Down For The Count

I'm Not Okay

Lin frowned, my shivering not having gone unnoticed by him. "Are you cold?"

I slowly nodded, wrapping my arms around me to try and regain some sort of warmth from my body heat.

Lin only looked at me, seeming very concerned, and I wasn't sure why.

"What?"

"It's 80 degrees in June. I'm wearing a t-shirt and I'm still hot...are you really cold?" He asked. I only shrugged.

"It's not a big deal." I said as I walked past him towards the theatre.

"No, that's...that's kind of a big deal." I heard him say from behind me. I sighed, stopping once I got to the stage door and waiting for him to unlock it.

He reached over, putting his hand up to my forehead and frowning. "Why are you so cold? Do you feel sick?"

"I feel fine. Can we please go in?"

Lin still looked very concerned, and I felt a little alarmed myself.

Is it really 80 degrees outside? It feels closer to 40 degrees. It feels like a day in February, not a day in June.

"You haven't gotten sick again or anything, right?"

"Right." I lied right to his face.

Lin still looked deeply troubled, but he didn't press any further on the matter. He unlocked the stage door, pushing it open as we both walked in.

We walked a little bit through various hallways, up various staircases, until we could finally hear people talking.

The first person I saw was Phillipa, and as soon as I saw her I wanted to break down right there.

She gave me a sad smile, walking over and pulling me into a hug, saying nothing.

I relaxed into her hug, feeling a bit better as I closed my eyes.

The atmosphere around us was silent, but that was okay. Silence is okay.

Phillipa pulled away after a bit, giving me a small smile as she wrapped her arm around me and led me toward her dressing room.

As per usual, the girls' dressing room was loud, packed with people all joking around and having fun.

But as soon as Pippa and I made it to the doorway, everyone stopped, all attention focused on me.

"Paisley, hey." Oak said as he stood up. I watched as he came over to me, pulling me into a tight hug like Phillipa. "You doing okay?"

I only shrugged. I feel inclined to always press the fact that I'm fine with Lin and Vanessa, just to make them feel better. But I don't feel the need to fake anything with these people.

"Not really." I whispered, Oak frowning as he pulled away.

"Well...that's okay. You'll get there." He offered me a small smile.

I watched as Thayne walked over, handing me a small card.

"We all signed it." He said happily.