The Kim mansion was filled with excitement after Seokjin had revealed that Jeongguk was finally agreeing to try and become a little. Yoongi and Yuri - who had to leave early - were also excited or rather, Yuri was ecstatic and Yoongi was indifferent. The young woman was going on about how she could not wait to dress Jeongguk up and be able to do his makeup for fun.
Even if Jeongguk said he would try and become a little, he never said he would be easy. Seokjin was learning that the hard way.
"I am not wearing that," Jeongguk pouted as he turned his head away from the offered neon pink onesie.
"Why not?" Seokjin asked as he shot a glare at the teenager who sat on the bed with only the pink fluffy towel with a hood.
"Too bright, and it's not cute," Jeongguk pouted.
After all, if the man wanted him to be a little, he would have to look cute since kids are supposed to be cute.
"Well, what cute onesie would you like to wear?" Seokjin asked tiredly as he tossed the onesie into the rejected pile.
"None, I want to wear those cute blue bear socks, I don't care what else I wear but I want those cute socks," Jeongguk rambled.
Seokjin let out a sigh since the younger had been fighting to wear the socks but would complain about the outfits chosen because they were 'uncomfortable'.
"You do not like the outfits and you do not want to wear onesies because they do not let you use the socks you want, at this point I am contemplating letting you wear only socks with panties," Seokjin grumbled out as he went through the drawer for more clothes.
"Well, there is this one thing I want to wear, promise I won't complain if I get to wear it with my cute socks," Jeongguk said happily.
"Oh? What is the catch here?" Seokjin asked since he saw the smile Jeongguk wore.
It was the same one the teenager wore whenever he said he would take a bath, as long as he got to play with toys in the tub. That was a mistake, Seokjin wondered if the cleaners would be able to get the shampoo off of the lights over the tub.
"Well..." Jeongguk played with his fingers nervously as he looked up at Seokjin with a shy smile. "It may or may not be in your closet," Jeongguk confessed.
He had grown an attachment to said hoodie whenever he had woken up in the morning in the man's room.
There in the closet - what scared Jeongguk the most about waking up there was that he had probably slept with the closet door open - was a blue hoodie with a peanut butter jar design on the upper left of the hoodie and Jeongguk had wanted it.
"Huh? Do you want to wear one of my dress shirts?" Seokjin asked, confused.
After all, he was not aware that Jeongguk had seen into his closet of disguises.
"No, not at the moment at least," Jeongguk said.
"Then what are you referring to?" Seokjin asked, confused.
Jeongguk hummed as he swung his legs.
"I saw this cute blue hoodie with like a peanut butter jar design on it; I want to wear it. I saw it in your closet," Jeongguk said shyly as he played with the dangling ear from his towel. He bit his bottom lip and looked up at the man with wide shiny eyes. "Please?" Jeongguk asked expecting the man to refuse but instead saw the man holding up two items.
"We will head to my room after you put these on, oh what pants do you want to wear?" Seokjin asked Jeongguk as he bent down.
The man grabbed one of Jeongguk's feet and slid on the sock that Jeongguk had been fighting to wear for a while before switching to the other foot and doing the same thing. Jeongguk remained silent over the questions on pants since he wanted to wear the hoodie before he chose pants, after all, he had to make sure they complemented one another.
"Do you want to wear these panties? Or different ones?" Seokjin asked as he showed Jeongguk the baby blue panties which had R on the back.
"Yes!" Jeongguk said happily and Seokjin nodded as he gently put the panties on.
He had had them custom made since Jeongguk had a weird obsession over the letter R.
"Stand up baby," Seokjin said as he slid the item of clothing up.
As Jeongguk stood up to make the slide easier. Jeongguk felt goosebumps engulf his leg as he felt the man's hand brush against his leg. That was normal...right?
"Up you go baby," Seokjin said as he picked up Jeongguk with one hand.
"What about my R?" Jeongguk asked since he had taken comfort in the stuffed animal in the time that Seokjin had to leave him alone to get his lotions for Jeongguks skin.
