"are you okay?"
Jungkook asks hanging his head low to take a look at her as she bends against her knees, trying to catch her breath.
"yeah i'm-" she winces again like a few minutes before as they were walking down the hill.
"i think...my water just broke?" she runs a hand over her baggy pants and upon seeing the bloody print on her fingers, a shadow of panic escapes her face.
"i'll wait, just go get the car" she lets out a series of quick short breaths, resting her weight on a nearby tree.
"i'm not sure if i can get this far with a car" and without any hesitation he slings his arm under her knees and lifts her up in one swift motion. after a few minutes of careful jogging he sets her down as they reach the car.
once they're on the road back to the city, she takes her phone out and dials Yoongi's number, after a couple of beeps he answers.
"hello?"
"hhey...don't freak out..but we're going to the hhospital" she says through a shaky breath.
"what? what happened?" he sounds alarmed.
"just get the bags and meet us there"
"Soojin! are you okay?" he almost yells.
"i think i'm having contractions. i'm not sure yet" she answers calmly.
"just the bags?" he asks and she can hear the ruffling sound of objects over the line.
"yea-hhhh" she takes in a sharp gasp as an increasing wave of pain hits her stomach.
"how far are you?" he asks and she turns to Jungkook who's got his eyes fixed on the road "twenty, thirty minutes?" he replies anxiously.
"what? why are you so far?" Yoongi yells over the line again. she glances back at Jungkook who's starting to look a little hasty.
"well you know how the doctor advised me to go on walks? well we went, but so many people recognized us, so we went to a less crowded hill a little outside the city...it was my idea" she explains but there's only silence for a few seconds until he speaks again "just...be careful..."
she can hear the dread in his voice so she tries to keep her own as steady as she can "i will...just don't worry...i'll see you in a bit"
she hangs up before calling her doctor to inform her of the situation. she quickly guides her to focus all her attention on easing the pain through practiced breaths. as time passes in silence, closing her eyes she rests her head against the car seat and he thinks she seems to be calming down
"we're close" Jungkook says as he turns in the street that leads to the hospital, but she doesn't respond.
"Soojin?!" he frantically glances back and forth between her and the road. her face is pale and her bangs stick to her perspired skin. a quiet sigh leaves her mouth and her eyes flicker open just as he enters the hospital parking lot. but that's the last thing she sees before her vision goes dark.
•••
"yoongi..."
his half asleep mind can't detect if it's her real voice this time or just the ongoing hallucination he keeps hearing over the past few hours as he's been resting his head on the edge of the bed, next to her injected hand. he slightly moves his head and the muscles in his neck painfully tighten.
"yoongi..."
just as he's about to get up and shake the feeling off, a set of cold fingers slowly run between his hair. a shiver spreads through his body causing the hairs on his skin to stand.
he looks up unsure and a little scared. a faint smile brights up her inanimate face as she blinks slowly, clearly struggling to keep her eyes open. his face is the saddest she's ever seen and it's harder than the physical pain to bear with.
she pats the space next to her and motions for him to get in. he quickly circles the bed and gets on top of the covers, carefully steering clear of the wires.
resting his head on her chest, she takes his hand and places it on top of her belly. instantly he feels a gentle movement under his palm.
"he's been moving around a lot" she says.
"is that a good thing...right now?" he asks and she goes silent for a minute.
"i'm sure it is" she's not sure and doesn't even sound like it, but by the way he's clinging onto her, he's so visibly shaken that she can't bring herself to burden his mind any further. she thinks it's maybe her motherly instincts kicking in already.
"i called Nana by the way. i told her you're fine now but she cursed at me" he says and she laughs quietly, her breath tickling his hair.
He lets out a long sigh and she brushes the hair out of his face.
"Jungkook is really upset" he instantly regrets saying that but his ears sharpen for her response.
"i'm probably not gonna see him till after the surgery..." she pauses "...if he comes by...just make sure he doesn't blame himself for anything"
"you can do that yourself" he replies a little annoyed.
"i'm just saying-"
"don't say anything"
he abruptly sits up and presses his palms to his temples. she goes silent for a good couple minutes, considering what it all must look like to him, until she speaks again.
"we're gonna be fine" she tries her best to sound assuring as she runs a hand down his back and can feel him lean into it, but only a moment later he gets off the bed and walks towards the door without a second glance "i'll go get the doctor"
•••
a couple hours later, she sits on the edge of the bed in the blue surgery gown, waiting for the nurses to come get her. though inside the room is warm, she can feel some unfamiliar frost creep into her body.
