I've been left out alone like a damn criminal
I've been praying for help cause I can't take it all
I'm not done,
It's not over.
Blood-red sparks of light soon covered the once blue-glowing barrier around Hogwarts, Katherine tasting a small amount of her own blood in her mouth from the bite she had on the inside of her cheek. Around her, the Death Eaters were chanting and yelling from delight, delight that made her sick to her stomach. People were going to die tonight, good people with lives not yet fully lived, bad people who in her mind deserved what was coming to them, professors who had dedicated years of their lives to the school and might now perish alongside the castle, and students-children who are going to be fighting dangerous adults and perhaps the Dark Lord himself.
Children like Elowen.
She knew that just across the field her sister would be armed and ready for the impending malicious battle. Elowen was still only a child at 17 years old just like Harry Potter and all the other students who would be fighting for Hogwarts. Despite being years apart Katherine had no doubt in her mind that her sister was just as mature if not more mature than herself. All she could do was hope that they would both make it out of the war well and alive. She felt Lucius's grip on her arm tighten as Voldemort began storming towards the castle. Her vision of red turned to flashes of black and grey as Death Eater after Death Eater passed by her.
"We have to go and go now. Just follow my lead and do not stray from my side until this over," whispered Lucius. Of course, he was still quite annoyed that she had accompanied him. He would have preferred that she had stayed at the manor looking pretty awaiting his triumphant return. But Katherine was a fighting spirit who refused to spend her time worrying over the outcome. It was limited, but control was in her possession. And she would not let anyone close to her die, not when Elowen was her only family left and Lucius was the man she had grown to fall in love with.
Beside her, Lucius was mumbling something to Narcissa about her leaving the group to try to find Draco. The plan according to Lucius divided them into two, he would stay alongside her and fight while Narcissa would search for their missing son. Watching as the desperate mother took off towards the shadowy castle, Katherine followed Lucius in the opposite direction towards the Hogwarts courtyard. He was still gripping onto her arm tightly as he led her through the familiar forest. It was exactly the same as it had been when she had attended school, though the normally bright green pastures seemed dull in the moonlight.
After what seemed like hours of painful running they finally reached the entrance to Hogwarts. The once-powerful intimidating castle was captured by laughing Death Eaters and fighting students. Billowing flames towered above her as the heat from the multiple fires stung at her skin. Through the corner of her eye, she could see cowering students battling heinous Snatchers and Death Eaters, tossing countercharms and defensive spells against the curses. She narrowly dodged a stray spell that had come at her, sending a defensive charm back towards the direction it came from. At that moment she began to get nervous about the long battle ahead of her. Never a skilled dueler, the thought of having to be alert once she left Lucius's side terrified her. Surviving the night would be a miracle.
Lucius was still pulling her through amongst the blazing chaos, only letting go of his tight grip on her once they entered the castle itself. The hallway was unusually empty, though not silent as the yells from outside echoed through them. Katherine recognized the stone walls and tiled flooring of the castle she had inhibited years before. Hogwarts, once lively and welcoming, seemed dead now, with bits of the pristine tile now cracked and crumbled from the fight. The two slowed their run into a quick walk as they trod down the ominous halls, the night sky flashing green and red just outside the stained glass windows.
"I am sure this is not the happy reunion visit you were expecting," Lucius said quietly, his wand held carefully before him in defense.
"It isn't, really. Of course, it's been almost a decade since I walked these halls for the last time, but funny enough being back here has resurfaced so many of my old school memories. Though now is not the time for reminiscing," Katherine responded, pointing her own wand ahead of her as well. "Despite the shit show outside it seems pretty calm inside. Where are we heading exactly?"
"I am not sure. Just follow me, do not go off on your own. I promise I will keep you safe."
Just as he ended his sentence, a group of Gryffindor students rushed down the corridor. Katherine paused for a second when she spotted Elowen leading the pack, the two sisters making eye contact for a moment. Time slowed as Katherine studied her sister's distasteful expression as the group passed them, heading out into the fiery abyss that was the outside courtyard of Hogwarts.