"Right, here you go baby boy," Seokjin said as he reached over and handed Jeongguk his favorite stuffed animal. Jeongguk smiled as he hugged the stuffed animal close to his chest.
"Daddy?" Jeongguk asked as Seokjin walked them towards the door.
"What is it, baby boy?" Seokjin asked as he opened the door.
"You know, for the mafia leader, you sure are nice. Is it weird that I'm kind of glad that you kidnapped me?" Jeongguk asked softly.
Seokjin felt himself freeze for a second at Jeongguk's words.
He was nice?
As if.
While Jeongguk slept he was ordering people around and organizing deaths. He had even had a rookie group - Stray Kids - go out kidnap a CEO's only child, murder the CEO's wife, frame the CEO as the killer of his wife and daughter as well as plant drugs on him. That was all because the man had accidentally found out one of their spies in his company. He had the audacity to fire the man and Seokjin was not pleased by that, so he made sure the man would not be able to find out the other spies.
Ever.
The only 'nice' thing that Seokjin had done in that case was to take in the daughter, however, he was not sure if that was exactly nice since the daughter was going to be trained to be a killer and spy. She would not be allowed to follow whatever dreams she had previously and her inevitable death would be dying in a mission.
As for the kidnapping part, Seokjin was positive that was not by any standards normal. If anything, what Jeongguk was feeling was Stockholm syndrome.
"If you say so," Seokjin muttered since he knew that Jeongguk would argue with him.
"R, I'm right, right?" Jeongguk asked the stuffed animal as Seokjin sighed.
If he had tried to argue with Jeongguk then the younger would have brought out the teddy bear as a defendant on his side.
"Oh look, we are at my room," Seokjin said as he opened the door and Jeongguk took in the scenery again.
After all, the teenager had not particularly paid attention to the room whenever he was in there earlier that morning. Jeongguk found himself looking at the pink stuffed bunny on the man's desk. Did the man also like stuffed animals?
Before Jeongguk could ask about the stuffed animal, Seokjin spoke.
"After I find the hoodie all I have to worry about are the pants because believe me that I will not let you walk around with your bottom exposed," Seokjin muttered as he sat Jeongguk down on his bed before heading to his closet where the hoodie Jeongguk wished to wear was.
"But weren't you the one who said you might have to send me out of my room with only panties and socks?" Jeongguk asked, confused.
"I meant it sarcastically," Seokjin said as he opened the closet door to show the assortment of clothes he wore on missions.
Immediately he found the hoodie since it was the closest one to him.
"Yay! Look R! Daddy found it!" Jeongguk said excitedly to the stuffed animal.
The teenager was not sure why anyone would talk to a stuffed animal but he saw the other littles doing that very thing so he mimicked them.
"Does my baby boy want to keep the hoodie?" Seokjin asked as he walked over with the cute hoodie.
"Can I really?" Jeongguk asked in awe as he made grabby hands but the man simply undid his towel to expose his upper half.
"Arms up, and of course. I only wore it once or twice," Seokjin explained as he slid the hoodie on and Jeongguk was ecstatic.
"Do I look cute, Daddy? Oh, I bet I do," Jeongguk said giddily as he snuggled into the blue hoodie.
"As cute as can be, what pants do you want to wear? Ah, it would have been a better idea to get your pants on before heading over here," Seokjin sighed but saw Jeongguk smiling that smile once again.
"...What pants do you want to wear?" Seokjin asked with a sigh as Jeongguk giggled.
"Do you have sweatpants? My legs are getting cold," Jeongguk pouted.
"Yeah, what color?" Seokjin questioned as he walked over to his drawer.
"You pick daddy," Jeongguk said as he flapped the sleeves of the hoodie - which was way too big for him - around and smiling like a child.
"Black it is," Seokjin muttered as he grabbed the said pair and walked over to Jeongguk.
