The roaring in his ears helped distract Buford from the distinct feeling of oppression and powerlessness. When he was on his motorbike, he felt free. He felt like all he had to do was just stay on and everything would work out fine. He knew, deep down, that life just didn't work that way. But it was a temporary relief and he'd take it any day. It was around ten at night and the streets of Danville were empty, silent except for the deep rumbling of his bike as he finally parked it up in front of the Flynn-Fletcher household.
Taking off his helmet, Buford glanced up at the second story windows, half expecting to see one of the brothers up there, waving at him. The windows were dark, however, and Buford let out a puff of air, watching it mist in the cool night air. He was wondering whether he should knock. It had only been around ten minutes since he'd sent the text that had sealed his fate, and Ferb had simply replied, Come over, bring your bike. We'll go for a ride.
He knew he'd be able to rely on Ferb to listen to his problems. The main thing was, Buford was still unsure how much he was going to reveal. Part of him still recoiled at telling anything, but it was simply too much to bear on his own. Even the tiniest part of his worries shared would take a weight off his shoulders. Recently, he'd begun to feel like Atlas.
He caught a glimpse of movement at the front door and saw Ferb exiting. He shouted a hello and Ferb waved in response. There was muffled yelling from inside the house and Ferb turned back to shout, "Mum said I'm fine to go out! Leave off, Candace!"
An amused smirk twisted Buford's lips as Ferb made his way to the garage and walked his own motorbike out. The two of them had, years ago, expressed a desire to get their own bikes. No one else in the group had wanted to, so Buford and Ferb worked together to come up with the money to get them. Those experiences had been what caused them to become closer friends. Ferb ended up tinkling with both bikes and making them better. They hadn't been able to drive them until they got their licences, but once they had, they'd gone out on rides together constantly. Eventually they settled down and only went out occasionally, but it was still something they shared, something that connected them.
Ferb stopped his bike beside Buford's and hopped on. There was a loud screech from inside and both boys ducked as a spoon was thrown out the window towards them. It clattered harmlessly to the ground behind them and Ferb's mouth thinned. "Let's go before she starts throwing knives. Damn hormones."
They both walked the bikes to the road and Ferb glanced over at Buford before they pulled their helmets on. "Been a while since we've been on these babies together," he said, staring pointedly at the other boy.
"I have a boyfriend," Buford countered, giving a small grin. "You have no idea how much of your time they eat up."
Ferb only laughed before pulling on his helmet and riding off. Buford followed suit. He wasn't paying much attention to where they were going, he knew Ferb had a destination in mind and wasn't too worried about what that was. He was just relieved to be able to act like things were normal again. The last time they'd ridden together had been before all of this mission business, and he allowed himself to pretend he was back in that moment, without all this worry.
But then, a niggling thought reminded him, he wouldn't have been able to realize his feelings for Baljeet. That had to count for something, didn't it? He wasn't sure if it made up for the rest of the shit he'd had to put up with, but at least there was something good about all this.
Pulling himself from his thoughts, Buford finally managed to pay attention to the road they were travelling on. He recognized it immediately. They were already on their way out of Danville and were heading towards the small beach town Eurgh, where Ferb and Buford always used to go when they rode their bikes together. The wind was whistling inside his helmet, and it helped calm him, although it start to make his head hurt after a while.
They both pulled up outside an old diner, the only building within miles still open at that time of night. Ferb was the first to climb off and he entered the diner, Buford following close behind. The interior was brightly lit, with a counter on one side and tables on the other. There were bar stools so people could sit at the counter, but the boys headed over to a table in the corner. A few moments later and they were approached by a familiar old man.
Knobblies, as the man liked to be called, had a fat stomach with a handlebar mustache that moved when he talked. He had a pair of sunglasses on despite the time of day, an oddity that Buford had often joked about. He was sure they were glued to the man's face. "Ferb! Buford! Long time no see!" Knobblies greeted, pulling out a little notebook and a pen. "What would you boys like?"
