BONDING
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After a couple of minutes, Mrs Weasley interrupted the silence;
"Boys, are you staying the night?"
"Yeah, tomorrow we will spend the first night at the flat. There're some things that aren't ready yet but we wanna be there before opening the shop," George spoke, while Fred stood up from next to me to walk next to his twin.
The ginger woman nodded, looking not completely pleased with the answer she got. Everyone knew Molly Weasley didn't exactly support the twins' decision of owning a joke shop. Even though I personally thought it was a great idea.
A whole hour later, the twins announced they needed to sleep and their parents followed them shortly after, asking if Remus and I were okay and offering us the empty rooms in the house. I declined kindly since even though I was extremely tired, Remus wasn't planning to sleep anytime soon and I wasn't going to let him by his own.
"Lilith, why don't you go to sleep, my dear?" he insisted, but I quickly shook my head. Remus let out a long and heavy sigh. "Fine, then, mind coming with me out? I need a bit of fresh air."
We opened the door silently, making sure all the lights were off so we didn't bother anyone, and sat on the porch, close to each other to keep the little heat around us. The dim moonlight covered us under a starry night, Remus couldn't help but stare at it with despise and tears in his eyes. I let my head rest on his shoulder and he patted my knee.
"Thank you for all the support you are showing me," he sincerely spoke, giving me a little smile I corresponded.
"There's nothing to thank me for, Remus. You would've done the same for me."
A very short silence installed between us. It wasn't uncomfortable at all, but it felt heavy since it was early in the night. Probably just a few hours left from sunrise.
"Lilith, can I ask you a question?"
"Go on."
"Did you see Circe up there as your Boggart?" Remus asked, watching carefully my reaction.
"I did. It was terrible." The memory of my mother holding her wand against Fred's neck made me feel sick and full of sorrow. The fear in his brown eyes and how he murmured the word 'darling' was deeply trapped under my skin and all I wanted was to run inside, go upstairs and kiss the ginger boy with all the love I felt for him.
"But you didn't only see that, did you?"
My heart raced and I raised my head from the man's shoulder. "How do you know?"
"Molly's reaction. She's known for a while Circe's your Boggart but never until now treated you properly. You had to see something that actually shocked her. Otherwise..."
The thought about confessing Remus my feelings for Fred rambled in my mind. It was admitting it out loud to someone who wasn't Liv nor Hermione, the ones who saw the revelation moment, but also it was Remus, one of the only few people I would have trusted with my own life. The person who always stood up for me and protected me every time he could and one of the first people to find out about my encounters with the ginger.
"I didn't." I finally let out. "I saw Circe killing Fred Weasley. Mrs Weasley saw it, that's why she was being so considerate with me."
Remus's eyes opened widely but he managed to recover from the surprise and to pass his arm around my shoulder. I wasn't going to cry, I already did it upstairs in front of the false corpse and Molly had to see me in such a low moment, I couldn't allow myself to breakdown for a Boggart in front of Remus who just a few hours ago actually lost someone as important for him like Sirius was.
"Oh, Lilith..."
"I think I'm in love with him, Remus," I whispered, calmly. "No, I know I love him." I sniffed a bit because of the cold air. "My Patronus has changed, it isn't a German Sheppard anymore, it is a magpie. Just like his."
"Dear, that's... the purest show of love someone could ever have by far. I'd lie if I say this caught me completely by surprise because it didn't. Unbelievable how it seems, I've started to know you too well and you look at him in such a familiar way that I know it's unmistakable."
I sighed hard, playing with my nails. "I haven't confessed it to him, though."
"Well, I can't tell you anything about him because even though the twins seem to behave like an open book, they truly don't. But, from my experience, hiding your feelings for someone who you're close to only works to waste time."
"I don't know. I don't think I'm ready yet. It scares me to- "I breathed deeply. " To think that he might not feel the same for me. And, what do I expect if he actually does — which I really doubt —? To start a relationship in the middle of a magic war knowing that I might confront my mother and not live to tell the tale? Or to live constantly with the fear of him abandoning me? Nah, I'm not ready. Besides, if I do survive the war, I want to focus on therapy. I can't keep living with this fucking trauma."
"And that's completely valid, dear. It doesn't matter what I can advise you or not, your feelings are only and completely yours to deal with them and to choose with who you share them."
I rested my head again on Remus's shoulder and interlaced my arm with his. Opening myself to the only adult figure I felt truly safe and comfortable with, was like having a little taste of what I would have felt if I had had a caring father who actually stayed with me, and I knew I'll never be thankful enough for having Remus Lupin in my life.
We stayed there for the rest of the night, watching the sunrise, chatting in a low voice and supporting each other. I can't exactly remember when we fell asleep in that exact position but, by the time I felt someone's hand on my shoulder waking me up, the sun was up in the almost clear sky. Summer had clearly arrived in South England.