"Look R, I look like a bird now, right?" Jeongguk asked the stuffed animal, and that was all Seokjin overheard from the teenagers 'conversation' with the stuffed animal he had bought back in Busan.
"Same deal as when we put on your panties," Seokjin said as he bent down and began to put the sweatpants onto Jeongguk.
"Okay!" Jeongguk said happily as he stood up and held onto Seokjin's shoulders for balance.
"And to tie them since they are too big," Seokjin said.
A tie later and Seokjin was looking at Jeongguk's complete outfit, the older would be lying if he said that Jeongguk did not look cute at the moment. However, was he going to tell Jeongguk that? Of course not.
"Come on, let's go eat breakfast, I bet your little friends are ecstatic to talk to you about being a little," Seokjin said as he took hold of Jeongguk's hand, the towel Jeongguk wore remaining on his bed.
"Okay Daddy," Jeongguk said as he brought R closer to his chest, nervousness building up in his chest.
"It will be okay baby boy, " Seokjin said as he looked down at the teenager holding his hand.
The teenager looked slightly scared and had his beloved stuffed animal to his chest.
"I-I know that, " Jeongguk whispered as he looked down at the ground nervously.
Seokjin said nothing as he pulled Jeongguk closer to him, his hand gripped Jeongguk's tighter but not tight enough for it to hurt.
Jeongguk felt comforted by the older man's gesture and smiled softly as he felt his face heat slightly.
The man's gesture may be silent but to Jeongguk it made him feel comforted, and all the nervousness he had disappeared.
It was going to be okay.
~~~
Jeongguk silently drank from his baby bottle as he listened in on his daddy and the others talk about whatever mafia-related thing. Jeongguk was pretty bored by everything and playing with R could keep him entertained for only so long.
"What?!"
Jeongguk jumped at Taehyung yelling and looked up with wide eyes whenever he felt all eyes on him.
"D-daddy, why are they all looking at me again?" Jeongguk asked in a panic.
All eyes had been on him at the beginning of the breakfast but that had gone away after some questions and breakfast being served.
"Why didn't you torture him for everything?" Taehyung asked and Jeongguk suddenly felt his chest grow tight.
It was as if someone clenched his lungs harshly and refused to let them do their job.
"I-I, " Jeongguk whispered out breathlessly as tears filled his vision as what he did came flooding back.
"Bad Taetae! You make Ggukie cry!" Jimin yelled at his best friend and Jeongguk wanted to desperately tell them he was not crying but he felt the hot tears hit his cheeks.
Jeongguk felt as if eyes were burning him from behind and he felt a cold hand caress his cheek. He let out a panicked scream as he scrambled away from whatever touched him only to fall on the ground.
"Baby are you okay?" Seokjin quickly asked as he got out of his chair and knelt down next to Jeongguk.
The teenager's eyes were filled with tears as he gasped for air.
"T-they're going to come after me," Jeongguk whimpered as he closed his eyes and cried harder.
"Taehyung, go to our room now," Hoseok ordered and the little was trembling as tears gathered in his eyes.
"G-ggukie, Taetae sorry!" He said in a shaky voice before running away to his room before Hoseok began his punishment in front of everyone.
"Breathe in and out," Seokjin instructed Jeongguk as he picked the teenager up.
Jeongguk continued to hyperventilate as he pressed himself closer to the man who carried him.
"I-I can feel them breathing down my neck," Jeongguk whimpered out as he dug his head into the crook of the man's neck.
"All of you forget what you saw and heard today about him, tell Hoseok and Taehyung as well," Seokjin ordered everyone who was able to hear them.
"Yes boss," Everyone responded in unison as they watched Jeongguk get carried away by the mafia leader.
"Daddy, do you think Boss will handle this situation well?" Jimin asked Namjoon as he looked at the retreating figures with worry.
Namjoon sighed as he watched the mafia leader go out of sight.
"Believe it or not, baby boy but, the leader does have emotions. I think he is capable of handling the situation despite not being taught by us how to do so, I just hope he does so and forgets about how a mafia leader should repress all emotion at all times," Namjoon muttered as he ran a hand through his hair.
