar, laughter, clapping, more laughter.
''Well, there you go Stefan, I did it. Do you forgive me yet?'' He questioned, still standing on the bar counter in his underwear. I stood up out of my chair crying of laughter and took a deep breath. I tried to pull myself together but I couldn't calm the laughter down.
''Yes, I do. Now get your ass over here and put some damn clothes on.'' I said while laughing. He jumped off the table and dressed himself.
''I'm going to need a lot of alcohol. Joe, keep em' coming!'' He shouted. I showed him the video and we were friends again.
Everything that happened in the past was all forgotten, forgiven and irrelevant now. All I could think about, all anyone could think about, was that performance. That performance was a hilarious masterpiece that will never be forgotten. It will go down in Joe's history. Joe kept the drinks coming and soon, Lachlan was laughing at himself just as hard as we were. He didn't feel embarrassment anymore, all he could do was laugh. It was 99% because of the alcohol and 1% because he finally got me back. I'm sure he's going to regret this in the morning. The alcohol, the performance, being seen in public after the performance, he's going to regret all of it. But at least he will have me, right!
*15 YEARS LATER*
a/n:
hey, so sorry I didn't update sooner. These longer chapters take longer to write. Next chapter is going to be the last chapter of this story! As you can see, there is a 15 year time jump! I really hope you love the ending as much as I do, I think it's really happy and emotional. anyway, IT'S MY BIRTHDAY ON THE 8TH OF JULY WHICH IS IN 2 DAYS!!! please vote, comment and tell me how you enjoyed the story!
word count: 4017 - HOLY CRAP