She's startled as the door opens and Yoongi walks in. alone.
He comes to a stop in front of her. all the comfort and reassurance in her face is gone as she bites the insides of her lips.
"they're gonna come get you now" he says running a hand through his messy black hair. his crumpled black shirt hangs loosely over his shoulders. everything about him looks disheveled.
"don't be mad" she says quietly, pulling him close by the waist.
"what?" he frowns in confusion.
"you look mad" she points out, looking genuinely scared at last. he bends down and plants a kiss to her forehead.
"i'm not mad baby" he mumbles, his breath hot against her cold skin "i'm anything but mad.."
"don't be anything...just...be with me" She circles her arms around him and he does the same to her. breathing in his familiar warm scent, she feels her nerves slowly calm down. Just then a nurse opens the door and they both tense up but neither one breaks the embrace immediately.
"i'm sorry to interrupt, but we're ready for you" the young nurse looks away apologetically, but stands still at the door.
"i love you" she looks up with glassy eyes and takes his face in both hands. fighting every fibre of fear in his body he keeps his face neutral and closes the distance between them.
the kiss is not as short as a peck, and not as deep as a french. it's enough to get her blood rushing to her cheeks. it's warm and safe. it's familiar. it's him. he runs his fingers through her hair and pulls away before leaving one sweat lingering peck on her lips.
"i love you too"
•••
"am i late?" Jungkook walks in, his chest heaving. he immediately takes his coat off and turns to the others in the room "why is it so warm in here?"
"maybe it's the turtleneck" Hoseok points to his clothes as the younger sits down next to him fanning himself excessively "aaah, maybe"
He looks at Namjoon who's busy with his phone. brows furrowed, taking his index finger between his lips "where is Yoongi hyung?"
"he's inside" he replies only glancing at him, his attention fixed on his phone.
"like inside the surgery room?" Jungkook looks stunned, his lips shaped into an O. but the older doesn't seem to hear him, and he looks away feeling a little ignored.
"no, i don't thin-" Hoseok's reply is cut short as the door down the hall opens and Yoongi walks out.
His expression is unreadable as he tucks something away in his back pocket and mutters under his breath "he's small. he's so small"
they share uneasy glances and patiently wait for him to continue the corners of his mouth slowly curl up into a soft smile "but he's fine"
the room collectively lets out a sigh of relief before Hoseok drops his hands around Yoongi's shoulder and pulls him in tight.
"aaah hyung! i'm so happy for you"
He returns the hug firmly, his heart beating in his chest. pulling back he wipes his eyes as Namjoon pats him on the shoulder with a proud smile.
Yoongi looks at Jungkook who stands there contemplating how to react. he knows he's still in his head, going over what had happened and blaming himself so he gives him a reassuring nod, and the younger can't help but break into a smile and come forth. he wraps his hyung in a tight hug and Yoongi pats his back kindly.
"How is she?" Tren asks anxiously.
The two break the embrace and every head turns in Yoongi's direction.
"she's-" he trails off as two nervous looking nurses hurriedly run past him.
his head follows their movement as they go in through the same door he just came out of.
his heartbeat changes rhythm from ecstasy to anxiety.
he turns to the others their expressions just as confused as him. an eerie silence falls over them until Hoseok breaks it "it could be anyon-"
Yoongi cuts in "it's only her inside" and a look of fear washes over them all.
without a care he pushes the door open, and walks down the hall, nearing the surgery room he comes face to face with the doctor. she stands there, her gown soaking in fresh blood. she freezes in her place.
"Mr Min you are not allowed to be back here" she tells him through a steady tone but he can see the panic in her eyes.
"what's going on?" he asks, his pale face going translucent.
"you should go back" she points him in the direction but he can't take his wide eyes off of the glistening red stained outfit.
"I Said What's Going On?" he unconsciously yells, his loud voice brings Namjoon inside after him.
