Dramione Collaboration

The First Kiss

She shrugged and looked wistful. "Even being Head Girl. I wanted to be Head Girl from the first time I read about it in Hogwarts: A History — but when the Board of Governors asked me, it wasn't because of my academic record. They said it was because they needed a role model for the school, someone with 'unquestionable integrity' — " she gave a forced laugh, " — to lead the school by demonstrating what forgiveness and moving forward means. So — that's why I got it."

Draco's mouth went dry and his hands clenched as he stood, gripping the curtain and absorbing what she'd said.

It had been a shock to everyone, Draco included, when he'd been given the position of Head Boy. He arrived at King's Cross Station in a state of dread, but Granger had taken it in stride from their first meeting. She volunteered them for the first patrol on the Hogwarts Express, and moved through the train introducing them as the Head Student team to the students in every compartment.

Now, four months later, she was explaining why.

Their "partnership" was an act.

Of course it was.

She'd been given the job of leading by example by having to pretend to forgive the classmate who'd watched as she was tortured in his home's drawing-room.

No one was that forgiving.

Draco was delusional to have thought anyone possibly could be.

Here he'd been behaving like an idiot in a daydream charm, while she was spending her school year pretending she wasn't living a full-time nightmare.

It was like a cavern had been carved into the centre of his chest as he stood staring down at her.

"Granger — " he finally forced himself to say, trying to keep his voice level. "You don't have to forgive me."

Her head jerked and she looked sharply at him. His stomach clenched, and it felt as though his chest was being crushed.

He squared his shoulders, trying to appear indifferent.

"I realise we have to work together as Head Boy and Girl," he said, "but in private, when we're off duty, there's no need to continue acting like you've forgiven me. I'll understand."

She stared at him and his stomach twisted into a painful knot as he watched her, waiting for the mask fall off.

He'd just avoid her.

For the rest of the school year.

He would just leave her alone. They could alternate office hours to minimize contact. It wasn't as though he needed to be in the office whenever she was, it had just been — a habit to always be with her.

"I do forgive you," she said.

Draco blinked and swallowed. "No. It's fine. I mean it. You don't need to act like you have. I'd prefer it if you didn't."

He'd already had his entire life and belief system smashed to pieces twice in the last year. He may as well round that out by having his lifeline turn out to be a lie too.

The pain in his chest was beginning to stab and the sense of horror curdling in his gut was reminiscent of many occasions during the last several years where time seemed to slow until the seconds were crawling past and he stood helplessly frozen in place.

His entire future suddenly felt narrowed and elongated into something endless and colourless.

He was Draco Malfoy. The youngest Death Eater in history. It was going be the only identity he'd have for as long as he lived.