I wasn't sure what was going on. First, the kid stopped resetting, then I was left with Papyrus, then we ran out of food, then I was in the middle of dying, when two skeletons that looked somewhat like me take me to their house, and I wasn't dying anymore. My life couldn't get any weirder at this point. I had discovered that the two skeletons were named Nightmare and Killer; I guess names like mine were common around here. At the moment, we were eating some food; they had offered me some, and I couldn't exactly refuse. Papyrus was telling me how he knew it would be all right, but told me not to talk to him yet, as the other two couldn't see him. I guess that made sense; he was a ghost, after all. I had also noticed that my eyelights were colored again.
"So, why exactly were ya on the floor?" Killer asked.
"Killer, that's rude. At least try to be nice." Nightmare ordered.
"Sorry, Nightmare."
"Oh, I don't mind, really. Let's just say I had a few...problems." I replied, not wanting to worry anybody.
"You were in pretty bad shape. Did you get in a fight?" Nightmare wondered.
"No, I haven't fought anyone in a long time.."
"You're a Sans, aren'tcha? Why wasn't there a Papyrus in your AU? Usually when a Sans is hurt, the Papyrus is close by." Killer stated.
"Oh, Papyrus is with me!" I smiled. "He's just a ghost!"
"A ghost? What happened to him?"
"He died."
"Oh. So you can see his ghost?"
"Yup."
"Nightmare, does the possibility occur to you that this Sans is insane?"
"Killer, as far as I'm concerned, you're more insane. Apologize." Nightmare demanded.
"Sorry. Whatever."
"So, do you know what AU you're from?" Nightmare questioned.
"No? I wasn't aware they had names. I knew there were other universes, but I had no means of contact with them." I answered honestly.
"Ah, I see. I've never seen a Sans like you. Perhaps you're an original."
"I'm afraid I don't know what that means either."
"Well, in the multiverse, there are universes, and those universes can be copied. If I'm correct, you're from a universe that is not a copy of another in the common sense."
"Oh. So how did you find me, anyway?"
"Nightmare can sense negative feelings and stuff, and he said you were bein' really negative, so we went out to look for ya." Killer responded.
"That explains a lot."
"So what's your name? Or are ya just Sans?"
My name. My given name, or my original name. Neither felt like they belonged to me. Sans, my true name; he died a long time ago. Murder, my given name; every time I heard it, I was reminded of that kid. The name belonged to them; I just adopted it. It reminded me of my slingshot. All of the knives in the underground were theirs, but the slingshot was mine. I wanted a name that was mine. I wanted something that defined me, but what? For the past decade or so, I'd been alone, surrounded in...
"Dust. Call me Dust." I stated.
"Ya mean like, what we turn into when we die?" Killer wondered.
"Yeah."
"You're literally named Killer, Killer." Nightmare reminded.
"Noted..so, ya got any hobbies, Dust?" Killer asked.
"Not many." I replied. What was I supposed to say, killing all of my friends? Yeah, that would have gone over well; they'd probably have thrown me back into my universe and never come back.
"That's no fun. You ever killed anybody?"
"Killer, really, we just met him. Please refrain from those questions." Nightmare requested.
"Why do you ask? Have you ever killed anybody?" I looked at Killer confusedly.
"Yessiree, how I got my name! I killed everybody in my AU, as a matter of fact!" Killer stated proudly. I looked at him with a shocked face; I wasn't shocked at the fact he killed everybody. I was shocked that there was somebody else who killed everybody.
"Oh great. You scared him." Nightmare facepalmed.
"Oh, I'm not..scared." I stated.
"Really?" Killer looked a bit confused.
"Yeah..why exactly did you kill everybody?"
"I just..felt like it?"
"Huh. Not to get revenge or stop somebody? Just because you felt like it?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Didn't that ever get boring?"
"Borin'? Ya don't even know what borin' is. Borin' is livin' through thousands of resets with no change. When I finally got the chance to do something new, I took it! When killin' for no reason got old, I met Nightmare and joined his group, or whatever he's makin.'"
"Group?"
"I'm assembling a sort of gang to help me spread negativity across the multiverse. It gets a bit hard by myself." Nightmare responded. Hm..they did save my life; maybe I could help them with something.
"What does that entail?"
"Probably nothin' you're interested in. Most Sanses aren't really into makin' others feel bad unless it's a genocide run." Killer noted.
"So you just go around stealing candy from babies?"
"More like threatenin' their lives to scare 'em outta their wits."
"Why do you do that?"
"Well, Nightmare's part of some balance thingy and he has to do that in order to make sure the multiverse actually keeps negative emotions. If it didn't, everybody'd just be happy, like, all the time."
"So committing a wrong for a greater good?"
"Pretty much."
"I wouldn't mind that."
"Wait, really? Most people either run away or ask to leave before we get to that part."
"It's not really like I have anything else to do, and besides, you guys saved my life. It's the least I could do to repay you."
"So you want to join my gang? Can you even fight?" Nightmare questioned.
"I don't know. Depends on your definition of fighting, I guess."
"Our definition is beatin' 'em up until they can't feel anymore, but when we can, we still try to have fair combat. By fair, we mean not destroyin' somebody when they're incapable of fightin', beggin' for mercy, or when Nightmare tells us not to." Killer answered.
"That sounds right up my alley."
"Hm. I'll think about it, but you need to heal first; you were on the verge of dusting, you know." Nightmare said.
"Actually, I was nowhere near dusting."
"Whaddya mean? You were dyin'." Killer stated.
