SUMMARY OF CHAPTER THIRTY IF YOU CHOSE NOT TO READ DUE TO THE TRIGGER WARNING:
Two weeks have passed since Bong Soon's accident, and she has finally begin to process the state of her mental health. In her realization that she had been suicidal and not even had a proper grasp on it, she becomes scared to operate—if she cannot trust herself to save herself, how can she save someone else? Dr. Jeon has been trying to get her into the OR for weeks, but she continually makes excuses to avoid facing her fear. Finally, though, she is forced to reckon with surgery, and is terrified, but Dr. Jeon talks her through the procedure, calms her down, and lets her observe. At the end, Bong Soon feels relieved and happy, but Dr. Jeon confronts her about why she lied to him to get out of surgery. She finally comes clean about her feelings, but facing and conquering surgery gave her a wake up call about her greater purpose. He reminds her that if she wants him to be there for her, she has to communicate with him when she feels that way, and he can help her get help.
There's nothing worse than working the afternoon after a night shift. Four hours of sleep simply are not enough for any functional human being, let alone someone being trusted to cut open real, live human bodies. Waking up feels like you never truly went to sleep in the first place, and the lumpy on-call room beds are the perfect place to form kinks in your spine. As uncomfortable as the bed is, getting out of it is the last thing I want to do right now.
Yet, my buzzing pager does not care what I want to do. I groan, and roll over to reach for the nightside table I put it on before I collapsed into bed. When my hand reaches out, though, it collides clumsily with a warm chest. My tired eyes fly wide open and come face to face with a snoring Kim Taehyung, his arm slung haphazardly over my waist. My groggy brain reminds me that my best friend has to hug something to fall asleep, and that it looks like that something was me.
"Tae." I mumble out, squirming under the dead weight of his limp arm as our pagers continue to buzz obnoxiously. "Taehyung. Tae." I try again, but he doesn't budge. I sigh and clap my hand against his face in one firm slap. The man's eyes open slowly, and my hand is still on his cheek.
"Are we about to kiss right now?" He teases, a humorous smirk growing on his lips. I scoff and push him away by his face. The man finally rouses enough to sit up, rubbing his tired eyes. How he stays so sharp witted while quite literally half asleep is beyond me, considering I have the intellectual capacity of a butternut squash right now. Either way, I climb over him to stand up, stretching my sore body.
"You watch too much TikTok." I reply, silencing both of our pagers before picking mine up to read the message. Taehyung has recently discovered TikTok in his free time, and he sends me many videos on our days off of his own dance videos and other ones he finds amusing. "You went from sleeping harder than a sack of rocks to quoting TikToks at me."
"Well, duh. The Tok is a lifestyle." He says, and I can't help but laugh a bit at that one as I toss him his pager.
"I'm gonna pretend you didn't just call it 'The Tok.'" I say, and Taehyung chuckles. We pause as we both skim the words on the tiny screen. "'Be in the main lobby of the surgical floor at 10:30 to give a warm welcome to a special guest, followed by rounds - Jeon.'" I read aloud, my brows furrowed.
"Special guest?" Taehyung echoes, standing up and rolling his neck. I wrinkle my nose in distaste as his vertebrae crack obnoxiously. "Who?"
"How would I know? Didn't say." I shrug, walking over to the shelves to get some fresh scrubs. I toss Taehyung his size before picking out my own light blue set.
"Dunno, figured I'd ask you since you're...tight with the very neuro god who summoned us with the page." Taehyung says, and I roll my eyes, particularly at his word choice. Tae isn't wrong, Dr. Jeon and I have been getting closer lately. Ever since last week's surgery, we've been finding discreet ways to spend time together. It has been hard due to my demanding intern schedule, but I ate lunch with him on a bench in the far end of the ambulance bay twice this week. We're set up right next to the dumpsters that mildly stink of tuna, but it's a blessing and a curse—it smells awful, but no one wants to come back there, so no one will see us alone and question anything.
"Hate to disappoint, but Jungkook's very intent on not giving me special treatment." I inform him, and Taehyung just pulls off his shirt with a melodramatic sigh.
"I don't know, Bong. If shacking up with Jungkook isn't considered special treatment, I don't know what is." Taehyung wiggles his eyebrows at me, and I blush uncontrollably. That only makes my best friend laugh harder, but I can't help it.
"We're not shacking up! We're taking things slow." I say, and saying the words aloud brings a fond smile to my lips as I pull on my scrub pants. I had been so afraid that Jungkook wouldn't want to go slowly, but when I asked, he abided willingly. I haven't kissed him since after our surgery on the GSW, and even then, the kiss was purely innocent. We've been taking the time to truly, properly get to know each other, and it has been amazing.
"Oh, that's right, I forgot. You're courting." Taehyung teases me, and I don't have time to defend myself before he's making an obscene fake-puking noise. "It's disgusting, if you ask me. First, I played messenger for him. Then, you start eating lunch next to the dumpsters, which really sets the ambience. Next thing you know, he'll start drooling at the sight of an exposed ankle like a Victorian woman. If I have to witness that, I might hurl all over your ugly shoes." He rants, before pausing in tying his shoe.
