Noelle Benjamin
I flutter my eyes open to the warmth of another body close to mine. I turn to my shoulder to the right side, attempting to observe the figure next to me.
You're actually shitting me.
It's Harry. He's peacefully laying on his large bicep next to me, his eyes resting like they've been restless for hours. A slight gasp escapes my lips, but it's not loud enough to wake him up. His whole torso is covered with my blanket, yet I can see his bare chest.
He's sleeping without a shirt on.
What happened? When did we get home? All I remember is getting a little tipsy at the bar, and then Harry allowed some man to fucking attack me or something, and the rest is a blur. Has Harry been here all night? More importantly, how long has he been sleeping next to me?
I continue staring at his face, the same hard look on his face sticking. I don't know what to do with him. Should I just leave him there? Or will he wake up if I get up? I feel a little lace poking my thigh as I move my leg under the sheets.
I'm still wearing my dress. Which confirms Harry brought me home last night, he wouldn't have bothered to help me change or anything. I think we got in a car together from the bar but I'm not 100% sure. I have absolutely no idea what happened after that man pushed me into the table. I do remember Niall and Zayn though. Right. Niall saved me and that's where everything goes blank. I can't fully confirm that I'm right about everything else after that.
I turn again to switch my weight to pile back down on my left shoulder. I shoot my eyes to the side table which has my phone resting on top. Shit I forgot about that. That also means Harry brought me here, laid me down, and dug in my purse for my phone knowing I would need it in the morning. It's kind of getting difficult to not like him.
I try to silently reach for the table, but it's not possible. It's too far. I'm gonna have to get up. The bed creaks as I use my elbows to hoist me upwards. My back then follows, my slightest movements causing more noise.
I swear everything is louder when you want to be quiet.
I manage to plant my feet on the floor without waking him up, my floorboards barely creaking as my toes hit the floor. Now I'm at a reasonable distance to reach for my phone. We did it boys.
I pick up my phone from the table gently, my phone home screen lighting up. The top of it reads, 8:33AM. It's a lot earlier than I thought it would be.
I look further down of the screen, my mouth opening a little.
3 New Messages from Harlow:
we've just been playing board games for the past 2 hours, are you asleep? 12:23AM
ok guess so. text me when you're up 12:26AM
P.S, i'll be there at 11AM. Stay safe and don't fuck Harry till then ;) 12:26AM
I scoff at her text. Mine and Harry's relationship status is not even close to fucking. He's crazy. He tossed me to those men last night like I was an object. As a raging feminist, I have every right to not like him. Well, that's not true. Not every right, just because he saved me, but that's old fucking news okay? So yes. Every right.
I look over my shoulder to glance at Harry. He looks so peaceful, I could just shake him awake to wipe all of that rest off of his face. But I won't because I'm not that much of a bitch. I use my fingers this time to clutch onto the bedsheets to bring my body away from the bed. I sigh quietly, almost tiptoeing to the door.
Just as I go in a 2 foot distance of the door, my eyes divert to Harry's phone next to him. It's lighting up over and over with text alerts. One part of my mind draws to the fucking conclusion to go check.
I change my path from the door to Harry's bedside. What am I doing? Why am I doing this? I shouldn't. With each thumping heartbeat, a new thought explodes through my mind. This is a bad idea. This is a bad idea. This. Is. A. Bad. Idea.
The closer I get the more my blood rushes to my head to stop me. He's gonna wake up. Definitely. I'm so fucking loud. I reach his phone, my eyes staying glued to his to make sure he doesn't wake up in the process. My hand quickly goes beside his ear, right where his phone continues to light up.
As my fingers barely graze the rim of his phone, another set of fingers grasp my wrist tightly. I let go of the little access I have to his phone and shut my eyes closed, not wanting to watch the reaction on his face. My eyes still stay closed and slightly squinted, his morning voice booming in the corners of my ears.
"Feeling sneaky are we?" His words rasp as they fall out of his mouth. Goosebumps travel along my arm when I hear how worn out he sounds. He also doesn't look like he's gotten much sleep.
"I was just—"
Before I can explain myself he interrupts me.
"Lying is a sin Noelle." Harry tells me as he uncovers himself from the blanket's touch.
I don't respond, I simply look at the floor unable to answer back. He sets his feet on the floor while using his palms to bring himself above the bed. My mouth grows dry to the sight of his bare torso and the same pants he wore last night. Every little ridge on his toned stomach compliments his soft skin. He looks absolutely breathtaking.