The fighting went on for hours, the witch and the wizard battling through the night. Lucius and Katherine had managed to sneak their way through the castle without much incident (though Katherine had almost gotten her hands crushed by a stray piece of stone) and were making their way towards the top of one of the highest towers of Hogwarts. The casualties were climbing in numbers on both sides and both were fearing the worst. Lucius was seeking out Voldemort to try to negotiate the ending of the never-ceasing hellfire.
"I can attempt to reason with him, Katherine. He has lost so many of his forces to continue on would be mad," mumbled Lucius as they stepped into the dimly lit tower. Outside, the shimmering yet murky water of the Great Lake was illuminated in the moonlight. Nightfall had crept upon the castle that was very much awake with action. A dark figure stood at the edge of the open balcony, stringy white hands gripping the wand that once belonged to Albus Dumbledore.
Voldemort turned around at the sound of their quiet footsteps.
"Ah, Lucius and his little parasite. What a lovely surprise on my night of triumph," hummed the Dark Lord as he strode towards the two. Lucius opened his mouth to speak as Katherine stepped behind him, her hand resting atop his shoulder. "My Lord... might it... be less, uh - might it not be more prudent to call off this attack and simply seek the boy yourself?"
Katherine nodded in agreement but she stayed silent. If she dared to open her mouth surely she would be killed in an instant. Her opinions were not welcome nor valued in the eyes of Tom Riddle.
"I do not need to seek the boy! Before the night is out, he will come to ME! Do you understand!" hissed Voldemort in an angry response. Lucius jumped at the sudden rage before moving himself in front of Katherine protectively.
"Look at me! How can you live with yourself, Lucius?"
Watching fearfully as Voldemort backhanded his cheek, Katherine immediately ran to Lucius's side to prevent him from falling back against the hardwood railing. He looked weaker than she had ever seen him, so frail in the presence of the evil lord. A moment of weakness, just what she needed in order to possibly sway him to her side. Lucius was a man of tradition but maybe, just maybe she could convince him that this war was based on idiocy.
"I don't know," was the meek response.
"I am disgusted even looking at you. You were once such a valiant and loyal servant to me, now you are a simple worm groveling at my feet. All because you found a useless whore who swore she could change you. You are just as pathetic as she is. Perhaps you would return to your former state if she was dead," hissed Voldemort, who was now pointing his wand into Katherine's stomach.
"Please, my lord," pleaded Lucius. "I shall do whatever you ask me to if you spare her life. You have already lost so many loyal servants tonight. I do not doubt your ability to carry this plan through, I was simply offering you a suggestion."
Voldemort reluctantly retracted his wand before pushing Katherine onto the floor beneath him, the impact of the ground against her skin causing her to wince in slight pain.
"I do not take orders from you, my slippery friend. Speak out of line again and she will die. Go and find Severus. Bring him to me."
-
Lucius had become the Grim Reaper leading Severus Snape to his death. Despite not witnessing the brutal slaughter of the long-haired professor, ultimately he was the one who had brought him into the Dark Lord's clutches. In fact, if it wasn't for Katherine stumbling into the Headmaster's Office after doing another round of fighting throughout the castle, they would have never found Snape's still body.
The most comforting part was the look of peace that rested across his face. Despite the blood that pooled underneath his lifeless body, the old potions master seemed to be simply caught in a content dream. Lucius, ever one to hide his emotions, was holding back tears beside her, her hand grasping his in supportive comfort. The pair stood in front of him in respectful silence for a moment before Katherine finally spoke.
"Are you okay, Lucius?" she asked quietly. The man beside her sunk his teeth into his trembling lip as she felt her hand being squeezed tightly. Despite the two of them never getting along, she understood the complex relationship Snape and Lucius had and how, if he was asked, Lucius would probably call the professor his most trusted friend.