"Two coffees?" Ferb suggested, and Buford nodded his agreement. "Two coffees, thanks, Knobblies."
The man nodded and gave them a huge grin, writing the rather short order down in his notebook before heading off towards the kitchen. Knobblies was a weird name, but both boys knew the man preferred the wacky nickname to his actual name. Apparently his mother had been intent on having a girl and even when he came out a boy, she still insisted on calling him Kelsey. Apparently he'd demanded to be called by his nickname since he was a young boy.
The coffees were brought out in short order and Knobblies retreated back behind the counter, leaving Ferb and Buford to themselves. The boys sipped at their steaming drinks for a few moments before the smaller of the two finally put down his cup and fixed the other with a penetrating stare. "So, care to share?"
Buford gulped, knowing the time had come. He put his own cup down and shifted uncomfortably, trying his best to avoid eye contact. "Well, I did say we had to talk."
"So let me guess," Ferb started casually, stirring his coffee without much thought. "This is about your fake relationship with Baljeet?"
"Yeah," Buford let out a sigh and leaned back. A second later and Ferb's words clicked in his head and his eyes widened, body going tense. "Wait... what!"
"Oh come off it, Buford," the other teen rolled his eyes in exasperation. "I'm not that stupid."
The bully sat there awkwardly for a few moments, not quite knowing what to say. One last surge of resistance hit him and he found himself telling yet another lie. "Well, actually, it's not about me. I have this friend..."
"A friend, huh?" Ferb's lips twitched.
"Yeah, and they need help."
"Your 'friend' needs help?" the boy repeated, the twitch forming an amused grin.
"See, he has this secret that no one, not even me, is supposed to know about. And it's kinda huge," Buford rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.
"How do you know about this if you don't even know about it?" Ferb raised one green eyebrow, clearly confused.
"I, uh, found their diary," Buford lied, sweat forming on his brow. Had he really come all this way to just lie through his teeth?
"Where'd you find it?"
"It was in their man purse," he muttered, and he could almost feel himself digging a deeper hole.
"Oh?" a smirk formed on the green-haired teen's lips. "You have a man purse, you know."
"It's a satchel!" the bully hissed, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment.
Ferb rolled his eyes, the smirk dropping in place of a glare. "Cut the crap, Buford. What the fuck is going on?"
Buford let out a sigh and rested his chin on his hand, staring down at the table, coffee forgotten. It was now or never. He had to tell. "Okay, look, something happened that I can't tell you about because it's just too personal," he started. Ferb only nodded. The bully knew the smaller teen would understand and respect that. His crush on Phineas was, after all, too personal for anyone to know about. The only reason Buford knew is because he'd figured it out himself. "And I was talking about what happened to someone over the phone, and this asshole overheard me. This thing that happened... I just... I can't let anyone else find out about it. I can't imagine how people would react. I can't face that. I just can't."
Ferb nodded once, gesturing for Buford to continue.
"And this asshole knew I didn't want anyone to find out, so now he's blackmailing me with it."
"What's he getting you to do?" the other teen asked, his tone neutral.
"He told me he'd spill everything unless I got Baljeet to fall in love with me, and when that happens, I'm supposed to break his heart," Buford covered his eyes.
"What the hell did Baljeet do to this 'asshole'?"
Buford realised that he'd never even bothered to ask. Why did Chris hate the boy so much? As far as he knew, the two of them had never spoken. Had something happened that Buford was unaware of? He made a mental note to ask Chris about it eventually. Maybe he'd get some answers. Maybe those answers could help him in some way. "I don't know, Ferb," the bully said eventually. "But he wants to hurt Baljeet, and he's using the brat's feelings for me to do so."
Ferb nodded, his face impassive. He seemed to be taking everything on in a non-judgmental way, but then again, Ferb had always been hard to read. He could be preparing an angry rant for all Buford knew.
"I agreed to go through with it," guilt stabbed him once again. "I thought I had no choice. I honestly just hate myself so much. And then when we went on dates I'd both enjoy them and hate them at the same time. I just got so confused and fucking sick of everything. And then today..."