I blink a few times to shake myself out of my thoughts.
"Who was blowing up your phone anyway? Your girlfriend?" I asked irritatedly, not really looking for his answer.
"What if it was?" He pulls his shirt over his head while staring at me with a straight face. His curls bend when the neck of his shirt hits them.
"Shut up. Tell me what happened last night." I burst out, following his trail out the door.
I tail him as he fully makes his way out of my room. He runs his fingers through his messy hair, trying to get it back to how it was last night. It parts to a side part with his quick motions.
"Oh so you're giving me orders now? After I very kindly brought you home safe and stayed with you throughout the night?" Harry waits for me to catch up with him, my figure immediately taking the opportunity to face him.
"Yes. Yes I am." I clear up, continuing before he gets the chance to speak. "Tell me."
"I said no. That's not how this works. You don't order me around. I decide when I want to help you or not, do you understand me?" His eyes burn into mine with control. He looks like he's actually waiting for an answer. Which I'm right about, because when I don't respond, he steps closer to me. "Answer me."
"Sure. Fine." I say for the time being, his eyes softening a little.
He starts walking closer to me, and when I think he's going to push me or something, he instead walks past me, his shoulder brushing against mine. He leaves me in the middle of the living room, my body staying in my current position. He makes my blood boil. This isn't 365 Days okay? He doesn't get to tell me what to do. Harry and I barely met, he doesn't get to force answers out of me. He stands behind the counter, my pace also joining to walk over to one of the stools set at the counter.
I spin around alarmed to Harry's voice speaking.
"You were drunk, I let some shits take you, but you fought back, and then right as one of them was about to hit you, Niall stepped in and kicked his ass. You got in my car and we drove here, and on the way you fell asleep so your drunk state took over. I settled you in bed but then you asked me to stay so I stayed. Happy?" He rambles with the explanation I requested.
"Wait. I asked you to stay?" I watch him look at me from behind the counter with his elbows resting on the surface.
"Yeah and you asked for me to sleep in the same bed as you." He lets a full smirk take over his face, his eyes lighting up proudly.
I don't say anything. My bottom lip slips in between my teeth while I seat myself in front of him. We look ridiculous. I still have a $200 dress on and he still has the same Rolling Stones shirt on. I notice that he's actually wearing jeans. Those must've been annoying to sleep in, but he probably didn't want to take them off because he knew I would be uncomfortable. I'll say it again, it's becoming hard to not like him.
I watch him continue to stare into my embarrassed eyes as I decide to get up from this awkward situation. Plus this dress is getting really itchy. I hop down from the chair, the floor catching my feet. I can feel Harry's eyes on my neck as I begin to leave him to his own thoughts. A little tingle creeps up on the skin on my neck the more I walk away.
"Where are you going?" He asks genuinely.
"To take a shower. Why? You wanna join me?" I don't stop walking, I continue my path to the bathroom.
I hear an immediate response after my rhetorical question. "Oh you wish."
I disappear into the bathroom, and as I enter, my eyes immediately shoot to the mirror. God. I look fucked. There are dark circles under my eyes, my lips are dry, and my hair's extremely knotted. I stare into my own reflection's eyes for another moment until thoughts start cramming themselves into the pockets of my brain again.
I feel like something's wrong with me. Like I'm fucking mad or something. Any sane person would cry oceans when their mother dies, but I've been sitting here for two days without any issues. Yes, I did cry the night of when Harlow was asleep, but that was nothing. I cried for like 5 minutes and walked back to my room to join her. But I just can't. I can't cry. Because my stomach churns every time I remember I'm alone and it's my fault.
My mom hinted me a few things about the compromise of her safety, but I was too engulfed in my own life to care. And I had everything I could wish for, a perfect boyfriend, a best friend, and so many college acceptance letters. She tried to tell me, but I figured she was joking, or she was just watching too many true crime documentaries. We live in a big city yet we know almost everyone. No one was coming for her. She was just a single mom with a daughter in Cardiff. I just wish I listened to those doubts in my head. Because now I just have a hole in my heart that numbs any and all forms of sadness.
I look down into the sink, my hands gripping each side of it. It feels like my heart is pouring into the sink in front of me. God it hurts.
I didn't deserve to be saved.
A/N: double update boos. things are going to start picking up from here :O stay hydrated and stream nobody is listening by zayn !!
also please please vote and comment :)