{Aspen's POV}
"You freaking idiot we had everything under control!" Sorin shouts.
"How is letting her keep the gun having everything under control?! You're all stupid to just 'watch her'." Jasper replies.
"Watch your tone." Caspian commands.
I've been laying in in what I recognize as my cloud of a bed for several minutes now. I'm pretending to sleep while listening to my brothers argue. I realize I fainted earlier, I really have to stop doing that but I cant help it. Apparently Caspian, Ambrose, and Sorin knew I had the gun and Jasper refuses to tell how he found out. How could I be so stupid? Of course Ronan would find it missing sooner or later, I guess I was just hoping it would be later.
"We wont have answers until she wakes up, now all of you out." Caspian booms.
I hear footsteps leave my room and the door close softly. I let out a deep breath before sitting up. I rub my eyes to adjust to the light and when I open them, I'm greeted by the sight of Caspian casually sitting on my desk chair. I look at him with doe eyes and he keeps and intense stare fixed on me. How did he know I was awake?
"You're a very bad actress."
Crap, did I say that out loud?
"Yes, and I'd watch the language if I were you. You're on thin ice Aspen." Caspian says.
I look around my room until I'm met with my bedside table. The drawer where I hid the gun is open and the tape I used is dangling from it. I look back to Caspian and see him holding the gun, pointed to the side. Is he going to shoot me?
Caspian alone is intimidating enough to make a building fall simply under his gaze, but Caspian with a gun?
I fear for the world.
I back up to lean against the head board of my bed and keep my eyes on the gun. I wait for him to lift it and shoot. When he does lift it, I tightly close my eyes and start to hyperventilate. I cant watch my own brother kill me.
"Aspen"
I open my eyes to see the gun away from Caspian, laying on my desk.
"Did you think I was going to shoot you?" Caspian furrows his eyebrows. I look down at my bed and play with the edge of my comforter and he sighs.
"Aspen, your brothers nor myself would ever hurt you. Do you understand?"
I nod, still looking down although I don't quite believe him. I've heard it all before.
"Look at me." Caspian commands. I look up and his cold expression softens when he sees the tears welling up in my eyes.
"Why did you take it?" He asks.
"I don't know." I reply softly.
"I don't appreciate liars, Aspen. I'm giving you a chance to explain yourself, I suggest you take it." Caspian says. I take a deep breath and look into his cold eyes.
"I was going away."
"What do you mean?" He asks.
"I don't belong here Caspian. I don't know this lavish lifestyle. The giant mansion, the fancy food, getting treated like royalty, it's-it's not my place. I was going away to the forest, it's my safe place. It's silent and peaceful."
His intense gaze doesn't falter as I explain and I shift nervously on the bed before continuing.
"Of course I appreciate you taking me in and for everything you have given me. It's all just overwhelming, my whole life changed in the blink of an eye and I just needed the familiarity of the forest. I'm used to being alone and doing my own thing and there are certain things I do to keep myself grounded. I erm... hunt."
"That's an unusual hobby for a girl such as yourself." Caspian replies.
"It was a necessary hobby." I mumble under my breath but Caspian seems to hear.
"What do you mean by that?"
Not wanting to tell him the full truth, I give him a half.
"When mother died, everything was different. My only escape was to go to the forest behind our house and hunt. It kept me sane in a way, it was an escape from life."
"Aspen. I understand this move is a big change. I hope you can learn that you belong here. You were here before mother took you away and your brothers and I have missed you dearly. I'm sorry you couldn't grow up having everything you deserve but you are here now. This house is and always will be chaotic and you cant just run to the forest every time things get overwhelming. I know you used to do that before but I cant allow that here. It's for your safety Aspen and I also cant allow you to have a gun."
I sadly lower my gaze and nod.
"I understand" My voice is barely above a whisper.
"You should also know thievery is not tolerated in this household and because of you, we had to fire Ronan."
My head snaps up to meet Caspian's gaze and I'm suddenly filled with guilt and regret.
"Y-you fired Ronan?"
"We had no choice, what kind of guard was he if he could be pickpocketed my a 15 year old girl? You should also know that Ronan has a family. A wife who is pregnant and 2 young children. Their one source of income is now gone because of you." Caspian says, keeping a cold expression.
Caspian reaches into his pocket and hands me a photo of Ronan who has his left arm wrapped protectively around the waist of a woman with a baby bump. A young boy, maybe 2 years old is on his right hip and a young girl who looks to be 7 is standing in front of them.
"What's going to happen to them?" I croak out. Don't cry, don't cry.
"I'll leave that to your imagination, but I don't expect it to be pretty." Caspian replies emotionlessly.
"I'm so sorry" I whisper, trying to keep myself together but a few tears betray me.
"As for your punishment..." My eyes widen when Caspian mentions a punishment. He said he wouldn't hurt me but how can I believe him after Ronan's situation?
"I believe the guilt your feeling is enough, but if it were to happen again don't expect me to go so easy."
Caspian stands up from the desk chair and grabs the gun from my desk. He tucks it into his waistband and walks to the door. Before he reaches it, he turns to face me.
"I expect you down for dinner at 6." I furrow my eyebrows at his words. Is this guy serious?