"I was dying; not dusting. When a monster dusts, they must have a type magic in their system when they die. If they have no magic, they produce no dust."
"How do you know that?" Nightmare wondered.
"I spent a lot of time doing research."
"So does that mean ya had no magic? How were you alive?" Killer asked.
"I have a small amount of determination that kept me alive. I don't know how I got it, but it isn't harmful."
"Interestin.' So what would've happened if ya died?"
"I would have left a body?"
"Oh. Should've expected that."
"So what exactly did you do in your AU? Generally speaking." Nightmare questioned.
"Depends on what period of time you're talking about. There's before the resets, during the early resets, during the late resets, during the super late resets, and after the resets."
"Whaddya mean after the resets? Ya mean they stopped?" Killer asked.
"Yeah; they stopped."
"Interesting. I'm assuming before the resets is average life. What about the early ones?" Nightmare questioned.
"Early resets. I was named Sans, I had my brother, kid walked through Underground and picked a route to go on. It was mostly genocide."
"What about the late ones?"
"Total genocide; no neutrals, no pacifists."
"That musta sucked. How about the super late ones?" Killer wondered.
"I uh...that's a bit hard to explain..I just sort of...snapped."
"What do you mean by snapped?" Nightmare asked.
"I started..killing every living being in the underground..just to stop the kid."
"Oh...oh my...you did that every reset?"
"Yep: all the way until the end."
"What stopped the resets?"
"The kid decided to stay dead just to torture me. They were very..clever."
"So you were alone?" Killer questioned.
"Not fully: I had Papyrus. I still do; he's floating around your head."
"That's not creepy at all..."
"What did you do when they stopped?" Nightmare wondered.
"Not much.." I replied, not wanting to worry anybody.
"How long were you alone, then?" Nightmare asked.
"Huh. Papyrus, how long was it?" I asked.
"One decade, one year, eight months, two weeks, five days, eleven hours, twenty-one minutes exactly." Papyrus stated.
"Hm.." I didn't want them to worry about me. "Longer than I would have liked."
"Well, I think that's enough for now; you should get some rest. Come along, Killer." Nightmare signaled for them to leave.
Now it was only me and Papyrus.
"You did a good job answering questions, brother!" Papyrus complimented.
"You would have done better, Paps. I still don't know why you made me answer all of them..." I returned.
"Don't sell yourself short, brother. Why did you change your name, though?"
"It just..felt right."
"All right; I told you everything would be fine, brother!"
"Heh..you really did, Paps."
"So you are going to join these helpful strangers?"
"Yeah. I owe them my life."
"You have never made a commitment like this, except your choice to extinguish the human."
"I know, Paps."
"Very well. I shall abide by your choice."
"Thanks, bro. You're the best."
"I know; I am the Great Papyrus, after all!"
"Heh..yeah, you are."
"So, what do we do next?"
"Can you find out what you can about this place? I'm a bit..bedridden at the moment."
"Of course, brother! I shall map the entire building so you will never lose your way!"
"Thanks, Paps. You really are the best."
After I said that, Paps left the room, and I was alone. This was a different alone, though; I liked it. Even though I couldn't see anybody, I knew there was somebody out there, which made it different from knowing only the dust of people who would be there if I hadn't killed them would be waiting. I didn't know what this feeling was, but I felt comforted by it; almost as if I was really free. I felt happy. I felt...calm; I didn't know the last time I actually felt calm. I could actually relax now; the shaking had been brought down to a minimum, and the pain was minute. I believed I might have had some permanent damage done, though; that remained to be seen. For now, I would sleep.
I descended into another nightmare, which I had expected at this point. Dust was floating, as usual, and I could hear and feel the misery and pain I inficted; it didn't bother me. I didn't know how I wasn't bothered by it, but I wasn't, and I couldn't help it. I guess when you'd endured something for so long, you just grew numb to it. Pleads did nothing. There was no mercy. I didn't remember the last time I used mercy; I didn't remember the last time anybody I encountered used mercy. I didn't remember what mercy felt like. What was mercy? Was mercy simply not killing, or was it something more? Fighting and acting were not included in mercy; only sparing and fleeing. Why was mercy so general? Was it supposed to be that way? You could be more friendly with acting than you could with mercy; what about mercy killing; like a horse with a broken leg? Was that not included in mercy? Why did they plead for mercy when it was indifferent? You could despise somebody and use mercy on them, or you could love somebody and fight them, so what was mercy? Did it even matter if mercy existed in a world where it wasn't going to be used? Asgore used to break the mercy button; he could still be befriended. Why did the others need mercy to become friends? I never listened to mercy. Why did they? Was it mere thought? I didn't understand.
Too many thoughts were swirling around my head; I needed to sleep. Wait, was I not already asleep? I was asleep; I didn't even realize that I was asleep. Perhaps now I would think of the future. Yes, the future was pleasant to think about, especially when you could think about anything. In the next week, I could have died, I could have lived, I could have gone to space, I could have done anything. Anything was possible; if the resets could stop, anything was possible. Yes, anything I dreamed about could have come to fruition, and anything I wished could have come true; the only thing not to do was expect. Never expect what you dream about; if you expect it, it may never come. If you expect anything and everything, you cannot be wrong. I didn't want to be wrong, so I expected everything. The only way I could have been wrong was if nothing happened, at which point, I would cease to exist, and the future would not matter anymore. I expected everything, in hopes of never being wrong.
I expected everything, so I was never disappointed.
~~~chapter end woot~~~
Aye Murder bean has transformed into Dust bean!
Thanks for reading my questionable writing!
Bye!