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YEJI
"You can't go," Ningning screamed at me.
"I have to," I replied softly.
I had no energy left in me. No fight either. The tears had deserted me hours ago and the pain too. Or maybe I was in so much pain that I couldn't feel anything anymore.
I was at the hospital, in a gown, ready to pop out the needle of the IV out of my arm but one of the girls put her hand on my arm before I could. I looked up to meet Ryujin's eyes and her, oh so, permanent expression of disgust.
"Please, don't get it out. It's gross ,"
"Yeah that and it's for her well being too," Ningning added but Ryujin didn't really care about that, did she? She just didn't like the sight of blood. Quite ironic for such a violent person.
I stared at her, I didn't care what would happen to me anymore. I could defy her.
I tried to catch the needle but she was stronger. My arm wasn't moving an inch and I stretched my fingers trying to get hold of the IV as we kept defiantly staring at one another. The tension was high but it quickly faded away when with her other hand she slapped my head.
"Stop," she said, mouth clenched.
"Ow," I stopped, immediately rubbing the spot that she slapped.
Suddenly, the door opened revealing a nurse followed by my parents. Oh, shit. That's it. I'm dead. There was no way to hide though...so I might as well face it. Also, what could they do to me now that will be worse than my current suffering?
They looked around the room, before even looking at me, surprised by the number of people in it.
"Who are you?" my mother raised an eyebrow at the girls.
"Her friends, ma'am," Ningning smiled hesitantly. Clearly intimidated by them. The other girls looked at her as if to say 'no, we're not really' but didn't say it out loud.
My parents exchanged a look of disbelief before their eyes fell on me but I didn't feel belittled this time. All of my worries were gone. All my will. I didn't meet their eyes knowing all too well what I would find in them. I stared ahead. The nice nurse took a look at the IV, she smiled at me but even with all my will, I couldn't return it. I had lost the ability to smile the last time I had seen Lia. The nurse delicately touched my shoulder, pushing me back in bed.
"You need to rest, Young Lady," her voice was warm, honey-like. Delicate and sweet to the ear. The kind of voice you want to listen all day long or would want to narrate you a book even. Warm as a summer day when the sun touches softly your skin and the breeze make the trees sing. The warm breath of Lia on my neck on these days, back at the treehouse.
"Yeji?"
I opened my eyes reluctantly. My parents' faces were the first thing I saw and the warmth disappeared.
"Yeji, what happened?" my father asked firmly.
The four girls were at the back of the room and a little warmth came back at the thought of not being alone. They may not be my friends but they were still here. They could have let me unconscious in that street, hell, even beat me up back in that classroom but they were here.
Ningning looked so anxious. Looking in between my parents, her eyebrows slightly furrowed. Chaeryeong and Yuna waited in anticipation too and Ryujin...ah Ryujin... she was sat on a chair, her legs spread open and a little flame in her eyes. A flame of desire, of violence. It was all a game for her. I kind of envied it a bit, being able to don't care at all but at the same time, this kind of behavior hid a profound suffering. A problem that she'll never get rid off if she'll not face it. I didn't envy that. I faced mine already. I was able to live with myself now but others became the problem. Like the ones standing next to my bed.
I looked in between my mother and my father. Did they ever love me? Did it really change when I was forced to come out? Or was it always like that but more bearable?
"Yeji, answer me,"
"Kill me."
The girls gasped, so did the nurse, I didn't see my parents reactions so I looked up to my father who had asked the question. He seemed confused and maybe a little embarrassed because of the audience who was present.
He seemed confused. I wasn't.
"Kill me or let me die," I repeated. I was surprised by the lack of emotions in my voice. It felt even more as if I was dead inside.
"What are you talking about?" my mother scoffed in disbelief.
"There's nothing good in this world anymore," I turned toward her " Get me out of here and let me die or kill me yourself,"
"NO!" Ningning came forward, crystal tears escaping her eyes " You have to keep fighting. It's gonna get better. We'll find a solution,"
" You're sweet, Ningning but...I fought enough. I don't want to anymore. Lia will be better without me. Tell her..." I looked at each of the girls to assure that my words will be heard. "Tell her that she was the best thing that ever happened to me."
"Who's Lia?" my mother asked but I ignored her.
"Tell her to live a beautiful happy life like the ones we imagined at the treehouse ,"
"No...no," Ningning kept shaking her head whimpering.
"Stop this nonsense." my father raised his voice.
Ningning sprinted to me, pushing my father away a bit- his scandalous face would have been comically hilarious under any other circumstances- she put her arms around me, her forehead touching the side of mine.
"Please, don't...you're my friend."
I put my hand on her arm in comfort. It was my turn to be in tears.
Chaeryeong's phone rang out of nowhere.
" Sorry." she apologized, answering it quickly.
After a few seconds, her face showed confusion and worry "No, she isn't with us. We're at the hospital. Ok, ma'am." she hung up, looking back at us without really believing what she just heard.
"It's was Lia's mom....Lia ran away,"
My heart stopped beating. My emotions were a mix of happiness and worry. Happy that she managed to escape and that she was safe but that's what scared me too. Lia alone in town.
Ryujin laughed, pulling me out of my thoughts and gained everyone's attention.
"How did they managed to lose her?.... She has a fucking limp,"