Fallen Angels: Fallen Book 1 (a Boys of Porn novella)

CH 2

"Um." Derek laughed short. "Forgive my ignorance, but who in their right mind would agree to that? Sex is a vital part of marriage."

Patrick pressed his lips tight and messed with the stacked literature. "Typically, Side B Christians marry other Side B Christians, so they're on the same page. And sometimes..." He shrugged. "Sometimes emotional love is enough to sustain a couple, without the physical aspect, even if one of them isn't against sex. True love surpasses sex."

Did I enter the Twilight Zone? Derek couldn't wrap his mind around this thought process. "I can't imagine not making love to my husband. It seems so..." He smiled. "... unnatural. But, hey, to each his own." He cleared his throat. "But can I ask why they choose to be celibate?"

Patrick moved away, his back to Derek. "Because, though they believe it's okay to identify as gay... it's still wrong to engage in a sexual relationship. God doesn't condemn or judge us for who we are, but how we conduct ourselves."

Reality set in. He's Side B.

Derek didn't ask for confirmation. Maybe he didn't want to know. Something had clicked between him and Patrick—he was sure of it. But if Patrick was Side B... they had nowhere to go.

Fuck. Derek was out of his element. His world revolved around sex. Without sex, his world wouldn't even exist. It was his turn to suffer nervous anxiety. He shifted in place, at a loss for words.

Patrick immediately picked up on his unease—and reflected the same. He absently messed with a stack of buttons. "I-I don't know where Brian is," he mumbled. "He should be here."

Derek cleared his throat. "Maybe he had to use the restroom," he murmured as his eyes darted out into the crowded street. Now he was the one eager to flee. "You know, I... I should probably get back, too." Please don't ask me about my exhibit.

"Oh. Yeah. Of course." Patrick kept his eyes turned away from Derek.

"It... it was nice meeting you." Derek fumbled with his words.

"You, too." Patrick stood with his back partially toward Derek, his shoulders tense.

Was he waiting to see if Derek would mention their upcoming date? Should he mention it? He was suddenly confused about going out with Patrick. If they wouldn't have sex—ever—then Derek didn't see the point. He was honest enough with himself to admit that he needed a sexual relationship—even if it wasn't only about sex. Why had Patrick even agreed to go out with him?

Breathing deep, Patrick turned around. "You should probably get back." He forced himself to meet Derek's eyes.

We could've had so much fun together. The disappointment was nearly crushing and it troubled Derek that it was so powerful this soon. Patrick was just another cute gay boy—there were plenty of them on the streets today.

"Yeah," Derek mumbled. "I guess I should."

His departure felt awkward and... depressing.

Walking away, he forced himself to look straight ahead and not back as he felt Patrick's eyes on him. It wasn't easy—to not look back. To not go back and confirm their date. But there would be no date. He knew it. Patrick knew it.

Did I just wound a kind soul?

. . .

"Hey, you're back. What took you so long?" Brian lightly smacked Patrick on the back. "Get lost? Or did someone try to steal you?" He grinned. "I knew it probably wasn't a good idea to bring your cute self to an event like this."