"You done?" I ask him, and he scowls, resuming tying the laces. Though I his words are dramatic and harsh, I don't take them seriously. I know he doesn't truly mean them.
"Yeah, I just realized my bitterness is showing. God, Min Yoongi fucked me up real good, and not in the way I wanted him to. I used to be so fun and supportive, but now I'm the bitter best friend whose gag reflex is triggered by the sight of your stable, functional relationship. I didn't even have a gag reflex before Min Yoongi!" Taehyung exclaims. "I hate that man." He declares, but he says it without the conviction he normally displays in everything he says and does. He says it wistfully, as if he wishes he could make himself hate Yoongi, but can't.
"Well, if it makes you feel any better, he'll be gone for the next week." I inform Taehyung, and he looks up at me with wide eyes.
"Seriously? Why?" He asks.
"He didn't say, he just asked Jimin, Hoseok and I to cover his shifts. That's why I'm here and not asleep at home, I'm covering his stupid shift." I explain, and Taehyung frowns.
"He didn't tell me he was leaving. And, he didn't ask me to cover him, either." Taehyung says, dismay in his voice.
"Well, would you have said yes?"
"No! Of course not! I don't owe him any favors!" Taehyung replies, pinning one of his cute pins to his scrub pocket. I toss my hair up into a pony tail and put on my white coat.
"Well, he probably knew you'd say that, y'know." I remind Taehyung gently.
"Yeah, ugh...you're right. But him asking me and getting to tell him no to his face still would have been nice." He sighs, fixing his honey blonde hair in the mirror. I manage a small smile and connect eyes with him in the glass empathetically. Taehyung is so incredibly confident and sure of himself, but it's clear that Yoongi has made him question himself more than ever. Tae is used to commanding the power of a room, but Yoongi makes him feel powerless.
"C'mon, Tae. Let's go see our special guest." I say, and he nods, squaring his broad shoulders and putting on his powerful aura that he always has.
"I hope it's not someone dumb." He murmurs to me as we make our way to the lobby. There's already a crowd formed, and we're fashionably late, as Taehyung calls it. We spy Hoseok and Jimin near the back, and begin to approach them. "Watch it be the the guy who invented colostomy bags or something stupid like that." He snickers to himself.
"Don't worry, that guy is definitely super dead." I assure him, and right as Taehyung opens his mouth to call out to Hoseok and Jimin, there's someone intercepting us. I look up at the smiling Dr. Jeon, who holds two cups of coffee in his hand.
"Good morning, Dr. Moon." He says, and though his words are professional, there's a sparkle in his eyes that makes me swoon. He presses a cup of coffee into my hands, and it's still hot, but it doesn't warm me up in the way Dr. Jeon's fingers lingering on my own does. "Dr. Kim." He greets Taehyung as well. Taehyung merely takes the other cup from his hand.
"Why, thank you, Dr. Jeon. How generous!" He says, and takes a long sip. Jungkook just blinks at him. Taehyung offers me a peace sign in farewell and walks over to our other friends.
"That was my coffee." Jungkook deadpans, and I chuckle a bit at the subtle pout on his lips.
"Hey, just be happy he didn't throw up on my shoes." I blurt out, and Jungkook raises a quizzical brow at me. "Don't ask."
"Noted." He laughs softly, brushing a strand of his shiny black hair behind his ear. "How'd you sleep?"
"The better question would be if I slept at all. I feel like I took a really long blink and then my pager was going off to wake me up." I say, and Jungkook hums in understanding.
"Yeah, you're right. Your dark circles really tell the story for you." Jungkook explains, and I squint at him in response. "In a really, um, cute way! Like a...baby raccoon! Y'know, since they have the dark patches around their eyes—"
"You're making it worse. Please stop talking." I instruct him bluntly, and he nods, smiling a bit despite the scolding.
"You're very grumpy today, but I have a feeling I have a surprise that will cheer you up." He informs me matter-of-factly. That smug smile is on his face, the one he always wears when he knows something I don't.
"What is it? Does is have something to do with the special guest?" I ask, and he grins at me affectionately. Anyone who doesn't know us would assume we're having a completely appropriate conversation between colleagues, but Jungkook's glinting obsidian irises and the dimple that indents his cheek say otherwise.
"Good guess. She's got something to do with it, but you'll just have to wait and see,
won't you?" He says, and I roll my eyes, but he knows I don't mean it from the involuntary smile on my lips.
"I hate surprises, Jungkook. You should know that for future reference if we're going to be together."
"Oh, I like the sound of that. A future together." He states offhandedly, and I stumble over my next words, flushing unbearably red. His smile only widens. He goes from the worst flirt ever to the smoothest, and I can hardly keep up.
"Jungkoo—you, um,—I—you're so—" I stammer oh so eloquently, but then he's hushing me and pointing to the top of the steps in the lobby, where the Chief stands.
"Shh. Your surprise is gonna speak." He whispers, and surely enough, the Chief opens his mouth.