"Mr Min i-.." the doctor fumbles struggling to come up with the right words "our surgical team is doing everything they can right now...just please wait outside"
"what do you mean?" his voice leaves his mouth in a desperate whisper and his vision starts to get blurry.
the woman sighs heavily trying to center herself before speaking "she's loosing a lot of blood-"
"Then Stop It!!!" he shouts in her face and she flinches back bringing both hands up in defeat "we will do everything that we can...but i can't promise you anything" and without another word she slips back inside through the gliding doors.
he feels a sharp pain at the pit of his stomach. like he was just kicked in the gut. his lips trembling, and eyes blinking fast, he gives everything inside of him not to break down.
"yoongi?" he looks back startled, as Namjoon stares at him with a sad expression.
"this isn't fair" tears stream down his cheeks and anger clouds his thoughts.
"This isn't fucking fair!!!" he spits the words out and kicks the chair with all his might before his knees give out and he sits down next to it.
Namjoon crouches down in front of him but Yoongi covers his face in his hands and let's out a breathy sob.
"you gotta be strong hyung" he gives his shaking shoulders a firm squeeze "you gotta be strong for the three of you"
after a few moments he runs a hand down his face wiping his tears just for them to be replaced with new ones instantly. he helplessly looks in the direction of the door and has no idea what's gonna be the outcome, but he just knows it to his gut, that it's not anything good.
•••
the repetitive sound of quiet sniffing, pokes at his drowsy mind. he turns from one side to the other his eyes slowly fluttering open for a moment. at first he's taken aback by the sight of the small silhouette standing at the feet of the bed, so he quickly reaches out and turns the bedside lamp on.
"Yongsun? what are you doing out of bed?"
he looks at the three year old through squinting tired eyes. he's wearing a blue and white striped one piece pajama. clutching his stuffed purple whale to his chest he sniffs a couple more times and only then Yoongi sees the glistening tears down his face.
he takes the toddler's hand in his own and guides him to the empty side of the bed.
"did you have a bad dream again?" he asks as the boy rests his head on his outstretched arm, still holding onto his stuffed doll. he nods his head yes and Yoongi wraps his arm around him pulling the covers on them both.
"they're just dreams. the monsters are not here. see?" he gestures around the quiet room, dimly lit by the one lamp.
"what if...it's...there?" Yongsun points to the closet door, his quiet cries slowed down.
Yoongi gently wipes his small round cheeks with his big thumb and gives him a reassuring smile "then daddy will get them all"
"okay" his high pitched voice comes out as a soft whisper, melting Yoongi's heart. Yongsun gets out of his embrace, instead rests his head on top of his stomach and looks up with his big honey brown eyes "i want ice queen"
"it's late right now. you can have ice cream tomorrow" he says firmly but soothingly rubs his back. a few minutes pass in silence and once again Yoongi finds himself dozing off before the kid speaks again, this time completely waking him up.
"i want mommy"
Yoongi feels his heart skip a beat. lately they've been having this conversation on a weekly basis but still he struggles with explaining it. he's almost four and starting to observe things more curiously. he's been asking sharper questions and Yoongi answers them all often. but there's only so much a toddler can understand.
"i know. me too" he says looking at the framed photo on the bedside table. this constant longing he feels is almost unbearable at times, but he can't let it affect his son "you know mommy would be mad if she knew we're not sleeping!" his attempt at tricking him to sleep quickly backfires as he asks a follow up.
"hhhh! what does mad mommy do?" the boy gasps and he finds it undeniably cute.
"hmmm.." Yoongi thinks dramatically with a pout "..she would pinch your nose" he suddenly brings his hand up and gently pokes his small button nose.
"nooo" Yongsun covers his face and starts giggling, and Yoongi can't help himself but to join him.
he moves back up and wraps his short arms around his father's neck. resting their heads together he repeats himself "i want mommy"
it's not a surprising move from him, he's a loving and gentle child and sometimes the little things he does leave Yoongi overflowing with emotions.
the first year being just the two of them was really hard. Hoseok moved in for a while but Yoongi found it even harder to have someone there that was not her. so on his first birthday, he decided to hand over the company to a new team. he's still the owner but not the CEO. he produces from his home studio so he gets to spend most of his time with Yongsun. They visit Jinhae quite often and Nana helps out with him as much as she can.
But Yoongi believes nothing could ever come close to her.
against his better judgment, he hesitantly grabs his phone from the nightstand and checks the time. it's almost 2 am and he does some calculations before brushing the boy's soft black hair getting his attention.
"hey, you know what?" Yongsun looks up excitedly realization washing over his small face as he breaks into a heart warming gummy smile "let's go get some ice cream"