He hesitated. Ferb raised one eyebrow. "Go on."
"When we were dancing. Do you remember Phineas interrupting us, telling us to tone down on the PDA?" Buford asked.
"Vaguely, yes."
"Well, I'm pretty sure Baljeet was just about to declare his love for me," Buford scrunched up his nose at that. As much as he liked the other kid, declarations of love would always make him cringe. They were just so girly. "He was literally in the middle of saying it when Phineas interrupted. Chris overheard, and he's going to make me finish the mission soon. I just don't know what to do."
"Chris, huh?" Ferb leaned back. "I had an inkling he was involved with you somehow, but not to this extent. Makes sense, he's the biggest asshole in the school."
Buford shook his head at Ferb. That boy seemed to know everything. Maybe it was because he was British. Or smart. Personally, Buford thought it was just because of the British thing.
"I'm not sure how he wants me to do it yet," he began to imagine ways he'd have to finish the mission and a feeling of powerlessness crept up on him. He felt tears stinging his eyes and he tried to force them back, but was unable to hide a sniff. "But I'm pretty sure he's going to get me to do it harshly. And publicly."
Ferb reached over the table and patted Buford's hand awkwardly. "You can cry."
"I know," the touch and the words both made it so much harder for him to hold back, and his whole body tensed as he fought away the tears.
"You really like him, don't you?" Ferb's smile held no mirth or happiness. It was more bitter than anything else.
"I can't do it, Ferb," Buford closed his eyes, struggling with himself. "I can't. I don't know what to do."
Ferb stayed quiet for a while, his face contemplative as he waited for Buford to get a hold of himself. After a few moments the bully had calmed enough that he was no longer in danger of crying, and Ferb spoke. "What do you think you can do?"
There was a snort of derision, and Buford forced a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "I dunno, Ferb. I think I'm screwed."
They both went quiet, mulling over the situation in their minds. Buford was watching Ferb intently, hoping to see sparks of an idea forming, anything that might mean the teen had thought up a way to help him. But there was nothing, and for once Buford started to think that Ferb couldn't help him.
Or maybe he just wouldn't. It was, after all, a very delicate and tricky situation. Plus, he knew that the green-haired teen stayed out of any kind of romantic problems. They were too personal. And besides, just listening with an open mind had helped considerably. Maybe that would be enough.
Buford would have to come up with a way to work everything out on his own.
Buford was awoken rather rudely by his mother opening his door non too gently and thrusting the phone into his hand. He closed his eyes against the light searing his eyeballs from his mother opening his curtains and pressed the device to his ear. "Hello?" he asked groggily, still exhausted from his late night out with Ferb. The two of them had spent a while just sitting in silence at the diner, and then they'd gone for an extremely long ride. Thus, Buford had gotten home late and hadn't gotten much sleep. He was in no mood for school.
"Buford!" Baljeet's smooth and still rather high voice greeted him. "What happened yesterday? I was worried."
"Uhh," the bully pushed himself into a sitting position, hoping it would help wake him up fully so he could participate in the conversation properly. "Something came up, sorry. I ended up just hanging with Ferb for a while."
"Oh," there was a long pause before the other boy cleared his throat. "Okay, that is fine. I was just wondering. I will see you at your mailbox in twenty minutes?"
"Sure, 'Jeet," Buford grumbled. They said their goodbyes and hung up. Despite his grogginess, he still managed to notice his increased heartbeat. It was the first time they'd spoken since he'd come to the conclusion that he had feelings for the foreign brat. It still felt weird for him.
He dragged himself down stairs and into the kitchen. His mother promptly shoved a warm coffee mug filled with the delicious smelling liquid into his hand, along with some energy pills she kept around whenever she had late nights. "Take those and then get in the shower," she winked at him before bustling off into her room. He popped the pills into his mouth and then took a swallow of his coffee, sighing in satisfaction once he was done. His mother truly made the best coffee.
