Red (The Hobbit Fan Fiction)

Bonus Chapter - "If Only Things Had Been Different."

**I'll go into a longer explanation in an author's note after this, but the title should be a little self explanatory. Enjoy. Also, try the song with the chapter. It's no Lord of the Rings/Hobbit music, but I think it fits nicely enough.**

“If Only Things Had Been Different.”

I was beginning to regret forcing myself to join the hunting party that was supposed to take out Azog. I didn’t regret it in the beginning, not when my veins had been full of fire. I didn’t regret it when I slew Orcs.

I did begin to regret it, however, when I lost one of my best friends.

Fili, Kili, and I had been sent out to scout. We’d come up empty after riding up to confront the pale Orc. We’d been met with some of his minions, but they were hardly competition. It was Fili’s “genius” plan for us to split up, which I had repeatedly said wasn’t a good idea. I might as well have been talking to a wall. I ended up being with Kili while his brother went another way.

Our scouting didn’t seem to matter, we’d fallen right into a trap set by Azog himself. Of course, I had had my suspicions when I heard deep rumbling around where we were. Kili and I had been looking out from one of the various holes in the area.

We hadn’t known what happened until the body fell before us. We hadn’t known he’d been captured and slaughtered so close to us. Now, he was sprawled out in the snow, eyes glazed and unblinking. This was why I wanted us to remain together, to prevent this from happening.

I used the wall for support, shaking with sobs. I couldn’t look at the body anymore; I feared I was on the verge of vomiting. Neither Kili nor I screamed; we took the pain of his death in silence. I lost a best friend, Kili lost his brother. This isn’t fair.

I knew what Kili was going to do next, it wasn’t hard to figure out. I was glad he could get past his emotions, mine were currently weighing me down. Kili slowly backed inside with me, I watched him with careful brown eyes.

I could see the tears shining in his eyes; he was holding back so hard. I knew this hurt him more than it hurt me. I couldn’t imagine how he felt now. He’d lost his brother, someone who was always at his side. Now, Fili was gone. Kili and I were the only two left in our scout party.

We had to be next.

With trembling hands, I took out my newly acquired sword that I had gotten back in Laketown. I did some deep breaths, trying to get past my hysteria. I felt numb with grief. But it couldn’t keep us here right now. We were still in a war, a war that was far from over.

Kili wasn’t going to fight the Orcs alone, I would stand by him. He needed someone right now, more than ever.

He turned to me, our eyes met. His dropped down temporarily to the sword at my side. I knew my eyes tricked me into thinking he cracked a smile at my appearance: my red hair all dirty and knotted, my body that hadn’t been scrubbed recently, my torn, tight-fitting attire. I looked like someone who lived in the Wild since birth. I looked far from the Hobbit he’d met at Bag End on that fateful night, just like he was no longer the Dwarf I had first met on that night.

Time had changed us.

“I’m with you,” I said quietly. I wasn’t terrified that we were going to be next to be murdered, it was a fact. This was nothing compared to what we endured: Smaug destroying Laketown, the goblins, the spiders, Gollum and his riddles (more so my experience than Kili’s), the Trolls, the past encounters with Orcs. All our prior experiences built us up for this moment.

I just didn’t expect to be tossed into a war of all things.

Kili took out his own sword and smiled grimly at me.