Daisies

-8-

Though, you weren't really allowed to yell or talk in the library anyways, so he was more than happy with getting to watch Junho studying.

The brunette's delicate hands hovered across the paper with a pen like a weapon, Junho quickly scribbling down more and more letters that was just typical him.

Hyeongjun hadn't even realized his thoughts until now, going entirely red and tearing his gaze away from the older in an attempt to protect himself.

Protect his heart from hurting more than it already did.

A little bit too late, though.

He couldn't help but to adore the older. It's like he paid more attention to Junho now, finding out so many new things about the brunette, things he never knew about.

All those cute little habits that followed him into his slumber at night, Junho's eyes making him freeze whenever they made contact with his own. Without realizing it himself, he had already been pulled deep down into a pit of mixed emotions and darkness.

Happiness and....sadness? Pain? Guilt? Anger?

He couldn't sort it out anymore. Hyeongjun didn't want to.

It was too hard to even try.

"Y-yah, Hyeongjun! Why are you staring at me like that?" The older flushed under his gaze, Hyeongjun himself started blushing as he realized he had been caught.

But Junho's reaction was so worth it. That small stutter and the flush that tinted his cheeks so prettily...

So adorable.

He just smiled at the brunette, making Junho stutter even more before turning his eyes down into his assignment. Trying to hide the way he swallowed nervously, Hyeongjun bit the inside of his cheek to stop the sigh and decided upon hiding behind a book.

As if not seeing Junho would make this warm feeling go away.

He was struck by a sense of sadness, closing his eyes swiftly as a memory of them flashed by in his head.

It felt just like before, but not really.

They used to study together in the library once in a while, Hyeongjun insisting on calling it study dates while Junho giggled and willingly got dragged there with him.

What if he had seen the tired expression sweeping by the older's face? Even if it was fast, barely noticeable, what if he had seen it?

What if he had seen how Junho clutched his shirt tightly, nails digging into his palm enough to leave marks?

He hadn't.

Hyeongjun was tired of being in denial.

He's very much aware of the things happening around them. Why they are all acting like this, why he is acting like this.

He may be very oblivious about Junho's unrequited love, but his own was hard to ignore.

They just chose to come at the wrong time, in the wrong place.

There was nothing he could do about it, nothing he could change or take back. As much as he hated to admit it, he must face the truth.

It was getting harder and harder to talk about it at all. He had done it with his boyfriend, but he never wanted to visit a hospital ever again.

They constantly reminded him of Junho's blood, Junho's too pale face, Junho's body cramping and shaking as daisies spouted out of his mouth, coloring the floor in a sea of white and crimson.