"I hope so too," Jimin whispered as he bit on his lip nervously.
Meanwhile, Seokjin was speaking to Jeongguk softly as he rubbed circles on Jeongguk's back.
"Baby, do you want to talk about it? The more you hold back on it, the more it will bother you, if not to me then I could get a therapist," Seokjin whispered as he recalled the sleepless nights he spent alone crying.
The invisible hands reaching deep into him and ripping at his soul.
"P-promise not to tell?" Jeongguk whispered out as he wiped more tears away with his hoodie sleeve.
"I am just here to listen to you, what you say stays between you and me unless you say otherwise. The same goes for if I tell you something in secret," Seokjin said.
"P-pinky p-promise?" Jeongguk asked softly as he held out his small pinky from under the hoodie sleeve.
Seokjin smiled softly as he held out his own pinky.
"Pinky promise, I will not promise that I will not get mad though," Seokjin said as he wrapped his pinky around Jeongguk's pinky.
The younger smiled a small smile as he nodded as they let their pinkies fall apart.
"A-as you know, I was under the same company for years," Jeongguk started nervously.
"Mhm," Seokjin hummed as he subconsciously pulled the younger closer to him despite the younger sitting on his lap.
"I didn't know what was right and what was wrong," Jeongguk shook slightly and quickly wiped away the tears which were falling. "They knew that... they took advantage of that," Jeongguk whispered as he closed his eyes.
"The first incident I can remember is a week after I got accepted into the company," Jeongguk whispered as he felt a large lump in his throat. "They...they walked in while I was showering and yelled at me for messing up a move in the practiced choreography we were learning, I was really scared. They saw me naked and I couldn't muster up the courage to yell at them to get out because I had done something wrong first," Jeongguk said.
Seokjin felt anger fill his system but he was not the one who needed comforting at the moment. He felt how badly Jeongguk was shaking and decided to take care of him before he took care of his anger.
"Can I hug you?" Seokjin asked.
The mafia leader knew better than to do a sudden action on someone who was traumatized.
"Please," Jeongguk whispered.
The older man wrapped his arms around Jeongguk and pulled him into his chest. Jeongguk took a deep breath of the man's addicting scent, it calmed him down and even brought out happy memories.
"Can you go on?" Seokjin asked softly and Jeongguk took another big inhale before nodding.
Jeongguk went on about the inappropriate glances, the close distances that were uncomfortable, the gestures towards his body, and even the inappropriate nicknames he was given.
"I feel so disgusted in myself," Jeongguk gasped as he finished telling Seokjin of everything done to him by the people under that company. "I don't feel sorry for killing them. I-I wish I did more..."
"Jeongguk," Seokjin whispered as he caressed the crying teenager's face.
Everything that had happened to the teenager was way more than what anyone should have gone through. After all, he was supposed to be a normal teenager, not whatever the hell he went through. Even though Jeongguk had killed, he was still a regular human being who knew killing was wrong yet he enjoyed it.
"A-am I not made to be an idol? Or even a person? I liked..." Jeongguk cried out, not wanting to finish his deep secret as his hands held onto Seokjin's shirt.
"Baby, you are an innocent person with a lot of talent that I forced you to forget," Seokjin said as he pulled Jeongguk closer. "Look, I will make a concert and a boy group just for you. I will give you a concert and everything; if I do all of that will you forgive me?" Seokjin asked as Jeongguk's heaving calmed slightly.
After hearing those words though, Jeongguks breathing became way more stable and he opened his eyes. The tear-stained lashes seemed to make Seokjin's heartache even more.
"R-really?" Jeongguk whispered in shock.
Seokjin smiled as he nodded, "Of course, if you asked me to buy you the world I would try," Seokjin paused as he ignored the weird feeling in his chest as one of his thumbs wiped a stray tear. "Though, I do not know if I could buy you and give you yourself."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I hate this chapter too.