I don't even know what kind of sleep deprived monstrosity this chapter is, but yeah... Enjoy?
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ALMOST A WEEK LATER, James's voice woke Sirius up way too soon and all that he wanted to do was throw Potter out the window.
Instead though, he just covered up his ears and moved on his other side, hoping that the other Marauders would forget about this stupid 'joke' and go to sleep just like he wanted to do.
But he should have known better.
He should have known that Remus was a damned perfectionist, even if it came to breaking the rules - once the plan was set, there was no stopping from getting it to the end, no if it came to Lupin.
"Sirius!" Black heard and before he could do anything, the curtains of his bed were drawn open and someone shook him slightly stronger than necessary. "Sirius, wake up." Hissed James and Padfoot sat up, frustrated, almost hitting his friend in a face with his own head.
"You act just like my mother." He growled, but all that James did was roll his eyes.
"Get out of the bed. We only have a few hours." Said Potter and Black sighed deeply.
"Get out of the bed." He mocked Potter. "You even talk like her." He decided, but slowly stood up just to see that Peter and Remus also were ready to go - which just meant that they had their wands, the invisibility cloak and the Marauders map ready and stood next to the door.
Sirius sighed deeply, but didn't say anything more. He remembered being excited for the plan just the evening before. Except that then he couldn't fall asleep for a few hours, because there was no one next to him - Maggie slept in her own dormitory this time - and he got used to sleeping with someone too much.
But it's not like he had much of a choice, so he took his wand and came to Peter and Remus.
Lupin smiled at him encouragingly and Sirius tried to smile back, but it probably looked more like a really creepy frown, cause Remus quickly looked away.
Black sighed, angry at his own face, but no one seemed to notice.
"Okay. Just to review." James spoke, getting close to the door as well. "Me and Peter do the manual work." He started and then, Sirius was almost sure of that, winked at Moony. "And Remus and Sirius take the Map and stand on guard." James took a bag that they prepared the night before.
Sirius frowned. Could it be that James and Remus had an additional joke? Like, the way Potter winked at Lupin seemed off... Black yawned and then shrugged.
Whatever, if they had a joke on him or Peter planned then he would cross that bridge once he came to it. He was too tired to think about it.
Peter opened the door, James covered all of them with the cloak and the Marauders quietly went out of their dormitory. Remus was holding the map and so Black felt safe seeing that.
After all Lupin was really careful and he rarely let mistakes or imperfections slide. He was practically a definition of good, hard work.
The four of them quickly and with no bigger trouble made their way to the Great Hall. Everything, as expected, was empty and there was no other student or teacher in the closest proximity.
The map showed them that the closest anyone has been was Filch in his office, but he didn't seem to be moving so they assumed that he was sleeping and therefore there was no danger, at least not yet.
James winked at Remus once again before he and Peter went inside of the Great Hall and took the miniature cups out of the bag.
James quickly started to enlarge them and gave them to Peter, who carried them on the other side of the room and started to put them, one next to the other, on the floor.
Sirius sighed, only then thinking that it seemed like a lot of effort for a joke that wasn't even that funny.
Or maybe it didn't seem funny now, that he wanted to go to sleep? Or maybe it was funny in the evening and now, that the morning came he sobered up. He wasn't sure.
Anyway, at first both he and Remus were silent. Moony was looking at the map and Sirius stood next to him, yawning and from time to time glancing at James and Peter.
Padfoot wasn't sure how long it lasted before Moony spoke silently.
"You could come back to bed, if you're tired." He whispered and Black raised his eyebrows at him. That proposition seemed odd, especially that they were already half a way to finish their plan.
"Why would you suggest that?" Asked Padfoot, suddenly thinking that perhaps Moony didn't want to spend time with him.
Maybe he felt that Sirius was fooling him, maybe he didn't like him anymore, maybe he wanted to kick him out from the Marauders, maybe he didn't like Sirius because Sirius liked Maggie, even though it hardly made sense, maybe...
"I dunno." Remus shrugged, interrupting Sirius's stream of thought. "You seem tired and the way is still clear." He showed the map to him and Sirius blinked a few times.
Oh.
So Remus just cared about him? That was... nice.
"Ah..." Sirius scratched the back of his head. "No, we're almost done anyway." Black said and glanced at Peter and James who didn't even put the cups on half of the floor. "And I'd rather stay here with you." Oh fuck. Why did he say that? "I mean you know, cause I like to talk to you. A lot." Merlin. Merlin. Merlin. No, it still sounded weird. "Like... uhm. Yeah. We have that connection, you know?" He squeezed out and only then shut his mouth.
He should have stopped after the first sentence, but nooo.
Of course he had to tangle himself up, he was Sirius Black, goddamn it.
"I know." Answered only Remus smiling slightly at Sirius and Padfoot also smiled. This time, however it had to look better, cause Lupin did not look away. "So how are things with Maggie?" He asked.
Sirius raised his eyebrows. He sometimes forgot that no one besides him and Maggie knew that he was gay and that it all was just a game.
So at first he just wanted to say something like 'you know, typical couple stuff, she really enjoys flirting with other guys and I enjoy listening about it' but he bit his tongue and said instead.
"She's a good person." He laughed nervously. "Really supportive." He admitted and Remus frowned slightly at that.
For a moment Moony didn't answer and only then, he finally cleared his throat and said.
"Uhm... I don't want to be... I don't know. Rude, I guess." He swallowed. "But I saw her lately... kissing with Avery." He cleared his throat again. "I mean I'm not sure if it was her, I just thought that it would be good if you knew, like you could talk or..." Remus paused. "Maybe I shouldn't have said that."