"Good morning, everyone. Thank you all for being so punctual to the page, we know it was short notice, but Dr. Jeon and I thought it would be a nice surprise to reward you all for all your hard work. You're officially almost halfway through your surgical internship." Seokjin announces to the almost silent room. A few people cheer in response to his final words, but with a single smile and a look in his eye, the Chief quiets them down. "Without any further adieu, I'd like to introduce you all to our special guest. Give a warm SNUH welcome to Dr. Yang Miju." I immediately gasp and clap my hands together, looking up at Jungkook in excitement. Yang Miju is one of the best oncologists in the country, and went abroad for research for less invasive forms of treatment. She's a legend. Jungkook merely sends me a wink.
"Oh, my God." I hear a voice that stands out from the loud applause, a bit to the left of us. What sets it apart is the complete lack of enthusiasm, a polar opposite to the rest of the room. When I discern the owner of the familiar voice, concern wells in the pit if my stomach. Hoseok, the constantly happy, optimistic, sunshine-y Hoseok, is pale with shock and there's not even a hint of his blindingly bright, contagious smile on his face. I glance up to Jungkook, who also saw Hoseok. He merely nods in understanding, and I squeeze his hand discreetly before making a beeline for Hoseok.
"Hey, hey, hey..." I rush out softly, trying not to draw any attention to him apart from me, Jimin, and Taehyung, who are also looking on worriedly. I grab Hoseok's hands in my own and squeeze hard, trying to pull him back down to earth from wherever he is in his mind. Hoseok has been my rock in my hard situations, and I'll be his no matter what is bothering him. "What's the matter?"
"It's my mom." He says softly, and I furrow my eyebrows at him.
"What about your mom, Seokie?" Jimin asks, his voice calm and comforting to temper Hoseok's growing despair.
"Nonono, that—" Hoseok stops to point up at the top of the stairs. We follow his shaking finger to Yang Miju. "That's my mom."
My jaw drops as I connect the dots, and I vividly recall the first day of our internship:
"I forgot I had a Jung. How's your mother?" He asks. The rest of us raise our eyebrows in confusion, and Hoseok sighs. He clearly doesn't want to talk about his mother, but he does anyways.
"She's well, sir." Hoseok answers. Dr. Jeon hums in answer, nodding.
"Still out in the States for cancer research?" He asks. Hoseok nods. "Ah. Did she tell you I'm one of her favorite students?" He grinned.
"No, she didn't, sir." Hoseok replies.
"You seem upset, Dr. Jung. Why is that?" Dr. Jeon asks.
"I'd rather not say, sir." Hoseok says.
"Is it because you and your mother don't speak much?" Dr. Jeon asks nonchalantly, but the matter clearly isn't so light to Hoseok. His eyes snap up, and he squints at Dr. Jeon.
"How do you know—"
"Your mother and I are in very close correspondence, Dr. Jung. In fact, she called me a few weeks ago when the internships were announced. Now that I think of it, she did mention her son. Said she was concerned for him. Didn't think he was ready." Dr. Jeon says, and I see Taehyung's eyes narrow at our mentor. I know he's itching to say something in Hoseok's defense as much as I am, that anger is burning in the pit of his stomach as much as it is mine.
"Sir," Hoseok swallows, and I can see his hands shaking ever so slightly as he wrings them under the table. "I can guarantee you that I'm ready. I was number two in my class at Yonsei, I—"
"Oh, that's a tad underwhelming, don't you think? Considering your mother was number one in her day?" He interrupts Hoseok, who shuts his mouth in utter defeat. To my surprise, Yoongi, who I have never seen have an ounce of empathy in him, reaches over and lays his hand on top of Hoseok's trembling ones. "Call your mother, Dr. Jung. Once she says you're ready, I'll get you in the operating room. I trust her judgement more than my own. Until then, you're benched. Understood?"
"My mom's here." Hoseok repeats again, as if unable to process this fact. Before we can say anything else, Hoseok's mother speaks.
"Hello, everyone. Thank you for such a warm welcome. I'm very jetlagged, but that woke me right up!" She charms the crowd, and I immediately see where Hoseok gets his infectious smile.
"This cannot be happening." Hoseok murmurs as she bathes in the crowd's laughter for a moment. I don't know how to help him, so I just squeeze his hand hard.
"I'm glad to be here at SNU. It's one of the finest hospitals with the finest doctors in the world. I'm excited to be back, and I know you're all excited to see me, but I do ask you to refrain from approaching me for a few days. I have a very high pressure surgery to perform, which you will all be able to witness from the gallery should you choose. After that surgery, though, I am all yours! I'll be teaching a lab in a few days and will be doing a book signing as well! I can't wait to meet all of you! Now, that said, would Dr. Jeon Jungkook, Dr. Moon Bong Soon, and Dr. Jung Hoseok report to me? Thank you!"
Hoseok and I share a look, my heart sinking to the pit of my stomach. Taehyung sighs softly next to us, and I can tell through the look he sends me that he's thinking one thing: No special treatment, huh?
I thought nothing could be worse than waking up for an afternoon shift after a night shift. I was very, very wrong.
heyyy y'all!!! i'm so excited about this new plotline!!! you'll really get to know the other characters better!!!
hope you enjoyed & lmk your thoughts!
<3, r