Songs for this chapter:
• Josslyn - Olivia O'Brien
Chapter One Hundred and Seventeen:
Lexi's POV
"I'm. Going. To. Fucking. Murder. Him."
Mac winces.
James mutters under his breath from where he's standing in the doorway to my dressing room and gently tugs Emma out after him once he exits.
She opens her mouth to protest and he simply shakes his head at her. "Leave her with Mac. He'll get her sorted out."
As soon as the door to my dressing room clicks shut after them, I hurl my phone across the room at the closed door.
I need to get that stupid article about Bryce and his stupid girlfriend as far away from me as possible.
Bryce Bradshaw and new girlfriend Lydia Spears were seen roaming downtown New York City earlier this afternoon. Photos show the pair holding hands, but Bryce seemed to be uncomfortable being so close to Miss Spears.
Does this have to do with how secretive Bryce has been in the past about his relationships? The twenty-three year old singer has yet to reveal who the muse of his many love songs is, but now fans are speculating that it could have been Lydia all along and that the pair had been keeping their relationship a secret since they rose to fame under the same record label.
I could only force myself to read the first two paragraphs of the article before I started screaming like a banshee, drawing Mac, James, and Emma from their nearby dressing rooms.
As soon as I caught sight of the photo of Bryce with his arm around Lydia's shoulders that was embedded in the main text of the article, I absolutely lost my mind.
I don't think I had ever cursed as much in my whole entire life as I did once I saw that photo.
I should've avoided social media. I should have been smart enough to assume what I would see the moment I opened up Twitter, but I had just finished getting out of my Christine costume and changing into my regular clothes and I was waiting for Mac to come to my room so we could go to the stage door together and I had nothing better to do and I was just such a fucking idiot and . . .
Mac is sitting on my small pink couch as I pace back and forth across the length of the dressing room, but when I get near enough to him, he reaches out and grabs me by the waist. I'm hauled onto the sofa beside him, and even when I flail my legs and try to squirm away, he wraps me up in his arms and hugs me against his side.
I let out an aggravated puff of breath before burying my face into his shoulder and screaming again.
I don't even care how bratty and immature I'm acting right now. All I feel is anger and a sorrow so deep I need to do whatever I can to cover it up before it reaches the surface.
"I hope he's miserable," I spit. "I hope that she treats him like the lying bastard he is. He doesn't deserve to be in love, not after what he just did to me. He promised to my fucking face that we were exclusive, and now I'm going to ruin his fucking face the next time I see him."
Mac sighs and squeezes me tighter. "He isn't in love with her. You have a right to be pissed, don't get me wrong, but this just . . . doesn't seem right. I saw the way he looked at you only a week ago. And besides, this news just came out in the interview a few hours ago, and after you saw the interview earlier we had to go straight to the theatre and you had to go on stage and pretend nothing happened. You haven't had any time to process any of this, but the one thing we know for certain is that Bryce was in this very room a week ago and he brought you flowers and looked at you as if you were his whole world."
His words make that sorrow bubble up to the surface in an uncontrollable wave, and before I can get a grip on my emotions and force that sadness back down, I'm sobbing into the crook of Mac's neck.
"Oh, Lexi," he murmurs into my hair. "Let's take some deep breaths. How about you and I skip signing Playbills tonight? We can hang out down here until James is ready to go. Okay?"
I nod, and blubbering, I say, "I'm so mad. So fucking mad. But now I'm sad too. It's so confusing. I simultaneously want to punch someone and cry."
Mac lets out a deep sigh. "I know. But please don't make me your human punching bag, Lex."
I reach up and clasp the pendant of my cherry blossom necklace in my fist. It feels warm to the touch, and I squeeze the glass until it slices into my skin.
🌸🌸🌸
I'm sandwiched between James and Mac as we walk through the theatre and towards the front door. They're both holding one of my hands, and if they weren't bracketing me as we walk, I think my knees might have given out and I would have crumpled to the floor.
Why would he do this to me? I thought he would be mine forever, but now he isn't mine at all.
James lifts a hand to push open the front door of the theatre just as hurried footsteps sound from behind us.
"Lexi! Wait!"
The three of us pause.
I release my grip on James and Mac's hands and turn around.
From across the lobby, I see Vanessa running towards me.
My initial shock to see her here doesn't even have a chance to wear off before she's suddenly stopping in front of me and throwing her arms around my neck.
My arms come around her before my brain even tells them to. "Nessa? What are you doing here?"
It takes more strength than I thought I possessed to resist the urge to bury my face into the crook of her neck, inhale her familiar scent of citrus, and sob into her hair.
Because one of the hardest parts of me and Bryce's breakup was that I lost him, but I also lost the bond that I had with his family.
Somehow, it almost hurt just as much as losing Bryce.
Him and his family had become my family too, but then they were all ripped away from me in the blink of an eye.
Vanessa pulls away from me and plants her hands on my shoulders. "I need to talk to you. About Bryce. Him and Lydia are . . ."
Mac's arm is suddenly hooked around my waist and he pulls me back against his chest. The movement forces Vanessa's hands to fall from my shoulders, and she looks up at Mac and scowls.
"Who is this?" Mac whispers into my ear.
Vanessa cuts in and answers for me. "I'm Vanessa. One of Lexi's best friends. Let me talk to her."
Mac glances down at me, an eyebrow quirked up in question.
I give him a small smile, and when I pat the arm he has around me, he slowly releases me from his grasp.
"It's okay," I promise him. "She's Bryce's brother's fiancée. I'll just be a second, and then we'll head home."
I turn back to Vanessa. "I already know about Bryce and Lydia. Don't worry. It doesn't bother me."
I am thoroughly disturbed by how easily that lie rolls off my tongue.
A crease forms between Vanessa's eyebrows. "Really? How? I didn't think Bryce told you. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bothered coming here."
How has she not seen the dozens and dozens of posts about the happy couple?
I give her a small smile. "It's okay. I really appreciate you coming here. It doesn't really matter though, because I actually have a boyfriend anyway."
Vanessa's eyes widen and lift to scan Mac and James, who have formed a wall behind me.
I resist the urge to roll my eyes at the two of them and their overprotectiveness.
"It's really late, and we really need to get home. You should probably get home, too. Did you come here alone?" I ask Vanessa softly.
The crease between her eyebrows smoothes itself out as she releases a shuddering breath. "Yeah, it's just me. Matt is on his way to pick me up, but you should head home. Talk to you soon?"
I incline my head at her and give my very best Disney Princess smile. "Sure. Bye, Nessa."
I turn away from her to find James holding open the theatre door for me. I give him a small nod before he takes my hand and tugs me out onto the New York streets.
Mac follows us out, and I do my best to ignore the hammering in my chest as we start down the sidewalk and towards our apartment.
🌸🌸🌸
The moment we step into the lobby, I drop onto the nearest bench and bury my face into my hands.
What the hell is wrong with me? Why didn't I want to talk to Vanessa? She's one of my very best friends, and I was so cold and closed off towards her.
I haven't been myself since I saw the news about Bryce and Lydia. It's affected me far more than it should have, and now I'm petrified that I'm never going to be myself again.
Am I broken?
A/N: Lol.
I had literally the worst week EVERRRRR so sorry for taking so long with this chapter.
The good news is that I got a bunch of new Squishmallows this week. They are the only things that give me serotonin anymore.
Next chapter will probably be a short one again so the wait shouldn't be too long <3
(But also it's gonna he painful so sorry in advance)