It didn't take him long to down the rest of the mug, and he put it on the counter before shuffling up the stairs to his bathroom, feeling a bit more awake. He awoke completely when he stepped into the shower before it had warmed properly and ended up covered in goosebumps. His mother shouted goodbye up to him from downstairs, and he knew she was off to work. He returned to farewell, trying not to get soap in his eyes. Eventually, he made it through the shower and got himself properly dressed.
Once downstairs again, he found his bag sitting on the table, along with his lunch and a can of energy drink. Smiling at his mother's thoughtfulness, he put both in his bag before spying a little note hidden under his lunch bag. Have a good day, sweetie, it read. I'll see you when you finish school! I love you!
The note brought a twitch of a smile to his face and he carefully folded it and slipped it into his pocket before pulling his bag on. He stretched as he left the house, making sure to lock up behind him before he strode over to his mailbox to wait for his boyfriend. Sure enough, less than a minute later, he caught sight of the boy hurrying towards him with his usual overflowing bag.
"Good morning," he said breathlessly, looking puffed from the awkward fast-walk/slow-run he'd done.
"Mornin', geek," Buford smirked, hooking his hand under the shoulder strap of the boy's bag and lifting it away. "Here, let me carry that."
"Thank you," Baljeet beamed, causing the bully's cheeks to go a bit red. He should have been used to their interactions by now, but there was a new twist to the relationship. Buford actually liked Baljeet back now. This new revelation made the larger boy feel like he was back at square one. He wasn't entirely sure how to act around his boyfriend now.
Sometime during their walk to school, however, he loosened up and relaxed a little. This was just Baljeet, after all. They'd been friends for years. If he couldn't act at least semi-normally around him, then something was seriously wrong.
"Are you excited for the play?" Baljeet asked cheerfully, carrying a few of his books pressed to his chest. Buford was walking beside him, carrying both his bag (which probably contained two exercise books, his lunch, and a couple of pens) and the runt's bag (which weighed more than a large dog and he had no idea how the smaller boy had managed to carry it for so long).
"Oh sure," he replied in a flat voice. "Two more days until I get to make a complete fool of myself on stage in front of the whole school and everyone's parents. I can't wait."
"What are you talking about?" the other boy frowned up at him. "You are an excellent performer. You should have no trouble."
"It's not my acting skills I'm worried about," Buford sighed. "It's the fact I have to wear a dress. A freakin' dress. Have you seen the costume Candace made for me? It's this horrid pink colour and it's all frilly. I'll look like a total dork."
"Well," a hint of a smirk twisted Baljeet's lips. "At least you will not be alone. Phineas and Ferb also have to wear dresses. As does Chris Fraser. You know him, do you not? He is the blond boy. I think he was on your football team."
He felt like someone had punched him in the stomach, hearing that name leave Baljeet's lips. Ice cold dread made its way through his veins, leaving him shaken and unhappy. "I-I know him," he forced out, trying to sound normal. "But we haven't spoken much."
He paused, and then remembered his mental note from last night to find out why Chris hated Baljeet so much. Maybe the smaller boy knew why, and could tell him. He took a breath and asked, "have you ever spoken to him?"
"Once," the Indian winced and glanced away. "He threw an insult at me and said it wrong. I corrected him and he got very angry. It was stupid of me, really, to wind him up."
Buford blinked a couple of times. "He didn't... hurt you or anything, did he?"
"No, no," the other boy suddenly smiled up at him. "He knows you are my bully."
"Not really a bully anymore, am I, 'Jeet?" the boy grunted. So that was why Chris hated Baljeet. What a completely pathetic and psychotic reason. But really, had he expected anything different?
Baljeet laughed. "No, you are not."
Not really in the mood to talk anymore, Buford started to reply in grunts until the other boy took the hint and they fell into a comfortable silence. The rest of the way to school was almost relaxing until Buford caught sight of Chris standing next to the school sign, puffing on a cigarette like he did every morning before class.
Their eyes made contact for a brief second and, slowly, a smirk formed on the blond's face.
Oh boy. This was going to be a rough day.