After that vacation, I went back to Manila to start working but after a year I went back to that resort and met her again.
"Ay sorry Sir!!" she said when she accidentally hit me with the cleaning cart, but actually it wasn't an accident I just really wanna encounter her.
"It's fine," I said and couldn't help but smile, he nodded her head and said sorry again, and left. My heart beats so fast, so that's her voice. Beautiful as expected...
"Tita so your husband is gonna be the one holding this resort from now on?" I ask my Mom's friend, "Yes iho, since I'm going to England for good, don't worry Alliana's position here in the resort, is clear after a month she's gonna start as the research analyst of the resort ok don't worry my husband will take care all of your request" I smile and nodded.
"Thank you Tita," I said, after a month I became the CEO of Delavine's scents. I grab that chance to make and grab her from that resort and let her work in our company.
"Cadmus Geib Delavine, chief executive officer," the first thing she said when she entered my office, is my name... my happiness was unexplainable at that moment.
"You're right, that's me," I said and smiled, my heart beating so fast like I was in an interview. I feel so nervous right now...
"Alliana Candice Callereese Cortez how are you connected to one of my new employees Aberry Callereese?" I said when she sat in front of me... the whole time I'm explaining her job makes me act like a shy guy for their crush.
She's staring and observing me the whole time, and I can't help but fall even more for those eyes.
I was so happy that I made her stay near my sight but I end up knowing that she's in love with somebody already. There is this guy who is an aspiring artist that hid her as his girl while he already has an on-screen girlfriend.
I have a fight with that guys, and for the first time in my life, I let someone fucking hit my face because I don't want to frighten Alliana but I just watch her care so much for that damn lucky guy.
I took the advantage of knowing their secret against Alliana, to make her date with me. At first, I know I look so stupid on blackmailing her just for her to date me, I was like a desperate man who's begging to be loved by the girl I loved.
It kills me knowing that she's just dating me for her debts but why do I care? I'm happy that I get to stay with her, kiss her, hold her and own her.
It's like owning my own lost heart again, I made her job easy and doubled the real salary of a Market research analyst just to make her happy and help her family.
After a few months that guy hurt her so badly, I wanna kill him that time but I don't wanna leave Alliana, I want her to feel that I'm always there for her.
"Be with me Alliana," those words mean a lot to me, those words kill my ego begging for love. Those words were the new start of my life being with her.
She chose me over that guy and I'm so happy that time, my happiness was unexplainable. I let everyone know that she's my girl, she met my family, my friends, employees, and I met her dad.
"Happy birthday po," I greet her father as we enter their humble home, he smiles at me and holds his crutch and tries to stand up, I help him and smile and bow my head to him. "Geib tama ba?" At first, I was shocked when Alliana called me by my second name but I feel good about it.
"Yes po" I said and nodded at him, he tapped my shoulder and we sat together, "Gusto kita para sa anak ko" he said and looked at Alliana who's busy fixing food with her grandmother. "Alam kong mahal mo ang anak ko, ganyang ko rin tignan ang mama niya noon, Geib anak kung darating ka man sa puntong hindi mo na maintindihan ang anak ko please lang subukan mo ulit siyang intindihin.. Simula bata pa kasi siya hindi niya talaga sinasabi sa kahit na sino kung ano ang totoo niyang nararamdaman kahit hirap na hirap na siya ay mas pipiliin niyang itago ito.Gusto niyang laging pinapatunayan ang kanyang sarili gaya ng kanyang Ina.Manang-mana siya kay Mama" I nodded and undertsand what he said.
"Wag mong susukuan ang anak ko ah" he said and smile at me. After that I just watch Alliana do things for her family. "Nako iho kumanta ka mana kahit isa lang," Lola Amerielle said and pull me in front of the videoke.
"I don't really sing po," I said but they insisted and I saw Alliana watch me so I grabbed the mic and sang even if my voice wasn't that good.