Sirius blinked a few times, feeling kind of angry at Maggie.
Why didn't she cover herself better? Ugh, he would need to talk to her about that, like seriously.
He wished her well, but what was he supposed to tell Remus now? Cause the only thing coming to his mind was 'oh, you know, that's fine cause really she's into other guys and I'm into you, so that's not a problem'.
But that option was out so Sirius said instead.
"Ah... was that last Tuesday?" He asked and when Remus nodded slowly, visibly confused, Sirius said quickly. "Ah, a funny story then, cause you know, I've been pretending to be Avery for a joke that me and Maggie made to that other Slytherin, uhm... Cherry, I think. Yeah. And we were pretending to be Avery and Maggie so that Cherry would get mad at Avery that he cheated on her with Maggie, when really it was just me and Maggie." He laughed, like it was the funniest joke ever made. "So yeah."
Remus just stared at Sirius blankly for a few seconds, completely forgetting that he had to look at the map, evidently speechless.
So, finally he just nodded his head.
"Oh." He answered. "That's odd." He added later and Sirius nodded as well.
"Yeah, I know." He agreed. "Anyway, enough about me, tell me, what's with that new haircut." He pointed at Remus, only then realising that he didn't have a new haircut.
"I don't have a new haircut." Answered Remus, possibly even more confused than before.
Sirius nodded slowly.
"Yeah?" He asked. "Oh, you seemed like you did, cause you know your hair looks really good lately, like exceedingly good. Do you have some new products?" He asked and Remus shook his head.
The two of them stood there for a moment in an awkward silence until suddenly Sirius heard a too well known voice, coming right from ahead of him.
And he never thought he would be so grateful to see McGonagall caughting them on making a joke.
"Mr Black? Mr Lupin?" She asked loudly and Moony jumped up hiding the map behind his back, completely taken off guard by the professor. "What is the meaning of this?" She asked, looking at the Great Hall behind their backs. "Mr Potter, Mr Pettigree and what do you think you're doing?" She raised her voice even more.
"They're just decorating the Great Hall." Black said quickly looking at the professor with the most innocent expression that he could make. "For uhm... Remus has nameday tomorrow." He said.
McGonagall frowned and shook her head quickly.
"Mr Black, don't even say anything." She demanded, her voice ordering, but Sirius didn't really care to listen.
"Oh, but really. We can't just let Remus not celebrate, because someone cruelly finished our attempts to make him happy." He said, putting his arm around Remus's shoulder. As he did so, he could almost feel him shiver, but he didn't see his expression so it was hard to tell why was that.
"How would cups on the floor make Mr Lupin happy?" McGonagall glared at Sirius who only shrugged as if he wanted to say 'ask him'.
Before McGonagall got to say anything more though, Peter who, along with James came to Sirius and Remus, cut in.
"What cups?" He asked, as if it could help and Sirius snorted under his breath. If it worked like that he would be able to get himself out of any detention.
But unluckily McGonagall was too smart for that. Maybe it could work for Trelawney, but even that was questionable.
"Mr Pettigree, don't treat me as if I was stupid." She glared at Peter now and the poor guy muttered under his breath.
"Actually it's Pettigrew." He said and Sirius snorted louder, mostly because he didn't notice that McGonagall got Peter's surname wrong himself.
"What are you laughing at, Mr Black?" She looked back at Sirius who, only then taking his hand away from Remus's arm, shrugged.
"We really were just trying to..." Started James this time, but McGonagall quickly interrupted them.
"Enough." She said and then sighed deeply. "All of you, detention and clean this up now." She huffed.
Sirius smiled slightly and quickly protested, taking his last chance.
"But we really did nothing wrong." He said and James, understanding what he was trying to do, added.
"Nothing at all, we just found ourselves in the wrong place, in the wrong time." Potter asurred her and Remus quickly added, squeezing the Marauders Map that he forgot to look at when he was talking with Sirius.
"We wanted to decorate the Great Hall, yes, but the cups are not our doing." He stated and Peter nodded.
"Not ours at all." He smiled awkwardly. "I'm pretty sure I saw Snape and Avery sneaking out just a second ago." He added and even though Sirius thought that it was a pretty good lie, that's when McGonagall had enough.
"Stop." She said. "You're not making any sense, whatsoever." She decided. "But at least you're in this together." She added shortly after and Sirius felt the success getting near him. "Ten points to Gryffindor for being loyal towards each other." She announced and all of the Marauders opened their mouths, shocked.
"Really?" Asked Sirius. It seemed so surreal and yet so amazing. Did they really just manage to unfreeze the heart of the most severe teacher in school?
Did they make McGonagall find love and hope again? Did they?
"No, minus twenty for lying to the teacher." Said McGonagall and Sirius felt that his knees got weak from how sassy she was. "Now, clean this up." She ordered and went away in the direction of the sunset.
Well, she didn't actually. Though Sirius wished that she did, cause not only would it underline how sassy she was, but then they could finish their project.
But she stayed and watched them destroy their work, and they had to stay in the shadow of her greatness, cleaning up their act of rebellion on her eyes.
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I just. I'm speechless. I wrote this waaaay past a reasonable hour, and I think you can tell. But imma just say that this chapter is Sirius's fever dream. They woke him up in the middle of the night and shit happened. Right?
Also, my autocorrect loves to change Peter's surname to Pettigree, so I thought I'll use it to my advantage this time.