"Morning, beautiful." Fred crooned funnily ironic as he was sitting on his heels, looking at me with his shiny brown eyes, a mischievous smile and the sun brightening back in his ginger hair, being a little bit messed up by the morning wind.
I raised my head from Remus's shoulder, who was still asleep against the woody handrail of the porch.
"Morning..." I replied with a sleepy and hoarse voice, rubbing my eyes to wake me up properly. "What time is it?"
"Nine in the morning, more or less," his smile grew on his face. "I know the Burrow isn't pretty big but, you do know we have beds inside, right? You don't need to sleep on the stairs."
I snorted, putting a hand in front of my face to avoid the sunlight hitting me straight in it. "Oh, shut up, the Burrow is perfect. Remus wanted to get a bit of fresh air and we ended up falling asleep."
"Well, then you should get your pretty face inside before the Order arrives with Ron and Ginny and think we have kicked you two out of the house. Also, Remus gotta go to King's Cross to look after Harry."
"Did something else happen to him?" I asked a bit worried.
"Nah, I heard something about his muggle family and the Order wanting to make sure they treat him properly. I've seen them before and if all muggles are like the Dursleys, then I want them all far away from me. Weird as fuck that people."
I snickered a little bit. "Yeah, I bet you aren't used to the muggle world, are you, Freddie?"
His eyebrows raised playfully. "Are you, Lilith?"
"Bet."
"Oh, right, I forgot you do fancy the muggle world, don't you?" he chuckled, giving up. "Wake up Remus before he misses Harry, and get inside, mum's making coffee."
He entered the house leaving the door opened and I carefully woke up Remus. He opened his eyes suddenly, a bit scared and held to the handrail.
"What the fuck-" he mumbled, a bit shocked. "Oh, Lilith, cheers. What am I doing here?"
"We fell asleep at some point during dusk."
"Oh, bollocks, that's why my back hurts so much. I'm too old for this shit." Just-woke-up Remus turned out to be funnier than what I expected. He stood up slowly, with complaining noises as he touched his back. "Fuck! I forgot I've gotta see Harry at King's Cross."
I stood up with a little smile on my face as I observed Remus panicking a little bit.
"Remus, for God's sake!" Molly Weasley appeared at the door with her hands on her hips. Lupin quickly brushed his messy hair. "Kingsley is waiting for you at the station!- Hang on, did you two sleep in here the whole night?!"
"Yes, but don't worry, Mrs Weasley, we're fine."
"Lilith, I need to go now, but I'll be picking you up for taking you to my apartment tomorrow in the morning, ok? Need to prepare some things before you arrive in there."
"If the Weasleys don't mind, then, it's completely fine."
"Of course I don't mind, dear. You can stay here as much as you want," the ginger woman spoke with a soft voice.
Remus looked at me with a smile on his face, still surprised at Molly's new behaviour.
"Thank you so much, Mrs Weasley. But, Remus, you don't need to bother yourself so much, I will only be staying for a week until Liv and I can move to the new flat."
"It doesn't matter how much time, you'll be my guest and I want you to be as comfortable as possible."
I hugged him tightly and finally let him go through the Weasleys' chimney with Floo Powder.
"Come here, dear. You fancy some coffee?" Mrs Weasley smiled at me before her twins' and husband's surprised looks. I nodded a bit shy and George quickly patted the seat next to him, which apparently, was usually Ginny's. "Your uncle has made your trunk arrive. It has a Capacious Extremis spell."
The woman put a mug with hot and steamy coffee in front of me, a cristal bottle of milk and sugar.
"Thank you, Mrs Weasley," I smiled at her while putting three teaspoons of sugar on the black coffee and giving the first sip. Perfect.
"You drink your coffee like that?" George asked, genuinely surprised.
"I do." I grinned at him. "And my tea with no sugar and just a little sip of milk."
"That's exactly how you're supposed to drink it. Cheers, Lilith." Mr Weasley said with a sweet tone and I smiled at him, a bit surprised and confused since this was probably the first time Arthur Weasley ever spoke to me.
"Forgive my husband, dear. He's extremely British," Molly sat next to him, with a mug for herself and grinning mischievously, reminding me to her sons, at Arthur.
"Oh, wait, you are Irish, right, Mrs Weasley?"
She nodded. "And proud. I even tried to teach my kids how to speak Gaeilge but it was useless, only Ginny and Bill know how to do it properly."
"We understand it, though," George added, taking a bite from his toast.
"Yeah, Georgie and I are so used to having you telling us off in it that we're basically fluent by now."
"Oh, don't be so dramatic! You two know I have to be really angry to be telling you off in Gaeilge. What is Lilith going to think of me?!"