"I'm in my bed and you're not there and there's no one to blame but the drink in my wandering hands, Forget what I said it's not what I meant and I can't take it back I can't unpack the baggage you left" I started singing Falling by Harry styles and I didn't realize that this lyrics really hit me so bad.
"Nako Geib apo mas magaling ka pa kay Louie yong kababata nitong si Candida hahaha," Her grandfather complimented me but Alliana just avoided my gaze and stood up and went to the kitchen.
I feel pain knowing that I'm still someone she doesn't want around, "What am I now? What am I now? What if I'm someone I don't want around? I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling, what if I'm down? What if I'm out?What if I'm someone you won't talk about? I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling," I falling Alliana and you're not there to save me I guess.
***
"It will be a full family dinner," I said and put the food I cook at the table for our breakfast. I feel so delighted cooking and serving her food with love, and I will never get tired of this
"Anong oras?" she asked while she started eating. "I'll just fetch you; you want?" I said and smiled at her, god she's always so beautiful can't help falling every day. she stood up and helped me fix my necktie, like a caring wife. "No need, pupunta na lang ako don, what time?" she said and went back to her seat.
"8:00 pm," I said and she just nodded so I remained speaking, "I called Chantel last night. She's doing good with her baby Bunny, she's so cute.. I can't wait to have our own here running and playi----," she cut me off.
"Can we not talk about that," she whispered with a serious face, I chuckled and said, "Why not we're near to the marriage stage Love why not we plan----" I couldn't finish what I'm saying when he let go of the spoon and fork, stand up and avoided my gaze.
"Aalis na ako," she said and left without even looking back at me. I watch the door close and slowly nodded, trying to cope up with a heavy chest, "I understand she's not ready yet someday Cad, someday."
***
"Cadmus son are you sure she's coming?" I glanced at my wristwatch while waiting here outside our house for her, she said she's coming. I know she will...
5:30pm
6:00 pm
7:00pm
8:00pm
9:00pm
10:00 pm
"Son, we're done eating, aren't you gonna take a bi----," I put my car key in my pocket and look at my parents with a smile.
"She's not coming," I said and smiled at them before I turned my back and started walking. "Maybe next time Mom, Dad," I said and continued walking while my tears started falling.
"Drive safely son," they said, I nodded and entered my car, and drove my way home alone.
When I went home I still waited for her, "Where have you been?" I ask as soon as she enters the pad. "I was so worried about you," I said and kissed her forehead, but she avoided me and walked to the kitchen to grab some water.
"Nasa Mall lang ako Cadmus, don't exaggerate things, nagpaalam ako sayo diba"she said like it was nothing. "Yeah, but you didn't tell me that you're going to ignore the dinner and didn't show up," I said, and it was like a knife stab in my chest.
"Nakalimutan ko sorry, babawi na lang ako next time"
"I texted you a hundred times Alliana" I complain. "Sorry nakalimutan ko, tyaka hindi ko na check ang cellphone ko" and she try to remove my hands off her, don't do this now Alliana not now please.
"Pagod ako Cadmus, at wala ako sa mood kaya pwede ba bitawan mo na ako" I know she's hiding something. "Tell me the truth, where have you been Alliana! I know you when there's something off about you, something happens, tell me what the fuck it is because I'm fucking dying overthinking things!!!" I burst out, I feel so tired and I need to let this out.
"Bukas na lang tayo mag-usap Cad, kumalma ka muna" I'm so tired...
"Alliana, I'm going crazy thinking so many ways to make you tell your thoughts and problems to me but you kept on avoiding it, avoiding me. You keep telling me that you're fine when you're not, telling me that you like it even if it's not, Telling me that you're happy when you're not! Fuck! I don't know what to do anymore!!!" I'm so tired Alliana can you feel me?