"Okay" I reply in a whisper.
Caspian exits the room and I stare at the photo of Ronan's family. I cant believe I got him fired.
I'm so stupid. I'm so stupid. I'm so stupid.
I allow the tears in my eyes to fall freely and I wrap myself under the covers of my cloud. It's currently 4:30 and I debate taking a nap but the guilt overwhelms me. How am I meant to sleep peacefully while Ronan and his family will likely end up on the streets?
For the next hour and a half I stare blankly at the wall making up different scenarios in my mind about what will happen to Ronan and his family. It ranges from the bouncing from homeless shelter to homeless shelter to being eaten by wild animals. Some scenarios are more realistic than others.
When it's finally 6, I slowly walk out of my room with the thoughts of Ronan and his family plaguing my mind. As I make my way to the dinning room I hear faint chatter. When I finally enter, the talking stops and all my brother's eyes settle on me.
I'm sure I look a mess, I didn't bother to check the mirror but I know my hair is crazy. I'm sure I have red, puffy eyes and my clothes are all wrinkled. I silently take my seat beside Sorin and Caspian and I continue to feel the gazes of my brothers.
The food is brought out shortly after and everyone starts to eat. I can only manage to pick at my food. I don't deserve to eat if Ronan's family cant. After a few minutes of me picking at my food, Ambrose lets out a sigh of frustration.
"Eat Aspen." Ambrose says.
"I cant" I drop my fork on my plate and everyone turns to look at me.
"Goodness Caspian what did you do to the poor girl?" Ambrose turns to face our oldest brother. Caspian simply shrugs and continues to eat.
Dinner drags on for another half an hour. It consists of Ambrose constantly trying to get me to eat and the rest of my dear brothers chatting amongst themselves. I take a few bites of the grilled chicken on my plate just to get Ambrose off my back and he finally lets me leave the table.
If I go back to my room, I wont be able to shake these feelings of guilt. I cant let myself drown, I need to be strong. I decide to explore the house to distract myself.
I wander aimlessly through the hallways. Peeking in different doors, I find a library, a gym, and indoor pool, a movie room, a game room, multiple living rooms, and I stop when I find a smaller kitchen. Why my brothers need all these things is beyond me but I'm not complaining. I look around the kitchen to find it fully stocked, maybe I could bake something? That should keep my mind occupied for a while. Since this isn't the main kitchen I should be safe from encounters with my brothers.
I look through the cupboards and find all the ingredients for spicy rosemary chocolate chip cookies. It sounds like a strange combination but when Edith and I were experimenting with different recipes with the plants she found, these were flipping fantastic. Edith would often bring different ingredients from her house to 'natures squads clubhouse' so that I could practice my baking. We made a contraption with the fire pit so it would act as an oven to bake the different things I made. Ash would bring ingredients as well and we always had cooking competitions that I usually won.
I prepare the batter and I shape the cookies into balls. I set them on a baking sheet and put them in the preheated oven. I lean against the kitchen island and watch the clock waiting for 10 minutes to pass. I remember the times when mother was alive, we would always cook and bake together. Although we didn't have much money, she always made sure we were able to bake at least once a week to develop my skills. I've always imagined becoming a famous chef with my own restaurant, that dream was something mother and I shared. I'm saddened at the thought she wont be able to see the skills I developed. Why couldn't she have been there for me? Why did I have to end up with stepfather? Why couldn't my brothers have found me sooner? A lone tear falls from my eye and I quickly wipe it away.
When 10 minutes finally pass a warm aroma of sweetness and rosemary engulf the kitchen. I carefully take the cookies out and wait for them to cool. I prepare the melted chocolate to dip the cookies in and I suddenly feel someone watching me. I turn to look at the door and see Sorin leaning against the frame. We make eye contact and he walks over to where the cookies are. Can I not have a moment to myself around here? He reaches for one but I grab his arm. He looks up at me confused but I'm quick to explain.
"They're not done yet."
He nods and takes a seat on a bar stool. I feel uncomfortable knowing he is watching me but I continue with what I was doing. I take a cookie and dip it in the melted chocolate, I transfer it to a different baking sheet lined with parchment paper and sprinkle some flakey sea salt on top as a garnish. I repeat the process with all the cookies under the watchful eyes of Sorin.
(A/N these are the cookies ^ not my photo, found on Pinterest)
When they are done I take 2 cookies that have set and place the rest in the fridge. I pour 2 glasses of milk and take a seat next to Sorin, giving him a cookie and a glass of milk. I glance at Sorin out of the corner of my eye watching as he takes a bite. His eyes widen and he looks at me.
"Where did you learn to make these?" He asks.
"I made the recipe." I shrug.
"Sh*t you're going to make me fat aren't you?" He says and takes another bite. I crack a smile.
"How did you know I was in here?"
"The smell of the cookies gave you away." Sorin replies.
"Ah" Is all I can manage to say.
Sorin and I finish our cookies in comfortable silence. Eventually he gets up, goes to the fridges and grabs 2 more cookies. Instead of sitting down, he leaves the kitchen without saying another word. I let out a sigh and decide to head back to my room.
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