Isabelle
"It's very sad to be making cake you can't eat,"
"The baking is fun though. I bet you could try small slice,"
"Yeah, I will,"
"What shape shall we make it?" Ashton said, "We have a star, or a heart, or a square,"
"Why do you have so many?"
"Baking is fun!"
"I never bake,"
"Well now you do,"
I chose the star and helped Ash pour it in, then we sat on the sofa while we waited for it to bake. Forcing them to sit together, I sat at the end next to Kaykay and watched some youtube on my own, glad to be back home.
My main feeling was still sadness. A deep sadness. I hadn't known Rudy for long, but that made it worse because I would never get to know him. He was just like us and deserved to live.
It also made me scared. That could have happened to me. It could happed to anyone. I had almost died twice, nothing was stopping a third time.
It made my chest tighten to think about it, only that made it worse because my breathing was the part everyone was concerned about.
While the cake cooled, I stayed on the sofa whilst watching youtube, Kaykay and Ash cleaning the house a bit. Then, they called me to decorate and let me ice the cake.
"Got you!" Kaykay said, booping my nose with icing.
"Hey,"
"Don't worry, I'll get her back," Ash said, swiping some down her cheek, "Now no more because we will waste the icing,"
"Oh, you are not getting off that easily,"
Kaykay smacked icing on his face and he gasped; he kissed her and then pressed his face on hers to spread it over.
I moved the cake away from them and carefully iced it, putting sprinkles on top. Ash bumprd into me and send them scattering across the floor, but they only laughed more.
They truly were in love.
I admired how Kaykay had left our old home. Maybe I should have tried sooner, but I had no clue how. It wasn't time for me to go to uni, and I couldn't get a job for some money. Kaykay must have had one, but that clearly didn't work well for them so I wasn't given the opportunity.
"That looks awesome!"
"It's so much fun being here,"
"Well you will be back by Friday night,"
"That's so long,"
"I know," Kaykay said, "But it will be extra fun when you're home again,"
"I suppose,"
"We're gonna have a movie night tonight, what do you think?"
"I'm tired,"
"Awh, come on,"
"I dunno,"
"We can paint our nails?"
"Okay,"
She smiled and hugged me, kissing my head.
"You have to be fed first though,"
"I know,"
After Ash had fed me on the sofa, they both made their own food while I chose some films and nail polish. I decided to text Iza, to see how he was, as well as Aimee.
I had begun to felt like a big sister to her. At the pizza party, all of us had bonded a lot more because we kind of had to. Who else were we going to hang out with?
Aimee
Hi
Isabelle
Just wanted to check up on you
Aimee
I am okay
Isabelle
Really?
Aimee
No. That was a lie. I don't feel so good because I refuse to let the doctors work
Isabelle
Oh, Aimee, that's not good. I get it, I refused to be fed, but my head is much clearer now that I am being looked after.
Aimee
Really?
Isabelle
Yeah... you're gonna come to chemo tomorrow, right?"
Aimee
I guess, yeah. I am really scared
Isabelle
Yeah, I get it. I'll be there! I am coming back to hospital tomorrow morning
Aimee
Good. I might let them give me medicine and food now
Isabelle
Great idea! I'll see you tomorrow, sleep well.
"Who are you texting?"
"Aimee,"
"From the hospital?"
"Yeah,"
"How is she getting on?" Ashton asked, turning the film on.
"She said she might eat and let the doctors give her medicine now, so I guess she hasn't been doing either,"
"Bless her little cotton socks,"
"Do her parents stay?"
"They work out of town, so no,"
"Oh, that must be hard,"
"They do visit all the time, they just can't stay,"
I nodded and turned my phone off, putting the dvd in the tv since they were eating now. Kaykay threw a blanket over me and tickled my chin, but I swat her hand and dropped my jaw.
"I am 16!"
"And?"
"I'm not a baby ,"
"You wanted me to cuddle you all of last night,"
"But you don't need to tickle me!"
Ash sniggered and I turned to him, raising my eyebrows.
"You did it too!"
"When?"
"When you fed me,"
He broke into laughter and I hit his leg, grinning myself.
"I am sick, but I am still 16,"
"She's back," Kaykay said, "The sass is back,"
"The sass never went. Now shush, the film is on,"
I tried not to think about going back to that dreaded, boring and quiet hospital room tomorrow and enjoy the film. Kaykay gave me a little bit of cake to eat, and then I decided to squish myself between them and rest in Ashton's arms.
Thankfully he wasn't sick anymore, because I really couldn't do that again.
He traced small hearts on my arm as we watch the film, and I was finally able to relax.
"You guys make me so happy,"
"You make us happy!" Kaykay said, squeezing my shoulder, "Shall we go and pack some bits for the hospital?"
"I guess,"
"They're gonna crank the heating up soon, it's getting colder, so I'd take some tshirts incase you get hot," Ash said, "I am gonna call my mum if that's okay,"
He kissed my cheek and then I followed Kaykay upstairs, opening my wardrobe.
"Izz, do these clothes all fit? I mean, these look tiny,"
"No. We were gonna order comfy clothes, remember?"
"Oh gosh, I am so sorry. We can do that in a moment,"
"The clothes should fit," I mumbled, "I am always too swollen,"
"Well we can always save them for after your treatment,"
"They're years old anyway,"
"Pack what fits and I'll tackle the rest,"
I put my joggers in the bag, as well as my jumpers, but most of my tops were tight fitting and when I tried one on, I just got upset.
"We can get Ash to lend you some, then order new tops,"
"Okay,"
"You're still beautiful,"
"I have tubes poking out of me,"
"It doesn't matter. You are my very gorgeous little sister,"
"I am quite little compared to you,"
"I know. When they said they were having you, it was quite a surprise,"
"Probably wanted to have something else to glue them together once you were gone,"
"Maybe so," she mumbled, "That didn't work I guess,"
"At least I am here now, with you guys. You have no idea how wanted you make me feel,"