"Ayaw ko ng away Cadmus, wala akong panahon sa kadramahan na ito"
"No Alliana, we talk about the dinner you properly said yes but you didn't show up, this is not the first time you did this, I know my Mom is rude but can you at least appreciate Dad's invitation, Cause you know, I look so stupid waiting for you outside our house when you did not even come, Mom and Dad said they understand if you're not coming but I was too confident with your words and tell them, No Mom she's coming, she's just late but. She never came!!! Tell me why? I'm so tired of understanding this kind of situation, Alliana." I need answers, I want her to know how hard this is for me. I even want her to pity me and hug me.
"Cadmus, wag ka nang magalit sorry na, bukas na lang natin ito pagusapan ulit matutulog na ako," I can see through her eyes that she's hiding something from me.
"No we're not going to make this wait until tomorrow, I'm so done being silent Alliana!" I shouted but she threw her wallet on the floor so I stopped.
"Kung hindi ngayon kailan pa Alliana? Ang gusto ko lang naman sabihin mo sa akin kung saan ka nagpunta at bakit hindi ka sumipot gaya ng dati!!!" I still want to fix us up.
"Diba sinabi ko sayo nag OT ako dati kaya hindi ako nakapunta non' bakit ba paulit-ulit na lang iyon?"I clearly know that time that she doesn't want to go with me and she just made that as an excuse.
"Ok, that's your excuse back then, now what the excuse? You didn't go to work Alliana so probably you're not on OT, tell me why didn't you show up?"
"Sinabi ko naman sayo diba, nasa Mall ako"
"You spent the whole day at the Mall roaming around?! That's insane and I know that's not you Alliana" that's insane. "I met someone, that's why I forgot about the dinner ok, sorry let's just sleep" my heart found so fast when she said someone because someone means someONE.
And I'm scared of that One I know...
"Who is that so important person that you met that made you forget an important dinner, Alliana?" I ask. "Who is that fucking person Alliana tell me" please tell me it's not him Ali.. please love don't push me away like this.
"No, Let's just sleep Love, babawi ako bukas promise" she said."Tell me Alliana who is that fucking per---" Please no...
"Si Louie, ok!!" oh god why? This is the end...
"Si Louie and nakita ko sa mall, ano ok na!!!" she shouted through my face. why?
"H-how do you f-feel s-seeing h-him a-again?" Please show me that you love me, just once.
"I'll let us go, I'll let you go," I said and turned my back on her, and tears continued falling just like my whole system fell. "No, I don't love him anymore, don't do this," she said and hugged me, but I need to do this, this is the only way we won't hurt each other anymore.
"No Alliana, I need to lose you to find me, let's stop trapping yourself in this relationship when we clearly know that this wasn't really in the first place," I need to set you free.
"Wasn't real?" she uttered.
"Yes, there is no love, because you never love me from the start." we need to let go, Alliana...
"I was the only one, who considered this relationship as love... but you?"
"You never love me Alliana" I wanna die...
After that breakup, I try my best to hide my pain from anyone and meet this girl, one of the daughters of my Mom's friend and she's kind, we have the same interest so I try to step forward and ask her to be my girlfriend to forget Alliana. Because thinking of her every night is slowly killing me.
"Marry me Lizeth," I asked her, she smiled and hugged me so tight.
"Yes, Cadmus, yes," I smile...
But I know something behind this smile keeps on wanting that one girl I let go of...
But I can't have her anymore...
"Let's all welcome our lovely bride Lizeth Rialleros," the host said and there she is, Lizeth wearing a beautiful white gown.
She started walking down the aisle...
"Wag mong susukuan ang anak ko," I suddenly hear those words from Alliana's father.
Does realization hit me? I'm the one who gives up...I give her up. I fucking give her up!!!
"Alliana's pregnant kuya believe us!!" oh god please no, not now...I'm getting married I can't stop this anymore...
"Fuck!" I wanna see her...
If only miracles happen...
"Itigil ang kasal!!!" my eyes widened when someone stopped the wedding.
"Aberry?" Oliver whispered at my side.
Oh god, this is a miracle.