Death by a Thousand Cuts | Rosalie Hale

Chapter 4: Deep talks

"Honey" she patted my head "I am here every step of the way"

She kissed the top of my head, I looked at her letting all my insecurities show.

"What if he does not approve?" my lips trembled and tears started forming in my eyes "What if he wants me gone? If he sends me back to Renee? I can't go back living with her, I cannot leave you"

"You are not going anywhere" she stated firmly and calm "If he wants you gone then you come and live with me"

I gasped.

"Living together?" my heart pounded loudly in my chest, but not out of fear or distress but with a stronger feeling, hope "Renee won't have any of that and I am still underage"

"We can run away, they will never find us" she replied as if it was that simple "We can go to Europe backpacking or buy a cottage in Canada, we have the money and the means to just disappear, they will never find us"

"What about my education? I need a high school diploma if I want to go to college" I frowned, it was a tempting idea but I could not picture leaving my sister, Charlie or Leah behind just like that.

"You are already smart enough to be in college, so we will forge one" she put both of her hands in my face "You do not need to worry about anything, just say yes"

Hope was filling my hope but there was also a thorn there, a thorn I had been trying to ignore but now that she was talking about living together or running away, I had to acknowledge.

"What will happen in 10 years or 20?" I held back a sob.

Right now, running away sounded like a good idea. However, we could not plan that much a head when we hadn't even talked about the basics. For example, what will happen when I am older than Rosalie? When I no longer look like her girlfriend but more like her mother?

"We will still be together" she replied solemnly.

"Even when I no longer look like your girlfriend but more like your mother?" I pointed out, wiping a tear off. Rosalie's face crumbled in pain.

"We can figure that out later" she tried to dismiss the subject but I knew that we couldn't. It was time.

I turned so I was lying flat on top of her, crossing my arms above her chest and resting my head on top of them so I was directly staring into her eyes. Before I could think that I was overstepping her boundaries, she hugged my waist to her body to prevent me from moving.

"Where do you see yourself in 15 years, Rosalie?" my voice was full of sorrow, it pained me to think of a future where she was gone.

"With you" was her quick answer "Living on our own in a cottage or an apartment, making breakfast for you and kissing you goodbye as you leave for work and welcoming you back at night with dinner"

I smiled, teary eyed, to her dreams that I also longed for, but there was a huge hole in her words.

"And what would you be doing while I go to work?" I questioned softly, not giving her time to answer me I added "Going to high school?"

Rosalie closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath, I felt my heart pang.

"I can pose as someone older, perhaps 23" she finally opened her eyes, they were glossy.

"Not for long" my voice was barely a whisper but I knew she could hear me and thank god for that because I did not think I was able to speak any louder without breaking into tears "Besides I will be 30"

She stared at my eyes looking for something I did not recognize.

"What are you trying to imply?" her voice suddenly became harsh; goosebumps went down my spine.