The Christmas Princess (Princess Diaries Fanfic)

Chapter Eight

Actually, I have never ever had a white Christmas! I mean, I have been spending Christmases in Genovia since like ever, and if Genovia had snow for Christmas, then the global warming would have probably already erased all those little island countries in the Pacific Ocean off the world map. So, excuse me, Lilly, my heart breaks for you because you too have been denied your Michael time, but at least you have SNOW!

And you probably aren't on a forced bed rest with a strong possibility that your brain is bleeding and no one wants to scan your head.

Tuesday, December 24, later

Well, I might be suffering a brain bleed but at least my ankle is doing better. I can actually walk already.

So why am I not allowed to leave my bed again?

René said it is because there are reporters outside the palace and since the whole world thinks I am sick, it wouldn't be good if anyone took a picture of me wandering through royal gardens, because, you know, we can only afford good publicity now that elections are happening.

Especially any bad publicity about me since I am the main cause for the elections in the first place.

Tuesday, December 24, later

I checked my email.

I know I should be the one to tell him that I arrived in Genovia safely (well, but then again if a plane with a Dowager Princess and a Princess of Genovia crashed, it would be all over news so he would know anyway) but I did kind of expect him to at least send me a 'I Love You' email or something. Since, come on, I am with GRANDMERE in GENOVIA doing PRINCESS STUFF. Doesn't he know me well enough to realize that I need any help I can get to survive this?

Or am I again losing myself in stupid fairytales I tend to write in my head? I am crushed every time I realize they are just that – fairytales. They aren't real and they do not happen. This is real life – it is just the opposite of fairytales where everyone suffers in the beginning but is happy in the end. Real life first pampers you and then it breaks you. I know, I have experienced it. Why am I so unable to learn from my past mistakes? It's like I have a memory of a goldfish.

Why am I getting so upset over the lack of emails? THE GUY IS REINVENTING HEART SURGERY AS I WRITE THIS! Why can't I be happy with what I have? If this is a sign of me being a perfectionist, then why can't I be a perfectionist when it does to my MATHS SKILLS?

Maybe this is a symptom of a brain bleed.

Great, I knew it.

OH STOP IT, MIA, YOU DO NOT HAVE A BRAIN BLEED! YOU HAVE THE BEST DOCTOR IN GENOVIA TREATING YOU!

I am just upset because I am not going to see Michael for a long, long time.

And I miss him so much.

Tuesday, December 24, later

Maybe his phone battery died and he cannot find a recharger?

And maybe there's no electricity where he is because of this snow?

Well, at least I am not thinking he has found himself a geisha. That's an improvement for me.

Should I call Dr Knutz and tell him I am indeed becoming more self-confident and less emotionally unstable?

Tuesday, December 24, later

Rene said that a bottle of a fine French wine would doubtlessly cheer me up.

I assured him that his phone recharger would make me happier.

Tuesday, December 24, later

I have the best grandmother ever! How could I ever doubt that?

Wait – did I say the best?

Rene said that she is definitely not happy with me, but he wasn't sure whether it was because of the tree incident or because Kjetil has a girlfriend that is way prettier than I am. Apparently Grandmere thinks now she has to do all the work herself. You know, making Arne fall in love with Genovia (ok, mainly the Dowager Princess but whatever).

I feel the love.

Tuesday, December 24, later

Another flaw in Christmas movies – they are all about family values and spending time with your family.

Dad too has left the palace to spend time with his what's-her-name girlfriend / attend another rendezvous regarding the elections (do politicians really have no life? But if I think about those politicians that attended Grandmere's pre-Christmas dinner-disaster, I am not that surprised, really) – René wasn't sure where he went, but anyway, isn't part of the reason why I am in Genovia during Christmas to spend time with Dad and Grandmere (ok, since Grandmere now basically lives in Plaza maybe this argument falls short)?

Well, where are they, let's spend time together!

I never thought I'd say this but thank god for Sebastiano and René. They are actually semi-entertaining.

But I bet they would be fully entertaining in New York.

Tuesday, December 24, later

Update on a cat: nobody has seen her yet, so apparently she is alive.

Update on my ankle: it is black.

Like literally black.

So black that it looks like I have gangrene. Not that I know how gangrene looks but it must look somehow like this.

Well, I guess having your leg amputated as a consequence of saving a life is kind of noble.

Tuesday, December 24, later

I bet the doctor is tired of my complaints. He says I most definitely do not have gangrene and it is just a bruise.

Tuesday, December 24, later

Is sending your boyfriend three rather desperate emails too obsessive? I mean, since he still hasn't replied to the first?

René just laughs and says I am crazy but according to him sending three attention-needing emails is still not as drastic as traveling to Japan alone and unannounced.

But then again, I do not think René is a reliable source of relationship advice since I doubt he knows that a one night stand does not equal a healthy, functioning relationship I have with Michael or at least attempting/pretending to have.

Tuesday, December 24, later

Maybe the tree incident got me out of princess duties for a few days but Andrew's wedding, no, I still have to attend that.

Not just attend; Andrew wants me to be his ... I don't know, a bridesmaid?

He said that if it wasn't for me, he still wouldn't be honest with himself and admit not just to others but mainly to himself who he really was. He said that thanks to me, he finally realized that the greatest and most difficult thing in life is to be true with yourself. If it wasn't for me, he would still suppress his real self in order to please his family and be the ideal son his father wanted him to be.

Basically, I am the reason why he is getting married in the first place.

Maybe HE has a brain bleed. I am not nearly as inspiring as he is making me sound like.

Really, how can I not go now?

But then again ... Dad and Grandmere have been so attentive these past few days, they wouldn't even notice if I disappeared for a day.