𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐘 - avengers soulmate

006: The first heartbreak

[Warning: This chapter contains death, thoughts on death, negative self talk, and is overall sad]

If you ever told someone there was a time when
Beatrice Rose Jones would be heartbroken they wouldn't believe you, people thought Beatrice was to kind, to pure to deserve the devastation of heartbreak, they were right of course. But sadly the universe didn't see it that way, for Bee will have to deal with several heartbreaks throughout her life, but let's not get ahead of ourselves. Let's start with the first time Beatrice Rose Jones heart broke apart.

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     Beatrice Rose Jones was sitting near the window reading. She would occasionally turn her head to look out the window at the gray sides, the droopy grass covered in old water droplets, the sun seaming to hide away behind the clouds. She had no idea what was about to happen. Perhaps the gloomy day was meant to be a warning for pour Bee, alas we will never know.

      She was waiting for the mail to come, this she did not enjoy for the heart clenching feeling she got when thinking of the bad news that could occupy that envelope. But Bee being Bee decides to not think about that and only think of the positives, like how she might get a card from her beloved soulmates, now that put a smile on her face.

Her attention was taken away from her book when herd the mail falling through the hole in her door. She new she had to get it, the mail. She just didn't want to. She slowly got up from the windowsill and went to the hallway they now fells to stretch for miles to go to the door that now cases fear in her heart. A large pit forming in her stomach.

She slowly reaches for the mail and her small hands grasp the envelopes. She eventually brings herself to look. Bills, bill, advertisement, letter, news, letter from the Military In that moment you could both hear a pin drop and the pounding of Bees heart.

      With shaking hands she brings herself to open the letter inside it reads:

Ms. Beatrice Jones

       With heavy hearts we have to inform you that your soulmate James Barns is missing/presumed dead. We are terribly sorry for your loss.
                                          Condolences,
                                                  Cornell Philips

      With shaking knees Bee falls to the floor, her breathing becomes sloppy and a waterfall of crystal tears fall from her ocean eyes. Her world just came crashing I'm on her. She can move, she can't breathe, she can't think.

You know the moments, the moments in which you are almost numb, For Bee this is one of those moments. She can't bring herself to get up from the ground, tears alumated her eyes like jewels as they fall down her face in mighty waves. She eventually brings herself to think.

Bucky dead?

Yes?

No?

No.

No!

Yes?

Yes.

Bucky dead.

Us alone?

Bucky gone.

Us alone.

Us alone!

All alone.

      Bee was known to be happy but in this movement she was the furthest then to it. Her soulmate, her other part, one of the loves of her life just gone, and she can't do anything about it. In this moment the world came crashing down on pour Bee and her light began to dim.

She couldn't help but be offended. They said there sorry and they give there condolences but they didn't know Bucky, they didn't know how his eyes would light up when someone told him there proud of him, they haven't seen the lazy smile that adores his face when listening to a story, they didn't know anything about him, and yet they say there sorry I'm a printed letter with a few things filled out. It wasn't ok. She wasn't ok.

She roles herself in a ball trying to find some comfort. "Steve" she whispers. The world leaves her mouth like a unachievable wish. It was so quiet you couldn't even be shore she said it. She knows he can't hear her or confert her but she says it anyway. Hopping to feel better in any way.

     Bee can't find comfort. Despite how kind she is she doesn't have really any friends. Some people don't like Steve so intern don't like her. Others judge Bee for her love of massines and science. Bee, Bucky and Steve also try to stay away from others to avoid judgment of all of them being each other's soulmates.

     This usually doesn't bother Bee because she enjoys being alone. It gives her time to think and do what she likes, Bee sometimes even enjoys her soulmates being away, not now though.

     Now all she wants is a hug. She wants someone to comfort her like she does them. She wants someone to be the light to her darkness. She wants to feel loved. She wants someone to tell her it will be ok. But most of all she wants to not feel alone.

With now silent tears replacing a smile on Bees face. Bee believes this to be the worst moment in her life (it's sadly not) Then Bee can't help but think she is being selfish.

Others have faced loss she isn't special. And Steve is probably going through the same thing right now. She needs to stay strong for him, she needs to confert him. Now Bee is worrying about Steve. She wants to make him feel better even though she fells broken, it's just the type of person she is.

Even in heartbeat Bee cares for others more than herself. Be was always a pure soul some thought she was almost unaware of the darkness in the world but right now Bee starts to understand this cruel place. At the same time she doesn't understand what she has done to deserve this.

In this moment Bee the girl sweeter than honey, the light to darkness, the pure soul, the happy girl is anything but happy. This is the start of sadness that will stay in her life for years to come and pour Bee will spend years with one question Why me?

Remember:
"The sweetest honey is loathsome in his own deliciousness."
- William Shakespeare

Hi there,

Well, that was a
Sad chapter

Please remember
that if you
do lose someone
all of your felling are
valid and you
have the right
to greave in
any way. It is
not at all selfish to
be sad.

Thank you
for reading this
chapter I hope you
liked it

I realized it took
me a long time
to write my last
chapter and it wasn't
even good so I
worked hard and
quickly got you
all this chapter I think I
did good on it.

Hope you
have a wonderful
day/night
:)