"Did you ever come to find out why he helped you see me in Azkaban, Katherine? Severus-" he choked on his words as if his tongue was being burnt just by uttering them. "Severus was deeply in love with Potter's mother ever since his youth. As you know she tragically died the same year your parents died, killed by the Dark Lord himself." He paused for a moment to catch his breath. "Severus helped you because he somehow empathized with you, how desperate you were to stay with me. I know he never showed it but he had cared about you slightly. He simply didn't want you to suffer without me as he did without Potter's mother." Lucius finished as he bowed his head, icy eyes still gazing at his fallen acquaintance.
"He-the Dark Lord, I mean, killed him. I still can't understand why you can still stand here and support him even after all he has done to you and your family. At what point do you become aware of all of the death that surrounds you, how far gone he truly is? He is out there attempting to fight, to kill a 17-year-old boy. Why?"
Lucius turned his head to her with a flash of a sympathetic gaze. "I have to ask that you do not speak of things you know nothing about. I think you forget that your loyalty was pledged to the Dark Lord when I saved you from his wrath at the graveyard, and, might I add, you also fell for someone who is considered his compliant right-hand man. Now is not the time to be speaking of treason," he hissed, Katherine shuddering at his sudden anger.
She let go of his hand to place a hand against the soft fabric of his robes. Reasoning with him was no use, he was deep in delusion just like Voldemort. Against her judgment, however, she pressed on hoping she would be able to break him. "Lucius, I know you understand this is absolute madness. Children are fighting for their lives, there are good witches and wizards battling to their death right now! Your wife, your son, even me, and everything you love is in danger, can you not see that? Only one side can come out of this long war victorious. You have a chance to be on the winning side."
Lucius for a moment looked as if he was taking her words into consideration. But just as he opened his mouth to respond, Voldemort's rasping voice echoed throughout the now dilapidated castle.
"You have fought valiantly, but in vain. I do not wish this. Every drop of magical blood spilled is a terrible waste. I, therefore, command my forces to retreat. In their absence, dispose of your dead with dignity. Harry Potter, I now speak directly to you. On this night, you have allowed your friends to die for you rather than face me yourself. There is no greater dishonor. Join me in the Forbidden Forest and confront your fate. If you do not do this, I shall kill every last man, woman, and child who tries to conceal you from me."
An armistice. Peace was upon them even if just for a single moment in time.
"Lucius...I have to leave you," muttered Katherine as she took his hands in hers. "I simply can't fight this battle alongside you any longer, you have to know this entire war will not end well for anyone. I have stayed loyal to you, I can assure you that, but that loyalty does not extend to the Dark Lord. I know I am betraying you but-"
She was unable to finish her sentence before she was silenced by his sudden embrace.
His hands gripped desperately against her dampened cheeks as their lips met in a final desperate kiss. It was like the kiss they had shared before he had been locked away to rot in Azkaban, passionate and warm as if it was the last kiss they would ever share. Lucius was trying to sway her, remind her of everything that he could provide her with, how much he cared for her. She whined softly as their lips broke apart, his forehead pressing against hers ever so slightly.
"Do not make that mistake. Please, stay with me. The Order-they are going to lose. Your moral compass may be guiding you to their cause but I can assure you that if you stand by my side you will be guaranteed safety," began Lucius, desperately trying to convince her to stay. "If you lose this war there will be no more riches, no more fancy parties. You will lose your esteemed place in my life and in society. But if you fight alongside me I will marry you, Katherine, you know that my relationship with Narcissa is simply hanging on by a breaking thread," he cooed, wiping away a stray tear that was falling down her face with his thumb. The rough leather of his robe scratched her face causing her to whimper. "More than a mistress, my equal. It's all yours if you stay with me and fight this battle. Katherine Malfoy has such a gorgeous ring to it."
Temptation and being able to resist it was one of her many flaws. His proposal taunted her, she would prove everyone wrong, maybe they would have a shot at the life she always craved to have with him. Everything she wanted, right in front of her fingertips. But as she stared into his sunken eyes, she realized he too was far gone to be saved. All she could think of was the look on Elowen's face when she had spotted them earlier in the corridor, a look of pure disappointment and disgust. Her sister was her only living family, and what kind of sister would Katherine be if she chose a life of luxury and marriage to a Malfoy over the moral path she knew was the right one? If Voldemort won the darkness the magical world she loved so much would endure would be too much for her to handle.