I couldn't help but snicker when I saw the twins opening their eyes widely at the same time as they looked at their mother, confused.
"Mum... are you feeling good?" Fred asked.
"Yes, dear, why?"
The boys looked at each other and shrugged.
"Lilith, would you like us showing you the house once we finish breakfast?" George suggested, while his twin had his eyes on me and a little smile on his face.
"Sure, but I'll help your mother first."
"Oh, no! You are a guest in here, there's no need for you to help me."
Before I could refuse to, Fred and George stood up at the same time and grabbed each of my hands to drag me with them. They showed me every place in the house and it turned out to be as beautiful and cosy as I perceived it the first time. Even though it was a bit small for the seven of them, it felt so homely and warm that the last time I felt so comfortable in someone's house was at the Lovegood's.
The tour ended in the twins' room which happened to be a bit bigger than the other ones since they had to share it. Already from outside of it and with the door closed, the smell of powder and fresh shampoo could be noticed. They opened the door and let me get inside first to examine it and to admire it while they stayed leaning at the door's frame. The views from the window were stunning and the number of prank items and Quidditch posters they owned really surprised me.
"It's really cool, boys."
"Bah, it's not that much."
"It's perfect. I really like it." I slightly scowled. I didn't like them discrediting the beautiful place they actually had. I touched a telescope in front of me, over their desk, but quickly took my hand off it when George hissed.
"I wouldn't touch that if I were you, Lilith. It'd punch you."
I couldn't help but giggle. Of fucking course, it had to be a prank of them. "How am I even surprised?"
"As if you didn't know us by now, darling." Fred winked at me.
"GEORGE! COME 'ERE A MINUTE!" Mrs Weasley's voice sounded all over the house, scaring the living fuck out of me. George rolled his eyes;
"Going, mum!" he replied while going downstairs, leaving Fred and me alone. Alone for the first time in more than a month.
He smirked mischievously and entered fully the room, slowly, closing the door behind him. Fred sat on his bed, stretching and spreading his long legs, still staring at me.
"You know? It's a bit weird to have you in here." Fred started, drawling, and with a soft tone. "But I think I kinda like it."
"Well, it won't last too much, you already know I'm leaving with Remus tomorrow morning."
He nodded slowly. "Yeah, what a pity, though. We have a lot to catch up with, don't we, darling?" he murmured, making his smile wider and sending quivers and butterflies all over my body. I let out a long sigh as a smile appeared on my face. "Haven't seen you in a whole month."
"Bet you have missed me, haven't you?" I pretended to sound uninterested but playful at the same time, even though in my mind I was craving for him to admit it out loud.
"Uhh, you can't even imagine, Lilith. Have you missed me?" Fred replied.
"Maybe-" My eyes rambled all over his room and focused on a specific object. "Hang on, is that what I think it is?!"
His eyes followed mine, a bit confused, but then chuckled when he noticed what I was looking at. "If you are thinking that's an electric guitar, then you're right."
"Oh, Merlin! Where did you get it?!" I took one of my hands to my mouth. "Can I see it?"
"'Course."
I quickly kneeled on the floor and got the guitar between my hands. It was of a beautiful and polished black, looking really well treated. I was afraid to even breathe close to it and I couldn't help but touch carefully the strings.
"Where you got it from?"
"Remus gave it to George and me when we went to visit him at his place. Said it used to belong to a friend of his when they were younger. I've been learning to play it since then," Fred smiled.
Fred Weasley playing the guitar.... that was a view I was keeping for the night.
"Fuck! It's bloody beautiful."
"You can try to play it. I enchanted it so nobody can hear it from the first floor."
"Really?"
"Yeah, go on!
I got the correct position and try to remember any melody I could play, I sat properly on the floor, with my legs crossed, and started to play the start of Nothing Else Matters by Metallica. It was one of the easiest ones for me to remember and to play so it came out quite natural. I could feel Fred's eyes on me as I kept playing, fully concentrated on catching the exact notes and making the guitar sound as good as it deserved.
Since it was a bit difficult to play without a spike, I ended the song when a second guitar should have joined. As I raised my eyes back to Fred's, I found him looking at me with a fierce bright on them and his mouth slightly open.
"Wicked..." he murmured. "You surprise me more every single day, Arambella... Fuck, that was so bloody attractive!"
I giggled putting the guitar back in its place and standing up.
"You'll have to play for me," I said while approaching Fred slowly.
Before I could notice and still with that dim smirk on his face, he grabbed my wrist and dragged me closer to him to make me sit on his lap, quickly surrounding my hips with his hands.
"One day..." he whispered in a seductive tone, tempting me. His hands squeezed my hip a bit more, glueing me more to his body. "I've fucking missed you so much, darling."
The butterflies in my stomach were happier than ever.