𝙸𝚗𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚊𝚢: 𝙳𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚜𝚖𝚜 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚔 𝚊𝚍𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖.
𝙳𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 miru56
With a tired sigh, I settled myself better in bed and tried to sleep by closing my eyes, but the fear of feeling that pain again came to mind. Athai, Mama, Appa, and Amma had been gone for half an hour, and they were also hurt by me for not asking for help. But I was also hurt by all of them. Nobody understood my side. A few years ago, everyone had to worry and despair about me. I've already given them too much trouble and I just wanted to save them. But I also admit that I was a little selfish.
"What are you thinking," A husky voice woke me from my reverie. Damn, that man...always trying to make my knees weak with his voice.
"Nothing," I said as I didn't open my eyes. I could feel him staring at me.
"Are you okay," he kept asking.
"Better now," I said and I was quiet, silence prevailed and neither of us wanted to interrupt it.
I didn't want to face him, but it was inevitable as long as he didn't move a muscle out of the room. I took a deep breath.
"Ashwineyy....I just wanted to know what I did to you," I tried to say but he interrupted me making me open my eyes quickly. I looked deep into his eyes, just trying to find any emotions. A sign of confusion. Nothing.
"Because you think that...," I started but once again I was interrupted by being grabbed by the hands. Ashwin grabbed my hands, pulling them toward him.
"So why didn't you tell me, you were suffering, shit," he said as his voice was increasing in intensity and I took another deep breath, hoping we wouldn't make a fuss.
"I didn't want to worry you," I answered in a low whisper.
"Yeah? But what did you just do? You don't what went through my head when I saw you in that state. It was like I was going back seven years ago when Arjun beat you up until you lost consciousness. Damn, Sivaangi, I won't lose you again, cuz if I do...I'm not sure if I would liv-," he said as his voice broke with every word and I suddenly pulled my hands to stop him continue his sentence. He let go of my hands and brought them to the back of his head pulling a few strands of hair.
"Do you think I wanted this," I asked indignantly, "I didn't know what was going on, Ashwineyy? I don't remember what I felt when all that happened, and on second thought, I don't want to either, because if I haven't remembered it until now, it's for some reason. God has a reason. We were on the edge. Both too stubborn and afraid to end the new fight."
"If you didn't know what was happening you shouldn't have risked it," he said as his jaw was set and he was staring at me seriously, making me more nervous.
I hated the barrier he erected when something bothered him. It was as if the old Ashwin, whom I met on the first day of consultation at Waverly Hills, had come back and all the progress we'd made so far hadn't mattered. I averted my gaze, wishing I was alone.
"Sivaangi ma.....," he started in a regretful tone.
"No Ashwineyy, you're right...," I interrupted, not wanting to argue anymore. I still hadn't rested since I arrived at this hospital. And, I was afraid this conversation would make me feel that way again. We had to cool off after what we've both been through and I think one, trying to convince the other, won't work, because we're both too stubborn for that.
"Go home, take a shower, and sleep, I'll be fine here. You have nothing else to worry about. At least until the end of the day, I don't want to be a burden to you anymore. So go, and rest, because it's no use for you to stay here since I always mess upright," I said tired of everything happening around me.
"I never said that," he stated, trying to get closer, but I stopped him.
"No," I sighed, "Everything is fine. We're fine...go home and take rest," I insisted, knowing that I convinced him I averted my gaze away from him. I heard his footsteps down the hall, leaving behind a woman -mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted.
"I can't believe you did that. Do you know what could happen if he wasn't with you, chunkin," Pavithra said in a worried and concerned tone?
"Noodles manda, I swear that when we get there, I'll break you more than you already are, okay, deal," Sam said in a half-serious and half-joking tone. We all laughed together. I really am missing them both.
"Come on both, I want to distract my mind," I dropped the comment whispering, not knowing Pavithra and Sam actually heard.
"More problems than trauma and that Arjun guy," Pavithra said.
"Yes," I said.
"Ashwin...," Sam started hesitantly, after all, according to him, he was on Ashwin's side this time.
"Did you guys fight again," Pavithra asked and I nodded?
"Noodles manda, try to see his side, Ashwin is only like this because he cares about you and because he loves you. You're his life and he was on the verge of losing you," he said and I widened my eyes and bit my lip, trying to control my tears at what he said.
"I don't think that's why," I said trying to control my emotion.
"I know....what you're trying to do chunking. I know you, me and Sam are going to give you some time ok," Pavithra replied in a consoling tone.
I know butterflies it has been a long time since I updated. I wouldn't have updated if it wasn't for miru56. She has been asking me for the past 1 week with her funny comments asking me to update. She really did lift my mood up, motivating me to update, so thanks to her. And all thanks to everyone who was commenting on my inbox and messages asking for updates. And also thanks to everyone who was patiently waiting for an update.
I'm not sure when I will update again as I'm not fully better yet. My mental state is not the best right now and with also moving houses, it's hard to juggle everything. So, thank you to everyone who is understanding me.
Now, moving on please tell me how this chapter was....what did you think about the conversation between Ashwin and Sivaangi???
If I am not meeting your expectations please tell me!!!! Big hugs and kisses to all my readers and voters. Love you guys so much!