Alongside the war happening outside, she was facing her own battle between her love for Lucius and her inner desire to fight for the greater good. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted one of the photos that lines the wall of the dim Headmaster's Office. It was a moving photograph of two smiling Slytherins students, their robes emblazoned with shining Head Boy and Head Girl badges. The bottom of the ornate frame read a familiar name.
Arlo Farrington and Blythe Winslow, 1962.
Her parents. Her parents who had died because they had believed in the idea that Voldemort's ideas were dangerous and irrational, a plague on the wizarding world. While every other member of their house was being recruited for his wicked schemes they stood strong, a valuable asset to the Order of the Phoenix. To continue to blindly follow Lucius would be the ultimate betrayal to them and all they had fought for.
The cost would be too great. She decided she would rather die fighting for the Order than continue this life of a double agency. Katherine Farrington was not a Death Eater, no Dark Mark tainted her forearm. Walking away from Lucius and the control he had over her would take everything she had, but in the end, she had to listen to her mind that was screaming for her to believe the Order and Harry Potter and pure good would win.
"I decline your offer. The Dark Lord will lose and you will come crawling for my forgiveness at the end of this war."
Lucius narrowed his eyes at her, and she could tell he was in utter shock at her refusal to follow him any longer. "You ignorant bitch. If you stay here and fight for the Order whatever we had shared with one another is dead. If you perish I shall not mourn you as you have dug your own grave," he taunted, pressing his now outstretched wand underneath her chin.
"Then I shall have no one to mourn me. My funeral will have no spectators, and I will die a death of nobility and not cowardice. And you, Lucius Malfoy, will die alone. You do not own me any longer," responded Katherine as she gripped his wrist to pry his wand away from her face.
Taking one last look at the man behind her, Katherine walked away. Her footsteps echoed on the hard floor beneath her, Lucius not bothering to follow her. There was not an ounce of regret in her mind as she trod down the hollow and empty corridors. All around her she could see fallen students, terrified children who were tending to their friend's wounds. One poor girl who she recognized as one of Elowen's friends laid with deep bloody gashes in her face. A Ravenclaw boy was helping a limping girl towards the Great Hall, Katherine following suit.
The Great Hall was emptied of its usual tables, instead replaced with rows of cots that housed wounded bodies. Many were hugging each other, mourning their fallen friends and fellow students. The Weasleys were crying beside one body, Katherine noticing that there was one twin missing from the large family. Madam Pomfrey was handing out cups of water and medical supplies so that she could attend to the direst cases. So much destruction and death in just a few hours.
"Ah, a pleasure to see you, Miss Farrington."
She turned to see Professor McGonagall standing beside Victor, who had a deep gash in his forehead. The man immediately ran towards her to swallow her in the tightest hug he had ever given her.
"You're alive. I thought you would be dead by now," he whispered, his palm pressing into the back of her head desperately.
"Good to know you have faith in me. It took me forever to get away from Lucius. I...I ended things once I realized there was no chance of changing him."
Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted Luna kneeling next to a fallen witch who laid on top of one of the white hospital cots. The blonde girl was trembling as tears flooded from her crystal eyes, her delicate hand holding on to the unmoving girl. Just Katherine moved forward curiously to get a closer look, McGonagall immediately stepped in front of her to block her path.
"I wouldn't go there if I were you," she warned, her hand pressing ever so slightly against Katherine's chest. She tried to get past her old professor in protest, gripping the elder witch's wrist.
"Who is it, Minerva? Who is Luna sitting next to?" McGonagall eventually took Katherine's hand in hers leading her to the cot, her eyes immediately meeting the body before her.
All she could muster was a scream.
In the blink of an eye
I can see through your eyes
As I'm lying awake I'm still hearing the cries
And it hurts
Hurts me so bad