chaos theory | a spencer reid fanfiction

twenty one.

WARNING
This chapter contains mentions of abuse, sexual assault, and kidnapping. This chapter is skippable if these things trigger or disturb you in any way.
PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE READING if you don't handle these topics well.

!!!! will indicate when the potentially triggering content will appear. again I say, please be wary of what you read, in case it triggers something.
(please read authors note at the end)

Spencer didn't sleep that night, considering he really couldn't. He had messed things up with you again, and this time there was no fixing it. Everything seemed and felt so hopeless.

He rolled over in the bed, overcome with a sense of cold and loneliness. He'd never been bothered by an empty bed before, and quite frankly he didn't know why he was so bothered by it now. He rubbed his red eyes and stood up, turning on the shower.
He turned the water on so hot it burned his skin in some desperate attempt to feel more than numb. He let the water run down his face while his hands stayed on the wall, his eyes closed as the water stung them when it dripped from his hair. He hit the wall, cracking one of the tiles.
He lazily dried himself off after turning off the water, reluctantly getting out of the warm atmosphere of the shower. He didn't bother to clear the mirror of the fog, just staring into a blurry reflection of what was supposed to be his face. He finally finished getting dressed and walked away.

His clothes were slapped onto his body sloppily, hanging limply from his arms with his belt not quite done all the way. He didn't bother with breakfast, just grabbed his bag and left out the door.
He walked down to the metro station, noticing the construction signs and tape that hung over the wet cement. He turned down an alleyway, lightened by the bright sun overhead. He walked past a dumpster, an old and dirty purse pushed haphazardly underneath it. He just kept on walking.

He finally got to the metro stop, finding the smallest and emptiest car he could find and climbing in. He sat in the back, not meeting the eyes of any of the other passengers. He just stared out the window at the crumbling stone walls passing in front of his eyes.
He made his way up to the BAU offices with a pit in his stomach, considering calling off work today. But things would look wrong if you both called off, so he decided against it, knowing you would. When he walked in, Garcia stopped him.

"Hey, have you seen Y/N today? I haven't seen her around the office this morning and she didn't call in sick."
Huh, strange.
"She's probably just having an off day, I know she hasn't been feeling well lately. I wouldn't worry about it."

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Your eyes fluttered awake as you woke up, overcome with the smell of bleach and laundry detergent. Cheap cologne wafted from the open bathroom door, the sound of water shutting off sounding through the gap. The room was dark, blackout curtains covering the large windows on the wall in front of you. You could see the tops of the other high rises through the gaps in the curtains, telling you that you were most likely in the penthouse suite of an apartment building.
You tried to move your hand to the back of your head only to find you were tied to the headboard of a large king sized bed, plush sheets under your legs. You struggled against the bindings, kicking your legs to hopefully loosen the knots.

"Come on now, sweetheart. Stop that, you'll ruin the clean sheets." His figure came through the doorway, a white towel over his bottom half and another drying his hair.
"Fuck off, Nathan." To that he just laughed.
"Now that's no way to talk to your boyfriend, is it?"
"You're not my boyfriend. I made that very clear when I left."
"No, what you made clear was that you aren't a very good listener." His face grew serious, coming closer to you. "I told you that nobody would get to have you. And what do you do? Go and run off to Virginia with some new boy toy. I shouldn't be surprised, considering how much you whored around before you met me." The words still stung you, even though you knew they shouldn't. They were all just his desperate attempts to make you upset.
"Please, just let me go." You struggled against the bindings again, trying to loosen the ties. Nathan grabbed your wrist tight, giving you a warning look.
"No." You kept struggling, stopping once his hand came into contact with your cheek. You felt the sting as he hit you so hard your head hit the pillow, making you gasp out. "I'm not gonna let you go. You know why?" You glared at him, trying to hold back the tears that formed in your eyes. "Because I love you."