Trapped in History

1

That alone should stop any regrets that he may have towards himself for not abiding by his father, should stop any desire for approval right in its tracks. After all, the best way to torment and force the hand of a ShadowHunter was by threatening their parabatai, it was just...what sort of cruel demon would do such a thing? Well, Jace knew the answers to that now. His father was little more than a Demon playing at an angel in all but blood.

 Just the thought that Alec could feel...even a tiny amount of what he was feeling was hurtful. The realization that Alec would know. His father was never quite the nicest person, but Alec had never had proof of his suspicions either, something which clearly was not...not the case anymore. Which was yet another thing that hurt him. He knew that Alec would feel betrayed that he had not said anything. Though, he did not doubt that the other had his own guesses about what his relationship with his father was like, but it had never been confirmed before. needless to say the constant pain that Jace was in, knowing that Alec could feel the same, it would demolish any question of such a thing. 

Jace could feel himself loosing consciousness, ever so slowly. Still he fought to stay awake. He did not really know why. He just got the feeling that it was an unwise choice, then again...most of his choices had been ripped from him the moment that he had stepped on this ship. Even now, in this simple thing, he could feel his body betraying him. For some reason, he was still having trouble sleeping and yet sleeping so often. Not that he slept much before, but his father had taken to waking him in varying cruel ways, and he hated it.  Hated the vulnerability forced upon him. Yet what choice did he have but to merely endure it? 

When Jace woke the next moment, not realizing that he had even slipped into rest, he was still hanging, his wrists aching from the weight that had been played on them. He tilted his head up to the ceiling staring at where the ropes connected to the partition above him. He wondered how long he had been asleep, but it was useless to contemplate such things, as he had no way to truly know. He could not trust anyone to be honest with him here after all.

He sighed, pulled himself together little by little, knowing that he would have to do something. Experimentally, he tugged lightly at the ropes binding his wrists, wincing as he did so, eyes glazing over, vision fading in and out as he did so, around the room. His eyes gazed upon his father...

...and the man he had in his arms, wrestled, tied, and held at knife point. His breath caught instantly and he could see that his Father realized that he had gotten to him finally. There was that ever familiar gleam in his eyes, where Valentine knows that he has won, and is just taking on formalities. Jace's own eyes widened, panic flaring through him instantly, wrenching at his bonds, trying to free himself. It took but one light increase of pressure and a tsk of his father and Jace froze, body trembling.

"Now, I would not do that, Jonathon" His father said, voice painfully sweet, almost like liquid honey. He could not take the time to appreciate it, though, worry still flying through him. Jace glared at his father, body stiff from fear and anger at the situation he was now forced into. He had hoped that Alec would not try and follow him, or find him. That he would remain safe within the Institute, but of course he would not. Jace really should not have thought that he would. "We wouldn't want to hurt this precious little ShadowHunter now would we?"  Valentine questioned, his voice still deceptively light. 

Jace's eyes tracked the blade, which his father teasingly traced down Alec's neck. "Why..."

"I would chose your next words very carefully, Son." Valentine said, staring at Jace, face impassive. Jace swallowed. He could feel the panic continuing to grow. It was clouding his vision. He felt...dizzy. Unable to breathe, as though someone were physically choking him, cutting him from his air. He could not get his breaths in, could not force air down his lungs, panic constricting him. "Nothing to say? Interesting. You certainly had no problem earlier."  He tried to speak, tried to say anything. Would do anything, just to get the silver away from Alec, but for some reason his words were not forming. They could not be forced out of his mind. He could only panic, unable to breathe. His father scoffed. "Perhaps a bit of incentive?" He asked, raising an eyebrow, eyes dark with excitement. 

Sick, he is definitely a sick bastard. Jace thought to himself, his eyes carefully tracking as it happened, anger and fury flooding through his body, his eyes glinting with pure gold.

Jace would not be able to give an exact account of what happened next, and the last thing he could clearly recall would be his father's eyes glinting in victory, and a smirk curling on his lips, but it took less then a moment, a flash of his father pressing the knife just barely deep enough to draw a drop of blood, which ran down Alec's neck, and Jace was there, ripping his Soul-bound brother from his father's hands. 

And in the next they were staring at a field. Grass swaying in the breeze. Alec stared at him, but Jace could see nothing. His vision faded in, and then out, everything was blurry, and he could not see. He could not hear, or breathe. 

He could not see, hear, he could not breathe, but he could feel. It took a while, he did not know how long but it felt like an eternity, but slowly, he felt tentative hands on his body, flinching....was instinctive. He could not stop it, but when he gazed into warm brown eyes instead of the cold black of his father's his breathing began to slow. Distantly, and then more close, he began to hear the soothing voice of his parabatai. He began to see more then just his brother's eyes, but the rest of him as well, and slowly the world, which had descended and fled him, began to come back into focus.

He launched himself into his Parabatai, who held him carefully, continuing to mutter words softly, and Jace recognized it as the Oath. He could not help the wet laugh that left him, which swiftly turned into gasps as he could not seem to contain the emotions welling in through him. 

"Alec," He breathed the name out, a mere whisper, which traveled, but held the weight of the world. That one word, that one person. Jace did not know, could not comprehend himself without Alec. The world spun to circle around him, and Jace gratefully inhaled the scent of his parabatai, clutched the back of his jacket, as the tears began to fall he hid his face into the neck of him, assuring himself of his living breath. He was alive...

He was alive...

And for the longest time, that was all Jace could focus on, and not the remnants of a battle before hand, and the stares of four curious eyes staring at them.